Finding Freedom: Reflections on One Year of No Contact

Adoptees Crossing Lines

#Self-Improvement #Society #Conversations #Adoption #Foster Care #Birth Mother #Abortion #Transracial #Family Policing #Abolition #Podcasting Education #Zaira #Adoptees #Child Welfare

36:16

DANMMMMM…Have I got a show for you! First, a lot of Sister Wives tea - new rumors have surfaced Janelle Brown is leaving the show. Plus, Gabe Brown gives a life update after losing and tragically finding his brother Garrison dead. Sadly, Garrison took his own life in March 2024. Then we head over to discuss the new Welcome To Plathville tea. The first pictures of Micah Plath have surfaced after being beat up by his brother Issac and it doesn’t look good for the future of his modeling career. Lastly, we discuss the latest in the Justin Baldoni v Blake Lively case, Justin is back on social media and it was the perfect social media return. Timestamps: 00:00:00 - Open and new Sister Wives news 00:05:43 - Janelle Brown leaving the show? Sister Wives Closet is officially closed 00:12:45 - A new pic of Micah Plath’s broken nose has surfaced 00:18:18 - Justin Baldoni back on social media and Taylor Swifts team is pissed at Justin Baldoni MY Go Big Podcasting Courses Are Here! Purchase Go Big Podcasting and learn to start, monetize, and grow your own podcast. USE CODE: MOM15 for 15% OFF (code expires May 11th, 2025) **SHOP my Amazon Marketplace - especially if you're looking to get geared-up to start your own Podcast!!!** https://www.amazon.com/shop/thesarahfrasershow Show is sponsored by: Download Cash App & sign up! Use our exclusive referral code TSFS in your profile, send $5 to a friend within 14 days, and you’ll get $10 dropped right into your account. Terms apply Horizonfibroids.com get rid of those nasty fibroids Gopurebeauty.com science backed skincare from head to toe, use code TSFS at checkout for 25% OFF your order Nutrafol.com use code TSFS for FREE shipping and $10 off your subscription Rula.com/tsfs to get started today. That’s R-U-L-A dot com slash tsfs for convenient therapy that’s covered by insurance. SkylightCal.com/tsfs for $30 OFF your 15 inch calendar Quince.com/tsfs for FREE shipping on your order and 365 day returns Warbyparker.com/tsfs make an appointment at one of their 270 store locations and head to the website to try on endless pairs of glasses virtually and buy your perfect pair Follow me on Instagram/Tiktok: @thesarahfrasershow ***Visit our Sub-Reddit: reddit.com/r/thesarahfrasershow for ALL things The Sarah Fraser Show!!!*** Advertise on The Sarah Fraser Show: thesarahfrasershow@gmail.com Got a juicy gossip TIP from your favorite TLC or Bravo show? Email: thesarahfrasershow@gmail.com Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices…

about a year ago 46:06

MP3•Episode home

Send us a text

1 Year of No Contact

It's been 365 days since I cut ties with my adopters to protect myself.

A year of healing, self-discovery, and finding my voice.

In this episode, I share my no contact journey, the reasons behind my decision, the process of healing, and the freedom I’ve found.

Hear my story of setting boundaries, seeking safety, and reclaiming my identity.

What we discussed

(00:24) 1 year of no contact

(01:50) “but they’re your parents” OR Expectation to be grateful

(04:17) How I felt after no contact

(06:21) Family policing gaslit me

(11:20) Forgiveness as a weapon

(14:36) Becoming free, finally

(18:01) Getting tattoos (& my favorite one)

(20:26) Being able to grieve my mom

(30:56) Healing by finding biological family

(34:38) Stealing me from my mom

(36:12) #1 reason for child removal

(39:43) Why I do this work

Links

Follow us on social media: Twitter | Instagram | Tiktok

Credits

Special thanks to Samuel Oyedele for editing our podcast, support his work on Instagram or e-mail him at Drumaboyiglobal@gmail.com

44 episodes

Finding Freedom: Reflections on One Year of No Contact

Adoptees Crossing Lines

published about a year ago

MP3•Episode home

Send us a text

1 Year of No Contact

It's been 365 days since I cut ties with my adopters to protect myself.

A year of healing, self-discovery, and finding my voice.

In this episode, I share my no contact journey, the reasons behind my decision, the process of healing, and the freedom I’ve found.

Hear my story of setting boundaries, seeking safety, and reclaiming my identity.

What we discussed

(00:24) 1 year of no contact

(01:50) “but they’re your parents” OR Expectation to be grateful

(04:17) How I felt after no contact

(06:21) Family policing gaslit me

(11:20) Forgiveness as a weapon

(14:36) Becoming free, finally

(18:01) Getting tattoos (& my favorite one)

(20:26) Being able to grieve my mom

(30:56) Healing by finding biological family

(34:38) Stealing me from my mom

(36:12) #1 reason for child removal

(39:43) Why I do this work

Links

Follow us on social media: Twitter | Instagram | Tiktok

Credits

Special thanks to Samuel Oyedele for editing our podcast, support his work on Instagram or e-mail him at Drumaboyiglobal@gmail.com

44 episodes

#Self-Improvement #Society #Conversations #Adoption #Foster Care #Birth Mother #Abortion #Transracial #Family Policing #Abolition #Podcasting Education #Zaira #Adoptees #Child Welfare

All episodes

1
Adopted Twice: Kinship, Control, and the Cost of Silence 52:58

8 days ago52:58

52:58

In this episode of Adoptees Crossing Lines , Zaira sits down with Kat Shahinian-Buffa to explore the layers of secrecy, grief, and reclamation embedded in kinship adoption. From being adopted the day she was born to uncovering that her sister is also her cousin through a DNA test, Kat walks us through her journey of survival, family deception, and international discovery. Together, they dig into the ways adoption alters identity, why even kinship adoption can be deeply harmful, and what it means to raise yourself. In this episode, we cover: (00:20) Kat’s adoption story, growing up with five siblings, and being raised by her biological uncle’s wife. (06:54) Realizing the burden of being “chosen,” perfectionism, and being othered in her adoptive family. (17:37) How DNA tests blew open family secrets—including discovering her sister is also her cousin. (27:15) Why even kinship adoption isn’t inherently safer or healthier—and how it distorts medical history and relationships. (42:10) The long road to healing, mental health support, and raising yourself. Call To Action: Subscribe to Adoptees Crossing Lines wherever you listen to podcasts. Follow us on social media and Substack for more content and community: Website : adopteescrossinglines.com Instagram : @adopteescrossinglines BlueSky : adopteecrossing.bsky.social TikTok : @adopteescrossinglines_ Substack : Adoptees Crossing Lines Substack Connect with Kat Shahinian-Buffa: Instagram: @kadasarus BlueSky: @kadasaurus.bsky.social Work With Me: Email adopteescrossinglines@gmail.com for brand partnerships and business inquiries. Editing by J. Way (AV Editor) Special thanks to J. Way for editing this podcast. To collaborate with her, email jwayedits@gmail.com.…

1
Raised by Auntie, Called Mom: The Complicated Truth of Kinship Adoption 50:59

22 days ago50:59

50:59

In this powerful episode, attorney and pro-Black adoptee Aretha Frazier shares her story of being adopted by her aunt in a kinship placement that was far from simple. From navigating family loyalty and control to confronting abuse and the myth of gratitude, Aretha opens up about what it really meant to grow up in a household where blood ties didn’t guarantee safety or care. She and Zaira dive deep into the complexities of kinship adoption, family dynamics, and what it means to center adoptees—especially Black adoptees—in every conversation. This is a raw, necessary look at the assumptions we carry about family, care, and who gets to be believed.…

1
Surveillance, Saviors, and Screens: Media & Adoption with J Way 57:54

5 weeks ago57:54

57:54

In this episode of Adoptees Crossing Lines , Zaira is joined by her editor, cinephile, and dear friend J Way. Together, they dive into how adoption narratives are portrayed in film and television, from tropes like the “grateful orphan” to more realistic depictions of systemic harm. J Way shares their experience as a transracial adoptee, the cultural erasure they endured, and the healing power of chosen family, storytelling, and visual media. This powerful conversation unpacks the surveillance, silence, and saviorism that often surround adoption—and what it means to reclaim your story through art and truth. In this episode, we cover: (00:28) J Way’s story: growing up adopted with two sisters in a white household (03:11) Surveillance, culture loss, and being banned from speaking Spanish (05:33) How film became a safe space and helped process adoption trauma (08:49) Media critiques: from Queen’s Gambit tropes to Atlanta’s searing truths (14:52) Social media, saviorism, and adoption propaganda (31:38) Love beyond biology: Zaira’s documentary vision on family policing (37:33) The harm and manipulation of “open” adoptions (47:07) “It’s not about blood”: media rhetoric, savior narratives, and erasure Call To Action: Subscribe to Adoptees Crossing Lines on your favorite podcast platform. Follow us on social media, and subscribe to our Substack for deeper content and community. Website: adopteescrossinglines.com Instagram: @adopteescrossinglines TikTok: @adopteescrossinglines_ BlueSky: adopteecrossing.bsky.social Substack: Adoptees Crossing Lines Substack Connect with J Way: TikTok: @its_yagirl_jway Bluesky: @itsjway.bsky.social Work With Me: Email adopteescrossinglines@gmail.com for brand partnerships, sponsorships, or collaboration inquiries. Editing by J Way Special thanks to J Way for editing this episode. To collaborate with her, email jwayedits@gmail.com.…

1
Mutual Aid as Resistance: Building Systems of Care 20:41

7 weeks ago20:41

20:41

In this solo episode of Adoptees Crossing Lines , Zaira dives deep into the power and necessity of mutual aid. Drawing from personal reflection, historical examples like the Black Panther Party and the Young Lords, and global efforts from Sudan to Florida, this episode highlights how mutual aid has always been about survival. Zaira explores how mutual aid rejects systems of exploitation and centers community care as a form of resistance—especially for marginalized communities continuously neglected by the state. In this episode, we cover: (00:20) What mutual aid is, how it differs from charity, and why it’s essential for survival. (05:13) Historical examples of mutual aid in action—from the Black Panther Party to the Young Lords. (12:35) How mutual aid shows up today across the globe and in local communities. (17:36) The call to practice mutual aid in our daily lives and how storytelling is a form of digital resistance. Call To Action: Subscribe to Adoptees Crossing Lines wherever you listen to podcasts, follow us on social media, and subscribe to our Substack for more content and community: Website: adopteescrossinglines.com Instagram: @adopteescrossinglines BlueSky: adopteecrossing.bsky.social TikTok: @adopteescrossinglines_ Substack: Adoptees Crossing Lines Substack Listen to these episodes next: Community: A powerful solo episode exploring the importance of community for adoptees and system-impacted people—how it’s built, sustained, and why it’s critical for healing. Work With Me: Email adopteescrossinglines@gmail.com for brand partnerships and business inquiries. Editing by J. Way (AV Editor) Special thanks to J. Way for editing the podcast. To collaborate with her, email her at jwayedits@gmail.com.…

1
Adoptee Storytelling & Film Advocacy 59:44

9 weeks ago59:44

59:44

Adoptee Storytelling & Film Advocacy In this episode of Adoptees Crossing Lines, Zaira sits down with Alexandra, a British and American domestic transracial adoptee who grew up in her birth country of Hong Kong. Alexandra is the festival director of the Adoptee Film Fest , a global in-person and online film festival amplifying adoptee-centered films by adoptee filmmakers. They discuss her journey of navigating identity, community, and storytelling, and how the Adoptee Film Fest came to be. Alexandra shares her experience of growing up in a segregated society, her birth search, and the importance of creating adoptee-centered spaces in media. In this episode, we cover: (00:20) Introduction to Alexandra and her background as a British and American domestic transracial adoptee. (03:13) The impact of growing up in Hong Kong and navigating identity in a segregated society. (10:19) Alexandra’s birth search journey and the challenges of finding community and validation. (20:27) The inception of the Adoptee Film Fest and its importance for the adoptee community. (27:37) The role of storytelling and community building through film. (38:03) Alexandra’s reflections on adoptee representation in media and future plans for the Adoptee Film Fest. Call To Action: Subscribe to Adoptees Crossing Lines wherever you listen to podcasts, follow us on social media, and subscribe to our Substack for more content and community: Website: adopteescrossinglines.com Instagram: @adopteescrossinglines BlueSky: adopteecrossing.bsky.social TikTok: @adopteescrossinglines_ Substack: Adoptees Crossing Lines Substack Work With Me: Email adopteescrossinglines@gmail.com for brand partnerships and business inquiries. Editing by J. Way (AV Editor) Special thanks to J. Way for editing the podcast. To collaborate with her, email her at jwayedits@gmail.com .…

1
Root Work and Resilience: The Fight for Black Families 47:25

10 weeks ago47:25

47:25

Root Work and Resilience: The Fight for Black Families In this episode of Adoptees Crossing Lines , Zaira sits down with Tamara and Tracey Robertson, sisters, healers, and advocates serving as Healers in Residence with Movement for Family Power. Together, they discuss their journey of resisting the harms of the family policing system, while centering Black birth traditions, ancestral wisdom, and community healing. From childhood foundations of faith and service to their powerful doula work, this conversation is a testament to the resilience and power of Black families protecting their own. In this episode, we cover: (03:03) What led Tamara and Tracey to do the healing work they do today. (07:41) Their introduction to the family policing system and how it fueled their advocacy. (16:02) Tamara’s story of caring for her brother and keeping him out of the system. (22:04) Doula work and challenges Black families face during pregnancy, birth, and postpartum care. (32:10) The erasure of Black birth traditions and the need for advocacy in hospital settings. (39:32) What it means to be a Healer in Residence with Movement for Family Power and disrupting the family policing system through love and community. Call To Action: Subscribe to Adoptees Crossing Lines wherever you listen to podcasts, follow us on social media, and subscribe to our Substack for more content and community: Website: adopteescrossinglines.com Instagram: @adopteescrossinglines BlueSky: adopteecrossing.bsky.social TikTok: @adopteescrossinglines_ Substack: Adoptees Crossing Lines Substack Connect with Tamara Robertson: Instagram: @queeeentam Email: healer@movementforfamilypower.org Movement for Family Power: movementforfamilypower.org Listen to these episodes next: Alan’s Episode : An insightful conversation with Alan, an abolitionist and advocate deeply rooted in efforts to dismantle the family policing system. Alan shares their journey of understanding the harmful impacts of the system, their personal experiences, and their vision for transformative change. Dorothy Roberts’ Episode : A powerful interview with Dorothy Roberts, acclaimed scholar and author of Torn Apart . Dorothy discusses the historical and present-day harms of the family policing system, offering a compelling argument for abolition and highlighting how systemic racism continues to harm Black families. Work With Me: Email adopteescrossinglines@gmail.com for brand partnerships and business inquiries. Editing by J. Way (AV Editor) Special thanks to J. Way for editing the podcast. To collaborate with her, email her at jwayedits@gmail.com.…

1
Adoption, Privilege, and the Stories We Tell w/ Patrick Armstrong 51:28

13 weeks ago51:28

51:28

In this episode, we explore the complexities of adoption, privilege, and the narratives that shape our understanding of family. Through personal stories and critical reflections, we unpack the ways in which adoption is often framed as an unquestionable good while overlooking the systemic issues at play. We discuss the intersection of race, class, and power in adoption, the impact on adoptees, and the importance of centering their voices. This conversation challenges dominant narratives and invites listeners to consider the broader implications of adoption beyond individual experiences.…

1
Adoptee Identity & Research: Roots and Self-Discovery with Annalisa Toccara-Jones 50:18

15 weeks ago50:18

50:18

Send us a text

1
Reflections on Grief, Healing, and Honoring My Mom 19:15

18 weeks ago19:15

19:15

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1
The Role of Legal Advocacy in Family Reunification w/ Keshia Adeniyi 46:02

46 weeks ago46:02

46:02

Send us a text Keshia The child welfare system is waging war on Black families, and Keshia Adeniyi-Dorsey is on the front lines. In this episode, she shares her journey from foster child to family defender, exposing the racist roots of CPS and the urgent need for change. Keisha breaks down her tactics for protecting families during CPS investigations, from refusing home entry to shutting down fishing expeditions. Her success rates are fantastic: 95.8% of parental rights protected and 93.7% of families reunified. "We already know, and we've already done in the past, like, right? Like, took care of ourselves, we took care of everybody else's kids too, right? We don't need the system to do it." What we discussed (00:23) Meet Keshia Adeniyi-Dorsey (01:37) Adoptions and Safe Families Act (06:08) Reality of CPS investigations (12:17) Protecting families during CPS investigations (17:11) Reuniting 93.7% of families (23:46) Challenges of advocating for families OR Dealing with incompetence (28:56) We don’t need police for that OR The color of the system OR Black families don’t need CPS OR We don’t need help OR Not everyone needs help (35:33) Affording counsel (43:39) Truth to power Links Connect with Keshia: Website | LinkedIn Follow us on social media: Twitter | Instagram | Tiktok Credits Special thanks to Samuel Oyedele for editing our podcast, support his work on Instagram or e-mail him at Drumaboyiglobal@gmail.com…

1
Exploring Abolition, Intergenerational Trauma, and Creative Resistance w/ Benjamin Lundberg Torres Sánchez 54:17

48 weeks ago54:17

54:17

Send us a text Benjamin Words matter. Especially when it comes to adoption. Benjamin Lundberg Torres Sanchez isn't just "adopted" - they were separated from their first family for 28 years. In this episode, we unpack how the language we use shapes our understanding of adoption. Benjamin shares their journey of rejecting industry terminology and embracing more accurate descriptions of their experience. We discuss how this shift in language opens up new possibilities for solidarity and political action. "I think it's just really important to name what happened to us." What we discussed (00:22) Who is Benjamin Lundberg Torres Sanchez? (01:41) Conceived in violence (04:58) Adoption day (07:23) Good experiences but still angry OR Good vs. bad adoptions (10:10) Learning to think critically about adoption OR Language of adoption (14:35) Being hungry for community OR Availability of light skinned children (18:56) Not only focusing on adoptees OR Adoptees are not alone (26:46) Organized abandonment (28:30) We Are Holding This Magazine (37:46) Intersectionality vs. isolation (44:12) Finding alternative power brokers OR Finding power brokers (48:14) Get curious (51:32) Support Benjamin Links We Are Holding This Magazine Benjamin’s website Follow us on social media: Twitter | Instagram | Tiktok…

1
Unpacking Adoption w/ Henry: Identity, Community, and Healing 37:38

50 weeks ago37:38

37:38

Send us a text Henry What happens when a Black child is adopted into a white Mormon family? The Mormon church silenced Henry's identity as a Black transracial adoptee, but he's done being quiet. From "colorblind" racism to the weight of forced gratitude, he exposes the ugly truth behind his adoption. We explore the impact of media representation, the importance of acknowledging adoptee anger, and why abolishing the current system might be the only way forward. Henry shares his journey of finding community with other adoptees and reclaiming his voice. "My life was really to fill this hole in my parents' life instead of my parents being there to raise children. What we discussed (00:22) Who is Henry? (01:48) Coming out of the fog (03:52) Adopted through the mormon church (06:34) Growing up with adopted sisters (08:26) Adoptees vs. adoptive parents on This is Us OR Adoptees vs. Adoptive parents on TV (13:23) Expectation of gratefulness OR “I want someone to love me” (20:26) Being allowed to feel & express (23:21) Alternatives to family policing OR Mind your own business (26:02) Relationship with adoptive parents while being abolitionist (32:27) Find your inner voice Links Black Adoptee Facebook Group Follow us on social media: Twitter | Instagram | Tiktok Credits Special thanks to Samuel Oyedele for editing our podcast, support his work on Instagram or e-mail him at Drumaboyiglobal@gmail.com…

1
Adoption, Therapy, and Self-Discovery: Fai Knudson's Story 53:34

1 year ago53:34

53:34

Send us a text Fai Knudson Fai Knudson grew up in a white, conservative town, always feeling different. As a biracial, transracial adoptee, Faye faced racism and isolation. Leaving their hometown ignited a journey of self-discovery, leading to advocacy and therapy focused on adoptee mental health. In this episode, Fai shares their powerful story, the challenges of being a transracial adoptee, and how they now help others navigate similar paths. What we discussed (00:18) Who is Fai Knudson? (04:05) Feeling different (05:32) Not allowed to read adoption paperwork (06:30) Coming out of the fog (09:11) Studying adoption for master’s (13:53) Adoptee therapists (21:32) Adoptee care is neglected (28:12) Story behind “Good Faith Therapy” (33:20) Support for adoptees (35:01) Genetic graveyard (36:24) Finding an adoptee affirming therapist (39:34) Partial reunion (47:54) Finding your authentic self Links Connect with Fai Knudson: LinkedIn Good Faith Therapy Website | Good Faith Therapy Instagram Peer Support Space Grow Beyond Words Journey of The Adopted Self Psychology Today Follow us on social media: Twitter | Instagram | Tiktok Credits Special thanks to Samuel Oyedele for editing our podcast, support his work on Instagram or e-mail him at Drumaboyiglobal@gmail.com…

1
Finding Freedom: Reflections on One Year of No Contact 46:06

1 year ago46:06

46:06

Send us a text 1 Year of No Contact It's been 365 days since I cut ties with my adopters to protect myself. A year of healing, self-discovery, and finding my voice. In this episode, I share my no contact journey, the reasons behind my decision, the process of healing, and the freedom I’ve found. Hear my story of setting boundaries, seeking safety, and reclaiming my identity. What we discussed (00:24) 1 year of no contact (01:50) “but they’re your parents” OR Expectation to be grateful (04:17) How I felt after no contact (06:21) Family policing gaslit me (11:20) Forgiveness as a weapon (14:36) Becoming free, finally (18:01) Getting tattoos (& my favorite one) (20:26) Being able to grieve my mom (30:56) Healing by finding biological family (34:38) Stealing me from my mom (36:12) #1 reason for child removal (39:43) Why I do this work Links Follow us on social media: Twitter | Instagram | Tiktok Credits Special thanks to Samuel Oyedele for editing our podcast, support his work on Instagram or e-mail him at Drumaboyiglobal@gmail.com…

1
Operation Stop CPS w/ Amanda Wallace 36:02

1 year ago36:02