"Just Stop It" - A Marriage Masterclass with Dr. Scott Stanley

Mess and Meaning

Dr. Scott Stanley, one of the leading relationship and commitment experts in the world (and an overall groovy guy), packs this episode with research-based insights and time-tested advice from his more than 40 years in the field.
We also chat about septic tanks, little forks, and kitchen massages as we translate relationship science to real life.
Researchers have long known the hallmarks of happy marriages; unfortunately, a lot of us never got the memo...
Learn how to fight for your marriage - and when you need to "just stop it" - in this fun masterclass with my mentor and friend.
LISTEN IN AS WE EXPLORE:
1) three keys to successful relationships
2) four communication danger signs
3) the nature of commitment (dedication vs. constraints)
4) small sacrifices that make a big impact

LINKS + FOLLOW-UPS:

Check out Scott's bestselling book, Fighting For Your Marriage (4th ed. just released in Sept. 2024)

Learn more about his relationship education company, PREP, Inc., and their self-paced online program for couples - ePREP!
"When choosing a long-term partner, you will inevitably be choosing a particular set of unsolvable problems that you’ll be grappling with for the next ten, twenty or fifty years." -the late Dr. Dan Wile (founder and developer of Collaborative Couple Therapy)
Note: If you purchase the book using my Amazon affiliate link above, I may earn a small commission (at no extra cost to you). Links are provided for your convenience and help support the podcast.

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Looking for more ways to stay grounded in the good stuff?
Visit www.groundedingood.org for Dr. Kara's book, free newsletter, curated resources, and coaching offerings.
Disclaimer: This podcast is educational/preventive in nature and is NOT intended to be therapy. If you have relationship or mental health concerns, you can find qualified help on sites like BetterHelp or The Gottman Referral Network.
*Thanks to Alex Grohl for the intro/outro music.

Chapters

1. "Just Stop It" - A Marriage Masterclass with Dr. Scott Stanley (00:00:00)

2. Preview (00:00:01)

3. Podcast Intro (00:01:04)

4. Guest Intro (00:01:40)

5. 3 Keys to a Successful Relationship (00:02:45)

6. #1 Make it Safe to Connect (00:04:41)

7. Escalation (00:08:42)

8. Timeouts (00:11:34)

9. #2 Decide, Don't Slide (00:18:00)

10. #3 Do Your Part (00:26:50)

11. High-Frequency Problems + Communication (00:33:17)

12. Communication Danger Signs (00:39:15)

13. Invalidation (00:40:10)

14. Withdrawal and Avoidance (00:48:24)

15. Negative Interpretations (00:51:36)

16. Commitment and Sacrifice (00:59:05)

17. Small Things Challenge (01:10:00)

18. Final Thoughts (01:15:09)

19. Podcast Outro (01:15:56)