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81 - Exploit Your Poverty (feat. Chris Hedges)
Manage episode 388028310 series 3309968
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Now I get it. Candy Crush is violent, complex, and takes literally thousands of hours to master. But let me tell you: it is worth it. I just started playing Candy Crush on my PC, and the graphics are just so good. I mean, some level 1 carpenters like Fortnite, and some level 50 mafia bosses play Minecraft. But only level 3000 supreme pewds-level beings can understand the brilliance behind this game. I mean, the 3D graphics make me feel like Iโm actually in Vietnam. In fact, the other day, I got this crazy Candy Crush PTSD as I thought about all the honorable Soviet comrades I had lost in the war for r/unexpectedcommunism. Well anyway, thanks for understanding my meth addiction, and I hope all of you can see Candy Crush the way that I do.
I'm supposed to be playing FarmVille but this one player keeps cutting my grass!
Is it TheMexican27?
Yeah, TheMexican27!
Who is TheMexican27?
Some say TheMexican27 is the first Farmville player ever, born from Latin America.
I heard TheMexican27 can cut grass better by hand than a lawnmower.
I heard TheMexican27 can cut an entire field of grass with a single blow.
But the worst part is, just when you think you're safe, just when you think you might escape; WHAM!!! Just like that!
YOUR FRONT YARD HAS BEEN TRIMMED What!? No no no no no no no no!
BUSHES UNDER ATTACK That's impossible!
YOUR LAWNMOWER HAS BEEN CAPTURED TheMexican27 has captured my lawnmower!
Mine too!
Aw, you guys, I'm sure it's not that bad!
You have no idea what just happened.
I might have some idea...
"Welcome back, TheMexican27"
FarmVille: Play for free on the app store.
I๐จam a๐ ๐ฎGAMER๐ฎ, not๐ซ๐ because I๐คdon't have a lifeโฎ๏ธ๐ but๐because I๐ฎ hate๐ โWOMENโ and ๐ฉ๐ฟMINORITIES๐ฆ๐ฟ
๐๐I ๐ฎplay๐ฉgirl๐ฉcharacters ๐for the ๐PLOT!๐๐ค๐ค
I๐โam๐ โโNOT๐ซa๐pervert๐ซ๐ฆ, I ๐คฌswear!๐ณ
๐ฎ GAMERS ๐ฎ hate โ women ๐ฉ๐ป๐ฉ๐ผ๐ฉ๐ฝwhether ๐ฆ it is justified โ or not โ๏ธ
LISTEN ๐ฃ๐๐จHERE ๐ค๐ค๐ฒVERONICA๐ง๐ฉ, IF YOU๐ REJECT ๐ญ๐ข๐ขโนME๐น๐ฎ FROM ๐๐DATING๐๐๐ ๐ก๐ข YOU AGAIN๐ฉ๐ฉ, I'LL ๐น๐นREJECT ๐๐๐กYOU ๐ฉ๐ง๐งFROM๐ ๐ LIFE๐ก๐ซ๐ซโโ
Gamers ๐๐ฎ are ๐ arguably one ๐๐ of the most ๐ persecuted classes in ๐ข๐ history. ๐ค๐ Unlike minorities, nobody ๐ โ has ever received ๐ซ a ๐๐ฐ job ๐ผ or ๐ฎ๐ scholarship solely because ๐ they're ๐ a ๐ gamer. ๐ฎ In ๐ fact, there ๐๐ has ๐ณโ never โโฎ even ๐โฏ been ๐น๐น the opportunity ๐๐ for ๐ a ๐ฅ gamer ๐ to ๐ฆ self-identify ๐ฏ as such ๐ on any ๐ฑ sort of ๐ฆ๐ซ job application, college ๐ฅ application, or ๐๐ก standardized test ๐ฌ๐ฌ form. Furthermore, whereas minorities ๐ด are widely considered ๐ค to ๐ ๐ด embody coolness and ๐ฐ attractiveness by virtue of their ๐โญ race, โ๐ gamers have ๐โ been โ historically stereotyped as nerdy and unattractive since ๐จ๐จ the dawn of ๐ฟ our ๐ craft. When โฐ๐ฆ minorities ๐ต speak ๐ out ๐ in the media about ๐ฆ๐ฆ whitewashing, appropriation, and ๐ similar ๐ฑ intrusions into ๐ชโก their โ exclusive culture โฉ and values, ๐ฐ๐ฐ they ๐ป๐ฅ are ๐๐ฐ universally lauded. However, ๐ฏ๐ฏ when a ๐ฐ gamer raises a comparable concern ๐๐ about ๐ฆ our ๐๐ฐ community, ๐ฉ๐ฐ we ๐ฅ are ๐ข branded as ๐ฆ๐ฟ sexist, racist, misogynistic, and similar ๐ฑ slurs, and accused of ๐๐ overreacting. Gamers ๐๐ are ๐ฌ undeniably subject ๐ to ๐๐ป excessive and ๐๐ extremely โฃ๐ detrimental discrimination. ๐ฎ The same ๐ ฑโ cannot โ ๐ be said ๐ฆ for ๐๐ racial minorities.
Chicks๐๐ง๐ผthinking the green dude๐ฆ๐ผโ๏ธin Breath Of The Wildโ๏ธ๐ฌis called Zelda๐๐stop being posers๐ก๐ฉ๐๐ปeducate yourself๐๐his name is Luigi๐จ๐ป๐
Gamers ๐พ๐ฎ Rise ๐ช Up ๐! United ๐ค we ๐ strong ๐ช๐ก. Neckbeard ๐ง๐ฉ if alone ๐ฟ. It's stupid ๐คช you may say ๐ฃ. But ๐ games ๐พ are our ๐ช way ๐ .
DontMessWithUs! ๐ฎ๐ซ๐ฑ๐พ๐ช๐ฃ๐กHi๐! Few things โto start off with =] ๐ 1. Yes โ I added โ you ๐๐ค because โต you're ๐๐ค a female ๐บ gamer ๐ฎ๐ค, 'tis ๐ฉ an awesome ๐ค๐โโ๏ธ thing to see ๐! 2. I am Brian ๐๐ฆ. 3. do not๐ซ be intimidated ๐ฑ๐ฉ, but I am not ๐ซ ๐ โโ๏ธa stereotypical guy ๐ โโ๏ธ๐จโ๐ค. If anything ๐, I'll be the one ๐ฅ๐จโ๐ณ in the kitchen ๐จโ๐ณ ๐๐ฆ๐ฉ =D.
๐ My ๐ name ๐ is not ๐ important โ whatโis important โ is what โIm ๐ฑ๐ป going โถ๏ธ to 2๏ธโฃ do. ๐ I ๐ just fucking โ๏ธ hate ๐ก this world ๐ and the human ๐ฆ worms ๐ feasting ๐ on โฌ๏ธ its ๐ carcass. ๐ต my ๐ whole ๐ life ๐ถ is just ๐ พ๏ธ cold โ๏ธ bitter ๐ hatred ๐ and I ๐ฑ๐ป always wanted ๐ to 2๏ธโฃ die ๐ violently. ๐จ this is ๐ the time โฑ of vengeance ๐ and no ๐ค life ๐จ๐ปโ๐ผ is worth ๐ต saving ๐ฒ and I ๐ will put ๐ค in๐ the grave โฐ๏ธ as many ๐จโ๐ฉโ๐งโ๐ฆ as I ๐คcan โบ๏ธits๐ time โ๏ธ for me ๐ถ to ๐ป kill ๐ก and it's ๐ time โฒ for me ๐ to 2๏ธโฃ dieโ๏ธ my๐โโ๏ธ genocide ๐ crusade ๐โโ๏ธ begins๐ here๐
To ๐ ๐ ฑe fair โ, you ๐ have to ๐ have a very ๐ high โฌ IQ ๐to provide players ๐ฎwith a ๐ sense ๐ฅ of pride ๐บ๐ธ and accomplishment ๐. The unlocks ๐ are extremely ๐ฏ su๐ ฑtle ๐ถ, and without ๐ฏ a solid ๐ฑ grasp ๐ of selecting ๐ initial ๐ต values ๐ ๐ ฑased upon ๐ data ๐ from the Open ๐ฏ ๐ ฑeta, ๐ ฑattlefront 2โฃ will go โฉ over โซ a typical ๐ gamers ๐ฎ head ๐. There's also โ EA's other ๐ adjustments ๐ง made to ๐ฏ milestone ๐ rewards ๐ ๐ ฑefore ๐ launch ๐, which are ๐ฏ deftly ๐ฏ woven ๐ into this game ๐ฎ development ๐ฌ- the game's ๐ฎ philosophy ๐ญ draws ๐จheavily ๐จ from average ๐ per-player ๐ฎ credit ๐ณ earn ๐ต rates ๐, for instance ๐ฏ. The gamers ๐ฎ understand ๐ this stuff ๐; they have ๐ the intellectual ๐ capacity ๐พ to truly ๐ฏ appreciate ๐ that we'll ๐ ฑe ๐making ๐จ constant ๐ adjustments ๐, to realise ๐ that it's not ๐ just fun ๐- they say ๐ something deep ๐ฉ a๐ ฑout ๐ฎ๐ฎ GAMES ๐ฎ๐ฎ. As a ๐ consequence ๐people ๐จโโค๏ธโ๐โ๐จ who dislike ๐ฏ E๐ ฐ truly ARE โ idiots๐๐๐ - of course ๐ they wouldn't ๐ appreciate ๐, for instance ๐ฏ, that we ๐ฐ ensure ๐ that players ๐ฎ have challenges ๐ that are ๐ฏ compelling ๐, rewarding ๐, and ๐ of ๐ course ๐ attainable ๐ . I'm smirking ๐๐๐ right now ๐ฏ just imagining ๐ฌ one of ๐ฏ those a๐ ฑ๐ ฑlepated ๐ simpletons ๐ scratching ๐จ their heads ๐ in confusion ๐ต as Mat Everett's genius ๐ฌ wit ๐ฌ unfolds ๐ itself on ๐ฏ their computer ๐บ screens ๐บ. What fools ๐.. how I pity ๐ซ them. ๐ And โ yes ๐ , ๐ ฑy ๐ฐ the ๐ฐ way, i DO ๐have a Mass ๐จ๏ธ Effect tattoo ๐จ. And no ๐, you cannot ๐ see ๐๏ธ it. It's for appreciative ๐ฏ gamers' ๐ฎ eyes ๐ญ only- and even ๐ then they ๐ฏ have to ๐ demonstrate ๐ฎ that they're ๐ฉโ๐ฉโ๐งโ๐ฆ within ๐ 5โฃ IQ ๐ points ๐ of my own ๐ (preferably lower โฌ) ๐ ฑeforehand ๐. Nothin personnel kid ๐
Hey theyre GAMERS!!:๐ ๐ ๐ just wanted๐ to let yall all know๐ that if i ๐ซ dontโ talk๐ ๐ค for a while ๐ฅ , it's probably ๐ค think b'cuz ๐ i ๐ tried to ๐ commit ๐ ๐ฑ suicide!!! ๐ I may have ๐ฆ succeeded, but ๐ I will just ๐ค probably ๐ ฑ in a ๐ค mental ๐ค ๐ฅ hospital!! Just remember to ๐ ๐ ๐ฆ SMASH ๐ฏ that motherfuccing like ๐ button, and leave :๐ a comment in the section ๐ below
While most ๐ฏ teens ๐ฆ๐ฆ get caught ๐ต๐ต๐จ watching ๐ NAUGHTY ๐ณ๐ VIDEOS ๐ฝ๐บ late at night ๐๐๐ I get caught ๐ต๐จ๐ต playing VIDEO GAMES ๐ฒ๐ LIKE ๐๐ AND RT ๐๐ AND SHARE ๐๐AND FOLLOW๐๐๐ IF YOU'RE A TRUE ๐๐ฉ๐ EPIC CHRISTIAN ๐ฟ๐๐ GAMER ๐๐๐๐๐
Excuse me๐ฒ m'lady๐, but is that a Nintendo 3โDS๐ฒโ๏ธ? I appreciate ๐that a woman๐โโ๏ธ such as yourself ๐ฑis trying to get into gaming๐ฑ and I think that's great๐คฃ. But you can'tโ call๐ yourself a gamer๐ค like me ๐คฃunless you carry๐ฃ your 15lb ๐ชalienware ๐ฝlaptop๐ป with mouse๐ฒ and headphones ๐งwherever you go๐. As a true๐ gamer,๐ค I am of the most elite๐ so I understand that blank stare๐ you're giving ๐ me๐คฃ. I'll tell๐โโ๏ธ you what though, if you๐คฆโโ๏ธ ever want to be my pocket ๐healer๐ in ๐ซOverwatch๐ซ, you can addโ me. My username๐ is ๐Thunder_Rafiki_God ๐and I'm in low gold๐ due to shit๐ฉ teammates๐คท๐ฟโโ๏ธ๐คท๐ฟโโ๏ธ๐คท๐ฟโโ๏ธ๐คท๐ฟโโ๏ธ๐คท๐ฟโโ๏ธ.
iPhone ๐ฑ is ๐ฆ the ๐ best ๐ console, and ๐ nobody could ๐ ever ๐ fucking ๐ speak ๐ against ๐ซ it. ๐ฏ When ๐ I ๐ first ๐ got ๐ธ an ๐น iPhone, ๐ฑ I ๐ was ๐ so ๐ฏ excited ๐ that ๐ I ๐ wouldn't ๐ฉ be ๐ trashy anymore. ๐ฅ I ๐ got ๐ธ so ๐ฏ many ๐ฌ friends ๐ซ with ๐ the ๐ iPhone ๐ฑ 5C's stunning colors and ๐ sexyness, and ๐ that ๐ isn't even ๐ half ๐ of ๐ฆ it. ๐ฏ It ๐ฏ has ๐ over ๐ 30 ๐ GB worth ๐ธ of ๐ฆ data. ๐ I ๐ was ๐ able ๐ช to ๐ฆ store, ๐ช if ๐ I ๐ recall, ๐ 10,000 photos ๐ท and ๐ it ๐ฏ would ๐ช only ๐ฆ take ๐ up ๐บ 4 ๐ฆ gigabytes. It ๐ฏ would ๐ช play ๐ฎ games ๐ฎ that ๐ would ๐ช seem laggy to ๐ฆ a ๐ console and ๐ turn ๐ it ๐ฏ into ๐ a ๐ lagless portable experience. ๐ I ๐ am ๐ a ๐ true ๐ฏ fucking ๐ gamer, ๐ I ๐ play ๐ฎ Angry ๐ก Birds, ๐ Fruit ๐ Ninja, Flappy Bird, ๐ฃ and ๐ Clash of ๐ฆ Clans daily, ๐ข I ๐ can ๐ฆ message ๐ง friends ๐ซ and ๐ stay ๐ up ๐บ to ๐ฆ date, ๐ I ๐ can ๐ฆ talk ๐ฌ to ๐ฆ people ๐จ with ๐ my ๐จ face ๐ and ๐ always ๐ฅ remember ๐ญ how ๐ฏ my ๐จ friends ๐ซ looked ๐ like, ๐ I ๐ can ๐ฆ take ๐ endless photos ๐ท with ๐ no ๐ worry ๐ about ๐ฆ using ๐ป data, ๐ and ๐ I ๐ could ๐ browse infinite pages of ๐ฆ the ๐ internet, ๐ป which ๐ a ๐ shitty ๐ฉ console can't ๐ซ do. ๐ The ๐ PC, Wii, PS4, and ๐ Xbox 1 ๐ can't ๐ซ do ๐ any ๐ฆ of ๐ฆ this ๐ shit. ๐ฉ Compete ๐ฏ with ๐ that, ๐ consoletards. Also, ๐จ nice ๐ฅ trolling fucko, with ๐ you're ๐ not ๐ซ including you're ๐ fucking ๐ iPhone, ๐ฑ get ๐ your ๐ facts strate Android fuckers ๐
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