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The Enneagram and Marriage Podcast, hosted by Christa Hardin, MA, is rooted in two decades of experience counseling and coaching couples. On top of her expert marriage advice, Christa uses the Enneagram to add another layer of understanding in how we work as individuals and gives us deeper insight into how we connect and shine together in marriage and relationships across the collective community.
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The Enneagram isn't just about understanding personality types; it's a pathway to healing and growth. Our tagline, "The Enneagram doesn't define you, but it does bring restoration," encapsulates our philosophy. While offering valuable insights, it doesn't confine us to rigid categories; it empowers self-awareness and transformation. Join us as we explore how this system reshapes thinking and habits, guiding you toward fulfillment. Dive into insightful discussions, expert interviews, and prac ...
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Cultivate the Ordinary

Travis and Jessie Vangsnes

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The great writer Walker Percy gifted the world with an inspiring and thought provoking line with his words: "Consciously cultivate the ordinary." So many of us today find ourselves living in a foggy and disorienting world where we are held captive to hectic schedules, polarizing news narratives, and our addiction to technology. We find ourselves continuously battling things like isolation, anxiety, fear, boredom, and apathy. What if instead of being held captive we could find ourselves capti ...
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Love Thinks Podcast

Dr. John Van Epp + Dr. Morgan Cutlip

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Join two relationship experts and a father-daughter team, Dr. John Van Epp and Dr. Morgan Cutlip, as they take on real relationship questions and deliver practical guidance with actionable advice—all in short, digestible episodes. Their books and relationship courses have empowered millions of singles, couples, and parents to follow their hearts without losing their minds.
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In this episode, Christa Hardin (MA Counseling) joins Travis and Jess again to talk marriage and ways we can become healthier as individuals and within our marriages. Christa helps us unpack what healthy boundaries are, how to establish them for ourselves, for our marriages, and finally in community. Cultivating the ordinary in marriage happens in …
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Welcome back to another season of Enneagram Restored Podcast! I have the pleasure of sitting down to have a conversation with my good friend Adam Kennedy (3) to kick this new season. Listen in on our conversation as we talk about waiting which is the theme for this season of the podcast. Follow Enneagram Restored Podcast on Social Media: Instagram:…
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It feels so good to be known and seen for who we are, as well as to have clarified spaces from which to grow. To this end, today’s special shorter episode is a walk-through of the Enneagram type Fours and who they are, as well as who they can become as they walk toward health. If you're a Four, learn how to become the healthiest version of yourself…
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In this episode, Travis and Jess are joined by Sarah and Jared McCrory to talk about everything from soul care to seeking the easy yoke of Jesus to discovering new purpose and taking courageous risks of faith. They tell relatable stories of wrestling with the trap of a faith identity rooted in performance for God instead of resting in our belovedne…
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Today, we get to chat with Chris and Jenny Graebe (7w8 and 1w9 pairing) about how they slow down to create healthy rhythms for their marriage and for a healthy, intentional life of love and faith with their five kids. They also share from both their first book together, 📖 The Rhythm of Us, and their brand new book, The Rhythm of Home as well. They …
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It feels so good to be known and seen for who we are, as well as to have clarified spaces from which to grow. To this end, today’s special shorter episode is a walk-through of the Enneagram type Fives and who they are, as well as who they can become as they walk toward health. If you're a Five, learn how to become the healthiest version of yourself…
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In this episode, Travis and Jess are joined by pastor and ministry leader Rusty McKie to talk about his upcoming book releasing July 16th, pre-order here: The Art of Stability: How Staying Present Changes Everything Available on Amazon (Digital only) Rusty is an author, pastor, trauma informed coach, and spiritual director. He's a contributor to th…
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Do you feel like you have a lot of work goals but can't seem to accomplish anything in the allotted time your day actually gives you? Do you feel frenetic because you're trying to do a good job at work but then your family life, not to mention your marriage or life with God, is majorly lacking? There are so many shifts we can make as humans, and ea…
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It feels so good to be known and seen for who we are, as well as to have clarified spaces from which to grow. To this end, today’s special shorter episode is a walk-through of the Enneagram type Sixes and who they are, as well as who they can become as they walk toward health. If you're a Six, learn how to become the healthiest version of yourself …
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I want to say thank you to all of the guests who are helping me make this season of Enneagram Restored Podcast possible! Episode 1 premieres June 27th at 10:30AM CST. ——— * Help grow the podcast: enneagramrestored.com/tipjar * Download free resources: enneagramrestored.com/free * Follow the podcast: instagram.com/enneagramrestoredpodcast…
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In this episode, Travis interviews Jess about her journey of helping people find wholeness and healing in their lives. As an artist, Jess has a great gift of seeing possibility and beauty in places others may not. Her deep compassion and empathy for others, coupled with her hopeful and creative idealism, make her really skilled in helping people fi…
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As Tolkien once said, "Not all who wander are lost," and you will be even less relationally lost as you wander into learning with E + M about the ins and outs of traveling with your spouse and/or family and friends! Take some time today to invest in the tips in this episode from travel expert and geographer Angela Gilmeister, Type 1 (Wild Hair Trav…
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It feels so good to be known and seen for who we are, as well as to have clarified spaces from which to grow. To this end, today’s special shorter episode is a walk-through of the Enneagram type Seven and who they are, as well as who they can become as they walk toward health. If you're a Seven, learn how to become the healthiest version of yoursel…
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When infidelity wounds a couple, in the wise words of our guest today, Dr. Harrison Scott Key, Ph.D, best-selling author and the winner of the Thurber Prize for American Humor, there's a marriage murder mystery to be solved: Who killed this marriage, is it really dead, and can it come back to life? Join us for a riveting and deep-diving episode wit…
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It feels so good to be known and seen for who we are, as well as to have clarified spaces from which to grow. To this end, today’s special shorter episode is a walk-through of the Enneagram type Eight and who they are, as well as who they can become as they walk toward health. If you're an Eight, learn how to become the healthiest version of yourse…
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In this episode, Travis and Jess are joined by Christa Hardin (MA Counseling) to talk marriages and relationships. She brings wise perspective on the various stages of marriages and speaks into the common reality of so many couples feeling they have lost their glow, or spark. Using a mountain analogy, she walks us through the basics needs of relati…
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What a necessity it is to have great tools to process our conflict and trauma together in marriage, parenting, and relationships, and yet often in the moments of great felt threat or pain, our very bodies rise up in protective styles, even possibly blocking us from doing this work. Today we get to talk about bodywork or somatics and to learn some h…
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It feels so good to be known and seen for who we are, as well as to have clarified spaces from which to grow. To this end, today’s special shorter episode is a walk-through of the Enneagram type Nine and who they are, as well as who they can become as they walk toward health. If you're a Nine, learn how to become the healthiest version of yourself …
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In this episode, professional artist Tamara Brown joins Travis and Jess and shares her inspiring story of becoming a self-made artist and entrepreneur after leaving the corporate world. Her unlikely journey led her to gaining a licensed partnership in 2011 with a major national greeting card company and her designs were featured on cards in Walmart…
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May is mental health month, a time dedicated to bringing awareness to those struggling or wondering what may be going on with them on days when you feel less healthy. On today’s podcast, we are statistically shedding some light on which mental health struggles each type has significantly reported, including depression, anxiety, ADD, neurodivergence…
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So many times we relate with characters in a song or media outlet and we don’t get to process them further. Today you have a chance to do this with Christa and guest Dana Lawson, Enneagram 9 (9-4 pairing) as they walk through This is Us with you! Join Christa and Dana with a cup of coffee or tea for a meaningful chat as we discuss the Pearson famil…
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In this episode, Travis and Jess talk all things foster care in light of May being National Foster Care Awareness Month. They both work for the national org, America's Kids Belong whose mission is to improve the outcomes and experiences for kids in foster care. Travis and Jess are former foster and adoptive parents and are very passionate in helpin…
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It can be so hard deciphering what your God-given dream is and then trying to get the steps just right, especially when you’re in the throes of motherhood or another busy season of life. Today we are joined by author and Enneagram 3w2 (3-6 pairing), Becky Kiser to talk about how she has learned to stop striving to slow down and listen with discernm…
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Happy Mother's Day to you and yours! In this Mother's Day week coffee chat with Christa and her dear friend of over twenty years, artist Alisa Taylor type 9, we both celebrate the gift of mom friends as well as discuss ways we can serve our children the very best nourishment across all levels of their emotional, spiritual, mental, and physical pala…
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We often find ourselves struggling when we have a spouse with a different way of solving conflict than we have. Today we talk about having conflict with our passionate 4s (artists) 6s (loyalists) and 8s (protectors) and what we can each to do find not only common ground but also passionate, enduring love! Don't forget! Mother's Day is coming! Get y…
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Travis and Jess are joined by Michelle Wegner to discuss the topic of beauty. They talk about beauty and its relationship to God, our souls, and why we need beauty in our lives. There's a fascinating connection between beauty, grace, and truth that the three also discuss. As the Benedictines say, "Beauty is truth shining into being." Michelle serve…
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Across the personality spectrum, we each offer different giftings, and Type Threes offer us the reminder of holy Hope - the reminder that the race is not over even when it's hard or even if it feels like a marathon. Today we are given hope today afresh as we are joined by author, pastor, and founder of Sandals Church, Matthew Stephen Brown, Enneagr…
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Many of us long to escape our difficult lives and the contexts we live in. We wish we could see things with the joy and child like wonder we used to have. Marcel Proust once said, "The real voyage of discovery consists not in seeking new landscapes but in having new eyes." Travis and Jess discuss the things that cloud our eyesight and what it means…
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Many couples are frustrated by differing conflict styles and miss getting to resolution because of it. In this mini-episode, Christa assesses how to deal with conflict with someone who is positively-wired in the 2 (the Giver), 7 (the Enthusiast), or 9 (the Peacemaker) personality spaces. In this mini-episode Christa gives both general and type-spec…
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How much emotional pain do couples have to endure before making the healthy changes that often feel so scary to initiate? This is a question many need to ask themselves since it's so vulnerable to break deep patterns of trauma together. Today Christa helps you to work through toxic relationship patterns with London-based psychotherapist and influen…
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On this special surprise mini-episode for Swiftie fans and for inquiring minds otherwise, Christa takes you on a journey of finding ways through pain to post-traumatic growth, analyzing through the lens of The Tortured Poet's Department Album (TTPD) from Taylor Swift. Join us for therapeutic lessons, fun, and a few meaningful takeaways for healthy …
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In this episode, Travis and Jess engage with Bob Harding on a fun and lively conversation around seeing the world and finding meaning in our stories through quotes. Bob is the pastor at CrossLife Church in Spartanburg, SC. He wrote the foreword to Travis' book Shiny Eyes: Seeing Better Through the Lenses of Joy, Tears, Beauty, and Hope. He and Trav…
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How do you go from busy and overloaded to present in marriage and family, especially when we know that "turning towards" behaviors are what make relationships succeed or fail long-term, especially when we differ SO much after a long span of time together in marriage? As we strive to connect in a truly frenetic world when we have so much to do along…
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So many couples hold secrets from one another, but it's not healthy for either of you and you're not likely to tell one another the truth if you don't feel safe. Today we're joined by Laurie Gerber, Type 6 (6-2 pairing) who tells us how she worked from struggle to truth and freedom in her own marriage and gives you tangible tips to thrive from a pl…
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In this episode, bi-vocational pastor, Jeremy Sparks joins Travis on a thought provoking conversation around Jeremy's unique vantage of seeing the world through the lenses of being both a pastor and firefighter. These two roles remind Jeremy everyday just how fleeting life is. The two discuss Jeremy's vision and heart for the church he planted 10 y…
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Whether at home or the office, your work life is an enormous part of the day and deserves rich contemplation and optimization. Today Christa invites you to a conversation to greatly benefit you by bringing joy into your work rhythms by discovering your own Enneagram intelligence, emotional, and instinctual work strengths and areas for growth. With …
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Each of us needs to understand the other in conflict and yet our personalities get in the way. This listener-requested episode helps you to walk through conflict with those people with temperaments who do not show as much emotion and/or prefer to solve problems logically or linearly. You'll learn ways you can develop a healthier internal narrative …
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In this episode, Travis and Jess talk all facets of hospitality with their friend and President of the Soul Care Institute, Kaylene Derksen. There's plenty of laughs at the outset as the conversation steers around Northern accents, cows, and reminiscing about growing up on farms in the upper Midwest. Kaylene and her husband Jimm are gifted in the a…
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Troubleshooting your life and intimacy stresses also includes understanding the rhythms of your own unique sensory up and down regulating at work and in your marriage dance as well! If you want to truly ignite your love and work in the best ways possible, you’ll pay attention to these rhythms and honor each precious week across the month for what i…
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Often, couples are too uncomfortable to ask their pastor or marriage counselor about how to build their love life in marriage in the areas of not just building attraction and desire and also how to successfully approach sexual arousal and resolution, especially since statistically women experience about half the full sexual arousal as compared to m…
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Travis and Jess host Steve Smith again in this part 2 episode, where they talk about the ministry of spiritual direction. At its core, spiritual direction is about companioning with someone who helps discern where God has been and is at work in one's life through intentional listening and prayer. It's really less about "direction" and more about be…
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Rest is the most underused, safe, and chemical-free alternative to relieve stress, and it's about way more than just sleep. Today we cover seven different kinds of rest you need with our esteemed guest author, researcher, and physician, Dr. Sandra Dalton-Smith, MD, Enneagram 3 (as featured on TedX, CNN, Fox, MSNBC), to tell us how we can and must g…
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As you aim for a healthy and loving sexual intimacy life in your marriage, in this second installment of the Igniting Your SX Instinct Series of the Enneagram and Marriage podcast, we're not only discussing what attracts us to one another and what builds our love and chemistry up, but also about what builds desire biologically, psychologically, and…
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In this episode, Travis and Jess interview their good friend and mentor Steve Smith. After years of relentlessly chasing the intoxication of results and "success" in ministry as a pastor, Steve was beyond burnout at a large church in 1996. It was then that he received the life giving guidance and soul care direction from his mentor, Dallas Willard …
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Right now in our highly curated culture, individuals are desperately seeking authenticity, depth, and understanding together. This is because we all need connection as we process hard pieces of life and grief together if we want joy, love, and laughter to genuinely emerge from a healthy space. To tackle this huge topic with joy and depth both, Chri…
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Marriages are often broken down by unhealthy sexual intimacy triggers and practices and in your quest to get healthy intimately together in your sexual instincts, you need to address your connection from a foundation of goodness. In this new E + M Series, you'll learn to connect through intimacy that starts with foreplay both outside and inside of …
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In this episode, Travis and Jess engage their friend Serena Salmans on a conversation that centers around joy and contentment through tragedy and adversity. Serena suffered a traumatic brain injury in high school and talks about dramatically feeling God's providence and presence in the midst of those hard days. They also talk about foster care and …
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Though compassion and gentleness are wonderful traits, when these traits are paired with codependency, enabling, and a lack of healthy boundaries, vulnerable individuals, namely empaths, often repeat familiar trauma cycles by pairing with a mate who has high narcissism markers in relationships, sometimes even pathologically so. This high tolerance …
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In this just-for-fun E + M on Spring break episode, we ask you to kick back and enjoy a relaxed and endearing episode as we discuss the enemies-to-lovers trope of Jane Austen's Pride and Prejudice as well as what types we think the most romantic couple of all time are, Mr. Darcy and Elizabeth Bennet. Don’t miss this chance to explore the hilarious …
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