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Episode 10 - Step 6 - Denise and Jackie have a birthday!
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In this episode, Denise and Jackie celebrate a shared birthday (June 14) and reflect on the difference between having a birthday in your 30s vs. fifties. They discuss Step 6: “We trust that we will be guided to recognize thoughts and behaviors that no longer serve us, or the greater good,” which is about recognizing who you are in the world, in response — and sometimes in reaction — to the inventory list addressed and created during Step 5.
In the traditional 12 Step model, the 6th step is about becoming willing to change your life by acknowledging the cause(s) behind the patterns. In the 12 Steps for Everyone framework, this step is about the long game — you don’t need to fix it all at once. At the end of the day, mistakes are part of the human experience.. The key to Step 6 is honesty and clarity for the greater good.
From Denise’s perspective, Step 6 is about taking that inventory and being honest with yourself about how you show up in the world — something she is currently exploring in Cognitive Behavioral Therapy (CBT). In their conversation, Jackie explains why she doesn’t like “defects of character” in the original Step 6 language, and Denise compares Step 6 to being “in the gunk,” with a quote about holding on to a pattern and when it’s time to release it. Lastly, Denise and Jackie announce that they’re planning an LA in-person gathering (with digital access!) and they confirm that a workbook is coming into fruition.
Topics Covered:
- Denise and Jackie’s shared birthday (June 14) — and what Jackie’s 30th birthday represents
- Rewriting Step 6 and unpacking the phrase “defects of character”
- The connection between your physical stuff and not being your highest and best self
- An upcoming summer gathering in Los Angeles - send us your recommendations below!
- Why Jackie feels pressure to complete the steps on a certain timeline
Resources Mentioned:
- A Year Through The Steps Resource
- The Gentle Art of Swedish Death Cleaning Book
- A Woman’s Way Through The Twelve Steps Book
- On Our Best Behavior: The Seven Deadly Sins and the Price Women Pay to Be Good Book
- Event space recommendations: Send us a message on Instagram or email us
- Find a Twelve Step group near you
Follow Us:
- Follow Jackie: jackiefreed.la
- Follow Denise: @denise.freed
- Follow us on Instagram: @12stepsforeveryone
- Follow us on TikTok: @12stepsforeveryone
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