#101 - What to Do When Loved Ones Don't Wear a Face Mask (Pandemic Episodes)

Beyond Bitchy: Mastering the Art of Boundaries

Has someone close to you made the decision not to wear a face mask? I experienced this recently, and I know that many of you have faced this issue as well. Today’s episode is dedicated to the topic. To help you understand how you can respond to this situation, I’ll walk you through exactly what I did and said, how it turned out, and the choices you can make when you find yourself in a similar position.

And a quick announcement: I’ll be holding another amazing live video call — Clarity Circle — on Friday, August 14th. Learn more sign up at this link!

Biggest Takeaways From Episode #101:

• Should we wear a face mask even though they aren’t 100% effective? The fact is that 100% is not a metric we expect when dealing with situations affecting our safety. We make choices all the time around things that aren’t 100% effective, such as locking our doors at night, wearing seatbelts, and even using contraceptives.
• You can use the 5-Step Boundary Solution process to help you navigate situations in which someone close to you doesn’t wear a face mask.
• As you apply your new skills in situations like this, part of your work is to stay on your side of the street and maintain a respectful, warm connection with the other person. If you’re very triggered, it may help to express that you’re feeling that way and that you’d like to have some time and talk about it later.
• In the end, you get to be the decider and figure out what works for you and how to move forward.

Highlights from Episode #101:

• Vicki welcomes listeners to today’s episode and introduces its topic. She also reminds listeners about her 30-day Facebook Live event. [00:39]
• We hear about a recent experience that Vicki had involving face masks, as well as the recent hype in the news about face masks. [02:21]
• If masks aren’t 100% effective, does that mean we should just skip wearing them? [07:54]
• Vicki talks about what to do when a loved one doesn’t or won’t wear a mask, and shares more about her recent experience. [10:30]
• Vicki walks listeners through what she ended up doing in her encounter with someone close to her not wearing a mask. [18:47]
• We hear about how Vicki focused on knowing who this person is at heart, and some examples of her friend's self-described “paranoia.” [26:10]
• Vicki confesses another part of her response, which she isn’t as proud of. We also learn how the woman in question eventually responded. [30:08]
• The strength of Vicki’s strategy is that she left the “problem” to the other woman; she didn’t make a request or create a power struggle. [34:55]
• Have you ever picked up a new set of skills and then started using them to control, manipulate, or dominate? [43:47]
• Vicki points out that you ultimately get to be the decider to figure out how to move forward, and talks about a key factor that hangs people up around seeing their options. [46:26]

Links and Resources:

• Vicki Tidwell Palmer
• Vicki Tidwell Palmer on Facebook
• Moving Beyond Betrayal by Vicki Tidwell Palmer
• 5-Step Boundary Solution Clarifier
• Vicki Tidwell Palmer on Instagram
• The Radiant Threefold Path
• Laura Doyle
• Pia Mellody
• Clarity Circle
• Beyond Bitchy Podcast | Episode #1 – Boundaries: What They Are and Why They’re So Misunderstood (start here and work your way forward for the foundations of this podcast!)