If You Had Your Time Over // Living Generously, Part 2

A Different Perspective Official Podcast

I’m sure as you look back on your life you can see some mistakes that you’ve made in the area of your finances. I certainly can. And, you know, it would be kind of nice if we avoided those mistakes in the future.

Berni: Alex, welcome to the program. I guess even though these days you’re a bit of a money expert, right? Call I call you that?

Alex: I don’t think there is such a thing!

Berni: I guess you’ve made a few mistakes along the way yourself?

Alex: I’m embarrassed to say but yes, absolutely. A few. More than one.

Berni: What sort of a household did you grow up in? Was it rich or poor? Did your parents manage their money well or not? I mean, what did you take away from your upbringing?

Alex: Well actually quite a bit. I did grow up in a very affluent household by world standards. And look, that was good in many ways in the sense that my father actually ran a bank so you would hope that I’d be reasonable at you know ...

Berni: You’d hope so.

Alex: At finance. So ... but I guess some of the more negative sides is probably picking up spending habits. Because we were reasonably affluent we had lots of nice things: nice holidays and things like that. And, in and of themselves, there’s absolutely nothing wrong with those things. But the problem is when you’re young those things can become very, very desirable and you end up spending more money than you’re actually earning which is a common problem.

So one of the mistakes I made was at 21 I had nearly $21,000 in credit card debt, it had got close to that. So I’d been at university, I had part-time jobs. I had lots of nice holidays in-between: overseas trips, skiing, you know ... and that obviously built up quite a bit of debt over time. So it wasn’t until I entered full-time work that I could start paying that back.

So that was one of the mistakes I made. And I think it came from living in a house where everything was quite easy, very comfortable, and always talking about holidays and the next thing.

Berni: It’s interesting; when you left home you discovered that all of a sudden, things that used to be free are no longer free.

Alex: Yes.

Berni: And so it takes a little while for young people ...

Alex: Absolutely ...

Berni: Very much to adjust to that. It must have been a sobering thing to have to climb your way out of that debt. Did your parents help you or did you actually have to dig your way out of that hole?

Alex: No, I paid it all off myself. I can’t remember how long it took. I would have taken probably close to two years I suspect back in those days when my income was obviously a lot less. But certainly it’s a tough lesson. And I think these days young people are almost targets because credit is so easy and you know, these days you can actually tap and go. Money has become so easy it’s frightening. And therefore we’re actually quite vulnerable in one sense.

Berni: When you were a young guy, what were your hopes and dreams and ambitions? What did they look like?

Alex: Yeah and I think actually this is interesting because it raises a great point. Is how you think about money affects your behaviour. One of the things ...

Berni: Say that again, it’s important.

Alex: It’s very important. How you think about money shapes the way you will behave with money.

Berni: OK, explain that.

Alex: OK so ... and then once again this is a kind of a bit of a confession. So growing up in a house where I had a very successful father. You know, running a bank, you know, and running very big businesses. I had a drive to be successful. Now in some ways that can be not necessarily a bad thing, but can become a bad thing in the sense that you become quite status driven.

How you look and how you appear to people becomes important – be it the way you dress and the car you drive. So for example at probably 21, 22 I had an expensive European car. It was debt funded and a lot of that I think was driven by my psychology at the time was that desire to want to look successful. And I mean to both be successful and actually to look it as well.

And so it’s kind of that way I thought about money. Because it was wrong. Certainly wrong from a biblical perspective. You know, the call from a Christian point of view is to use your money to honour God and let him get the glory rather than you get the glory from mankind. And so you’re often chasing the praises of man rather than the praises of God.

Berni: Were you a Christian back then or not?

Alex: I was but I’d been a Christian from ... I became a Christian aged 17 so I think like most of us you make mistakes along the way. But I was from a non-Christian household so I’d never had you know, Christian ways drilled into me from a young age.

Berni: OK, so you got yourself into this debt because you thought you had to look good and live the expensive lifestyle. I presume at some stage you got married and the whole mortgage thing happens and all those responsibilities. When you got into that situation, what other mistakes did you make?

Alex: So I think the biggest challenge I’ve had I think is mainly around mindset. The biggest learning I’ve had over the last sort of 10 years of my adult life has been that the money I have is actually God’s money.

Because when you think of it as being your money, and most people ... the trap I’ve had for most of my adult life is – it’s my money, I’ve worked hard for it. And when you think like that there’s a tendency to want to use all that money for yourself and to just, you know, spend on having a good time. But when I realised that actually, well, I’m a Christian and I’ve got to actually use the treasure if you like that God’s given me to do good things with it, to help those in need.

That really changed my mind set and so my ... if you like my behaviour with money went from being one of saving very little to one of giving much more. And of course behaving and becoming much more sensible. And certainly when you do get married and have kids that sort of sharpens the focus. When you’re young and single you tend to not think about that too much.

Berni: Yeah, totally.

Alex: So it does definitely change.

Berni: Yeah. It’s interesting. You and I had very similar lives and young men. I relate to a lot of what you’re talking about. I’d be interested in your take on this. What I found though, ultimately, is the stuff I was able to buy with my money, whilst it might have given me a short-term fix, never really satisfied anything.

Alex: Absolutely right. Most things wear out within six months and the new car’s great for what, the first five or six weeks. And after that, oh yeah, it’s just a car. But unfortunately though, if you buy with debt, the debt hangs around for five years plus.

Berni: Absolutely.

Alex: So it’s certainly hard to get out of that because it’s so ingrained. And one of the things when I teach our courses on money is really trying to help people to understand their values. What shape them. Because your upbringing has a very profound effect on the way you think about money.

And so you really need to try and be honest with yourself and understand who you are and what’s driving you. And realise that that’s not necessarily aligned with God’s word and that you need to, over time, actually align your finances with God’s word.

Berni: What’s a pivotal passage for you in aligning your finances with God’s word?

Alex: Yeah, I love the passage that says:

Seek first His kingdom and all these things will be given to you.

Because, you know, one of the principles we talked about in the Bible is that we need to put God first in our life. And Martin Luther famously once said, ‘There are three conversions: the head, the heart and the wallet.’ And often the wallet comes a long time after. But if we were to be true to ourselves and say that as Christians we’re going to put God first then that needs to happen with our money too.

Berni: A lot of Christians are really touchy about that. The moment a pastor gets up and talks about money, right, people go ‘Ah right, hang on.’ People get really touchy about that. Why is that do you think?

Alex: I think money is one of the biggest things in life that can come between you and God. And it’s always competing with God for your attention. And as a result, people when they hear their pastor talking about it, it can make them feel uncomfortable because it’s actually dealing with an idol in their life.

Berni: I heard one preacher once say that the nerve that runs from your heart to your wallet is particularly sensitive.

Alex: It’s very true. And so look, we know we have to over time acknowledge that it is a real issue. And you’ve kind of got to watch yourself. It’s one of those things where you’ve got to guard your heart constantly because it’s a pressure that will never go away. Because the world is always telling you one thing and the then you’re reading the exact opposite in the Bible.

Berni: What I find encouraging hearing your story is you started off the way we all start off: stupidly with debt and making mistakes and stuff. But somehow by spending time in God’s word you’ve kind of got that sorted out. You know, I’m not saying the pressure’s gone away but you’ve fundamentally got it sorted out in your life.

Alex: Yeah, I think there’ll always be that pressure. There’s always things out there. And I think when it comes to say, keeping up with the Joneses for example, the problem with the Joneses is they’re sitting right beside you every day. They’re at work or in church. So you’re always going to have that kind of pressure. But as you mature as a Christian and when you start to realise what life is really all about and the purpose you’re here for, your calling and so forth. When you know your calling and your assignment in life you can really channel your energy and your finances towards what you’re called to do. So it changes.

Berni: Good stuff Alex. We’ll talk about this some more another time.

Alex: Fantastic.