Late Summer Pep Talk

Become A Calm Mama

Moms often start the summer feeling energized, encouraged and ready to go! Then around week 6 or 7, the kids are fighting, they never seem happy and everything sucks. This is your late summer pep talk to help you get out of that funk and get through the rest of summer.

If you're having a great summer, I love that for you. But if you're struggling, if you're burned out, resentful or overwhelmed, if you're feeling like your kids are out of control, then this is your episode.

You’ll Learn:

• Why this late summer with kids feels so tough (it’s totally normal!)
• How to get what you want out of the rest of the summer
• What to do when your kid’s behavior has gotten out of control
• How to fit mini breaks into your busy day

I’m giving you 3 strategies to help you reset your body, mind and limits. If you’re feeling crappy about how things are going, your kid is pushing boundaries or you’re just plain exhausted, these are for you.

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Believe me when I tell you that you are not the only one feeling this way. We’re in the doldrums of summer, where the initial excitement has worn off but it’s not back-to-school time just yet.

Whatever You’ve Done Is Enough

It’s easy to look around and think that other families have it easier, other moms seem happier and other kids are having more fun.

But whatever you’ve done is enough.

Whether your kids are home or at camp, no matter what they’re doing, they’re probably going to look back on their summer as being pretty great. Because they’re not at school.

Summer is magical for children. There’s fun and late nights and ice cream and maybe a vacation. You don’t have to create some unicorn magical experience for your kid in order to create a good feeling for them.

So whatever you've done or whatever you've planned, I want you to sink into the fact that it's enough. Your kids are having a great summer because it's summer. That is enough.

Late Summer Strategies

That being said, there’s some summer left to go, and you might need a little boost to help you through it.

This time of the summer can be a great time for a reset. I’m sharing 3 different strategies you can try.

Option #1: Mindset Reset

This reset will help you figure out what you want out of the rest of the summer and make it happen.

I often talk about chasing feelings, and this is exactly that. How do you want the rest of your summer to feel? How do you want to feel while it’s happening?

Personally I have been feeling a bit discouraged, sad and disappointed lately, thinking things like, “This summer was wasted,” and “I didn’t plan well. I didn’t do it right.” So I’m working to shift to a more positive mindset.

For the rest of my summer, I’m chasing connection. I want to feel really close to my kids. I’m practicing thoughts like, “I can make family time happen,” “My kids love hanging out with us,” “My kids want to be part of a family,” and “Connection happens in simple ways.”

From these thoughts, I’ll decide on some actions I want to take to feel that connection. Then, I’ll ask my kids if they’d be interested in or willing to do those things. If not, we’ll brainstorm together and come up with some new ideas.

Choose the feeling you want to chase, come up with some thoughts that will help you feel that way and make a list of actions that will help you get the thing you want for the rest of the summer.

Option #2: Limit Reset

If your kids seem super dysregulated or you’re seeing a lot of sibling squabbles or out-of-bounds behavior, it might be time for a Limit Reset.

A big thing that happens during the summer is that we go outside of our boundaries and get loosey goosey on limits around bedtime, sugar or screens. It’s fun in the summer to let some of the structure go and be a bit more free.

But healthy diets, good sleep habits and limited screen time help our kids’ nervous systems stay regulated (and they behave better). If you feel like things have gotten out of balance, take a beat and reset to your typical family rhythms.

Build the normal rules you have during the school year back into your day. Take a day or a few days to get back into that old routine.

A thought that might help with this (especially if things don’t go quite as planned) is, “I can always get back to our rhythms and limits.”

You can also think of this as a “breathe in” day. We’re out and about a lot in the summer. When there’s a lot going on, it’s a lot of stimulation and can be hard on kids’ nervous systems.

During a “breathe in” day, you just chill and recharge. Do quiet activities, relax at home, bake some cookies or make popsicles. Settle everyone down and let their nervous systems get back to a baseline.

Option #3: Reset Your Body

This one is about managing your own burnout. If your body is crying out for a break, you need to take one. You get to take breaks.

Ideally, you can get at least a couple of hours to rest. Swap childcare with a friend, take an afternoon off from work while your kids are at camp, do what you need to do to get yourself a break.

I also love to take mini breaks. A mini break can be as simple as pouring yourself a glass of iced tea and sitting somewhere comfortable or beautiful. Sit, observe and drink your tea. Even a 5-10 minute break like this can be so powerful.

Let your nervous system settle, connect with your body, breathe slowly and let the racing mind settle down. Slow down, be present and pay attention.

You might be thinking that this isn’t possible for you because your kids are always around. You can teach your kids about your mini breaks and invite them to practice with you. Say something like, “Mommy’s doing her mini break. I’m going to sit here for 5 minutes. You’re welcome to get your own drink and sit near me as long as you’re quiet.”

Some other ideas for mini breaks:

• Put on your headphones and listen to music or a podcast while you cook dinner
• Take a walk alone after your partner gets home
• Do a yoga class on YouTube
• Take a night off the bedtime routine and read a book

If you have a partner, ask for help with this. If not, reach out to friends, family or a babysitter.

I want for you to finish this summer feeling empowered, confident, content and hopeful. To look back at the end of it and think to yourself, “Good job, Mama. We did it.”

So give yourself a pat on the back for making it this far. Then, take a moment to figure out what you need. Whether it’s more limits and rhythms, mindset and an action plan or a break (or all three), go get it for yourself. Take care of yourself, Mama. You’ve got this!

Mentioned in this episode:

• The Mama Attorney on Instagram
• Episode 19: Stress-Free Summer Mindset
• Episode 21: Avoid Summer Burnout
• Episode 76: Summer Reset
• Get my free Summer Toolkit

Free Resources:

Get your copy of the Stop Yelling Cheat Sheet!

In this free guide you’ll discover:

✨ A simple tool to stop yelling once you’ve started (This one thing will get you calm.)

✨ 40 things to do instead of yelling. (You only need to pick one!)

✨ Exactly why you yell. (And how to stop yourself from starting.)

✨A script to say to your kids when you yell. (So they don't follow you around!)

Download the Stop Yelling Cheat Sheet here

Connect With Darlynn:

• Book a complimentary session with Darlynn
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