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Popping Perfectionism

Anna Tibbitts and Alysha Turner

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Perfectionism is a highly misunderstood concept. This mindset and lifestyle is often pursued in an attempt to save ourselves from negative life experiences such as awkwardness, embarrassment, and shame. This podcast delves into the negative impacts of perfectionism and how and why it damages individuals, relationships, and families. With 8 years of perfectionism research and a couple decades of life experience, co-hosts Anna and Alysha take you through the different ways you can recognize, c ...
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Perfectionism demands it all - the relationship with yourself, with romantic partners, with spirituality, and now, you're about to learn how it demands your professional relationships as well. From work-life balance to imposter syndrome to just getting through the full-time grind, this season has it all. We can't wait for you to listen!…
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The long-awaited season finale of our romantic relationships series is HERE! In this episode, we gather all of our best thoughts, research, and insights about perfectionism and romantic relationships to give you the ultimate recap to our 3rd season. You also get a sneak peek at how our own romantic lives have been the last few months. Brace yoursel…
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Perfectionism loves to pollute many things, including our romantic relationships. All three forms of perfectionism fuel comparison and unrealistic expectations, resulting in shattered fantasies of relationships and loneliness. Tune in to hear Alysha and Anna dig into how comparison and expectations taint connection and cultivate romantic relationsh…
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In this episode, we talk about something almost every perfectionist relationship goes through: expecting you, your partner, or both of you to fill every single role and need for each other. Perfectionism loves painting things black and white, especially when its comes to romance and needs. Tune in to hear how to recognize these patterns and what to…
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Rejection and feedback can sometimes feel DEADLY for perfectionists, especially in romantic relationships. Even though honestly and candor is critical to a healthy relationship, it is also the very thing that can cause perfectionists to retreat, overthink, ruminate, and save face, hindering connection even more. Tune in to hear how to combat this a…
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We are coming in HOT in this episode with research, theories, and practices all centered on how perfectionism plays into attachment styles. Attachment styles are a HUGE part of romantic relationships and, as it always does, perfectionism loves to find its way into the spotlight with each style. This episode will help you resonate with your own pers…
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So much of perfectionism hinges on the belief that life is a series of events, not experiences. And relationships are no exception - in fact, they may be the poster child for this mindset. This episode talks about how having an event-based mentality can sabotage relationships and how adjusting to focus on experiences rather than events and outcomes…
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Do you find yourself people-pleasing, blending in, or only showing specific versions of yourself in order to maintain others' opinion of you? Do you do this especially in dating? Well then, this episode is for you. We lose a lot of connections in dating because we don't allow others to see who we really are - because of perfectionism. Should we sho…
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Are you READY for this next series?? We talk about ALL things relationships and perfectionism. Relationships are the BREEDING GROUND for perfectionism. They put our insecurities in the limelight and make our egos absolutely squirm. From dating to divorce to marriage to singlehood, this series will cover it all. Be sure to tune in and let us know wh…
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We've made it people! The last episode of this series. After everything we've covered with perfectionism within the LDS culture, this episode contains our final, juiciest, most emphasized thoughts. Everything we want you to remember how perfectionism and God, yourself, and your relationship with the church and others in it, is in this episode. Be s…
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If you're a member of the church, you already know about the plethora of "gray areas" within the church that each member chooses to approach differently. These gray areas range from R-rated movies to modesty to Sunday activities and more. Perfectionism plays a large part in how we view ourselves and other people when it comes to these "gray areas".…
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One of the most magnified environments for perfectionism to fester is missions. If we're talking about people-pleasing, image maintaining, unrealistic expectations, and self-criticism, missions are the perfect storm. And it's a storm we don't talk about enough. Tune in to hear how perfectionism affects current missionaries, return missionaries, peo…
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We keep teasing you with these surprise off-weeks, but we are back now with another episode - and one of our best yet! We just got done hashing out repentance and perfectionism and now we are talking about one of the most beautiful concepts in the church: Grace. Grace is a gift from God. We don't do anything to earn it or deserve it. No one is more…
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WE'RE BACK! Did you miss us?? Thought we'd give everyone a week off to catch up on this season - but now we're back with (as always) one of our favorite episodes: Repentance and Perfectionism. Perfectionism is one of the leading culprits in why repentance has gained such a negative connotation within all religions, but specifically within the Churc…
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We've had tons of people dm-ing us questions about our episodes and perfectionism in general and we wanted to take an entire episode to address them! We didn't get to all of them, but we will do more of these in the future. Tune in to hear how we answer questions such as the following: Where did perfectionism begin within church culture? How does p…
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Perfectionism can be used as a weapon - sometimes we use it against ourselves, sometimes we use it against others, but it is very often used by Satan to isolate and sever us from our true selves, others, and God. Some of our best outside resources and analogies are used in this episode to paint the picture of how Satan has used perfectionism to tea…
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Perfectionism bleeds onto everything, including God's character! And once God's character has been colored in a perfectionist light, it warps everything else about the church, its culture, and how its members view themselves and others. In this episode, we talk about WHY God is not a perfectionist, how He never could be, and how us thinking He is h…
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Perfectionism seems to find its way into everything, and Zion is no exception. Zion is a place where everyone has a place, unconditionally. Perfectionism convinces us that others need to meet certain benchmarks before they can be accepted and loved. Zion is about keeping baptismal covenants and lifting others. Perfectionism says that we don't need …
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We're BACK with a brand new series and loads of new content! In this series, we talk about something no one really seems to address: Perfectionism and the LDS culture. LDS is short for The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter Day Saints (also known around the world as Mormons or Latter Day Saints). In this first episode, we talk about how we got here a…
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We made it!! We are at the final episode of this series. We decided to use this episode to share our full personal stories with perfectionism and some final thoughts that we weren't able to touch on in the previous episodes. Some of our best nuggets of wisdom are packed into these 45 minutes, so be sure to tune in! Thank you to our listeners for st…
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In this episode, we cover our last form of perfectionism. Socially-Prescribed perfectionism derives itself from pressures set by a culture, society, or other external groups. A lot of elements play into this from of perfectionism including social media and social circles. Tune in to hear ways to recognize, identify, and combat this form of perfecti…
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In this episode, we explore the relationship-killing form of perfectionism: other-oriented. Being an other-oriented perfectionist has a double-edged sword. It can be a very lonely way to live in addition to being really toxic for yourself and others. Often, other-oriented perfectionism is born from self-oriented perfectionism. You're only as hard o…
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Welcome back to Popping Perfectionism! Today we dive into the inner-workings of one of our most familiar and dreaded topics: self-oriented perfectionism. This form of perfectionism packs quite a punch and is where the other forms of perfectionism (to be discussed in coming episodes) typically stem from. Join us on this episode as we talk about the …
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In this episode, we talk about the two foundational dimensions of perfectionism as well as a common side effect of perfectionism: The Chameleon Syndrome. By participating in the two perfectionism dimensions of unrealistic goals and self-criticism, we train our minds to constantly beat down on our self-esteem, worth, and identity. This often causes …
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