I promise you, you're not a weak-willed loser with no self-control. There are a lot of reasons why we can't control the way we drink- trauma, lack of coping skills, stress, anger, anxiety. Plus, as you'll learn in my podcast, alcohol takes advantage of our vulnerabilities to hook us, then it changes our brains to keep us stuck and reliant on alcohol. It's not about willpower. In the Sober Powered Podcast, I use science, psychology, and compassion to help you understand why you use self-destr ...
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E230: 11 Tips to Quit Drinking in Dry July
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Getting started is the hardest part. What are you supposed to do with your time? How do you get through the first week? In this episode I’ll cover 11 tips to help you succeed in Dry July. E190: NA Drinks: the pros and cons Quit drinking course for Dry July on Sober Powered Skills Sober Support: Community & Meetings: Living a Sober Powered Life http…
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E229: 5 Mindset Shifts to Help You Stay Sober (That Aren’t Stupid)
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Our thoughts create our reality. For most of my life I thought that I had bad luck and bad things kept happening to me, but in sobriety I realized I had very toxic thinking. When something happens to us, we assign meaning to it and that meaning can create issues. It’s important to learn how to adjust your perspective. In this episode I will cover 5…
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E228: Why Alcohol Automatically Captures and Holds Your Attention
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If you’ve stopped drinking, have you noticed that when you walk into a room your eyes immediately go to where the alcohol is? Or how you keep track of how quickly everyone is drinking and what drink they’re on without any effort? Or how you never realized how much people in TV shows and movies drink until now? This is because alcohol can capture an…
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E227: You Need a Goal (200 lb Deadlift Achieved!)
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Let's talk about goal setting and building self-confidence. You've probably heard me mention off and on that I've had this goal to deadlift 200 lbs. I just achieved it. If you can stay put for a short story about my deadlift, then I promise I have a point. I want to get into goal setting, how to determine what your goal should even be, and what thi…
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Many of us use alcohol to turn off our brain, escape our problems, or check out, but escapism is actually associated with more intense drinking and lower life satisfaction. In this episode you’ll learn about the different theories behind escapism, why we’re doing this, and how it makes our problems worse. I hope that this episode can help you make …
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E225: 5 Strategies for Dealing with Relapses and Getting Back on Track
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What causes a relapse? How can we recognize it and make changes before we actually relapse? In this episode I’ll discuss the path to relapse and what is going on. Whether you relapsed or want to be vigilant in case you relapse or get weird thoughts, then you’ll learn about denial, low insight, not being ready to quit, and 5 strategies to deal with …
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E224: Alcohol Makes Your Brain Stop Working
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Your brain has to be connected well to be able to work. We beat ourselves up because we know we shouldn’t drink, but then we do, or because we keep convincing ourselves it’ll be different this time, even though it’s never different. It’s easy to think this is because you’re a weak-willed loser with no self-control, but it’s just not true. In this e…
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E223: 6 Common Triggers for Drinking and How to Avoid Them
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There are triggers to drink everywhere, but I’ve seen 6 common ones that mess up people’s attempts to get sober. In this episode I’ll explain what these are and how you can start dealing with them. I’m going to start our discussion with a personal lesson I learned about giving up when things get hard. We also need to learn how to push through disco…
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E222: 6 Neurotransmitters That Get Messed Up By Alcohol
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Glutamate, GABA, Dopamine, Norepinephrine, Serotonin, and the whole HPA axis (stress response). These are some of the important systems in your brain that get messed up when you blast your brain with alcohol all the time. Then when we quit drinking, these get even more messed up. In this episode you’ll learn what these 6 do, how alcohol messes them…
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E221: 5 Ways to Redefine Fun Without Alcohol
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Alcohol is marketed as a key to relaxation and fun. Ads and movies show us that alcohol is essential for social bonding and carefree moments, signaling us that a drink in hand is your ticket to fun and connection. Then when we start to notice our drinking is problematic and think about how we may have to get sober, one of the first things we panic …
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E220: The Hippocampus and Alcohol: Blackouts, Memory Deficits, and Learned Associations
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The hippocampus is an important part of the brain, which is unfortunately very vulnerable to alcohol. It is most well-known for its role in blackouts, but damage to the hippocampus from our drinking can cause problems with everyday memory too, like telling someone the same story over and over again. The hippocampus has a lesser known, but very impo…
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E219: 7 Healthy Lifestyle Changes to Support Your Sobriety
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Our lifestyle can make our sobriety easier or harder. When we quit drinking, things have to change. We can’t keep coming home to the same old routine but just not drink. In this episode I’ll explain 7 lifestyle changes that you can make overtime to support your sobriety and why these changes are helpful. What to listen to next: E188: wellness over …
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E218: In the Moment Craving vs Constant Craving
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There are 2 types of alcohol cravings that you may experience as you quit drinking: sudden, in the moment cravings or constant all day cravings. In this episode, you’ll learn about both types and 3 reasons we crave alcohol. I’ve experienced both types of cravings so I will share my experience and help you understand why you keep craving alcohol and…
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E217: Warm Weather: 3 Reasons We Think Alcohol is Required
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The weather is getting warmer and we start thinking about how everyone’s going to be on the porch or at restaurants drinking, how nice that looks, and how left out we feel for not participating. It’s normal to see other people drinking and wish you could do it too. In this episode we’ll talk about 3 reasons why we think alcohol is required when the…
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E216: 4 Types of Impulsivity: Which One Are You?
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We don’t drink because we’re losers with no self-control. A lot of times we drink because we can’t handle emotions, we get the F its, and we keep convincing ourselves it will be different this time. These are all different types of impulsivity. In this episode, you’ll learn 4 different impulsive traits and how these influence our drinking. I’ll exp…
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E215: 5 Different Ways of Thinking About Sobriety
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Do we “get” to be sober or do we have to be sober? What if you don’t want to glamorize sobriety or think about alcohol as a class one carcinogen? Do you have to call yourself an alcoholic to quit drinking for good? In this episode I’m explaining how we think we are different from everyone else and 5 different ways I’ve seen the sober community talk…
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We drink to cope because it seems to help us manage anxiety, depression, trauma, stress, etc., but self-medicating with alcohol only makes your problems worse. Drinking to cope increases our risk of developing a problem and in this episode I’ll explain why. You’ll learn how much more likely coping drinkers are to develop a problem, how this makes i…
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E213: Self-Care is NOT Temporarily Turning Off Your Brain (Getting "Me Time")
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We think that turning off our brain with alcohol at the end of the day is “me time” and it’s the only way to get a break. This isn’t self-care, it’s called being depleted and trying to survive a life that drains you. Poor self-care is one of the most reliable predictors of relapse in people trying to get sober. It’s important and in this episode I’…
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E212: Why Some People Get Sober and Others Don’t (Resilience and Epigenetics)
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It’s frustrating if you keep trying to stop drinking, but aren’t succeeding. We’ve discussed the brain changes that make it more difficult in a few recent episodes, but there are other factors as well. In this episode we’ll discuss the difference in how people handle the same life circumstances and stressors, and what determines whether you will be…
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Anticipation of the reward from alcohol is one of the main reasons we stay stuck in the back and forth cycle. We believe alcohol will help us relax, unwind, deal with negative emotions, have fun, or connect with others. This is what causes cravings for alcohol. In this episode I’ll explain how we learn to associate certain things with drinking, how…
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E210: Good News, Your Brain Heals A LOT After 90 Days Sober… Unless You Relapse
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Significant brain healing can happen within the first few months of being sober. Finally some good news for us, right? In this episode you’ll learn more about how alcohol damages the brain to make it harder to stay sober and how the brains of people who are able to stay sober differ from those who go on to relapse. It’s not just deciding that you’r…
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E209: How Porn Addiction Affects the Brain
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Behavioral addictions are stigmatized because they feel like more of a choice because there’s no substance changing your brain. However, process addictions or behavioral addictions like porn do actually change the brain in similar ways. In this episode I’ll explain why porn is so addicting, brain changes from porn, and how porn influences us to obj…
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E208: Stress, Depression and Our Eating Habits
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We do the same thing with our diet that we do with our drinking- our eating habits aren’t great, but they’re not bad either so it feels manageable. Our food quality impacts our mental health and stress levels though. I’ve been struggling with fatigue and depression, so it got me interested in the link. In this episode I’m explaining the importance …
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E207: 15 Milestones to Look Forward to in Sobriety (Sober Timeline)
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There are lots of great things that happen when you quit drinking, but we can get distracted by wanting everything to be easy and perfect. In this episode I’m sharing 15 things you can look forward to from day 2 to years of sobriety. Wherever you’re at in your journey, this episode will remind you of some of the best things about being sober. What …
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You’ve probably heard of the acronym HALT, hungry, angry, lonely, tired. These are all triggers for relapse because they influence our ability to think things through and wait. These feelings make us impulsive, overwhelmed, and more likely to go for an instant gratification choice like drinking, even when we know we want to stay sober. In this epis…
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For some of us, each time we go through withdrawal, the next withdrawal is worse. This is called kindling and in this episode I’m explaining what kindling is and how it happens. You’ll learn why we get withdrawal symptoms when we quit drinking, what delirium tremens is, and how kindling makes it harder to get sober. I’ll also discuss what counts as…
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E204: Can Anyone Get Addicted to Alcohol?
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Is everyone on the slow path towards addiction? Are all moderate drinkers a little bit addicted? We know alcohol is an addictive substance that gets us hooked and then changes our brains to keep us hooked, but why does this process even start? In this episode I’ll explain 15 risk factors that can lead us to become addicted to alcohol. You’ll learn …
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E203: Why You Still Want Alcohol Even When You Hate It (It’s Dopamine!)
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Drinking stops being fun and enjoyable, but we continue to do it anyway. Why is this? We know it makes us miserable and we want to stop, but by 4pm or after a few days or weeks of sober time we talk ourselves back into it. In this episode you’ll learn about the adaptations that happen in the brain as we drink heavily and how this leads to compulsiv…
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I talk about doing “the work” a lot on this podcast, so let’s talk about what that work is. In this episode I’ll explain what the work is, roadblocks to doing the work, how you can get started and detours to be aware of on the journey. You’ll learn about victim mentality, blaming others, and if we have to do “the work” forever. What to listen to ne…
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This episode is everything you need to know about cortisol, stress and alcohol. I’ll explain how our stress system adapts to both chronic stress and chronic heavy drinking, how multiple cycles of withdrawal impacts this adaptation, how this causes more cravings, and what this means for our ability to cope with life. We think alcohol helps take the …
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The moment that should have been my rock bottom, but wasn’t. I never thought I’d share this story, but I realized recently that this story doesn’t have any power over me anymore. Shame was a big problem for me during my drinking and when I got sober. I thought I’d never get over it. I had bad memories play like movies in my head and I had no contro…
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Your ability to tolerate frustration can make your life easier or it can make it harder. For most of my life I made things harder for myself. In this episode I’m explaining what frustration tolerance is, some interesting studies on emotion regulation, how this increases our risk of relapse, and what we need to do to better tolerate discomfort, nega…
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E198: 5 Ways Anger Management Changed My Life
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I struggled with anger for most of my life. Conveniently, when I began drinking a lot of my anger went away, but when I got sober it came back stronger than ever. I would get overcome with such intense rage that I struggled to function. Learning to understand my anger, see all the things that were connected to it, and developing skills to work with…
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My Favorite Things I Learned in February and How to Apply Them to Your Life
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I cover a lot of research on this podcast, and it’s probably difficult to remember it all. In this episode, I’m sharing my favorite things I learned in February and how you can apply each of them to your life. Episodes covered: 191-196 Resources I offer: Community & Meetings: Living a Sober Powered Life https://www.soberpowered.com/membership Sober…
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E197: Making the DECISION to Quit Drinking
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A lot of us “quit” drinking and we go back and forth for a long time beating ourselves up for being too weak to stick with it. In this episode, I want to discuss how alcohol impacts our ability to make decisions based on our goals, what actually making the decision looks like, and how you can get closer to quitting for good. What to listen to next:…
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Do You Want to be Sober or Do You Want to Drink Without the Consequences? (Replay)
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Sometimes, we’ll say we don’t want to drink anymore, but what we really mean is we want to drink without the consequences. Your intention matters and if you are carrying around hopes and dreams of drinking again someday, then you’ll drink again. In this episode I want to explain why even when sobriety, your life, your job, and your relationships ar…
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E196: How the Brain Recovers After Quitting Drinking
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Did we blast our brains beyond repair with all of our drinking? What if you drank heavily for decades? Are you doomed? In this episode I’m explaining a ton of different studies on brain recovery in sobriety. You’ll learn what to expect as you get more sober time, if our brains make a full recovery, how long it takes to see improvement, how drinking…
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Sobriety is great, but it can also be frustrating. We did the work right? We quit drinking, so when is it going to get easier? When will we start to feel better? When does sobriety become a normal part of our lives and not something that we have to put so much effort into anymore? I’m answering all of these questions in todays episode What to liste…
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When you’re used to using alcohol to fix all your problems, it’s difficult to know what to do when that’s no longer an option. Drinking prevents us from having to learn coping skills because we use alcohol to control our emotions and feel whatever we want to feel, until the alcohol wears off of course. In this episode, I’m sharing 5 coping skills t…
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E193: Feeling More Emotional and Anxious? How’s Your Sleep?
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Did you know that about 30% of adults don’t get enough sleep? Sure, being tired sucks and many of us are busy and have reasons for not getting enough sleep. But did you know that sleep quality has a major impact on our emotions for the day? In this episode, you’ll learn more about sleep research, how sleep impacts your emotional experience during t…
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My Favorite Things I Learned in January and How to Apply Them to Your Life
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I cover a lot of research on this podcast, and it’s probably difficult to remember it all. In this episode, I’m sharing my favorite things I learned in January and how you can apply each of them to your life. Episodes covered: E186-190 Resources I offer: Community & Meetings: Living a Sober Powered Life https://www.soberpowered.com/membership Sober…
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E192: Do You Need a Drink or Are You Just Hungry? (Alcohol & Ghrelin)
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Cravings make it difficult to stay sober. You may not be craving alcohol because you need it though, you may be craving alcohol because you’re not taking good care of yourself. When we’re drinking we live on autopilot mode and we move through life like a ghost always stuck in past shame and regret or fantasizing about being able to moderate in the …
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E191: Going Back and Forth Makes Your Cravings Stronger
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Many of us go back and forth while we’re trying to stop drinking. You might get 4 or 5 days in, then drink again and repeat this process many times. Obviously, less drinking days are better for your health, but drinking during the withdrawal stage actually intensifies your cravings making it harder to stop next time. In this episode you’ll learn ho…
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E190: Non-Alcoholic Drinks: The Pros and Cons
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Non-alcoholic drinks and mocktails are very popular, but are they good for your sobriety? In this episode I’ll explain both sides of the argument- how they can be helpful for your sobriety and how they can be triggering, cause cravings, or hold you back. You’ll learn if 0.5% non-alcoholic drinks are okay to drink and why you may get the feeling of …
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E189: How the Brain Regulates Emotions & Impulses (Rumination & Retaliation)
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If your mind gets stuck on cravings to drink and you can’t redirect, then you’re more likely to white knuckle it until the craving becomes so intense that you drink. If your mind gets stuck on negative thoughts, jealousy, or unfairness, then you’re going to ruminate until you become more depressed or you retaliate. In this episode, I’m explaining w…
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A lot of us quit drinking and expect weight loss. We see influencers online sharing before and after pictures and telling us how much weight we can lose when we get sober. Not everyone will lose weight when they quit drinking, and some will even gain before they lose. It's all normal. In this episode, I'm discussing how the more we obsess and try t…
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How Many More Years Do You Want to Spend Thinking "It's Not That Bad?" (Gray Area Drinking)
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The biggest problem with gray area drinkers is that they don’t have a huge rock bottom. They usually have limited outward consequences or none at all, and this lack of consequences makes it very easy to keep drinking. Most of us think that quitting for good is only for hardcore alcoholics and if you’re not that bad, then you will be able to figure …
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E187: How Multiple Cycles of Withdrawal Impacts the Recovery of Your Brain
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There are a lot of people who will quit for about a few days or a week or 2 and then go back to drinking, and they repeat this process over and over again. Withdrawal is stressful for the brain and putting your brain through this stress only to blast it with alcohol again is a lot. In this episode you’ll learn how multiple cycles of detoxing and go…
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Every time I say I’m an angry person or that I struggled with rage in my first year people always laugh and say that they can’t imagine that. Anger doesn’t have to be outward and explosive, it can also be a deep boiling rage that you stuff down inside and don’t let anyone see. I’ve been triggered to drink a few times in my four years of sobriety, a…
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How Nutrition Can Support Your Sobriety with Dr. Brooke Scheller
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Dr. Brooke Scheller is back on the show! We’re discussing her new book, How to Eat to Change How You Drink, and focusing on the role nutrition plays in anxiety, alcohol and sugar cravings, blood sugar, gut health, and more. Takeaways: Nutrition plays a significant role in mental health, including anxiety and mood disorders. Blood sugar imbalances c…
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