Audio quality warning: For some reason, this one's pretty bad. On this dig back into past Patreon episodes, Doug pitches a great movie title, Jamie doesn't quite understand how our lead could possibly have a music career, and we both have such a difficult time readying all the hand-written messages in this made-for-tv movie. Be very afraid of your …

On the latest episode of the podcast, Doug suggests fixing this movie simply by removing the entire plot, Jamie confuses Tom Arnold with Tom Collins, Arnold Palmer and the name of a hotel, and we are both wildly distracted by the giant lump on the side of Kevin Spacey's face throughout the film. Smear a bunch of yogurt on your face while showering,…

On this dig back into past Patreon episodes, Jamie kinda wants more screen time with Arnold in nothing but a black speedo, Doug is a bit confused by who exactly the main villain of the piece is, and we fall involve with the absolutely adorable montage to open the film. Best padlock your toolshed, steal the tiniest car you can find, and join us as w…

On the latest episode of the podcast, Doug can't wait till his wife leaves him and he can finally purchase a windmill house in the Hamptons, Jamie doesn't understand why anyone would go on Merv Griffin with Phil Donahue around, and we both wonder what it would be like if the film were updated with Mark Wahlberg in the role of the psychic. Purchase …

On this dig back into past Patreon episodes, Jamie realizes that Chewbacca's pretty much a dead-beat-dad, Doug admits that while he never wanted to know what the Wookie pornography delivery system is, he's glad he does now, and we adore the relationship between Chewie's wife and Ralph Kamden's best friend. Toss a storm trooper to his horrible death…

On the latest episode of the podcast, Doug wonders if Wendy's fries would cause an angel severe diarrhea, Jamie inadvertently stumbles into a porthole/portal to porn bit, and we both agree that Phoebe Cates and the man who plays her father may be the only reasons to take a look at this film. Bury that French accent in dolphin noises, chow down on a…

On this dig back into past Patreon episodes, Jamie lets it slip that she worked at Blockbuster (which is news to her cohost), Doug has a big issue with the wardrobe choices throughout, and we both are a bit creeped out by these dead-eyed red-headed twins. Lead your family sing along of Yackety Yak, get that bear some pants to cover his bare ass, an…

On the latest episode of the podcast, Doug obsesses with a character's extreme amount of body hair, Jamie begins to question everything she knows regarding golf-attire, and we both fall into a giggle fit when recounting a certain line delivered in this film. Crank up the volume on your 'work' boom box, dump that V8 all over your chest, and join us …

On this dig back into past Patreon episodes, we travel back to 2017 to an early subscriber-only episode. Jamie assumes Michelle Pfeiffer was still trying to figure this 'acting thing' out, Doug likes Robert Wuhl as much as the next guy but argues that he cannot carry any film, and we both are a bit confused by the adoration of 50s culture in the 19…

On the latest episode of the podcast, Doug realizes that he scheduled his colonoscopy on his 20th wedding anniversary (we wish this was a joke), Jamie recounts the time she told an Army recruiter that she couldn't serve due to being a 'delicate flower', and we embarrass ourselves when trying to discuss anything military-related. Change your hair co…

On this dig back into past Patreon episodes, we travel back to 2017 to our very first subscriber-only episode. Jamie is disgusted (appropriately) through the recording, Doug does some research on the actual age of the actress which makes this much worse, and we both are pretty sad this this is the first film we're covering with this wonderful cast.…

On the latest episode of the podcast, Doug sings the praises of the majority of the cast in this horrible movie, Jamie thinks she's watching a movie starring Connie Francis and Perry Mason, and we both marvel at the decision to allow Dan Akyroyd to do whatever voice work this is. Put on your loudest formal-wear, allow an unhinged laser to give you …

On this dig back into past Patreon episodes, we travel back to 2021 when we thought it might be fun to cover another David Lynch movie since we had such fun with Blue Velvet. What a mistake., Jamie tries to get her husband to explain any part of this movie...and he won't, Doug makes some bold statements about just how bad this film is when it's pro…

On the nine year anniversary of the podcast, Jamie argues that a big part of women's rights might just include 'butt stuff', Doug tells his 'Sade story', and we both show our ignorance by not knowing what a credenza is. Hog-tie your boss with a telephone cord, slap on that Colonel Sanders costume, and join us as we are overwhelmed with delight gett…

On our latest episode, Doug argues for a better boob to dick ratio in movies from any decade, Jamie has more 'Butt-Trick' jokes in the chamber but decides they'd be in poor taste, and we both try and figure out how many people can be killed by gym equipment before a business is shut down. Get in your bee costume, seductively feed your partner aspar…

On our latest episode, Jamie spends most of the time drooling over this hunk of a Tarzan, Doug wonders of Tony Curtis brought his personal wardrobe to set, and we're bot unsure if this movie was actually enjoyable or if our expectations were just rock-bottom before hitting 'play'. Try and avoid feeding chimpanzees bacon and eggs, attempt to trade c…

Since first recording this episode the only update we have is that Jamie met Elisabeth Shue fully clothed in an airport bathroom and there were no primates in sight. In the latest episode, Doug reveals that while he still doesn't enjoy apes in film, he feels much more comfortable when they're wearing clothes, and Jamie becomes frustrated (as all sh…

On our latest episode, Doug gets such joy when describing a muscular gymnast attempting to choke out a child dressed as a clown, Jamie attempts to blow the listeners' minds by revealing that the monkey was a man in a suit, and we both are quite confused as to what exactly Jimmy Walker is trying to do in this movie. Be on the lookout for scorpions, …

We kick off 'Ape-ril' by digging back into Patreon and releasing an episode we covered for supporters only back in October 2021. On our latest episode, Jamie doesn't think this helper monkey/owner kiss was consensual, Doug gets such enjoyment over a man thrashing a monkey puppet like a dog with a chew toy, and we both agree that this poor guy just …

On our episode, Doug wonders what being married to Carol Kane must be like, Jamie suggests a method of getting more listeners that involves Doug's syllabi, and we both fall more deeply for Joe Bologna. Try and Keep Kramer out of your hotel room, put on your sexiest vampire outfit, and join us as we discuss the dreadfully unfunny, Transylvania 6-500…

On our episode, Jamie is just delighted to sit and watch a comedic romp where the monsters look like cuddly puppets, Doug forgets the show 'Growing Pains' because of getting high off of nutmeg, and we have a lengthy discussions about the cots and benefits of an electric can opener. Throw a 'boy searching party' at your house, chop off the head of a…

On our episode, Doug tries to describe the sound of a penis flopping out of pants, Jamie describes this film through cake and sandwich metaphors (both of which make less sense than the film itself), and we struggle to come to terms with our feelings on this film. Set up for a seance with your driver, don't make your cancer-ridden elderly father do …

On our episode, Jamie assumes that this film is a pretty accurate representation of Pittsburgh gang life, Doug is befuddled by just how stupid our title character is, and we devolve into fits of laughter throughout as it's been quite a while since we've reviewed anything that rises to this level of bonkers on the podcast. Break out your 'Rasta Stas…

On our episode, Doug tries Googling 'Ceiling Fan Dream Interpretation', Jamie busts out a new character dubbed 'Film Critic Jamie', and we both agree that this film is nothing but a cautionary tale regarding the importance of communicating with your partner. Be sure your cowboy hat matches the rest of your getup, get your photo-doctorin' sharpies r…

On our episode, Jamie reveals that her rock group would sing mostly candy-related tunes, Doug wonders if Debbie Harry just happened to wander onto set one afternoon as a big Family Ties fan, and we both agree that at this point in their careers Justine was out acting her brother and Billie was out Bette Midler-ing Seth Green. Lock your 'sex van', c…