Maybe you're just not a cat person.(alt titles Más Negro Que la Noche, Darker Than Night) Approachability: 8/10 (Funny, spooky thriller with borderline Giallo/Slasher vibes) Content Warnings: Jump scares; Spooky haunted house tropes; Pet death Next Week’s Film RandomHorror9 T-Shirts! Hosts: Jeffrey Cranor & Cecil Baldwin (Find more of our work on W…

Sure you like Wordle and Connections, but have you tried Hell Box? Approachability: 1/10 (Graphic gore, blood, goo, body horror, etc.) Content Warnings: Graphic blood/gore; Body horror; Medical Institutional horror; Self-harm Next Week’s Film* RandomHorror9 T-Shirts! Hosts: Jeffrey Cranor & Cecil Baldwin (Find more of our work on Welcome to Night V…

1980s sax appeal Special Guest: Symphony Sanders https://twitter.com/SymphonySanders Approachability: 8/10 (Totally 80s PG-13 horror ) Content Warnings: Mild Blood/gore; Jump scares Next Week’s Film Sat June 29 Livestream: NOPE (2022) patreon.com/randomhorror9 RandomHorror9 T-Shirts! Hosts: Jeffrey Cranor & Cecil Baldwin (Find more of our work on W…

Maybe time to check Zillow for a new place to live. Approachability: 8/10 (Psychological sci-fi drama about depression/loneliness) Content Warnings: Pandemic Apocalypse; Child death; Dog death; Extreme loss/loneliness/sadness Next Week’s Film RandomHorror9 T-Shirts! Hosts: Jeffrey Cranor & Cecil Baldwin (Find more of our work on Welcome to Night Va…

Ask your doctor if Graboids are right for you. Approachability: 8/10 ( Very PG-ish and fun monster movie ) Content Warnings: Some gooey gore; animal death Next Week’s Film RandomHorror9 T-Shirts! Hosts: Jeffrey Cranor & Cecil Baldwin (Find more of our work on Welcome to Night Vale) Logo: David Baldwin Random Horror 9 Patreon YouTube, Twitter, Lette…

The time-traveling witch does not like your shower. Approachability: 9/10 (80s TV-level scares ) Content Warnings: Blood/Gore; Intense fat-shaming; Medical Horror Next Week’s Film RandomHorror9 T-Shirts! Hosts: Jeffrey Cranor & Cecil Baldwin (Find more of our work on Welcome to Night Vale) Logo: David Baldwin Random Horror 9 Patreon YouTube, Twitte…

You're gonna need a spookier boat. Approachability: 7/10 ( Creepy, noir-style thriller w/ a million twists ) Content Warnings: Suicide; Spooky imagery; Rape revenge narrative; Animal murder. Next Week’s Film RandomHorror9 T-Shirts! Hosts: Jeffrey Cranor & Cecil Baldwin (Find more of our work on Welcome to Night Vale) Logo: David Baldwin Random Horr…

You'll never guess what this movie is about. Approachability: 7/10 (Lots of bloody, gory, and kind of hilarious practical effects) Content Warnings: Sexual Assault; Blood/gore Next Week’s Film RandomHorror9 T-Shirts! Hosts: Jeffrey Cranor & Cecil Baldwin (Find more of our work on Welcome to Night Vale) Logo: David Baldwin Random Horror 9 Patreon Yo…

The blanket monster wants your child. Approachability: 6/10 (Smart and taut thriller w some solid scares) Content Warnings: Jump scares; PTSD; Religious misogyny; Gaslighting Next Week’s Film Live Stream: Sunday May 19 @ 3pm ET - MAD GOD (2022) RandomHorror9 T-Shirts! Hosts: Jeffrey Cranor & Cecil Baldwin (Find more of our work on Welcome to Night …

Stop and kill the flowers. Approachability: 7/10 ( Sci-Fi thriller classic; More gross than gory w/ decent jump scares ) Content Warnings: Gaslighting; Jump scares; Gross/gooey SFX; Blood/gore Next Week’s Film RandomHorror9 T-Shirts! Hosts: Jeffrey Cranor & Cecil Baldwin (Find more of our work on Welcome to Night Vale) Logo: David Baldwin Random Ho…

You may be wondering exactly what this movie is about… Approachability: 7/10 ( Real bloody but all in service to comedy ) Content Warnings: Blood/gore; Animal harm; Excessive drug use Next Week’s Film RandomHorror9 T-Shirts! Hosts: Jeffrey Cranor & Cecil Baldwin (Find more of our work on Welcome to Night Vale) Editing: Grant Stewart Logo: David Bal…

Nice family gets along great. Approachability: 3/10 ( Violent, scary, funny, creative ) Content Warnings: Blood/Violence; Home invasion; Jump scares Next Week’s Film RandomHorror9 T-Shirts! Hosts: Jeffrey Cranor & Cecil Baldwin (Find more of our work on Welcome to Night Vale) Logo: David Baldwin Random Horror 9 Patreon YouTube, Twitter, Letterboxd,…

We came here to talk about They Live and chew bubblegum… Approachability: 9/10 ( Creepy but not graphic. An A-list B-movie. ) Content Warnings: Creepy imagery; Police brutality; Gun violence Next Week’s Film LIVE STREAM: Sat Apr 20 @ 3pm ET - THE WAILING (2016) patreon.com/randomhorror9 RandomHorror9 T-Shirts! Hosts: Jeffrey Cranor & Cecil Baldwin …

Looks like someone didn't read the Live Laugh Love sign in the family room… Approachability: 3/10 ( Scary and unsettling. Lots of visuals to haunt your dreams. ) Content Warnings: Animal/child death; Jump Scares; Creepy faces/imagery; Strong Depression narrative; Extreme high pitch noises Next Week’s Film RandomHorror9 T-Shirts! Hosts: Jeffrey Cran…

This is why I dress like Winnie the Pooh Approachability: 6/10 ( Over the top agitprop comedy. Gory, not scary ) Content Warnings: Blood/Gore; Child death; Labor exploitation Next Week’s Film RandomHorror9 T-Shirts! Hosts: Jeffrey Cranor & Cecil Baldwin (Find more of our work on Welcome to Night Vale) Editing: Grant Stewart Logo: David Baldwin Rand…

Hey, do you think it smells like inthebox around here? Special Guests: Jonny & Aileen of ¡Uy Que Horror! Approachability: 3/10 ( Dark, bleak, gross, and creepy ) Content Warnings: Blood/Gore; Jump scares; Graphic rape/torture description; Suicide; Fatphobic, homophobic, ableist slurs; Kevin Spacey Next Week’s Film RandomHorror9 T-Shirts! Hosts: Jef…

Sometimes you gotta do more than just punch N*zis. Approachability: 1/10 ( Gore fest w plenty of jump scares & creative deaths ) Content Warnings: Jump scares; Blood/gore; Claustrophobia; Animal death Next Week’s Film LIVESTREAM Sat Mar 23 @ 3pm: His House (2020) only on our Patreon! RandomHorror9 T-Shirts! Hosts: Jeffrey Cranor & Cecil Baldwin (Fi…

He's just a brat. Don't lose your head. Approachability: 7/10 ( A couple of classic horror-y deaths, but pretty campy overall ) Content Warnings: Child death; Suicide; Jump scares; Over the top death scenes Next Week’s Film RandomHorror9 T-Shirts! Hosts: Jeffrey Cranor & Cecil Baldwin (Find more of our work on Welcome to Night Vale) Editing: Grant …

Dirtbike shitheads are at it again Approachability: 5/10 ( Not as gory & we thought; More fairy-tale horror than gloopy/gloppy horror ) Content Warnings: Child death; Jump Scares; Blood/Gore; Suicide; Domestic Abuse Next Week’s Film RandomHorror9 T-Shirts! Hosts: Jeffrey Cranor & Cecil Baldwin (Find more of our work on Welcome to Night Vale) Editin…

Maybe don't buy a Plymouth Special Guest: Chris Brown Approachability: 9/10 ( Made-for-TV drama-thriller ) Content Warnings: Road rage tension; jump scares. Next Week’s Film RandomHorror9 T-Shirts! Hosts: Jeffrey Cranor & Cecil Baldwin (Find more of our work on Welcome to Night Vale) Editing: Grant Stewart Logo: David Baldwin Random Horror 9 Patreo…

What goes around comes around. Approachability: 8/10 (Good-hearted (but still exploitative), dark morality tale) Content Warnings: Ableist caricatures/epithets; body horror Next Week’s Film LIVESTREAM Sat Feb 24: TEETH (2007) patreon.com/randomhorror9 RandomHorror9 T-Shirts! Hosts: Jeffrey Cranor & Cecil Baldwin (Find more of our work on Welcome to…

The title is the plot. Special Guest: Jen Brown Approachability: 1/10 ( Scary as shit ) Content Warnings: Blood/gore; Jump scares; Child death; Creepy shit; Suicide Next Week’s Film RandomHorror9 T-Shirts! Hosts: Jeffrey Cranor & Cecil Baldwin (Find more of our work on Welcome to Night Vale) Editing: Grant Stewart Logo: David Baldwin Random Horror …

Hollywood's a cutthroat business Approachability: 6/10 (Bloody and twisted, but super fun ) Content Warnings: Animal death; Jump scares; Blood/gore Next Week’s Film RandomHorror9 T-Shirts! Hosts: Jeffrey Cranor & Cecil Baldwin (Find more of our work on Welcome to Night Vale) Editing: Grant Stewart Logo: David Baldwin Random Horror 9 Patreon YouTube…

What if a city… but also a giant monster? Special Guest Brie Williams Approachability: 4/10 (Action-packed found-footage with scares and some gore) Content Warnings: Disturbing disaster footage; Shaky camera; Aggressive spiderlike creatures; Blood/Gore; Jump scares. Next Week’s Film RandomHorror9 T-Shirts! Hosts: Jeffrey Cranor & Cecil Baldwin (Fin…

Salesman of the Year: Cheech Marin Special Guest: Symphony Sanders Approachability: 4/10 (Splattery action/comedy; Not scary, but pretty gross) Content Warnings: Sexual Assault; Gun Violence; Blood/Gore; Ableist/Racist/Sexist Language Next Week’s Film LIVE STREAM Jan 27: A Nightmare On Elm Street 3: Dream Warriors Join us live on Patreon. RandomHor…

Welcome to Nun Island Approachability: 3/10 ( The scares are clunky, but it gets gory when it wants ) Content Warnings: Stabby murders; Blood/gore; Animal Cruelty; Body Horror; Creepy kids Next Week’s Film RandomHorror9 T-Shirts! Hosts: Jeffrey Cranor & Cecil Baldwin (Find more of our work on Welcome to Night Vale) Editing: Grant Stewart Logo: Davi…

Look, ma! Two hands! Approachability: 4/10 ( Arty as hell but when it goes Horror it goes Hard ) Content Warnings: Slashery Blood/gore, Animal death, Rape, Suicide, Child abuse Next Week’s Film RandomHorror9 T-Shirts! Hosts: Jeffrey Cranor & Cecil Baldwin (Find more of our work on Welcome to Night Vale) Editing: Grant Stewart Logo: David Baldwin Ra…

PSA: Always wear your seatbelt! Special Guest: Julia Schifini Approachability: 9/10 ( Campy satire; A couple of gory scenes but far more comedy than horror) Content Warnings: Blood/Gore For an episode about Vacaciones de Terror (1989), check out ¡Uy Que Horror!'s really fun episode on this wild-ass film. Next Week’s Film RandomHorror9 T-Shirts! Hos…

This movie is about f*ckin' cars. Approachability: 2/10 ( Dark, tragic, and Cronenberg-level body horrors ) Content Warnings: Body Horror; Blood/Gore Next Week’s Film RandomHorror9 T-Shirts! Hosts: Jeffrey Cranor & Cecil Baldwin (Find more of our work on Welcome to Night Vale) Editing: Grant Stewart Logo: David Baldwin Random Horror 9 Patreon YouTu…

"A true leader recognizes defeat as an educational moment." # The voice of Tony Tollinger is Joey Rizzolo, joeyrizzolo.com Written by Jeffrey Cranor and Janina Matthewson. Music: Mary Epworth, maryepworth.com Director: Janina Matthewson Producer: Jeffrey Cranor Available Now: YOU FEEL IT JUST BELOW THE RIBS (a novel) by Jeffrey Cranor and Janina Ma…

There's a metaphor in this film somewhere. I'm sure of it. Approachability: 8/10 ( Way more 90s action/sci-fi than horror ) Content Warnings: Animal harm/death; Blood/gore Next Week’s Film RandomHorror9 T-Shirts! Hosts: Jeffrey Cranor & Cecil Baldwin (Find more of our work on Welcome to Night Vale) Editing: Grant Stewart Logo: David Baldwin Random …

Throw a party worthy of the end of the world Approachability: 10/10 ( Beautiful and campy and creepy) Content Warnings: Jump scares; Mild blood; Cruelty Next Week’s Film LIVE STREAM: Sun Dec 17 ANNA AND THE APOCALYPSE (2018) patreon.com/randomhorror9 RandomHorror9 T-Shirts! Hosts: Jeffrey Cranor & Cecil Baldwin (Find more of our work on Welcome to …

"It does not matter if the evidence is accurate to who you are now. It simply needs to be true to who you will be in the future." # The voice of Tony Tollinger is Joey Rizzolo, joeyrizzolo.com Written by Jeffrey Cranor and Janina Matthewson. Music: Mary Epworth, maryepworth.com Director: Janina Matthewson Producer: Jeffrey Cranor Available Now: YOU…

"Every choice you make can cause you to either appreciate or depreciate in value." # The voice of Tony Tollinger is Joey Rizzolo, joeyrizzolo.com Written by Jeffrey Cranor and Janina Matthewson. Music: Mary Epworth, maryepworth.com Director: Janina Matthewson Producer: Jeffrey Cranor Available Now: YOU FEEL IT JUST BELOW THE RIBS (a novel) by Jeffr…

Are you there, God? It's me, Brian De Palma's male gaze. Approachability: 4/10 ( Bloody bully-fest ) Content Warnings: Extreme Bullying; Child Abuse; Bloody violence; Animal Death; Description of rape Next Week’s Film RandomHorror9 T-Shirts! Hosts: Jeffrey Cranor & Cecil Baldwin (Find more of our work on Welcome to Night Vale) Editing: Grant Stewar…

"What story do you tell yourself? And what stories do you think others tell themselves about you?" # The voice of Tony Tollinger is Joey Rizzolo, joeyrizzolo.com Written by Jeffrey Cranor and Janina Matthewson. Music: Mary Epworth, maryepworth.com Director: Janina Matthewson Producer: Jeffrey Cranor Available Now: YOU FEEL IT JUST BELOW THE RIBS (a…

Hornt up… for death! Approachability: 3/10 (Very silly and fun, with tons of gory practical fx) Content Warnings: Strobe lights; Overt misogyny; Extreme Blood/Gore Next Week’s Film https://www.justwatch.com/us/movie/carrie-1976 RandomHorror9 T-Shirts! Hosts: Jeffrey Cranor & Cecil Baldwin (Find more of our work on Welcome to Night Vale) Editing: Gr…

"How ambitious is your love, your appetite, your social life? How able are you to keep up?" # The voice of Tony Tollinger is Joey Rizzolo, joeyrizzolo.com Written by Jeffrey Cranor and Janina Matthewson. Music: Mary Epworth, maryepworth.com Director: Janina Matthewson Producer: Jeffrey Cranor Available Now: YOU FEEL IT JUST BELOW THE RIBS (a novel)…

The lesson here is get better friends Approachability: 2/10 (Relentless stalker horror) Content Warnings: Abusive relationship; Stalking; Suicide; Gaslighting; Blood/gore Next Week’s Film Livestream: Sat Nov 25 @ 3pm: SESSION 9 (2001) patreon.com/randomhorror9 RandomHorror9 T-Shirts! Hosts: Jeffrey Cranor & Cecil Baldwin (Find more of our work on W…

"Your body has powers of perception that you cannot imagine." # The voice of Tony Tollinger is Joey Rizzolo, joeyrizzolo.com Written by Jeffrey Cranor and Janina Matthewson. Music: Mary Epworth, maryepworth.com Director: Janina Matthewson Producer: Jeffrey Cranor Available Now: YOU FEEL IT JUST BELOW THE RIBS (a novel) by Jeffrey Cranor and Janina …