Exploring boarding school trauma and its impact on leadership and society

From Therapy to Social Change

CW: Suicide, trauma, abandonment, sexual abuse, alcoholism, rape, slavery, self-harm, homophobia.

What happens when privilege, trauma, and leadership intersect within the walls of a boarding school? We invite you to join our compelling conversation with Tom Greaves, Piers Cross, and Jonny Lovett, as they unravel their personal journeys through the labyrinthine world of boarding education. This episode challenges the notion of resilience, questioning whether the experiences of isolation, bullying, and the emotional voids left by early separation can be classified as trauma. We explore the ways these experiences shape leaders, with figures like Boris Johnson and Donald Trump as potential case studies shaped by their past.
The emotional landscape of boarding school life is vast and complex, leaving indelible marks on personal relationships and emotional development. Our guests recount stories of betrayal, isolation, and the struggle to express emotions while reconciling privilege with vulnerability. These narratives illuminate a cycle of trauma that transcends generations, with familial bonds often strained by the experiences of being sent away. As we discuss the broader societal implications, we examine how ingrained behaviors from such privileged backgrounds can hinder authenticity and connection in adulthood.
Throughout our discussion, we address the psychological impacts of boarding school, including the strategic survival personalities cultivated within these institutions. The conversation delves into class disdain and the societal disconnects perpetuated by such education systems. With anecdotes from public figures like Richard Branson and Bear Grylls, we shed light on the long-lasting effects of these formative years. As our guests share their paths to healing, we emphasize the importance of addressing these deeply rooted issues for both personal and societal transformation, highlighting ongoing projects aimed at fostering understanding and change.

One of our panelists touches on themes of homophobia. Whilst this was not explicitly explored or condemned, the TaSC network and all those involved in the podcast do not support homophobic views or beliefs of any kind.

You can find out more about our chair and panelists here:

Connect with Ester on LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/in/ester-wheeler-458a55167?originalSubdomain=uk

Jonny's private practice website: https://springtidescotland.com/

The trailer for Piers’ upcoming documentary: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=stMvUcsZzlM

Follow Tom to keep up to date with his upcoming show about male friendships: https://www.instagram.com/tdrgreaves/?hl=en

Resources mentioned in the episode (books unless otherwise stated):

Judith Herman, Trauma and Recovery

Nick Duffell, The Making of Them & Boarding School Survivor Workshops

Suzanne Zeedyk, The Connected Baby - 2011 Documentary

Richard beard, Sad Little Men

If… – 1968 Film

Jennifer Freyd, Betrayal Trauma: Logic of Forgetting Childhood Abuse: The Logic of Forgetting Childhood Abuse

Joy Schaverien, Boarding school: the trauma of the ‘privileged’ child

Richard Branson, Losing My Virginity

Bear Grylls, Mud, Sweat and Tears

John Peel, Margrave of the Marshes

David Niven, The Moon’s A Balloon

Mad, Bad and Dangerous to Know

Ranulph Fiennes, Mad, Bad and Dangerous to Know

Fight Club – 1999 Film

David Cameron, For the Record
This Podcast is sponsored by Onlinevents

Chapters

1. Exploring boarding school trauma and its impact on leadership and society (00:00:00)

2. Exploring Boarding School Trauma and Influence (00:00:01)

3. Impact of Boarding School Trauma (00:10:31)

4. Boarding School Trauma and Isolation (00:20:21)

5. Exploring Boarding School Trauma and Healing (00:27:17)

6. Exploring Masculinity in Boarding Schools (00:36:27)

7. Impact of Boarding School Behavior (00:42:59)

8. Understanding Betrayal Trauma in Boarding Schools (00:53:54)

9. Boarding School Trauma and Leadership (00:58:53)

10. Class Disdain in Boarding Schools (01:09:34)

11. Exploring Class, Trauma, and Privilege (01:25:52)