Masters Of The Universe

Film Frown

Paul & Chris fill another request from our friend, and guest Daniel J. Hogan. Joining us on our quest to save Castle Grayskull are Arden and Jen. On this show we decide Superman hates whales. We puzzle over He-Man carrying a rifle. Sweat-filled boots make choreography difficult. This episode is 16 milliparsecs long, or something.

• Intros done in a bad commercials from the past style.
• Here come the 80s via Dan, “Where’s the beef?”, Reaganomics, and “Just Say No” with Clint Eastwood.
• This episode’s film stars Dolph Lundgren “and his nipples.”
• What’s Frank Langella doing in this picture?
• Oh hey! It’s the principal from Back to the Future, actor James Tolkan. He’s from Michigan like our hosts, slacker!
• Other stars are Meg Foster from They Live! Courteney Cox, Tom Paris from Star Trek: Voyager, Robert Duncan McNeill and our favorite Billy Barty.
• Dan tells us how DC’s New Gods may have influenced the film.
• What no sequel? No worries, we’ll just tweak the script. This is how we got the Van Damme film Cyborg.
• Arden was all about the character Teela because actress Chelsea Field was a Solid Gold dancer.
• Let’s forget about this awful film and watch The Toys That Made Us or Electric Boogaloo: The Wild, Untold Story of Cannon Films.
• He-Man is not allowed to kill people. So, we get to see storm troopers and lasers instead of swordplay or scary Legend characters.
• Is the slippery nipple named after Dolph?
• Speaking of our star, he is ACTING!
• Dan points out that Courteney Cox’s character is going to leave their small town and move to Jersey. He wonders if this is a Dancing in the Dark reference.
• Snap has the power, not He-Man.
• Here comes a She-Ra reboot by Noelle Stevenson of Lumberjanes fame.
• Synth music is the key to the universe! We know because we’ve watched a better movie, Close Encounters of the Third Kind.
• Oh no, Paul gets into his Southern lawyer, chauvinistic robot voice from our Starcrash episode.
• Skeletor has THE GLOW.
• Paul’s comment about “laser nipples” reminds Chris, about a certain music video. Yup, save yourself some time and watch this music video, it’s basically a 3 minute version of the film.
• The robots swear in Transformers The Movie.
• Avoid the Noid! Dan tells us the actor who played Saurod was the Noid.
• Pons Maar, the Noid, was also a puppeteer for Dinosaurs, a favorite for some on our panel.

That’s it for this episode, each of our wonderful guests put on their space thongs and rode off on their hover boards. Thanks to Jen, Dan, and Arden for such a fun time. And we’re grateful that you took the time to listen. Good Journey!

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