72. Sheila Wray Gregoire: The 47 Point Orgasm Gap

Pure Victory Podcast

Welcome to episode #72!
This week, Matt and Braden continue talking with renowned author, blogger and speaker, Sheila Wray Gregoire. In this episode they discuss why there is an orgasm gap between men and women, and how we need to change the way we think about sex for the better!

Frequency is not the issue
Often frequency is not the issue even though it has been advertised as such! Usually there are other dynamics at play, and these underlying factors are the real culprit as to why there may be sexual dissatisfaction. One example is the elevation of a man's desire for sex and the diminishing of a women's desire for sex. This can give a wife a bad taste in her mouth regarding sex and that negative outlook may lead to seeing sex as an obligatory act that won't be about her at all. Also, an orgasm for women is often seen as an afterthought or a bonus, but it is not a focal point. 1 Corinthians 7 implies that we should prioritize the woman's pleasure, not the man's.

Deconstruct all the negative messages around sex
Often the reasons for dissatisfaction with our sexual relationship in marriage stems from harmful and negative messaging. Women are often told that they have to be the "brakes" in sex as guys are seen as having an animalistic need that can't be controlled. With this messaging women feel obligated to meet a need but also to be more aware of their partner than their own body. This stops many women from being in tune with their own bodies and knowing what arouses them or feels good. As a result, sex is seen as one-sided. Men are told that they have needs that can't be controlled unless their wife helps them out, which makes sex out to be a self-focused endeavour for men, instead of one where they love their wife by working towards mutual gratification.

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Stay Tuned
Next week, Matt and Braden discuss the company and relationships that we keep, and how that can either help us or hinder us in getting healthy and free from porn!

Resources
Book: The Great Sex Rescue
Sheila Wray Gregoire's website
Bare marriage podcast
Pure Freedom Community for men 18+

Pure Freedom Journey for men and women

Book a FREE call (men)

Course for marriages

FamilyLife Canada: Resources and events to strengthen your marriage

Online marriage resources (FamilyLife Canada)

Covenant Eyes Accountability Software - use promo code RM30 for 30 days free

Podcast Hosts
BRADEN HAFNER

Braden is the Regional Director in Alberta for FamilyLife Canada. He has been married for 12 years to his wife Kristen, and they live in Edmonton, Alberta. He is passionate about seeing marriages grow and thrive, and helping couples move to a deeper oneness with one another and with God. FamilyLife Canada has a variety of resources and events to help you and your spouse take your marriage to the next level. See what would benefit you at www.familylifecanada.com

MATT CLINE

Matt and his wife Louise raise their little guys, David and Oliver, in Edmonton, Alberta. He is honored to do what he can to tackle the epidemic of pornography and sexual perversion in every way possible. Seeing lives and marriages get free and experience the love of God in profound ways is what drives him every day. He leads Restored Ministries, is a certified speaker and coach for the John Maxwell Team, and formerly played hockey in the WHL and for Hockey Canada. You can visit www.restoredministries.ca.