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The Talegate Podcast

Harrison the Florida Man & Aaron the Cheesehead

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Join the Talegaters, Cheesehead and Florida Man, as they embark on a roadtrip across America to uncover the mysteries behind tall tales, fairy tales, folktales, fishtales, & urban legends, one interview at a time!
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Join this genuine odd couple Dave and Paul in their living room, and listen in as they laugh, gab and sass (and sometimes argue) their way through all sorts of topics ranging from Pop Culture, True Crime, Headline News, LGBTQ+ Issues, Spooky Horrifying Crazy Wacky Ridiculous Stories, Trivia Nights, and so much more! When you mix the Disturbing in David and the Pragmatic in Paul you get Disturbingly Pragmatic, a podcast that will make you laugh, think, and ask yourself "WTF? Am I living in an ...
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This Episode has EVERYTHING! It's got: Paul's irritation! Irritating tics! Leonard! Dave might just be a bit irritating...! Little brother, Dave! White person taco night! Pico de Gallo! Boring recipes! Paul's delicious salad dressing! "Hi! My name's Steve, and I'm a convicted sex offender!" Bring that sass! Don't eat Boar's Head Meat products! Paul…
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This Episode has EVERYTHING! It's got: Why is Dave doing what he's doing? To annoy you! Is it working? Paul is very demure and mindful! Dave got French right! Sassy Paul is out to play! Jools Lebron! Look them up! Paul's sudden love of...feta?! Greek salad deliciousness! Glazed donuts! Paul ate ALL the feta! If you're offended easily, please don't …
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This Episode has EVERYTHING! It's got: Episode 69 with someone planking on top! Saturday recordings! Dave is a little old man! LCBO on Strike! Doug Ford, brother of Crackhead Rob Ford! Dangerous edibles! Dave enjoys being high! The Great Mysterio! Dave has no point! Medicine time! Death denying society! Yay! Rick Mercer's ice flows! "The Office" is…
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This Episode has EVERYTHING! It's got: Harrison Butker wants his wife in the kitchen making cookies! The Rule of Thumb was a thing! It's 2024, for goodness’ sake! Trad Wife movement is ridiculous! Right wing homosexuality! Stop thrusting your religious nonsense on me! Happy Birthday, CIA Amy! Happy 52nd birthday, Dave! Nummy Steak! Paul is an extro…
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This Episode has EVERYTHING! It's got: Laughter! Intros are fun! Amy Sedaris night! More WINE! Bye bye, OJ! Dave has a bunch of useless crap in his mind! We experienced solar eclipse totality! Bloody clouds! Car sickness! Day to night, back to day in minutes! Sharp shadows! The rapture will get rid of a lot of a-holes! Paul's phantom conversations!…
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This Episode has EVERYTHING! It's got: It's WINE o'clock! French butcher! Gewürztraminer wine! David is a cheap drunk, apparently! Paul is a fantastic chef! Soy sauce problems! We enjoyed "Ghostbusters: Frozen Empire"! Truman Capote was annoying! Smoking is gross! Vaping is ridiculous! Solar Eclipse of the heart! Totality is where it's at, baby! Al…
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This Episode has EVERYTHING! It's got: Gross songs! Thanks, Tim! Yeast is still gross! Paula Abdul! Paul's songs and music ADHD! Yes, and?! Madonna is a jackass to her fans! We love sleeping! More BLTs! Dave??!! We miss John Candy! Paul isn't sentimental! Let's get rid of Dave's stuff before he dies! Dave is Paul's daddy! Pornhub pulls out of Texas…
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This Episode has EVERYTHING! It's got: The BEE GEES! Dave is a lady boy man! We're a day late, but yer getting an episode! Paul is the animal nanny! Olive the dog! Dave, the BLT master! No basic sandwiches for Dave! Paul is a basic sandwich bitch! Trailer park memories! Head Cheese sounds DELICIOUS! Happy Early 20th Anniversary, Doug and Chris! Hav…
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This Episode has EVERYTHING! It's got: Paul's congestion! It's Amy Sedaris night! Low energy Friday! Hey Julieta, Diana, and Brit! Paul is empathetic! Dave...not so much! Dave was molested? WHAAAATTT??!?!?! "Saltburn" was not shocking to us! Uncut grave humping! "Short Bus" was shocking! Paul at Pine Knob! "Curb Your Enthusiasm" is uncomfortable! W…
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This Episode has EVERYTHING! It's got: A Spanish flea! Happy 2024! Paul got COVID! Our fun health issues! YAY! We're boiling, globally speaking! SAD = Great acronym! Paul's TV show dreams! "Curb Your Enthusiasm" is cringe - but in a good way! "Young Sheldon" isn't Dave's fave...! Dave = Ruiner of Paul's enjoyment of shows! Blame it on the edit! Let…
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This Episode has EVERYTHING! It's got: Ron the Gay Nosed Reindeer! I'm a power, dom top! Brutalized French, yet again! Ghouliani is SCREWED! YAYYYYY! Abuse of power finally slapped down! Andrew Giuliani is a huge POS, just like his dad! Rudy Ghouliani married his second cousin! Dave pukes loudly! Paul pukes quietly! Petechial hemorrhage = MURDER! L…
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This Episode has EVERYTHING! It's got: Bing Crosby was a Christmas monster! Chevy Chase is a complete dirtbag! Schwetty Jingle Balls! Terry Bitchy! "Candy Cane Lane" is the shepherd's pie of movies! Dave isn't into the Marvel Universe...or "Star Wars"...! Dave's core 4: "Die Hard", "Home Alone", "Christmas Vacation", and "A Christmas Story"! Leonar…
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This Episode has EVERYTHING! It's got: Bad Beyoncé! Low energy! Hey Macao! Give us a dingle! Name change to "It's been a Hot Minute!"! Welcome to our newest Patreon member, KEVIN! Hey Kevin! Let's all pee inappropriately on the plane! Full moons! Haaaaay Herbie! Leonard, the attention whore! Happy Anniversary, "Wicked, the Musical"! Our fun musical…
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This Episode has EVERYTHING! It's got: Creamy goodness! More attempted French! Ronnie Vino says hello! More poopy plane fun! Debagging??!! Steamy bathroom floor poo! Accident or on purpose? YOU DECIDE! Human garbage! STEWARDESS??!! Wow...way to show your age, Dave! Kevin's flight attendant memories! Leonard! Paul's bitchiness! Throat punch with the…
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This Episode has EVERYTHING! It's got: Sausages and dryers! October Friday the 13th, baby! Trumped solar eclipses! Dave is a hot dog aficionado! Paul enjoys mouth feel! Alcoholics! Lips and Assholes, Beaks and Feet! Karen! Ass cancer! Diarrhea plane, part deux! Crime scene sex doll fun! Dave's sex doll fun! Avenue Q! Stupid baby names! SO STUPID! I…
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This Episode has EVERYTHING! It's got: Diarrhea, plop plop! When in doubt, reboot! David's issues! AGAIN! Welcome to our new Patreon member, Abigail! Depression is fantastic! Hot sex in the masturbatorium! Burps AND farts! Pumpkin spice latte! Taylor Swift enjoys some Kelce penis! Paris bed bug fun! Cole slaw cum! Greek salad! Mozzarella stick math…
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This Episode has EVERYTHING! It's got: Dusty Rose, Crystal Chandelier, and Mavis Ferryweather! Butchered French! We love Amy Sedaris! 1-900-Wank-Me! 250,000 or bust! RIP Johnny Hardwick! Falling snakes! AND Hawks! F You in Particular, Peggy Jones! "Birdemic Shock and Terror" is fabulous! Panties! Ghost divorce! Home wrecking from beyond the grave w…
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This Episode has EVERYTHING! It's got: RIP Sinéad O'Connor! Madonna...girl! "Barbie"! AT THE DRIVE IN!!! Discomfort at the drive in! Paul's crankiness! Delicious snacks! Paul's "Barbie" score: B-! Dave's "Barbie" score: F! Paul hates historical dramas; Dave loves them! Paul's birthday is around the corner! Charcuterie goodness! Paul's garlic dip is…
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This Episode has EVERYTHING! It's got: Colleen Ballinger is a weirdo! Dave loves cringe; Paul does not! "American Idol" cringe! Creepy people aren't always men! Leonard! Jonah Hill is an ass! Aboot! Civil War veteran teachers! Time blindness??!! Late to a plane?!?! NEVER!!! The Nanny union boss! In perpetuity! Shrinkflation! What fun! Paul's delici…
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This Episode has EVERYTHING! It's got: Paul and Dave on each other's tits! Wham! The movies are an expensive outing! We enjoyed "Indiana Jones and the Dial of Destiny"! Nazis are the best villains! Paul loves Kelly Clarkson! "Chemistry" tells a story! From weed to cocaine! Lots of likes! Let's play the skin flute! We're stupid bitches! Ontario's ed…
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This Episode has EVERYTHING! It's got: The jazz styling of Dave and Paul! Movement disorders are fun! Dave 2-minute update! Meta Paul! Paul 2-minute update! Work sucks! Caulk! Dave's a handyman! 80s Aerobics! The world's on fire! Hey! Let's go visit the Titanic! Stockton Rush is a dipshit! We need toilets! Plural! Can you identify this bucket of yo…
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This Episode has EVERYTHING! It's got: Dancing hamsters! Grandpappy issues! Happy 51st Birthday, Dave! Expensive Mentos! The United States snack attacks! Plastic bottles suuuucccccckkkkkk! Sand! Getting smokes for yer mom! Coke! Happy Belated Birthday, CIA Amy! Chris Pratt's nasty toenail! Toe sucking alarm clock! Leonard! Nude man alarm clock! Org…
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This Episode has EVERYTHING! It's got: Mermaids don't have feet! Gay singing! More sickness! Dave loves to move it, move it! Dangerous straws! Sanka?! Delicious?!?! Death has a sense of humour! It's Rube Goldberg, stupid! Death in "Final Destination" is a real bitch! Testicular cancer isn't funny, you dumbass! Stupid children names! Abcde Lmnop! Pa…
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This Episode has EVERYTHING! It's got: The Brady Bunch! Paul's stress! Long roads, winding turns! Paul! David! Paul! David! Paul! David! Paul! "The Wizard of Oz"! Munchkin Orgies! The album is Pink Floyd's "Dark Side of the Moon"! Paul's throat noises! Thank GOD for air conditioning! Leonard! The incident! Angry typing! Paul's frustration can be hi…
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This Episode has EVERYTHING! It's got: Happy Jesus day! Heavy-duty reenactments! Zombie Jesus! The light at the end of the tunnel! Déjà vu! Leonard! Donkey kicks and punches! Lifes vs Lives! AI is already destroying humanity! We deserve it! Siloed echo chambers of stupidity! 50K Km closer to the SUN! Not the Earth! Stupid Dave! Dave drinks! Kick-st…
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This Episode has EVERYTHING! It's got: Paul the song hopper! Music ADHD isn't fun! Super gay! Transparent, not translucent! Sneeze poops! LILLY and LEONARD! Vagisil! Ya put it on your pussy! Dave's mom's hysterectomy! Reddit masturbation! The internet is for porn! Dave's Cabbage Patch Doll: Kendrick Rafael! Dave was a very gay child! Shaving Dave! …
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This Episode has EVERYTHING! It's got: Three of our Patreon Exclusive aftershows! Episode 72 Aftershow: Reading Rainbow! More Creepy Stories! Ginger Gs! Ghostly Clothes Folding! Wear Your Helmet! Cabin In The Woods! Creepy Old Dead Lady! Creepy Phone Calls! It's Coming From Inside The House! Dave Needs Lots of Vitamin D! WINK! Low Energy Dave! Yawn…
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This Episode has EVERYTHING! It's got: Jars of rainbows! Age differences can be fun! Foot taps = sexy bathroom encounters! Amy Sedaris night! Dave was a funeral director! (WHAT??!!) Leonard's lack of poop! (UPDATE: He pooped on Saturday morning!!) Dave knows nothing about cash apps! Generational Karens! "Pump Up the Volume" kicks ass! Weird ice cre…
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This Episode has EVERYTHING! It's got: Jazz hands, low energy Tuesday! Ghost pepper sauce is delish! K-Pop! Travis Kelce triggers our thirst! Irish Spring soap! 80s vs 90s childhoods - YOU decide! Subway tuna is still delicious! The Australian porn star "penis starfish"! "Schmigadoon!" season 2 - "Schmicago!" Amputation disasters! Penile workaround…
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This Episode has EVERYTHING! It's got: The late Valentine's Day song for Paul from Dave! Sixty-Nine-ing! Unknown ABBA lyrics! Typing classes! Suddenly Seymour! Coconut cream pie in a can! Screw diabetes! Dave chooses pie over his foot! Cool Whip is delicious! Leonard LOVES whipped cream! Lilly LOVES candy canes! Hadrian's Wall is in Britain! Ad blo…
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This Episode has EVERYTHING! It's got: Rihanna! Sports! Paul's drinking! Poor Meghan is overwhelmed and upset! "South Park" is hilarious! Pragmatic Paul! Meghan isn't very sincere! Kylie Jenner farted today! Leonard farted, too! Dave hates weddings, unless there is a show! Wedding horror! So many questions! Flapjacks! Mammary milk mouth! Screw Netf…
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This Episode has EVERYTHING! It's got: Ohio trains! Another special episode! Fives aren't even, dumbass! MEGA! The aughts! Paul loved "M3GAN"; Dave, not so much! Big nope for a "Westworld" trip! What ever happened to the white dog poo from the 70s?! Barefoot poop fun! Rolling around in dog poop! Craigslist hook ups! Jacuzzi ass molecules! Nuke fun!…
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This Episode has EVERYTHING! It's got: RIP Burt Bacharach! Settling graves! Happy Valentine's Day! Happy colon removal day! Dave's mouth noises! "For the Love of DILFs"! Tony Cannoli! Paul Hollywood! More of Dave's noises! Valentine's Day cockroaches! Paul's aggression! VHRS! Dave is on "Risk! True Tales Boldly Told" podcast! Thanks Taj Easton! Ine…
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This Episode has EVERYTHING! It's got: American Pie! Belly button lint! Amy Sedaris night on the podcast! Dave's fan girl moments! No cold calling! Pasta salad and herbs! OMFG! A POTENTIAL MURDOCH MYSTERIES SET VISIT! Hard Pecker cheese! Drew Toynbee's amazing new trailer for us! His name is DREW, NOT WILL! We can't wait for Picard Season 3! 4K Vid…
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This Episode has EVERYTHING! It's got: Master and servant! Dave's mesh belly shirt! Boot camp! "The Jerry Springer Show"! Trash TV shows! More NASA bad luck! "For All Mankind" is still incredible! To avoid any "The Last of Us" spoilers, please go to the following time: 13:03! Dave's emotions! Holly Marie Combs is awesome! Fred and Ethel Mertz hated…
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This Episode has EVERYTHING! It's got: Friday surprises! Blowing loads in one shot! Paul hates the Aughts! Paul's accents! Mead! Paul's grooming! Paul loves his weeds! Palm leaves! Table inserts! Awful NASA anniversaries! Text message fun! 4D Cinema fun! Feel around! Paul is doobietastic! Justin Roiland is a huge bag of douche! Extra tartar sauce! …
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This Episode has EVERYTHING! It's got: Homosexual singing birds! It's been a hot minute! January sucks! Peanut butter jelly time! Leonard's poops! Heathers! Vets cost money! Fashion show hunger games! Our take on "The Last of Us"! Scary prologues! We also love "For All Mankind"! Flat earth stupidity! This fucking guy! Leonard! Beef stew! Deteriorat…
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This Episode has EVERYTHING! It's got: Paul's singing! "King of the Hill" doobie sessions! Age differences! Book store vibrators! Orgasm discounts! Rejected Ontario licence plates! Dave's bum eye! We love "Drop Dead Gorgeous"! "Wednesday" tattoo fail! Tit tattoos! Gay Noah Schnapp! Dead body parts! Necrophilia ain't sexy! "South Park" unintentional…
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This Episode has EVERYTHING! It's got: HAPPY NEW YEAR! Pooping your pants! More French numbers! Blizzards! Excess packaging! Side effects! It's actually "Hendrick's Gin"! Daddy! Charcuterie! "Violent Night" was fantastic! We also loved "Knives Out", and "Glass Onion: A Knives Out Mystery"! "Welcome to Chippendales" was also amazing! Paul not impres…
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Tonight, we have a very special crossover episode with our friends Caitlyn and Cassie from PNW Haunts & Homicides! Join Caitlyn and Cassie as they chat about true crime, the paranormal, and all kinds of spooky shit in the Pacific Northwest. Just two "normal-ish" friends who wanted more local, creepy stories, so they never sleep or leave their house…
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This Episode has EVERYTHING! It's got: Silent Night! Amy Sedaris night! Lilly and Leonard! Disney mascots! Leonard! Pudding poops! Feline irritable bowel syndrome! Mississauga Animal Hospital! Paul's power moves! Dumpy Trump digital trading cards! Money laundering! Terry's Chocolate Oranges! Paul's pronunciations! Peppermint candy canes! Nay to spe…
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Tonight, we host our very special guest: Stephen Tobolowsky! Stephen Tobolowsky is one of the leading character actors today. He has appeared in over 200 movies and television shows. He has played everything from Ned Ryerson in Groundhog Day to Sandy Ryerson in Glee. He has appeared almost naked as Stu Beggs on Californication and has worn the same…
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This Episode has EVERYTHING! It's got: Decemberfest! Low energy Friday night! Bisexual VAX received! 5G microchips in our heads! Yay! We love "Welcome to Chippendales"! We don't know, Margo! One episode a week? WTF?! Fargo! Dr. Biff Jackson! Celine married her grandfather! Elderly Florida man swindled by his child bride! Why people get colds in col…
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This Episode has EVERYTHING! It's got: IT'S CHRISTMAS! Bong Crisby! No spirit here! So, Christmas! Pilk sounds disgusting! No dairy in my pop, please! Dave's Malt Shop days! Ambrosia salad! "A Christmas Story Christmas"! To avoid "A Christmas Story Christmas" spoilers, skip to the following time: 26:16 Bunny suits and Dave's crush on Peter Billings…
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This Episode has EVERYTHING! It's got: ABBA! Wrong lyrics! Lilly and Leonard! Cacophony of malaise! Choices have consequences! LEONARD! Paul loves "The Great British Bake Off"! Dave loves cake! What's a Gluten?! "Disenchanted" was...um...OK...! Paul's "A" in math! No "The Goonies" Sequel! No "The Goonies" Remake! "Disenchanted" = "Coming to America…
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This Episode has EVERYTHING! It's got: Happy Black Friday! Paul's back pimple! Lots of contact lenses! Paul loves pimple popping! Dave does not! "Chucky" Season 2 was wild! Happy belated Thanksgiving, our American friends! "The Goonies" House up for sale! Potatoes with a side of white supremacy! Dave hates weddings! Groom shows up in casket! What a…
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Tonight, we host our very special guest: John Billingsley! John Billingsley has been a prolific character actor working across stage and screen for over three decades. In film, he is perhaps best known for his Lead role in OUT OF TIME (starring opposite Denzell Washington), and in television his breakout role came as a Series Regular in STAR TREK: …
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This Episode has EVERYTHING! It's got: It's been a while! Dave bombs...and melts! Leonard! Dave's disorder is a cheap date! Paul loves insanity! So, it's not a real baby?! Paul's genuine concern! The devil's lettuce! Local youth! Emotional support bear, Loving Bear Puffy! Australian dollars! Yiffing could be a lot of fun! Professional cuddling! Dav…
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This Episode has EVERYTHING! It's got: Paul thinks "The Wreck of the Edmund Fitzgerald" might be racist! Paul isn't really a Canadian, apparently! River Dancing! Yes, Paul...Gordon Lightfoot is still alive! Canadian accents! Paul STILL hates "Human Centipede"! Cats cost a LOT of money! Paul's whiplash! "Alo Glo" is from "Cabinet of Curiosities"! Li…
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This Episode has EVERYTHING! It's got: Sassy Beginnings! Loud Explosive Farts and Liquid Hot Magma! No Rings of Fire! Maude Flanders' Unflavoured Sitz Baths! Bea Arthur! Dave isn't Anti-Woke btw! He's Just an Asshole! Give People a Proper Raise! Death Taxes! Illegal Strikes! Drug Dealing Politicians! Solidarity Strikes! France Gets Angry! Agricultu…
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