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Biting Our Tongues
Manage episode 290501019 series 2887232
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In today’s episode of Beyond Leaning In, we read an excerpt from the book where one of the characters finally speaks her mind about a topic concerning her new boss. To discuss this scene, we are joined by the producer of the show, Katie, and her sister Heather, who is the CEO of an engineering company in the railroad industry. As professional women, have they ever felt the need to bite their tongues? What’s their take on the topic? What does looking “professional” really mean to them? Please let us know which part of the book sparked conversation for you through our social media.
Welcome to BEYOND LEANING IN, a podcast designed to inspire candid discussion about gender gaps in the workplace. All too often, the “real talk” about the challenges that professional women face happens behind closed doors. Author Melanie Ho is on a mission to change that through her new book, BEYOND LEANING IN. She is joined in this podcast by co-host Carla Hickman as the two longtime friends discuss the ideas and research that inform Melanie’s book. You will also be invited to listen and join the conversation with early readers, women and men across generations and a wide range of professions, as they reflect, discuss and debate the ideas in the book.
Jump straight into:
(00:39) - Unexpected ideas: Biting your tongue - “There were themes that I had a rough sense I wanted to go through from the research, but there were also ideas that just kind of unexpectedly came up as I was writing.”
(04:02) - The new boss: Deborah’s conversation with Amber - “There was a sporadic pause in her step that Deborah couldn't help but notice. She'd seen it many times across her career. It was an indicator of a person who wanted to say something, but hadn't decided if they would, or not.”
(14:52) - Wrapping your comments in bubble wrap: Katie and Heather’s thoughts on speaking up - “You're going to be too strong or you're going to be too weak for not speaking out. It's a very fine line that women have to walk.”
(22:06) - Why do we hold our tongues? Praise or penalization - “Women and minorities get shut down so quickly. Like ‘nice story moving on’ and then you just learn to shut down.”
(25:35) - Walk in our shoes: Why men should read Beyond Leaning In - “I think that is a huge group of people that could be the change makers and that would benefit hugely from this book.”
(28:30) - Coming off “professional” in the workplace - “Our husbands just walk around being who they are, wherever they are. We walk around like ‘Okay, I am this person when I'm at work’.”
(32:04) - Doing things differently - “We need to work on these little boundaries, the microaggressions. How do we train our brains to not be biased in the way that we used to be.”
(36:43) - I don’t want to be THAT woman: Carla’s take on speaking up - “They don't want to be the woman who's raising all of the gender equity issues, because then that will be how they're defined rather than as being successful and effective.”
(41:01) - Reverse mentorship? How to listen to younger generations - “Reverse mentors can help because more junior staff are often closer to the line. They understand challenges that the executives may not see.”
Resources
Listen to the full Audiobook:Beyond Leaning In by Melanie Ho!
Get the book Beyond Leaning In by Melanie Ho
See and share Melanie’s 31 Days of #BeyondLeaningIn Webcomics
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