Best Travis Helwig Podcasts (2024)

1
POSTGAME POD: LAFC v Real Salt Lake 38:29

5h ago38:29

38:29

LAFC looked exhausted in this one, and RSL came out with a lot of fight, and less bite than usual with no Chicho, and somehow we came out of it with a tie. We stole a tie? But also we could've stolen a win? But maybe we should have lost by a lot? Wtf was this match? We looked real good in our new kits, and looked real bad in every other way. Darren…

1
RSL / SEATTLE MATCH PREVIEW: Tight Table, Tight Schedule, Tight Roster, Loose Chicho 1:02:08

8h ago1:02:08

1:02:08

With Travis on a football Rumspringa, Vince and Darren quickly solve all Copa America problems and get into LAFC problems, which, after a 5-1 trampling from Columbus... might not be so bad? Everyone else at the top of the table lost or tied and we are somehow left with the same Tightest of Tight Tables as before. How does the Supporter Shield race …

1
POSTGAME POD: LAFC v Columbus Crew 52:57

5h ago52:57

52:57

With Travis fleeing just in time to miss this absolute shit show vs. Columbus, Darren and Vince break down what happened in this catastrophic loss vs. Columbus, instead of the revenge we were after. And by that I mean Vince breaks it down. Darren doesn't break things down. If anything he makes things more complex and convoluted, as a general rule. …

1
POSTGAME POD: LAFC v New Mexico United 38:54

2d ago38:54

38:54

Well, we certainly grew the game (girth-wise). It's HaFoSaFo After Dark and Vince, Darren, and Travis break down the incredible (?) victory against USL's top side New Mexico United. We talk about Martinez' up and down game, the truly great fans from New Mexico, and spend way too long begging US Soccer to not hire Steve Cherundolo. Also the game too…

1
NEW MEXICO / COLUMBUS MATCH PREVIEW: Diego Rossi, oooh Diego Rossi! 58:37

4d ago58:37

58:37

Two games, one week, zero intelligent thoughts from our podcast. Darren, Vince, and Travis break down Diego Rossi's homecoming back to BMO which also just happens to be a re-match of the MLS Cup Final we all remember so fondly. Then they chat with Chris Walker, head of Black Diamonds, a BIPOC Supporter Group from New Mexico United, and he does hone…

1
EL TRÁFICO MATCH PREVIEW: Every Rose Bowl Has It's Thorn (Parking) 57:39

11d ago57:39

57:39

Do you hear that? In the distance? It's the sound of Galaxy's tifo slowly disintegrating at the Rose Bowl last year. Wait, what's that sound? It's the crack of a cooler smashing into a thousand pieces on Christmas Tree Lane. Oh no! What's that smell? Is that an LAFC fan defecating in the stands of BMO Stadium? That's right. We've made it. It's here…

1
POSTGAME POD: LAFC v Colorado 1:01:54

13d ago1:01:54

1:01:54

In honor of Mati Bogusz, here are the lyrics to the Polish national anthem: Poland has not yet perished, So long as we still live. What the foreign force has taken from us, We shall with sabre retrieve. March, march, Dąbrowski, From Italy to Poland. Under your command We shall rejoin the nation. We’ll cross the Vistula, we’ll cross the Warta, We sh…

1
COLORADO MATCH PREVIEW: Bogusz Is Loousz w/ Rapids Sporting Director Fran Taylor 1:02:47

16d ago1:02:47

1:02:47

Ladies and gentlemen, we got him. Colorado Rapids Sporting Director Fran Taylor RETURNS TO THE SHOW before any LAFC front office member has come on once. Darren and him discuss their childhood memories, why Darren could have gone pro, and Vince asks him why the charts were wrong about Hugo Lloris. We break down all the storylines for this weeks mat…

1
POSTGAME POD: LAFC v San Jose 48:35

21d ago48:35

48:35

I heard you like goals, so we made the entire game out of goals! Kei Kamara breaks L*ndon D*novan's record. Tomas Àngel scores his first MLS goal. Polish Powerhouse Mati Bogusz gets a diving header brace. And best of all, Travis kissed Vince under the neon lights of Pepsi Plaza. It was a sloppy post-game for a beautifully unsloppy game. LAFC IS FIR…

1
POSTGAME POD: LAFC v Austin v Ted Unkel 41:52

24d ago41:52

41:52

Kei Kamara > Landon Donovan Kei Kamara > Landon Donovan Kei Kamara > Landon Donovan Kei Kamara > Landon Donovan Kei Kamara > Landon Donovan Kei Kamara > Landon Donovan Kei Kamara > Landon Donovan Kei Kamara > Landon Donovan Kei Kamara > Landon Donovan Kei Kamara > Landon Donovan Ted Unkel, retire freak Join our Patreon and help us keep making this …

1
AUSTIN / SAN JOSE MATCH PREVIEW: Keep Austin Mid 57:49

26d ago57:49

57:49

While Travis watches the Tony Awards (because he's at the Tony Awards), Darren cold-reads Travis' Austin FC and San Jose storylines: can LAFC win in Austin? Can they leapfrog RSL and take over first place in the West? Does anyone care about San Jose? Is it all a big ole' trap? Will Darren survive whatever Travis makes him read? IS AUSTIN WEIRD?????…

1
POSTGAME POD: LAFC v Orlando 34:06

29d ago34:06

34:06

When you're rollin, you're rollin. LAFC stole one this afternoon. With both teams playing pretty sloppy, Bouanga and Bogusz ATE to secure the win. Also Orlando blew it, including a missed PK that sailed over the goal and into the stands, which Darren made sure to compare to Baggio's World Cup breakdown and completely ruin Vince's night! With Travis…

1
ORLANDO MATCH PREVIEW: More Like BORE-lando, Am I Right? 54:16

1M ago54:16

54:16

And we're back! LAFC sits just 3 points out of the lead in the West and only 96% humidity stands in their way! Vince, Darren, and Travis break down everything you need to know about this Saturday's match including Hugo's streak, Tillman's absence, and whether or not we knew Chanot was from Luxembourg. Plus, we play a game comparing Disneyland to Di…

1
POSTGAME POD: LAFC v FC Dallas 38:03

1M ago38:03

38:03

With Travis lost at sea, Darren is joined by Vince live outside BMO stadium after a SOUND 1-0 LAFC victory over FC Dallas, with our new look LAFC simply taking care of what is now business as usual, on a Pride Night at BMO with 10/10 vibes. Bouanga came through with maybe the easiest finish he's had all season off a beautiful pass from the hottest …

1
POSTGAME POD: LAFC v Minnesota United 31:24

2M ago31:24

31:24

Clean Sheet Watch CONTINUES with a beautiful 2-0 victory over tight table buddies Minnesota United, who turns out, might not be so good after all. Travis, Vince and Darren break down everything you need to know while the stream also breaks down in maybe one of the worst string of technical difficulties to pod has ever seen. We talked Pierogi SZN wi…

1
MINNESOTA / DALLAS MATCH PREVIEW: You Oughta Chanot 57:23

2M ago57:23

57:23

Minnesota is near the top of the table. Dallas is... also on the table. Travis, Darren, and Vince breakdown everything you need to know about the match week, including why our defense is looking unstoppable, if Minnesota is a legit contender, and is Lizzo canceled. Then we play a World Famous Darren Miller Trivia Game where we find out just how con…

1
POSTGAME POD: LAFC v Atlanta United 41:44

2M ago41:44

41:44

Red Card Giveth. Red Card Taketh Away. Travis and Darren break down our SECOND league road win of the year, in a truly terrifying match up against a shook Atlanta squad. We talk Bogusz' beautiful goal and Bogusz' not so beautiful game. We talk Atuesta's affinity for yellow cards, and Dolo's affinity for never subbing him off. And as always, we spen…

1
POSTGAME POD: LAFC v Loudoun United 31:56

2M ago31:56

31:56

W E G R E W T H E G A M E!!!!!!! W E G R E W T H E G A M E!!!!!!! W E G R E W T H E G A M E!!!!!!! W E G R E W T H E G A M E!!!!!!! W E G R E W T H E G A M E!!!!!!! We are going to the quarterfinals baby!! Darren, Vince, and Travis (in a bathrobe) break down that BARNBURNER of a Lamar Hunt US Open Cup Match where we discuss everything: Tomás Ángel'…

1
LOUDOUN / ATLANTA MATCH PREVIEW: Lamar Hunt Or Be Lamar Hunted 54:39

2M ago54:39

54:39

It's time to grow the game baby!!! Darren, Vince, and Travis are back breaking down BOTH games this week, starting first with the VERY IMPORTANT match against Loudoun United in the Lamar Hunt US Open Cup and then the tough road game against a weak Atlanta squad. We decide once and for all who should start for our defense, play a game about all the …

1
POSTGAME POD: LAFC v St Louis CITY 46:07

2M ago46:07

46:07

Don't look now, but we're tied for second in the West. This game had everything: Hugo saved penalty, Bouanga Blast Boing Boing, questionable red card, and dozens of people wearing ravioli hats for some reason. Darren, Vince, and Travis break it down everything you need to know from this Wednesday 8am game. And they said we couldn't win on the road,…

1
ST LOUIS CITY MATCH PREVIEW: Why You Gotta Be So Giroud? 1:01:22

2M ago1:01:22

1:01:22

It's official: OLIVIER GIROUD IS BLACK AND GOLD and he's excited to play next to superstar Christian Olivera. Travis, Darren, and Vince break down LAFC's masterclass against Vancouver, the question mark hanging over The Smart Choice, and we only mention Vanni Sartini for 60 seconds! Then, we do a quarterly review of our pre-season predictions and c…

1
POSTGAME POD: LAFC v Vancouver 35:39

2M ago35:39

35:39

The following is a quote from Mr. Goaltee himself Kiké Olivera: "I'm coming out I want the world to know, got to let it show I'm coming out I want the world to know, I got to let it show There's a new me coming out and I just had to live And I wanna give, I'm completely positive I think this time around, I am gonna do it Like you never knew it, oh,…

1
VANCOUVER MATCH PREVIEW: Sartini In A Bottle 1:03:29

2M ago1:03:29

1:03:29

It's our favorite time of the year: talking about the Vancouver Whitecaps!!!! We just LOVE to talk about that interesting team! Darren, Vince, and Travis break down everything you need to know about Hugo Lloris' struggles, who we might lose or gain this summer, and we answer a ton of listener questions. Plus, we spend like 3 hours talking about Van…

1
POSTGAME POD: LAFC v Las Vegas 32:24

2M ago32:24

32:24

Wow, we really did grow the game tonight, didn't we folks? LAFC flew out to Las Vegas, scored three times on a dirty pitch, and flew home with a feeling of deep regret and sorrow. Olivera got a brace, Romero got some playing time, and the stream was uploaded in 56k. As we all know, the Lamar Hunt US Open Cup is the most important trophy ever create…

1
S6E12 - British Book Awards 2024 Special 48:15

2M ago48:15

48:15

Episode Notes It's our British Book Awards Special! We discuss the titles on the British Book Awards shortlist for Book of the Year - Audiobook: Non-Fiction. The shortlist is: Alan Partridge: Big Beacon, written and narrated by Alan Partridge Making It So, written and narrated by Patrick Stewart Spare, written and narrated by Prince Harry Strong Fe…

1
POSTGAME POD: LAFC v. San Jose (But We Played Like They Were Miami And We Were San Jose) 53:40

3M ago53:40

53:40

LAFC has raised the bar for just how low the floor can go in 2024. Ironically, the one bright spot of this match is that Olivera finally found the net! And the rest is a pit of darkness we waste no time diving into. Between callers venting, Heel Of The Foot Geoff Tock still finding new ways to be a true heel to us, the team, and even the rest of ou…

1
SAN JOSE / VEGAS MATCH PREVIEW: Double Down Double Episode 57:18

3M ago57:18

57:18

Two matches in one week? What is this... 2023? Darren, Travis, and Vince are back with a DOUBLE EPISODE covering our Levi Stadium match up against the San Jose Earthquakes and the US Open Cup match up against a team with kiddie pools lining the stadium. We talk LAFC's surprisingly good April, we give all the players Vegas recs, and spend way too lo…

1
POSTGAME POD: LAFC v Portland (Bouanga's Version) 42:11

3M ago42:11

42:11

Most fun livestream of the season! A hard fought game FINALLY goes our way as we remain unbeaten at home. Vince, Darren, and Travis break down a rollercoaster of a match against the surprisingly good Portland Timbers. We got overconfident, then we got underconfident, and then we got normal confident. We talked Maxime v Hugo. We talked Olivera vs Ol…

1
POSTGAME POD: LAFC v Red Bull New York 33:01

3M ago33:01

33:01

Despite LAFC's less than stellar performance throughout most of the game, they manage to steal a point from the team at the top of the table. We asked for lineup changes! We fucked around and found out, and in some cases what we found out was pretty good (Chanot), in some cases it didn't go so well (Bogusz, Segura), and in some cases, Aaron long sl…

1
RB NEW YORK MATCH PREVIEW: The Cannabis Cup w/ 42 Originals' Keaton Cashier 1:03:21

3M ago1:03:21

1:03:21

No, you're not dying. You just smoked too much before the 4/20 game this Saturday. Darren, Vince, and Travis break down everything you need to know about this weeks very high match up against MLS leaders Red Bull New York. Then we're joined by Keaton Cashier of the 42 Originals LAFC Supporter Group who talks about what a cannabis supporter group ac…

1
POSTGAME POD: LAFC v Portland 41:32

3M ago41:32

41:32

PRO Giveth and PRO Taketh Away. Darren, Vince, and Travis break down a frustrating tie on the road that was needed, but still felt like a loss. We talk Palencia trying to fight Max, Bouanga's desperate need for anti-depressants, and even Crépeau getting a red to save us again. There are glimmers of hope with this squad, but is it time to change up …

1
PORTLAND MATCH PREVIEW: It's Going Down, I'm Yelling Timber! 36:29

3M ago36:29

36:29

TONS OF NEW MERCH AVAILABLE AT HAPPYFOOTSADFOOTPOD.COM. Patreon subscribers get 15% off everything and exclusive access to our limited edition member only scarves! MLS Player vs Pokemon is back! Darren, Vince, and Travis break down everything you need to know before watching our Portland match up. And don't worry, this episode has everything: Maxim…

1
POSTGAME POD: LAFC v Carson 52:28

3M ago52:28

52:28

There is no joy in El Tráfico. Only relief. And boy was that true tonight. Darren, Vince, and Travis break down a must-win match up at home against a soaring Galaxy team, and this game had everything: great defense from our backline, a rock hard goal from Timmy, and Bouanga doing the least Bouanga thing we've ever seen. It wasn't the prettiest game…

1
EL TRÁFICO MATCH PREVIEW: Is It Bigger Than Riqui Puig? 44:30

4M ago44:30

44:30

The drums are drumming. The tweets are tweeting. The coolers are crumbling. It's time for El Tráfico. Not only do we play the dumbest game in the history of this podcast, but Travis defends his Twitter meltdown, Vince explains why Carson is so good this year, and Darren gets a new nickname. It's the first El Tráfico where LAFC is the underdog, and …

1
POSTGAME POD: LAFC v Colorado Rapids 43:42

4M ago43:42

43:42

Well that one just absolutely sucked. Travis picked the perfect time to get knocked out with a concussion then jump on a plane to Hawaii. Darren did his own version of that after this postgame pod by taking his 6 year old son to Ikea for 4 hours, BUT FIRST! Darren and Vince detail the construction and subsequent destruction of LAFC's house of cards…

1
COLORADO MATCH PREVIEW: More Like LOL-orado w/ Tom Bogert of The Athletic 53:10

4M ago53:10

53:10

RED ALERT! TOM BOGERT IS ON THE POD TO TALK ABOUT OUR NEW FRENCH SIGNINGS! RED ALERT! Travis, Darren, and Vince break down everything you need to know about our new French boys, discuss just how back with think the team is, and Travis bonks his head really hard and goes into concussion protocol. Folks... it's a WEIRD ONE! Join our Patreon and help …

1
S6E11 - A chat with Matthew Weisgerber 50:12

4M ago50:12

50:12

Episode Notes We chat to Matt Weisgerber. Matt is a narrator and voice actor who currently has 38 audiobooks available on Audible. He works mostly in the sci-fi and fantasy genres, as well as works aimed at younger audiences. Outside of narration, Matt is currently working on obtaining a Master's degree in counselling, and is a lover of retro video…

1
POSTGAME POD: LAFC v Nashville SC 46:25

4M ago46:25

46:25

LAFC has their biggest win of the season in a must-win game against Nashville and Darren, Travis, and Vince are here to break it all down. Olly breaks free, Olivera breaks loose, and Bouanga breaks hearts. This episode has everything: Geoff Tock spouting Olly conspiracy theories, a shirtless man rambles in his car, and we actually have fun talking …

1
NASHVILLE MATCH PREVIEW: Giroud D'Etat 43:43

4M ago43:43

43:43

Abs, Hair, and Jaw Line, Oh My! Darren, Vince, and Travis break down everything you need to know about this week's must win match up against Nashville SC and the rumors swirling about LAFC potentially signing French superstar Olivier Giroud. Then we're joined by women's soccer expert and TikToker @CaseysOnTheCase to breakdown all the NWSL and ACFC …

1
POSTGAME POD: LAFC v Minnesota United 43:09

4M ago43:09

43:09

Team bad. Game bad. Show good. Darren, Travis and Vince break down the demoralizing 2-0 loss and struggle to find upsides in the first month of the season. We ask the tough questions like: is it time to give Vela an ultimatum, can Atuesta and Illie play together, and is JT alone in this world? Plus, Hell of the Foot Geoff Tock shows up and acts hap…

1
MINNESOTA MATCH PREVIEW: Gooning for a Loon-ing 48:17

4M ago48:17

48:17

It's four weeks into the season, and you know what that means: time to make rash and regrettable generalizations about the quality of our team! Vince walks us through Minnesota's weird season so far, Travis asks if we should worry about Christian Olivera, and Darren's twin children make their podcast debut in a game about the Twin Cities. Plus, we …

1
S6E10 - The Tusks of Extinction by Ray Nayler 37:36

4M ago37:36

37:36

Episode Notes We discuss The Tusks of Extinction by Ray Nayler as narrated by Stefan Rudnicki and Gabrielle de Cuir.We're looking for guests. About the book: When you bring back a long-extinct species, there’s more to success than the DNA. Moscow has resurrected the mammoth, but someone must teach them how to be mammoths, or they are doomed to die …

1
POSTGAME POD: LAFC v Sporting KC 37:38

4M ago37:38

37:38

This game had everything: no goals, terrible passing, and a scab ref randomly ending the game on a goal scoring opportunity. It was pure, uncut MLS and we hated every minute! Darren, Vince, and Travis break down everything you need to know, from Bouanga's frustrating start to the season, to Martinez's flash of brillaince, to Kiké's struggles, we co…

1
KANSAS CITY MATCH PREVIEW: Thwarting Kansas City 40:24

5M ago40:24

40:24

We finally shoveled the snow off the pitch and we're ready to play some real football. Travis (he's back!) breaks down all the storylines leading up to the Saturday's match, Vince breaks down the tactics, and Darren breaks down in tears after Vince and Travis shove him into a locker. Plus we talk Vela rumors, how we tried to bribe Tom Bogert for sc…

1
POSTGAME POD: LAFC v Real Salt Lake 35:31

5M ago35:31

35:31

A truly insane day for LAFC started with a wind damage delay for two hours, then a lightning delay after 4 minutes of play, and then a full match in a snowstorm that essentially made it nearly impossible to run, pass, shoot, defend, etc. etc. etc.. Darren and Vince waste no time trying to make sense of a senseless schoolyard snow day pickup match a…

1
REAL SALT LAKE MATCH PREVIEW: Pay the refs so we can yell at them! 53:56

5M ago53:56

53:56

Darren and Vince preview LAFC's first Brunch Match against Real Salt Lake on Saturday. With Bogusz and Tillman both scoring last week, will we keep relying on Bouanga for goals, or will others keep stepping up too? Is Chicho the most missed player in LAFC history? Does he ever mention us or like talk about us or like ask how we're doing or anything…

1
S6E9 - Leo Moon: The Aries Billionaire by Rachel Wells & Jessica Adams 29:38

5M ago29:38

29:38

Episode Notes We discuss Leo Moon: The Aries Billionaire by Rachel Wells & Jessica Adams as read by Oliver Chris. Aries billionaire Mike Kirby is celebrating his 50th birthday on his remote island with his unhappy wife, handpicked guests, a Blood Moon Eclipse and...a rocket launch. A coma and a murder later, it’s down to astrologer Leo Moon to unco…

1
POSTGAME POD: LAFC v Seattle 46:41

5M ago46:41

46:41

LAFC wasted no time showing us what they're capable of this season, and shit did it feel good to have a win to celebrate again. No shortage of happy foots from Darren, Vince, callers, and the live chat on our first after party of the season: Atuesta looking like he never left, Lloris looking YOUNG AND SPRY, Bogusz and Tillman dailing in a pair of b…

1
SEATTLE MATCH PREVIEW: Facing The Top Of The West (On A U.S. Map, Not The Table) 43:06

5M ago43:06

43:06

Darren and Vince preview the LAFC's first MLS game of 2024 against the Seattle Sounders, and Darren's first birria of 2024 against his stomach. They discuss LAFC's drastically different lineup, Seattle's drastically similar lineup, and boldly jinx LAFC's perfect record in home openers. They also answer @AKaiAndHisDogs' Twitter question and draft AN…

1
An Idiot's Guide To The 2024 LAFC Season 51:25

5M ago51:25

51:25

Vince breaks down the storylines headed into the season. Are you still mad? What about the new players? What about the old players? Is Vela done? If Vela's done, how will we honor the legend? And what about all the other teams? Plus, Vince and Darren draft new LAFC goal scoring fantasy squads for the season, and make season-long predictions. WE'RE …

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