The guys discuss exactly what is the most important item to pack when skydiving, why having an opinion while working retail in Scotland requires wearing a helmet, and how if 2 sailors can scrape up a sign no title is necessary to transfer ownership of a WWII submarine.By Damon Puracchio and Ted Willson

The guys discuss why all Mountain Dew should be opened by day 29, how owning a boat directly relates to an endless supply of free goats, and when a “First Name” salutation assures an effective recruitment campaign.By Damon Puracchio and Ted Willson

The guys discuss how to enjoy a meal on an unstable surface, when violating a statue makes you fertile, and why a brown notebook can literally halt the waffle distribution in Tennessee.By Damon Puracchio and Ted Willson

The guys discuss how the calendar can dictate entertainment, why it’s important to jump ahead almost an hour today, and when you realize you’ve been had knowing you sometimes just gotta sing along.By Damon Puracchio and Ted Willson

The guys discuss how smoking in birdcages is next to impossible yet eating a sandwich is not, why being a healthy Frolfer makes you way more popular during wedding season, and when removing your wide-brimmed hat assures you a free fifty pound Tarpon.By Damon Puracchio and Ted Willson

The guys discuss how Damon’s saved soul qualifies him as a hero, when “six to a stick” is the only acceptable measurement for a green coaster on your table, and why turtle tunnels are essential in preventing train derailment.By Damon Puracchio and Ted Willson

The discuss how flexible scheduling only guarantees frustration and not employment, why they will never put ATMs in funeral homes, and when a dog tossed over the fence to a polar bear will definitely be be caught with left hand and get you free admission.By Damon Puracchio and Ted Willson

The guys discuss how a pizza party makes every bank robbery more memorable, why swimming with pants on is imperative when you have a shellfish allergy, and when it’s justified to shoot a bear with an “alleged” drug problem.By Damon Puracchio and Ted Willson

The guys discuss what’s the actual probability of being shot at 300 yards by a girthy bush, why you would never brag about the 30 acres you inherited from your Uncle Roland, and how path proximity is crucial when sounding the alarm for the leash police.By Damon Puracchio and Ted Willson

The guys discuss who really benefits from having a fake family member at times, why a departed loved one should only expect a heavenly high five, and how a reckless semi driver can unknowingly reach hero status in the wake of his chaos.By Damon Puracchio and Ted Willson

The guys discuss how you never use the first beak when pulling an accurate measurement, why you can't expect 145 tons of black market chicken to be any cooler than room temperature, and when is the ONLY TIME you'll ever hear a mourner say "we're all better off". instagram.com/thatchecksoutwdt facebook.com/thatchecksoutwithdamonandted Recorded at Au…

The guys discuss why choosing the correct prison activity can definitely change your sentence, how the lower your avocados hang the thicker your guacamole gets, and where your pizza literally comes out of the oven hot as lava. instagram.com/thatchecksoutwdt facebook.com/thatchecksoutwithdamonandted Recorded at Audiohive Podcasting Hosted on Transis…

The guys discuss how timing is everything when it comes to a pebble exchange, why there’s so much collateral damage with Damon’s misdirected wishes, and when is the appropriate time to report a pee-soaked neck pillow. instagram.com/thatchecksoutwdt facebook.com/thatchecksoutwithdamonandted Recorded at Audiohive Podcasting Hosted on Transistor.fm…

The guys discuss when it is most important to wake up early in Finland, why someone telling you how hot your mom was leads to and early 80’s Rampage, and how death metal was monumental in the 1880’s to detour men from hosiery and booze. instagram.com/thatchecksoutwdt facebook.com/thatchecksoutwithdamonandted Recorded at Audiohive Podcasting Hosted …

The guys discuss why it’s fiscally responsible to always know where your driveway is, what makes the first 60 seconds of a random Central Florida garage sale so dangerous, and when showing “kindness” to your neighbors can get you life in prison. instagram.com/thatchecksoutwdt facebook.com/thatchecksoutwithdamonandted Recorded at Audiohive Podcastin…

The guys discuss when a wafflestomp proves you did not cheat at Chinese Chess, how Canadians simply do not tolerate pretend witchcraft, and why having a mullet and an unpopular last name will get your bread an end cap display at your local grocer. instagram.com/thatchecksoutwdt facebook.com/thatchecksoutwithdamonandted Recorded at Audiohive Podcast…

The guys discuss when 25 minutes means it’s time to drop the purse and start the car, how wood testosterone is 17% greater than ball testosterone, and why holiday eye contact is so imperative in avoiding wang fractures. instagram.com/thatchecksoutwdt facebook.com/thatchecksoutwithdamonandted Recorded at Audiohive Podcasting Hosted on Transistor.fm…

The guys discuss just how flammable paint CAN be on a Stanley mug, when stage diving CAN cost you a new pair of kicks, why being shot 27 times and getting hit with grenade shrapnel CAN still be better than being at home with the family. instagram.com/thatchecksoutwdt facebook.com/thatchecksoutwithdamonandted Recorded at Audiohive Podcasting Hosted …

The guys discuss why the new Grand Theft Auto will feature gospel music, how to play the odds of the dead jockey winning the race, and when a smoking corpse is the most expensive Uber. instagram.com/thatchecksoutwdt facebook.com/thatchecksoutwithdamonandted Recorded at Audiohive Podcasting Hosted on Transistor.fm…

The guys discuss how why when you go on vacation for 15 years your house gets demolished, how a man named Tony’s stories got completely omitted from a very popular book, and when a marketplace motherboard post is far more successful than Tinder. instagram.com/thatchecksoutwdt facebook.com/thatchecksoutwithdamonandted Recorded at Audiohive Podcastin…

The guys discuss why calling 719-266-2837 will automatically make any day better, how the complex anatomy of a turtle works while explaining it to Damon, and what might possibly be the world’s worst law firm representation. instagram.com/thatchecksoutwdt facebook.com/thatchecksoutwithdamonandted Recorded at Audiohive Podcasting Hosted on Transistor…

The guys discuss when it can be a felony if you “ain’t no hollaback girl”, why Domino’s regrets not thoroughly explaining what constitutes an “emergency” to Damon, and how Iowa is the hub for a crappy giraffe jewelry smuggling ring from Kenya. instagram.com/thatchecksoutwdt facebook.com/thatchecksoutwithdamonandted Recorded at Audiohive Podcasting …

The guys discuss why the answer to “Grandma Ending Thanksgiving $500” is “What Is Defecation?”, when confrontation is the only way to retain your Cheez-Its, and how cussing in front of a baby can result in homicide. instagram.com/thatchecksoutwdt facebook.com/thatchecksoutwithdamonandted Recorded at Audiohive Podcasting Hosted on Transistor.fm…

The guys discuss the hidden dangers of allowing retired opera singers access to their bow and arrow collection, how when you’re the first to invent something nurses lineup to rub it all over you, and why you’ll never have enough washer fluid to remove a corpse from your windshield. instagram.com/thatchecksoutwdt facebook.com/thatchecksoutwithdamona…

The guys discuss why an infection requires the correct anecdote to heal properly, when milk filled bagpipes guarantee you can be a hero for an entire millennium, and how you should NEVER let a woman enter your Dohyō! instagram.com/thatchecksoutwdt facebook.com/thatchecksoutwithdamonandted Recorded at Audiohive Podcasting Hosted on Transistor.fm…

The guys discuss what it means to Finnish your beer while home alone in your underwear, why cinnamon and a blue raspberry slush guarantees a win for Damon on Holiday Food Wars, and how an attractive flight attendant and an overly confident G.I.Joe game gets you a story you’ll refuse to tell under oath. instagram.com/thatchecksoutwdt facebook.com/th…

The guys discuss when a 3 Casino head start is necessary for a fair race, how adopting a chimpanzee will make your kids dumber, and why Kia is the official car of the unemployed exotic dancer. instagram.com/thatchecksoutwdt facebook.com/thatchecksoutwithdamonandted Recorded at Audiohive Podcasting Hosted on Transistor.fm…

The guys discuss how big an animal has to be to perceive Damon as adorable, why a routine tank inventory is necessary if you’re next to a scrap yard, and who is responsible for the Drunken-Trash Panda Movement currently plaguing Germany. instagram.com/thatchecksoutwdt facebook.com/thatchecksoutwithdamonandted Recorded at Audiohive Podcasting Hosted…

The guys discuss how loading your belongings on a cart repeatedly solidifies a new customer discount, why the absence of heat in a snake shape will endanger the entire trailer park, and when a fat guy using an 800PSI bidet in your front yard means your vinyl siding is clean. instagram.com/thatchecksoutwdt facebook.com/thatchecksoutwithdamonandted R…

The guys discuss why the perfect toilet paper is monumental when cleaning up the sloppiest of kisses, how the ladies couldn’t care less about your scientific prowess, and when a privacy fence, chicken coop, and a blind eye can get you out of child support. instagram.com/thatchecksoutwdt facebook.com/thatchecksoutwithdamonandted Recorded at Audiohiv…

The guys discuss who’s the only person in the whole world that’s more self-confident than Damon, why it’s so imperative to be loud if you want to hear Piano Man, and what exactly is the stripper to machine operator in one of the luckiest of factory jobs you could ever have. instagram.com/thatchecksoutwdt facebook.com/thatchecksoutwithdamonandted Re…

If you're reading this then that means we are in a state of emergency or Ted's finally had enough of Damon. Either way, enjoy the nonsensical banter between two idiots that apparently cannot get their priorities straight this week! instagram.com/thatchecksoutwdt facebook.com/thatchecksoutwithdamonandted Recorded at Audiohive Podcasting Hosted on Tr…

The guys discuss when is the exact best time to "special order" your laundry, why tactical pants just never seem to live up to their name, and how no survey is ever accurate unless you talk you 100% of the dogs. instagram.com/thatchecksoutwdt facebook.com/thatchecksoutwithdamonandted Recorded at Audiohive Podcasting Hosted on Transistor.fm…

The guys discuss when an empty driveway can give you extreme HOCO sign confidence, why a free fritter for one cannot legally influence the dinner plans of many, and how ordering your breakfast skillet with onions can eliminate any possibility of having to share with a giraffe. instagram.com/thatchecksoutwdt facebook.com/thatchecksoutwithdamonandted…

The guys discuss when your calendar can get you disqualified from the Olympics, why "dress casual" is the new norm for dumpster diving, and how the song Enter Sandman was actually inspired by dolphins. instagram.com/thatchecksoutwdt facebook.com/thatchecksoutwithdamonandted Recorded at Audiohive Podcasting Hosted on Transistor.fm…

The guys discuss why having lunch ready on Mars is so imperative, how Faco Fridays is going to become the new staple in the restaurant world, and when AI gets thwarted by a room full of "human lickers." instagram.com/thatchecksoutwdt facebook.com/thatchecksoutwithdamonandted Recorded at Audiohive Podcasting Hosted on Transistor.fm…

The guys discuss how a three year nap can get you out of taking the trash out, when the possibility of nudity justifies a total reconfiguration of a mass transit system, and what exactly is the current street value of a swaddled cat as it pertains to vacation destinations. instagram.com/thatchecksoutwdt facebook.com/thatchecksoutwithdamonandted Rec…

The guys discuss how many skulls it takes to make you suspicious, when the temperature of nuggets can affect your bank balance, and why it's a terrible idea to lose your head over camel cuddle time. instagram.com/thatchecksoutwdt facebook.com/thatchecksoutwithdamonandted Recorded at Audiohive Podcasting Hosted on Transistor.fm…

The guys discuss why Ted is too old to go back to college, when Damon's keys always lead to the scene of the crime, and how you can be blind to the best french whiskey you've always never tried. instagram.com/thatchecksoutwdt facebook.com/thatchecksoutwithdamonandted Recorded at Audiohive Podcasting Hosted on Transistor.fm…

The guys discuss why there's nothing more supportive than feathers and a Captain America diaper, where you can get your membership revoked merely for sharing TikTok videos with a gorilla, and how the number one cause of "ghost divorce" amongst singers has nothing to do with paranormal appearances. instagram.com/thatchecksoutwdt facebook.com/thatche…

The guys discuss how Damon's contemplating a career move based on delicious traffic stops, why you may have to pull up to the next window and wait for your Swedish honey, and why eating a roll off your mom's face means love. instagram.com/thatchecksoutwdt facebook.com/thatchecksoutwithdamonandted Recorded at Audiohive Podcasting Hosted on Transisto…

The guys discuss how the street value of a kidney is far greater than you'd ever imagine, when a single T and a double L does not guarantee an expedited check-in, and why the roofs of orphanages have become the most sought after real estate in the billionaire community. instagram.com/thatchecksoutwdt facebook.com/thatchecksoutwithdamonandted Record…

The guys discuss how sometimes "taking your kid to work day" can go down in flames, when drinking with ceramic squirrels may be hazardous to your health, and why a burning perineum could only mean you need a candy bar. instagram.com/thatchecksoutwdt facebook.com/thatchecksoutwithdamonandted Recorded at Audiohive Podcasting Hosted on Transistor.fm…

The guys discuss a specialty crib design for those who hate children, why being an aerospace engineer takes way more qualifications than just impregnating a staggering number of women, and how it's completely acceptable to ask the police to round up your pigs when you are feeling overwhelmed. instagram.com/thatchecksoutwdt facebook.com/thatchecksou…

The guys discuss why you should never bury all your vampires vertically, where "loose" chickens can bring an entire transit system to a halt, and how an exemplary baboon employee will undoubtedly live until his death. instagram.com/thatchecksoutwdt facebook.com/thatchecksoutwithdamonandted Recorded at Audiohive Podcasting Hosted on Transistor.fm…

The guys discuss why the "bang room" at the church will save your marriage, how 5,475 days of sick leave should never affect your pay raise, and when a trick shot in the most confusing game of H.O.R.S.E. could result in the death of your mother-in-law. instagram.com/thatchecksoutwdt facebook.com/thatchecksoutwithdamonandted Recorded at Audiohive Po…

The guys discuss different "mile markers" left in stranger's yards during a marathon, how a rogue band of adolescent gobblers are endangering senior's kidneys, and why you should always take attendance before and after a hayrack ride. twitter.com/OutWdt instagram.com/thatchecksoutwdt facebook.com/thatchecksoutwithdamonandted Recorded at Audiohive P…

The guys discuss who reigns as the hide and seek champion of the world, how impersonating a fireman in a rented Kia can be quite a turn on to the ladies, and why eating the last of the microwaved delicacies in the house could cost you your life. twitter.com/OutWdt instagram.com/thatchecksoutwdt facebook.com/thatchecksoutwithdamonandted Recorded at …

The guys discuss that when you get killer hotel deals it's important to wash your feet before bed every night of your stay, how having your alligator "fully trained" just may keep it alive, and why combining the PGA and weddings will always result in tragedy. twitter.com/OutWdt instagram.com/thatchecksoutwdt facebook.com/thatchecksoutwithdamonandte…

The guys discuss how Ted's dismissal of specialty tea results in the dismissal of his discount, why a $100 debt means you can no longer eat corn on the cob, and when stealing fries from a complete stranger can get you to the semifinals of the annual flying rat invitational. twitter.com/OutWdt instagram.com/thatchecksoutwdt facebook.com/thatchecksou…