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Fly with your Shadow is an interview-based podcast featuring conversations about music, mental health, and the devastating effect that the COVID pandemic has had on all of it. You can find us on social media @flywithyourshadow and on our website, flywithyourshadow.com
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Want to get better at work? At managing others? Managing yourself? Gayle Allen interviews experts who take your performance to the next level. Each episode features a book with insights to help you achieve your goals.
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Jeff McMillan's Podcast

DJ Jeff McMillan

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Deep, Funky, Soulful, Jackin' House Music. 420 Ceis, Acumen, Adriatique, Alex Augello, Alex Niggemann & Superlounge, Alexander East, Andrade, Andrew Chibale, Andrew Mataus, Andry Nalin, Andy Clockwork, Andy Meston, Anhanguera, Aphreme, Arco, Armbar, Artie Flexs, Arts & Leisure, Audio Soul Project, Bang Bang, BeatPimps, Belocca, Bleep District, Boo Williams, Brandon Bass, Brent Vassar, Brett Valentine, Bucked Naked, Butch, Canard, The Candy Dealers, Carleto, Chanson E, Chemars, Chris Lauer, C ...
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This year, we witnessed a solar eclipse. Walking the streets of my neighborhood that day, looking through my solar eclipse glasses and sharing them with others, I felt a profound sense of awe.And I saw that awe, that wonder, reflected in the faces of the people around me. For one or two hours, we were part of something bigger than ourselves. And th…
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Evangeline Gentle's 2023 album, Where the Diamonds Are, is a masterpiece sonically and lyrically. It’s melodic and interesting, propelled and shaped by producer and master musician Jim Bryson. He encouraged Evangeline to make a first professional album and has been a mentor, collaborator, and supporter ever since. But even with guidance, talent, an…
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Social connections are one of the keys to a happy and healthy life, yet few of us learn how to build them.If we’re lucky, we have family and friends who model them. But even then, our biology equips us with cognitive biases that can get in the way.Fortunately, award-winning science writer David Robson has studied the research. He shares what he’s l…
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This episode is a cautionary tale about how an artist can work hard, have talent and something to say, then just when their career is starting to take off, through no fault of their own, the rug can get pulled out from underneath and they’re back at the beginning, if not questioning whether music is even the right direction. Mike June has a wealth …
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There are many good reasons to look to others. For example, you might need expert advice or feedback to improve your performance. But there’s one reason not to, and, that is, to determine your self-worth.When you look to someone else to define you or tell you how to live your life, you lose a lot. And if you find it hard to believe you’d ever let s…
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We’re surrounded by people with knowledge. The manager who can provide expert feedback or the colleague who has important information. These kinds of insights can help us achieve our goals.Yet as much as we need that knowledge, we often don’t act in ways that invite it. It’s when the project runs behind or we can’t make our numbers that we realize,…
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We all want to be happy. In fact, it’s our desire for happiness that drives most of our decisions, like our friendships, our activities, even our purchases. Yet, over time, we find that the things that made us so happy at the start – that new car or delicious meal – end up losing their luster. I was curious about why this happens and what, if anyth…
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We crave meaning and purpose, yet obtaining them can feel beyond our control, like they're merely products of luck and circumstance. Fortunately, researchers who’ve studied the power of ritual have found they’re more in our control than we think. In this interview, I talk to one of these researchers, psychologist Michael Norton. He shares how ritua…
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Colleen Brown (colleenbrownmusic.com) is a multi-instrumentalist singer-songwriter on a mission - looking for beauty in the darker corners of human existence. With versatile songwriting and a vulnerable authenticity, she weaves elements of folk, roots, Americana, and pop into a sublime, striking blend. She collaborates with Scenic Route to Alaska i…
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At some point, we all get stuck. Maybe it’s in a job or career. Maybe it’s a relationship or business venture.Though it’s something we all experience, when it happens, we can feel alone and out of our depth. Emotions may overwhelm us. Mental traps lure is in. In no time at all, we can’t see a way out.Award-winning professor, researcher, and author,…
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I first got to know Jory Nash over 20 years ago. His albums, songs, and shows, have always been impressive. He’s toured extensively throughout North America, being featured at festivals and concert halls all over Canada and the U.S. In 2009, his album New Blue Day topped the prestigious Penguin Eggs Magazine poll of music critics, artists, and pres…
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When we’re feeling stuck, it’s tempting to believe more thinking is the answer. We stew and we ponder, and then we double down on solutions we’ve tried before. It’s no wonder we start to feel like we just can’t figure it out.But what would happen if we put thinking aside and tried something else? Author and researcher, Norman Farb, has learned that…
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When we think of geeks, we tend to think of the people who built the tech we use – from our smartphones to search engines to AI. But if we just focus on the tech, we’re missing out on a lot. We’re overlooking how these same geeks reinvented corporate culture using a repeatable set of norms that ensure sustainable innovation.Andrew McAfee is a princ…
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There’s more to being a workaholic than working long hours. Consider what motivates you to work more. Where you’re spending your energy. Think about the impact those longer hours have on family and friends. These are some of the distinctions Malissa Clark makes in her book, Never Not Working: Why the Always-on Culture is Bad for Business and How to…
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We associate the word epidemic with disease. Yet it’s a word we’re increasingly using to refer to a state of mind, namely, loneliness. Researchers have not only found a significant increase in people’s feelings of loneliness, but they’ve also learned how detrimental loneliness can be to our health and wellbeing. One of the most effective antidotes …
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One-on-one meetings are the cornerstone of manager-employee relationships. For managers, they’re an opportunity to teach, coach, and mentor. For employees, they’re a chance to grow and develop.But given how important these meetings are, how well are we using them? How effectively do we plan and run them? Bottom line - are they an afterthought or a …
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For many of us, the word addiction quickly conjures up images of drugs and alcohol. But we’re often slower to apply the term to compulsive, tech-induced behaviors like playing video games, checking social media, or shopping online.We prefer to think of these pleasure-seeking activities as harmless distractions. Yet they can just as easily lead to a…
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We go to the dentist, get our eyes checked, and get our cars inspected. These regularly scheduled health and safety audits let us know how we’re doing.But we rarely audit how we spend our time.Sure, most of us have a calendar. Yet few of us study how these calendar events impact our happiness. We rarely track the connection between what we spend ou…
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I’ve spent a lot of time talking to guests about our relationships at work. For example, we’ve discussed how to listen better, how to navigate conflict, and how to influence others, just to name a few.What I’ve spent less time talking about are the relationships that go beyond work. That’s why I invited Kat Vellos on the show this week to talk abou…
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In the U.S., we have laws and policies in place to prevent discrimination of Black workers. In addition, we have leaders who make public pledges in support of diversity goals. Yet the data continue to show that Black employees are less likely to be hired, more likely to stall out in mid-level positions, and stand little chance of gaining senior lev…
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A well-crafted story can fuel connection. It can inspire trust and entertain. Better still, it can have a ripple effect.Yet most of us avoid telling stories. Instead, we stick to the facts and emphasize the data. Now, even if we believe this is the best way to convey information, our brains, if they could talk, would disagree. That’s why, if we wan…
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We’re often put on the spot to say something of value. And when it happens, it can catch us off guard.For example, you log in early to a conference call and need to make small talk with high status colleagues. Or you find out in a meeting that a co-worker is leaving the company, and you’re asked to say a few words.These kinds of spontaneous interac…
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Most of us are on a performance treadmill. We show up. We execute. Then tomorrow we do it all over again.But this relentless focus on execution leaves little time for learning. As a result, our skills stagnate, and we accomplish less. Soon we find ourselves working harder while falling further behind.Eduardo Briceno calls this The Performance Parad…
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Fly with your Shadow is back after an unexpectedly long absence with a bit of a broader focus to allow for some new guests and different types of conversations! Channelling pain into beauty, Ken Yates’ fourth album is a breathtaking triumph of the human spirit. The cool-hued Cerulean captures the artist’s intimate reckoning as he grieved his dying …
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We live and work in a digital world where getting interrupted by communication tools is the norm. That means we shift our attention at least every 47 seconds. Then it takes us about 30 minutes to get back on task. At the same time, we continually interrupt ourselves – looking things up, tracking information down.While some view this as a problem to…
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As humans, we have certain default settings that help us navigate the world. Yet those same default settings make us vulnerable to fraud and deception.For example, our ability to focus helps us concentrate on what’s right in front of us. But it also prevents us from seeing what’s missing. For example, we’re more willing to believe a presumed invest…
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We’re often told that saying yes to everything will be the key to our success. It’ll strengthen our relationships, enhance our reputation, and help us achieve our goals.But what if the reverse were true? What if learning how to say no is the game changer? What if mastering this skill is the way to achieve our goals?Vanessa Patrick has written a boo…
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Aiming for perfection seems like a noble goal. It’s like we’re holding ourselves to a higher standard or standing out from the crowd.But striving for perfection means working toward the impossible. And the cost to our mental and physical health can be enormous.London School of Economics Professor, Thomas Curran, experienced the impact of perfection…
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For many, work is the centerpiece of our lives. It’s not only a source of status and fulfillment, but also central to our identity.But what do we miss out on when hold these expectations of our work? What does it cost us?That’s the question Simone Stolzoff asks in his book, The Good Enough Job: Reclaiming Life from Work. In answering this question,…
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Winning athletes and coaches have a lot to teach us. They’re asked to perform at the highest level, day in and day out, and they face enormous pressure to succeed.Faced with these expectations, the most successful ones must continually elevate their performance. But how?That’s a question Sally Jenkins has spent a career trying to answer. Through he…
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There’s a lot to be said for the excitement we feel when we first set a goal for ourselves. The sense of exhilaration can give us the momentum we need to get started.But when the exhilaration wears off – and it usually does – we’re faced with a choice. Will we revert to old habits or develop new ones?These moments are what Jonathan Rhodes calls cho…
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Coming up with good ideas is hard. But it’s not because we’re not creative or smart enough. It’s likely we just haven’t learned how.Fortunately, Sheena Iyengar, Professor at Columbia Business School, has written a playbook that answers the question, how can I get my best ideas? It’s her latest book, Think Bigger: How to Innovate.Sheena’s approach l…
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Ambition is complicated. Yet the messages we receive from an early age are simple: “Winners never quit.” “Reach for the stars.” “Follow your dreams.”But like most simple messages, reality often paints a very different picture. Long hours that lead to burnout, or individual striving that results in loneliness.Rainesford Stauffer ran up against these…
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We’ve all had the experience of working toward goals today that would benefit us in the future. Goals like exercising more, losing weight, or saving for retirement.Yet when faced with early-morning alarms or tempting desserts, we may lose sight of our goals.But what if the answer to sticking with them was to form a relationship with a very special …
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At some point, we all get stuck. Maybe it’s in a job or career. Maybe it’s a relationship or business venture.Though it’s something we all experience, when it happens, we can feel alone and out of our depth. Emotions may overwhelm us. Mental traps lure is in. In no time at all, we can’t see a way out.Award-winning professor, researcher, and author,…
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There’s never been a better time to question how we measure intelligence. With ChatGPT and other forms of artificial intelligence pushing the boundaries of what it means to be smart, there’s an opportunity – even an urgency – to reconsider everything we know.That’s why I wanted to talk to Rina Bliss, author of the book, Rethinking Intelligence: A R…
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Small things add up. And, for the most part, that’s a good thing. Like taking the stairs to get more exercise or swapping out something sugary for a piece of fruit. Over time, small actions like these can add up to a healthier lifestyle.Yet there are times when the small things that add up work against our well-being. Every time your boss shifts yo…
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Change is a part of life, and it’s a big part of growing and developing. Yet, with change comes uncertainty, and that can cause us to get stuck.To thrive during change, we need a mental agility that comes from self-awareness, emotional awareness, and situational awareness. It’s about what Elaine Fox calls, switch craft. Elaine Fox is a leading psyc…
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No one wants to feel like a sucker. In fact, the very thought of being one – of playing the fool – shapes our behavior in powerful ways.But what if our fear causes us to make choices that aren’t good for us? Or worse, what if people weaponize our fear in order to dominate or disempower us?Tess Wilkinson-Ryan has written a stunning book on the topic…
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Almost everything we do – personally and professionally – is affected by the words we use.They help us build relationships, persuade others, and communicate feelings. But what if I told you that 6 types of words were better at doing those things than all the others?These findings are at the heart of Jonah Berger’s latest book, Magic Words: What to …
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The pandemic caused many of us to rethink our lives. From the places we’ve been living to the work we’ve been doing. It’s been an opportunity to hit the reset button.Of course, financial considerations play a central role, and that’s something Jill Schlesinger began to notice. It’s what prompted her to write her latest book, The Great Money Reset: …
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As adults, we need to learn new things all the time.Yet many of us are relying on the same outdated methods we used as adolescents to do it. Thinks like relentless highlighting and endless rereading.If so, it may be time to take advantage of the latest research on learning.That’s where Daniel Willingham comes in. In this interview, we discuss his l…
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One of the messages our culture delivers is “not enough.” Not clever enough. Not busy enough. Not successful enough. It’s a cultural mantra that beats just below the surface of many conversations, especially the ones we have with ourselves.That’s what’s so refreshing about Vanessa Bohns’ book, You Have More Influence Than You Think: How We Underest…
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Confidence seems elusive. We do something that comes easily and we don’t think twice about it. Or we try something new, experience setbacks, and question our capabilities. It leaves us thinking that confidence is something other people just seem to have. All the time. Performance psychologist Nate Zinsser knows that’s just not true. For decades he’…
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Most of us have a love-hate relationship with New Year’s resolutions. We love that feeling of a fresh start. But we hate how our commitments seldom make it to Valentine’s Day.So what if this year we had an expert teach us how to do it right?Ayelet Fishbach is that expert. She’s a social psychologist at the University of Chicago and author of the bo…
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We go to the dentist, get our eyes checked, and get our cars inspected. These regularly scheduled health and safety audits let us know how we’re doing.But we rarely audit how we spend our time.Sure, most of us have a calendar. Yet few of us study how these calendar events impact our happiness. We rarely track the connection between what we spend ou…
  continue reading
 
How we think about things can have an outsize impact on whether we achieve our goals.Take, for example, the research we might do to make an important decision. If we’re already committed to a certain way of thinking, it’s likely we’ll only focus on information that confirms what we already believe. It’s what scientists call confirmation bias, and i…
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Who are you? It’s a question you’ve had to answer if you’ve ever moved, changed jobs, or started a new relationship.And it’s natural that who you are will change with each new experience you gain and new memories you form. The “story of you” will be different.At the same time, our brain is an incredible editor. With limited storage space for memori…
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Work relationships matter more than we think. They can be a key reason we stay in a job or the reason we leave. When they don’t go well, they can consume a lot of our time and energy, both in and out of work.That’s why we need to get better at them. Even the difficult ones, like a boss who takes all the credit or a co-worker who’s perpetually negat…
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What if becoming a better quitter was something to aspire to?Annie Duke thinks it is. She’s a national science foundation fellowship winner and bestselling author who’s used her background in psychology to become a successful poker player and business advisor. Lately, she’s spent time studying the power of quitting, a tool she argues is as importan…
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