172 American Pie 1999

Does This Still Work?

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You know this one, the guy has sex with a pie. He also commits what wean act of criminal cyber-voyeurism. So, you know, not the best. But despite that will the boys still think this works?

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Cold Open Lyrics

To the tune of Flagpole Sitta by Harvey Danger

Pacts are really lazy ways to

Tie together ends of a story

Deals and bets are just boring

Tropes to pull a groan out of me

Never met a teenager so

focused on just getting their dick wet

We all just got what we could get

And fought our adolescent acne

on our face

(And rarely ever won)

I watched it now I'm not well

But that's all right, I'm here to tell

Broadcasting consentless masturbation

Has to be so illegal

Despite her looking so regal

Her scholarship is lost over this

Molesting pastry in the kitchen

K I guess that joke is still funny

Cuz' Eugene Levy is lovely

And not because of Jim, Jason Biggs

Or Apple Pie

Joe watched it and he's not well

Not from the film, it’s just his health

I watched it and I'm not well

My mental health, is mental hell

Yeah, it’s a parody

But that doesn’t mean

There is no real critique

Of the original song line

‘Bout breeding people’s minds

It’s meaner than required

Back to American Pie

I’ll summarize

This movie is a textbook case of

Using all the bodily juices

To distract from abuses

Of every trope the movie could throw, into a hole

Watching bad behavior get

rewarded or forgiven’s so boring

There I said it it’s boring

It’s neither ironic, nor edgy, it’s pathetic!

Joe watched it and he's not well

Not from the film, it’s just his health

I watched it and I'm not well

My mental health, is mental hell

Does. This. Still. Work.

222 episodes

#Cinema #George Romaka & Joe Dixon #George Romaka #Joe Dixon #Critique #Film #Review #Comedy