We conclude our diversion into the story-telling capabilities of Joris with his description of the Valkyries from the Norse tradition. Transcription of Joris: The daughters of Asgard, angelic gatherers of dead men. Flying with their winged steeds over battlefields and singing godly melodies. Godly I say! What other melodies are there for goddesses.…

In episode 19, we continue with another story excerpted from Joris' Sermon on Familiar Stories. This time, we examine his retelling of the Trojan War. Transcription of Joris: Imagine instead that your daughter's liquid insides were spread upon an altar to Poseidon, and imagine the aspect of your wife's, the queen's, face as you dedicated this sacri…

Returning in spite of ourselves, we revisit a sermon once excerpted upon the request of our listeners. In this excerpt, we hear Joris' rendition of a well-loved tale. Transcription of Joris: Who were they? These pigs. These lightly-haired construers of architectural ingenuity and manufacturers of inhabitable poetry? They were a brotherhood, and it …

We take a break from Joris this week for another display of Philip's musical genius.By Joris Planck

For our first livecast, we will be hearing Joris' idea of how heaven looks. Unfortunately, our question and answer session is cut short due to unseen circumstances. Transcription of Joris: I am frequently asked by those seeking inspiration about what sort of landscapes I believe heaven and hell to be. The simplest answer would be to describe them a…

In the concluding episode of our 2-part special on Joris Planck's "Sermon on Passion and Consequence," we hear a story of captivating pathos told by our beloved Chief Zealot. Transcription of Joris: The Maple was not always Maple to the Cedar. At one point, the two looked upon each other and saw no difference. ’Twas a love marked by rapture and moi…

This week's episode will be the first of two excerpts taken from Joris Planck's "Sermon on Passion and Consequence." Part I will address Passion. It should help us come to new knowledge about the human experience. Transcription of Joris: "I have no measurable love for man or woman. I've barely love for myself, save that particular sort of love that…

The choice of clip for Episode 13 was inspired by the heat we're feeling at the moment. It certainly has made all us here feel a combined sensation of discomfort and irritation. In the clip, Joris attempts to join in local festivities, only to be disillusioned by its philosophical shortcomings. Transcription of Joris: "What a hateful object, the su…

Episode 12 returns to our favorite chief zealot. As per a listener request, we will be sampling one of his more simple arguments for examination. In it, Joris weighs the need to identify as one particular animal or another—to shocking results. Transcription of Joris: "I used to think poorly of those who considered themselves either a dog person or …

Episode 11 will provide us with a momentary break from our beloved Joris Planck, to give our minds a moment to breathe. Instead, we will be sharing an a cappella creation by Philip that should inspire both terror and joy in us.By Joris Planck

Episode 10 will showcase one of Joris' invocations that sporadically appear within his sermons. His "Invocation to Polyhymnia" is both a poem and an act of devotion to the muse of meditation, pantomime, and eloquence. Transcription of Joris: "I sing the praise of Polyhymnia: Dame most dower, dame of word and dance, Who has the cheeks of cherubs and…

Episode 9 gives us insight into Joris Planck's belief in the gods of mythology. The excerpt is taken from his "Sermon on Familiar Stories," which tackles the epic task of weaving together every story under the sun. Transcription of Joris: "I wonder, should we maintain a perverse belief in these gods of old once sung of in metered hymn and marbled r…

Episode 8 excerpts a moment from Joris Planck's "Sermon on Companionship," wherein he considers how much time he wastes. We'll be challenged to decide if we, the listeners, aren't somehow implicated in his metaphors. Transcription of Joris: "Watching my chickens, the overbearing gravity of wasted time oppresses me. Then again, seeing anything overw…

Episode 7 showcases a passage from one of Joris Planck's many sermons on aesthetics. Joris asks himself if his art is bettered or worsened by education. Transcription of Joris: "Sometimes I wish that I were a precocious practitioner of aesthetics able to justify having never enrolled in university or having ever proffered an art debased by learning…

Episode 6 presents us with a second clip from Joris Planck's early work, the "Sermon on Strolling." In this passage, he recounts a story wherein he adopted a practice of walking in a group. Transcription of Joris: "I have of late partaken in a procession of playfully costumed and coiffured paraders, who on occasion flood my street in a monsoon of p…

In episode 5, we hear the first of 2 clips from Joris Planck's "Sermon on Strolling." We hope to shine some light on what Joris thought when he took walks. Transcription of Joris: "My friends, by which I mean my thoughts suggest leaving my incommodious apartment to visit some public venue or market square. Where wears are whimsically strung betwixt…

In episode 4, we hear a clip from Joris Planck's "Sermon on Natural Philosophy." In it, Joris seems to waver on his opinions of science and what it "offers." Transcription of Joris: "Why should I care for the sciences, which blast my otherwise illiterate hours with images and scream light upon my gloom. And what of this tedious landscape it propose…

In episode 3, we will hear a passage from Joris Planck's "Sermon on Whimsy." Plus, we will hear some feedback from you our listeners! Transcription of Joris: "Sometimes I imagine myself some relation of mercurial puck. Perhaps a melancholy uncle who delights not in faerie politics, but the gainful exploitation of their eldritch pastimes of counting…

In episode 2, we will hear a passage from Joris Planck's "Sermon on Respiration." I hope to provide some pragmatic insight into this passage, but I wouldn't hold your breath if I were you. Transcription of Joris: "Grim, grim, and ever grimmer grow the weary days as they assault me with their vulgar passings. And with them go all hope of ever catchi…

For this inaugural episode, we hear a sample from the "Sermon on Ethical Action" Transcription of Joris: "Do not envy the trees. They are forced to share the company of other trees indiscriminately. A neighborhood of stoic monoliths, a cathedral teeming with wooden clerics. Notwithstanding the lurid nakedness of their boughs in drearier months, the…