[coaching] Shijia on asking for and dealing with feedback in science careers

Bold Adulting - Courage in the face of self doubt

Shijia gets help on her confidence as it relates to doing science/grad school in a non-native language, asking for feedback, and comfort interacting with men as a result of cultural upbringing.

• Homework: Ask for feedback
• • Tip: Ask for 1 thing you did well and 1 thing you did better (to avoid receiving the “It was good but…” structure of feedback)
  • Tip: If it’s written feedback, read it while you’re well-rested and relaxed (if possible)
• Tip: Prepare for but don’t avoid awkwardness
• Growth mindset: don’t feel limited by the skills you currently have
• • My late grandpa Yuriy had this, as he spoke to Americans even when he wasn’t fluent after we moved to the US from Russia. I recently found an amazing home video of him telling a joke in English, making people erupt in laughter, and then being delighted that he was understood
• Homework: List the benefits of the struggles and learning opportunities you’ve had. Examples:
• • Having English as a 2nd language can provide skills for then learning the language of science
  • Having to work while in college teaches organizing, prioritizing, multitasking, whatever skills that job required, and is actually better than having a resume that has only education
• Homework: Mindfulness (letting thoughts slip away)
• • Tip: Avoiding Pink Elephants (think of a better thought to replace an unhelpful thought pattern, as just trying to avoid thoughts tends to reinforce them
  • Tip: Track unhelpful thoughts by moving pennies from one pocket to another or by using a tally
• Tip: Defer anxiety to a later point
• Christy Harrison’s Intuitive Eating Fundamental Class (a mini course is available) and Food Psych podcast
• Tip: Use Masterminds (feedback groups) for making progress on research projects or anything else you’re trying to get done

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Host: Masha Evpak

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