EP 70: Getting out of Shame and Into Power with Kelly Diels

The Unburdened Leader

We need to talk about power.

Like, get into the nitty gritty details on what we believe about power, how we move around power, and how we see ourselves in relationship to power.

We need to get really clear on how we define it so we can truly understand the impact that our definitions of power have on our beliefs and actions.

There are too many examples of people in power who still have a dated and toxic view of power while others struggle to see themselves as powerful.

Our relationship to power impacts our choices, as children, when we set out to have careers, and in our relationships with others.

My guest today showed me how we–especially those who identify as women–have a harder time embracing power versus empowerment and how our incomplete definitions of power welcome the more palatable empowerment lens, but fear or reject the true roots of empowerment.

Kelly Diels is a thinker, teacher, and "development coach for culture makers".

Over the last 10 years, she has worked with NY Times best-selling authors, national and international feminist organizations, and thousands of online entrepreneurs. Her research & frameworks are designed to help you get out of shame and into power — so you can make the difference you’re dreaming of in your business, in your life, and in our wider culture. Her approach is grounded in her training as a political theorist and feminist theorist. She is the first in her family to graduate from university. Parenting five children who are black has given Kelly a ringside seat for the bias, discrimination, and harassment they live with on a daily basis — and the anger, anguish, and grief drives her to use whatever resources she has to change our cultural systems.

Listen to the full episode to hear:

• Unpacking the difference between empowerment and power, and why we need to embrace generative, skilled forms of power in our lives
• How to begin reclaiming power from what others have shamed in you
• Why changing your relationship to shame and power is more than an individualistic mindset problem
• How Kelly’s changing relationship to power and systemic injustice impacted her relationships
• What it means to an intentional, deliberate culture maker
• How Kelly has flipped “high maintenance” into a positive asset that helps her uphold her standards and boundaries

Learn more about Kelly Diels:

• Website
• Instagram: @kelly.diels
• Subscribe to the Sunday Love Letter

Learn more about Rebecca:

• rebeccaching.com
• Work With Rebecca
• Sign up for the weekly Unburdened Leader Email

Resources:

• Architectural Digest
• Panic! At The Disco - “High Hopes"
• Succession
• Dirty Dancing