Ep 20 - High Anxiety

The DNA of Mindful Relationships

Intro: Are there times when you feel anxious, worried or stressed and don't know how to help yourself feel better? Or does your partner have similar anxious episodes and you're at a loss as to how to support them? Anxiety: A feeling of apprehension and fear, characterized by physical symptoms such as heart palpitations, sweating, and feelings of stress. Anxiety is more than just worry or stress, which is a common feeling that we all feel. In the absence of an actual life event that creates fear or apprehension, It can be an indicator that something is not quite right. It's really appropriate to have anxiety symptoms before you give a presentation at work, particularly if its something you don't do that often. Is it within the realms of normal to have anxiety symptoms when there is nothing external to you to trigger that response and it happens quite regularly? No, this is often a sign that you have shifted into the realm of an anxiety disorder. How do people express their anxiety? •People express their anxiety in many different ways. Some people become withdrawn and quiet. They prefer their own company to that of others. •Some people get so anxious that it comes out in irritability and verbal attacks on others. •Some people get very needy and cling to their loved ones for comfort and security. Ways to Manage your own anxiety. •The first step is recognise it for what it is. Notice what happens in your body when you are feeling anxious. It will be different for everybody: •is your chest feeling tight •is your throat feeling dry •is their discomfort in your stomach •are you developing a headache or migraine •are you feeling tense in your neck and shoulders •is your heart racing •are your hands sweaty •are you sleeping too much or not getting enough sleep •eating more than usual or eating very little •The quickest and easiest thing you can do next is to notice your breath. Your breath is always with you. This quickly re-focuses the brain onto a present moment reality. The here and now. There rae many different types of deep breathing techniques and I'll name a couple. The first I call 4,5,6 breathing. Another is 7/11. •Once you've done some breathing and IF you are aware of the trigger or cause of the anxiety symptoms. Examine your thoughts around the worry. Start writing them down so you can understand them better. You cannot manage something you don't acknowledge. IF you can't identify the triggers and everything •Re-engage the logical and adult part of your brain. Our anxiety thought come from a very young part of ourselves that is very black and white, right or wrong and does not allow for grey areas. For example, if your fear is about going to a party or event and that everyone will be staring at you. One of the most powerful questions you can ask yourself is "Can you be certain its true?" when you really think about it that way you quickly realise that everyone at the party is most likely focussed on their own conversation with the person in front of them and not about you walking in. Don't always believe your thoughts as being true. Question them constantly. Is it really true ? •Distractions are another way to consciously guide the mind away from the anxiety provoking thoughts and onto something else. This could be listening to soothing music, reading a book, watching a movie, learning a new skill, having a massage, drawing. You have to find what works for you as some activities can allow your mind to wonder which can exacerbate the negative thoughts. •Exercise and movement is one of the most underrated forms of anxiety reduction. A 20 - 3...