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06 | On Trying To Save Everyone
Manage episode 361739137 series 3459665
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This episode is about reframing generosity. As high achievers, the temptation to help everyone looking for mentorship is strong. Many of us get trapped in this version of generosity that has us spread thin, trying to do the best we can for everyone. All of these mentorships take up time and energy that could have been spent on our core vision - the passion that has propelled us to the top of our fields.
I know how tempting it is to say yes to everyone asking for help. But if we want to continue growing and expanding, we must shift our mindset on giving.
Generosity is not about how much you give. Generosity is about how well you give. Ask yourself: “What’s at risk for me if I give to this person and what’s at risk for them if I say yes?” It’s not always about filling in the gaps with little ways that you can help people here and there and spreading yourself thin. It’s about keeping your eye on the prize and putting energy in places that drive your mission and goals.
GEMS DROPPED
“...because of the structural barriers, there's no one above us. And so we feel once we get to these levels, it's like, well, I didn't have anyone to look up to. I'm now the person I wish I had been back then. So I owe it to this young, bright mind …to take the phone call to say you know what, go ahead and send me your resume. Yeah, you know, go ahead and send me your portfolio. You know what, I'll find some time in my calendar, reach out to my assistant, you're just saying yes to everybody. And look, I want you all to understand, sometimes you're gonna say, Yes but it has to be filtered through a set of criteria that you have determined for yourself that it incorporates, and really, I think, at its foundation is about protecting who you are most meant to be showing up in the world”.
“...we got to stop trying to save everyone, and losing ourselves in the process and losing our big pictures in the process. It's not a strike against you to have boundaries in this way…we mistake generosity for spreading ourselves out. And that generosity actually has nothing to do with giving a lot. It's not about the amount of giving that you do but about the number of people that you give to and how much you give them. Generosity is about quality. Generosity is about how well you give. Generosity is not about how much you give, it is about how well you give. And what happens is we get into this practice of giving ourselves away”.
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