Flex Your Feelings podcast

53:29

In this episode we explore the complexities of being human first and then being a professional second. Sam talks about how he is himself first and then a life coach second. We discuss the importance of owning one's humanness, and the continuous journey of growth. Sam shares his personal experiences, such as the need for external validation, and the impact of family dynamics on self-worth, and much more. The theme of this conversation centres around the idea of what it means to “have your shit together” and how this is defined, from Sam's perspective. Chapters 00:00 Navigating Teenage Distress 24:14 The Challenge of social media 50:35 The Importance of Being Real 53:27 Reflections on Personal Growth 55:03 Defining 'Having Your Shit Together' Keywords mental health, wellness, coaching, personal growth, self-discovery, validation, human experience, helping professions,emotional well-being, journey, self-perception, external validation, therapy, vulnerability, authenticity…

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Lottie Passell-Syms: Expert Advice On Intimacy, Sex & Relationships 1:34:49

4 weeks ago1:34:49

1:34:49

In this episode, we welcome intimacy and relationship specialist Lottie Passell-Syms. We discuss the importance of communication in relationships, the changing landscape of dating, and the need for empathy and connection. Lottie shares insights from her twenty years of experience in the field, emphasizing the significance of understanding each other's needs and expectations. This episode provides valuable insights into fostering healthier relationships and understanding individual needs.Chapters 00:00 Introduction to the Podcast and Guest 00:53 Understanding Intimacy and Relationships 03:09 Changing Landscape of Dating and Relationships 05:58 Communication in Relationships 11:49 Expectations and Needs in Relationships 18:11 The Role of Empathy and Connection 24:01 Navigating Power Dynamics in Relationships 35:22 Redefining Generational Stereotypes in Relationships 39:06 The Dynamics of Relationship Roles 43:33 Navigating Childhood Scripts in Adult Relationships 49:11 Exploring the Importance of Sexual Communication 55:12 The Role of Anticipation and Playfulness in Sex 01:01:32 Breaking Taboos: The Conversation Around Masturbation 01:05:53 Understanding Limerence and Love 01:11:52 The Power Struggle in Relationships 01:17:20 Forgiveness and Conscious Uncoupling 01:23:22 Communication and Relationship Maintenance 01:29:00 Keeping Your Heart Open After Breakups Keywords intimacy, relationships, dating, communication, empathy,expectations, needs, power dynamics, connection, sex, relationships, communication, intimacy, therapy, sexual health, gender roles, emotional safety, childhood scripts, sexual exploration, consent, limerence, love, relationships, forgiveness, communication, conscious uncoupling, emotional health, couples therapy, intimacy, personal growth Website: www.lottiepassellsyms.com IG: @lottiepassellsyms…

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Our Lovely Listeners: Your Questions Answered 1:00:22

13 weeks ago1:00:22

1:00:22

In this episode, we explore and answer questions from you, our lovely listeners, on varying themes surrounding mental health, personal growth, and relationships. We discuss the ability to change one's mindset, the impact of our environment on personal development, and the importance of openness in relationships. We share our personal preferences regarding intimacy; our culinary preferences for a ‘last meal on Earth’; our chosen dinner party guests for a fictional dinner party; and Sam reveals his personal 'ick' list that highlights what he finds off-putting in relationships. Chapters 00:00 Introduction and Episode Overview 02:56 Mindset and Personal Growth 05:54 The Power of Change and Neuroplasticity 09:13 The Role of Environment in Shaping Mindset 11:58 Personal Experiences and Influences 14:47 Exploring Intimacy and Relationships 18:00 Influences in Life and Relationships 20:49 Death Row Meal: A Lighthearted Question 30:22 Culinary Delights: A Last Meal on Earth 36:56 Dinner Party Guests: Living, Dead, and Fictional 54:21 The ick List: What Turns Us Off 01:00:04 Closing Thoughts and Future Connections…

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Tis The Season: How To Stay Positive In Winter & More 1:01:38

17 weeks ago1:01:38

1:01:38

In this episode, we discuss the challenges of transitioninginto the season of winter and the importance of maintaining a positive mindset. We briefly discuss SAD and we talk about the concept of the 'Winter Arc,' a trending self-development initiative that encourages individuals to set personal goals and focus on self-improvement during the winter months. We discuss the importance of personal accountability, the psychology behind goal setting, and the challenges faced during the holiday season, particularly regarding fitness and personal choices. We delve into the complexities of holiday food traditions and the societal pressures surrounding New Year's resolutions. We talk about the nature of change, the impact of hitting rock bottom, and the statistics behind NY resolutions. We also discuss practical tips for maintaining well-being during the winter months and the significance of embracing change. Chapters 00:00 Introduction and Initial Banter 06:01 Winter Mindset and Seasonal Changes 11:54 Understanding Seasonal Affective Disorder 17:21 Setting Goals and Personal Accountability 24:52 Navigating the Holiday Season: Accountability andChoices 28:12 The Challenge of Holiday Indulgence 32:58 The Psychological Impact of Winter 36:47 Finding Joy Amidst Winter Blues 40:53 Holiday Traditions: The Pigs in Blankets Debate 41:57 The Psychology of New Year's Resolutions 42:49 The Importance of Change Anytime 43:46 Hitting Rock Bottom and Making Changes 44:41 The Statistics Behind Resolutions 45:52 Themes vs. Resolutions 46:52 The Concept of a New Year's Theme 47:51 Experiences Over Resolutions 48:41 Philosophy Shift in Goal Setting 49:51 Mitigating Failure in Goal Setting 50:57 Control Over Achievements…

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End Of Season One: A Game Of 'Ask Me Anything' 1:12:12

28 weeks ago1:12:12

1:12:12

In this episode of 'Flex Your Feelings', we reflect on our journey through the podcast's first season, discussing the importance of light-hearted conversations around serious topics. We play a fun game of 'Ask Me Anything' and then the conversation deepens as we talk about the answers which we give and the experiences behind them. We laugh together as we share our experiences with each other, and with you. Chapters Keywords mental health, wellness, podcast, relationships, personalgrowth, monogamy, emotional intelligence, sexuality, self-love, communication, emotional availability, gender stereotypes, action orientation, decisiveness,stubbornness, single behaviours, time travel, personal growth, future aspirations, happiness…

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Let's Talk About Sex 1:07:43

28 weeks ago1:07:43

1:07:43

In this episode, we delve into the complexities of sex, exploring themes of sex positivity, personal experiences, and the importance of communication in sexual relationships. We discuss the societal taboos surrounding sex, the role of consent and boundaries, and the significance of understanding kinks and fetishes. The conversation emphasizes the need for open dialogue about sexual preferences and experiences, highlighting that sex should be an enjoyable and fulfilling aspect of life. We emphasizes the need to move past shame associated with kinks and fetishes, advocating for a more positive and accepting view of sexual expression. We also critique the unrealistic expectations set by pornography and highlights the significance of healthy conversations about sex to foster intimacy and understanding between partners. Keywords: mental health, wellness, sex positivity, communication,emotional intelligence, kinks, fetishes, relationships, intimacy, validation,relationships, boundaries, openness, sex positivity, communication,pornography, kinks, fetishes, emotional connection, sexual expression…

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Social Expectations vs Personal Choices: You Do You 52:20

34 weeks ago52:20

52:20

In this episode, we delve into the complexities of social expectations versus personal choices. We explore how upbringing, particularly parental influences, shape our understanding of what is 'right' for us. The conversation highlights the detrimental effects of comparison, especially in the age of social media, and emphasie the importance of authenticity and self-discovery. We encourage you to prioritise your own needs and desires over societal pressures, advocating for a journey towards self-acceptance and personal growth. Chapters 00:00 Introduction and Setting the Topic 02:35 Comparing Yourself to Others and Social Expectations 08:22 Autonomy in Decision-Making 12:09 The Impact of Social Media on Comparison 18:23 Trusting Yourself and Making Personal Choices 25:56 Fear of Judgment and Hiding Personal Preferences 28:43 Embracing Authenticity and Celebrating Individuality 37:23 The Impact of Societal Expectations on Personal Choices 41:15 Navigating Social Media and Dealing with Judgment 49:02 The Importance of Self-Value and Prioritizing Yourself…

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The Pain And The Power Of Heartbreak: How To Survive 58:33

34 weeks ago58:33

58:33

In this episode of 'Flex Your Feelings', we delveinto the complex topic of heartbreak. We share our personal experiences, discussing the pain and transformative power that heartbreak can bring. Theconversation navigates through the stages of grief associated with heartbreak, the importance of self-reflection, and the necessity of taking time for oneself.We emphasize the significance of no contact post-breakup, the journey of self-improvement, and provide practical tips for healing. The episode concludeswith a message of hope, encouraging you to embrace your feelings and recognize the potential for growth after heartbreak. Chapters 00:00 Introduction and Personal Experiences with Heartbreak 03:01 The Negative and Positive Sides of Heartbreak 09:41 The Evolution of Heartbreak and Lessons Learned 15:25 The Intensity and Distortion of Heartbreak 20:15 The Importance of Healing and Self-Compassion 23:31 Navigating the Healing Process After Heartbreak 26:44 The Power of No Contact 33:30 Embodying the Qualities You Want in a Partner 39:23 Embracing the Power of Being Single 46:21 Investing in Yourself and Personal Growth 55:59 Stop Blaming Yourself and Focus on the Positives…

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Stress And Anxiety: How To Help Yourself 1:17:53

36 weeks ago1:17:53

1:17:53

In this episode, we discuss stress and anxiety. We talkabout the difference between stress and anxiety, with stress being a feeling state and anxiety being an emotion. We emphasize that stress and anxiety are natural parts of being human and cannot be completely eradicated. They also discuss the societal messages around stress and anxiety, with some viewing them as illnesses that need to be eliminated. Sam shares his personal experience ofrealizing that he created a lot of his own anxiety and stress. We highlight the importance of managing and coping with stress and anxiety rather than trying to eliminate them. Stress and anxiety can be both positive and negative, depending on perspective and the level of threat. It is subjective and varies from person to person. Overthinking and focusing on perceived threats can trigger stressand anxiety, even in safe situations. Planning and staying busy can help reduce anxiety by redirecting attention. However, it is important to not avoid or suppress emotions, but rather understand and process them. Self-awareness and therapy can help manage anxiety and stress by addressing the underlying triggers. Stress and anxiety can be debilitating experiences that can damagepeople's lives. It is important to educate people about what stress and anxiety are and how to navigate them. Society has gone through cycles of not talkingabout feelings to talking about them and now back to not talking about them. Some people make their anxiety or other mental health diagnoses their whole identity, which can be unhealthy. Stress and anxiety can be influenced by lifestyle factors, and it is important to address these factors before turning to medication. Taking personal responsibility and accountability for one's mental health is crucial for growth and development. The main takeaway is that talking about it is important, but action is also necessary for change. We discuss the idea that just talking about it is not enough and that taking steps to address the issue is crucial. We talk about being cautious not to against over-intellectualise and overthink stress and anxiety. One of the tips shared is to look up and gain perspective to help alleviate stress and anxiety. We discuss the statistical improbability of being born and how this perspective can help shift one's mindset. We emphasize the importance of taking responsibility forone's own well-being and seeking a healthier perspective. We also discuss the power of observation and learning from others who handle stress and anxiety well. Finally, we discuss the use of positive mantras or affirmations to shiftperspective and promote a sense of well-being. Helpful links: Samaritans: 116 123 Mind Support Line: 0300 102 1234 In an emergency, call: 999 Lots of other helpful information about stress and anxiety is available online.…

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Modern Dating: First Dates Hints & Tips 1:11:14

36 weeks ago1:11:14

1:11:14

In this episode, we discuss first dates and share our tips and some stories. We emphasize the importance of meeting in person as quickly as possible after initial virtual contact. We also touch on the topic of sleeping together on a first date and the concept of virtual dates. The conversation explores the idea of meeting someone in person relatively quickly after matching on a dating app. It emphasizes the importance of turning virtual connections into tangible relationships. We discuss the concept of being open to going with the flow and not adhering to strict timelines or structures. We also touch on the hesitation some people have in giving out their phone numbers and the potential for ghosting in online dating. We share our perspectives on nerves before a first date and how personal development work can help build confidence. The conversation explores the concept of self worth and how it affects dating experiences. 00:00 The Challenges of Modern Dating 02:35 Tips and Do's and Don'ts for First Dates 04:27 Virtual Dates: Are They the Same as In-Person Dates? 07:19 The Timing and Dynamics of First Dates 10:12 Curiosity and Open-Mindedness in Meeting in Person 12:07 The Hierarchy of Communication Platforms 14:05 Dealing with Ghosting 17:22 Nerves and Excitement Before a First Date 19:05 Shifting Perspectives on Rejection 21:09 The Benefits of Casual Day Dates 22:04 Going for a Walk: A Natural and Relaxed First Date Option 23:57 Abrupt Departure Mid-Meal 29:01 The Impact of Different Settings 32:23 Avoiding Dinner Dates for First Dates 34:12 Navigating the Complexities of Modern Dating 36:33 Exploring Casual Sex in Dating 42:21 Challenges of Ending a First Date 44:27 Ending a Date Early with Honesty 47:44 Navigating the First Kiss 54:38 Don't Get Too Drunk on a First Date 59:00 Avoid Trying Too Hard to Impress 01:00:57 The Question of Who Should Pay on a First Date 01:03:44 Splitting the Bill 01:06:10 Setting Boundaries and Being Honest 01:08:56 Enjoying the Dating Process 01:10:56 Next Week's Episode: Stress and Anxiety…

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Men's Mental Health and Parenting with Elliot Burgess 1:15:59

37 weeks ago1:15:59

1:15:59

In this conversation, we discuss various topics related tomental health, parenting, and societal expectations. We touch on the challengesof being a single parent, the perception of men raising children, theimportance of self-development, and the impact of toxic masculinity. We alsodiscuss the role of feminism and the need for inclusivity while maintainingindividuality. The conversation highlights the need for balance andunderstanding in navigating modern societal norms. The principal themes of theconversation include the impact of technology on children, the importance ofhealthy relationships and identity formation, the role of therapy in personalgrowth, and the influence of parents as role models. Key takeaways include theneed for open communication with children, treating oneself with kindness andself-acceptance, and the power of positive role models. The conversationhighlights the importance of being present and emotionally supportive as aparent, and the impact of parental behaviour on children's development.…

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Loneliness vs Being Alone: What's The Difference? 51:50

39 weeks ago51:50

51:50

In this episode, the main topic of the conversation is loneliness, and we explore the difference between being alone and feeling lonely. We discuss the concept of monk mode and the benefits of taking time to be alone and work on oneself. We also touch on the psychological impact of being single and feeling lonely. We emphasize the importance of self-talk and being comfortable in one's own company. We discuss the role of micro connections in easing feelings of loneliness and building confidenc...…

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Modern Dating: A Dating App Survival Guide 45:48

1 year ago45:48

45:48

In this episode, we discuss modern dating and its impact on mental health. We explore the use of dating apps, the challenges of seeking external validation, and the importance of clear intentions. We also touch on the different experiences of dating apps in the heterosexual and LGBTQ+ communities, with a focus on Grindr. The conversation highlights the need for self-reflection and managing expectations when using dating apps. We emphasize the importance of being clear about intentions a...…

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Men's Mental Health: Are All Men Included? 55:08

1 year ago55:08

55:08

In this episode, we discuss men's mental health and the concept of toxic masculinity. We explore the assumptions and stereotypes associated with men's mental health, particularly focusing on heterosexual men. We discuss the importance of redefining masculinity and breaking free from societal expectations. Sam shares his personal journey of opening up about his feelings and the positive impact it has had on his life. We emphasise the need for men to not only talk about their feelings but also ...…

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Party Culture: Our Personal Journeys And Lessons Learned 45:53

1 year ago45:53