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"I Am Way Too Hot For This" - Caroline's Story
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Do college students REALLY have an understanding of consent?
The answer is “no." Many young people believe "yes" to hooking up means "yes" to any and all sexual acts. They mistakenly believe that "yes" to some sexual act yesterday, an hour ago or last week means "yes" forever to that act. None of these things are true.
Whether due to failed sexuality education programs, rapey cultural messages, caregivers naivete and insecurity about how to properly educate children about consent, there are grave misunderstandings about the nuanced aspects of many sexual hook ups. As a result, much of what is happening during hookups (especiallly when drunk) are closer to assault than consensual sex. Hint: you can not get consent from a drunk person.
While affirmative consent means your partner has willingly agreed to sexual acts that have been clearly communicated, it is just the legal low bar. In sexual hookups the goal should be enthusiastic consent. Not only is your partner agreeing to communicated sexual acts but they are desirous and excited to participate in them. This is enthusiastic consent “Yes please and I can not wait to do it!”
In this episode of 7 On Sundays™ we talk to Caroline, who has experienced sexual assault either intentionally or due to lack of education on the part of her partner. She did not consent to what happened during a hookup. The next day, the vague but scary, sickening, unwanted, and intrusive memories surface. Caroline shares her raw experiences and emotions about this harsh reality.
We are so grateful to Caroline, a heroic warrior willing to speak out to help others. She turns her experience from pain to triumph, even if only for her little sisters. Thank you Caroline.
RESOURCES
RAINN (Rape, Abuse, & Incest National Network) 800.656.HOPE,online.rainn.org y rainn.org/es
988 (National Suicide and Crisis Lifeline)
TIMESTAMP
00:00 Introduction and Trigger Warning
00:54 Welcome to 7 on Sundays
01:26 Introducing Caroline's Story
03:08 Caroline's Experience of Assault
09:43 Understanding Consent
14:27 Impact on Relationships and Self-Worth
17:27 Learning to Identify Sexual Assault
Setting Boundaries in your Relationship
25:30 Finding Self-Worth During Sex
33:21 Exploring Modern Sexual Norms
38:48 Healthy Intimacy and Communication
42:11 Reflecting on Self-Worth
44:36 Wrap-up: The Power of Consent Education
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