Art of Poverty

Art of the Assistant

“I love having the elephant in the room conversations,” said no one ever! I have been in several meetings over the years when you knew everyone there understood what the problem was but no one had the guts to speak up.

You’ve been there. Countless times. It’s always in the budget meeting. Staring at you is the elephant in the room yet you sit remaining silent.

These stories are “almost true” but the names are not real.

It is the night of the dreaded financial meeting with the elders. Your wife begs you to speak up this time. She sees the stress your current financial situation puts on you and is not only concerned about buying groceries but also her husband's health. “When the subject of raises comes up,” she says, “you had to let them know you were struggling.” Finally, the question came, “Should we hand out raises this year?” You sit in silence. Granted, you are making the same you did 5 years and three kids ago, but who’s counting anyway. You are thinking: “Surely the board will see everything I have done and how much help I have been around here. Man, without me this ministry would be dead in a year max. They must see that!” You continue to sit in silence. “Well I think it would be unwise to hand out raises again this year,” Bill says. “I think you are right Bill,” says the Pastor. “The economy is shaky, the old factory in town could close down at any time and money doesn’t grow on trees. It will be ok,” he continues, “God always meets our needs.”

You think! That is easy for him to say! It’s just the two of them with a combined yearly income of more than I will make in five years!

The meeting is over. You have a difficult time making eye contact with any of the board members as you leave. Worse yet, you know your wife is waiting at home for the big news.

If you have been in those meetings, I am sorry! I know what that feels like!

The fact is when you signed up for this (or when God signed you up) a vow of poverty seemed to come along as part of the calling. somehow many churches and senior pastors feel by having their associates live like a monk or priest it is somehow good for them. It is not. Jesuit Father James Bretzke says about living within the realms of his vow to poverty, “Poverty is also meant to mortify us…”

Some of you reading this right now have been mortified. You were mortified while standing in line at the DHHR applying for food stamps. You were mortified while applying for WIC. You were mortified when you had to do Christmas on December 27 because you needed the Christmas bonus to be able to afford presents for your children. You are mortified every time your car pulls into a public parking lot.

But YOU DID NOT TAKE A VOW OF POVERTY.

Now what I am going to say is from my own personal experiences. If you are looking for the strategy I recommend Dave Ramsey for a good shot in the arm. But please remember his book is not an appendix to the Scripture as some make it out to be.

So what can you do that I wish I would have done when I was an associate.

1. Stay away from credit cards!

2. Get a “real” job.

My oldest son was sitting in the back of the car when he was probably 6. Out of nowhere, he said, “Dad, I want a real job like Papaw when I grow up.” I said, “What do you mean?” “Well, Papaw works with tools and fixes things all day, all you do is read the Bible and talk to people!” He was right.

It took ten years of living in poverty before Carrie and I finally realized I needed a “real job.” The problem was I wasn’t like Papaw. I can’t fix anything! So we began to pray about what we could do to help ends meet. After much prayer, we felt I needed to start a martial arts business. I love to teach, I love kids, and I love Tae Kwon Do. I asked the pastor for permission to use the “annex” building on Tuesday and Thursdays and he graciously allowed me to do so. Long story short we outgrew the annex gym and I leased a building and had a very successful business going.

3. Have a difficult conversation.

Still not convinced bi-vocational is the way to go. Then sit down with your pastor and have a heart-to-heart.

I then sat down with my pastor and told him we were struggling financially and asked if the church could help. He said, “One time when we were in our early years of ministry we had no food in our house at all. We had no money and weren’t sure what we were going to do. When I got home from church that Sunday someone had filled our kitchen full of food. God took care of our needs. God will take care of your needs.”

He was right, God’s provision was there. It was most likely at another ministry or second job and I was too dumb, stubborn, and proud to consider it.

You have no one to blame for your current financial burden other than yourself. Is your wife and family not worth providing for? Is it fair to them to be the ones without? Is poverty really a sign of spirituality?

No.

Pastor, get a real job! If your church says you cannot get a second job let them know that is fine because it is soon to become your first job!

Be innovative and look for other ways to make money and when someone asks you “What's in your wallet” you can say, “Cash, NOT Capital One.”