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N4L 144: "The Good Fight" by Liane Davey

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Manage episode 264657731 series 1556353
Content provided by Janet Perry, Janet Perry: podcaster, and Nonfiction book lover. All podcast content including episodes, graphics, and podcast descriptions are uploaded and provided directly by Janet Perry, Janet Perry: podcaster, and Nonfiction book lover or their podcast platform partner. If you believe someone is using your copyrighted work without your permission, you can follow the process outlined here https://player.fm/legal.

SUMMARY

In her newest book, The Good Fight: Use Productive Conflict to Get Your Team and Your Organization Back on Track, Liane Davey explodes the myth that “conflict” is a bad word or something to be avoided. She boldly claims, "Organizations require conflict." Without it, stagnation and resentment settle into the cracks of an original issue, making it hard to move forward. Even though conflict aversion seems to be baked into how we’re socialized, we can learn strategies for “fighting” in a productive, healthy way.

KEY POINTS

  • Instead of "the good fight," conflict is translated into passive aggression.
  • Societal messages teach us we should avoid conflict: “Mind your own business. Don’t upset her. Stay out of trouble. Bullying is bad. If you can’t say something nice, don’t say anything at all.”
  • Conflict tends to be the least costly way of working through issues.
  • Conflict debt: the sum of all the contentious issues that need to be addressed to be able to move forward but instead remain undiscussed and unresolved
  • A wide predictor of the success of teams is how many women are on the team.
  • Three-step strategy for managing conflict: validate; ask question(s); pivot

QUOTES FROM DAVEY

  • “At its essence, conflict is just the struggle between opposing wants, needs, and demands.”
  • “Conflict isn't bad for organizations; it's fundamental to them."
  • “Don’t measure the health of your relationship based on whether you have conflict or not. Instead, pay attention to the quality of the conflict.”
  • “The longer you leave the original problem unresolved, the more interest you pay.”

BUY The Good Fight: Use Productive Conflict to Get Your Team and Organization Back on Track

RECOMMENDATION

Find “new approaches for resolving conflicts, creating new common ground, and achieving greater levels of intimacy” in Dr. John Gottman’s New York Times bestseller.

BUY The Seven Principles for Making Marriage Work: A Practical Guide from the Country's Foremost Relationship Expert

For weekly updates, join our email list.

Connect with us!

Special thanks…

  continue reading

114 episodes

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N4L 144: "The Good Fight" by Liane Davey

Nonfiction4Life

23 subscribers

published

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Archived series ("Inactive feed" status)

When? This feed was archived on October 02, 2021 03:09 (3y ago). Last successful fetch was on September 01, 2021 08:40 (3y ago)

Why? Inactive feed status. Our servers were unable to retrieve a valid podcast feed for a sustained period.

What now? You might be able to find a more up-to-date version using the search function. This series will no longer be checked for updates. If you believe this to be in error, please check if the publisher's feed link below is valid and contact support to request the feed be restored or if you have any other concerns about this.

Manage episode 264657731 series 1556353
Content provided by Janet Perry, Janet Perry: podcaster, and Nonfiction book lover. All podcast content including episodes, graphics, and podcast descriptions are uploaded and provided directly by Janet Perry, Janet Perry: podcaster, and Nonfiction book lover or their podcast platform partner. If you believe someone is using your copyrighted work without your permission, you can follow the process outlined here https://player.fm/legal.

SUMMARY

In her newest book, The Good Fight: Use Productive Conflict to Get Your Team and Your Organization Back on Track, Liane Davey explodes the myth that “conflict” is a bad word or something to be avoided. She boldly claims, "Organizations require conflict." Without it, stagnation and resentment settle into the cracks of an original issue, making it hard to move forward. Even though conflict aversion seems to be baked into how we’re socialized, we can learn strategies for “fighting” in a productive, healthy way.

KEY POINTS

  • Instead of "the good fight," conflict is translated into passive aggression.
  • Societal messages teach us we should avoid conflict: “Mind your own business. Don’t upset her. Stay out of trouble. Bullying is bad. If you can’t say something nice, don’t say anything at all.”
  • Conflict tends to be the least costly way of working through issues.
  • Conflict debt: the sum of all the contentious issues that need to be addressed to be able to move forward but instead remain undiscussed and unresolved
  • A wide predictor of the success of teams is how many women are on the team.
  • Three-step strategy for managing conflict: validate; ask question(s); pivot

QUOTES FROM DAVEY

  • “At its essence, conflict is just the struggle between opposing wants, needs, and demands.”
  • “Conflict isn't bad for organizations; it's fundamental to them."
  • “Don’t measure the health of your relationship based on whether you have conflict or not. Instead, pay attention to the quality of the conflict.”
  • “The longer you leave the original problem unresolved, the more interest you pay.”

BUY The Good Fight: Use Productive Conflict to Get Your Team and Organization Back on Track

RECOMMENDATION

Find “new approaches for resolving conflicts, creating new common ground, and achieving greater levels of intimacy” in Dr. John Gottman’s New York Times bestseller.

BUY The Seven Principles for Making Marriage Work: A Practical Guide from the Country's Foremost Relationship Expert

For weekly updates, join our email list.

Connect with us!

Special thanks…

  continue reading

114 episodes

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