S2:E6 // Break Up With Perfectionism

Self-Aware Millennial

You know you're a performative perfectionist when:

• you beat yourself up for things that couldn't possibly be your fault
• you go out of your way to make people who have hurt you more comfortable
• you take every piece of feedback personally as an attack on your character
• saying "no" feels like the worst thing that could possibly happen
• you get defensive for making totally normal mistakes

Perfectionism is so damaging, not only because it creates an impossible standard to live up to but because it traps you in behaviors and thought patterns that convince you that you'll never be good enough.


The most damaging elements of living to perform and please and perfect are the need to get validation from others and the negative self-talk that comes with inevitable failures. By choosing to live in a perfectionist construct instead of an authentic one, you're setting yourself up to feel like shit and never win. No matter how hard you try.

As a recovering perfection performer, I can tell you things are so much better on this side of things. Life feels and smells wonderful when mistakes are okay. When the weight of the world isn't crushing your shoulders. When you let others be responsible for their own behavior and consequences.

Join me in breaking up with perfectionism.

By building self-awareness of when and how your perfectionism manifests, you can begin to put things in perspective and step away from the self-hate. Instead, you can explore and experiment and learn new and exciting ways to show up even stronger!

Best of all, you'll create space to get your joy on!

Listen to this episode for examples of how performative perfectionism shows up in my life and how my Should-But Cleanse method can help you create positive changes.