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Welcome to The Conversation Factory, where I investigate how to create change through changing conversations. Each episode I'll talk to an amazing conversation designer about how to Amplify, Shift or Transform conversations in Organizations, Teams, Communities and our own lives. Visit www.theconversationfactory.com where I distill these insights we can bring into our work and lives.
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Many of us feel hurried, and hurry is costing us more than we realize. Unhurried Living provides resources and training to help people learn to live and lead from fullness rather than on empty. Great influence begins on the inside, in your soul. Learning healthy patterns of rest and work can transform your life—your daily influence. Built on more than twenty-five years of experience at the intersection of spiritual formation and leadership development, Unhurried Living seeks to inspire peopl ...
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Growing in grace is not about thinking less of yourself but thinking of yourself less. If you’ve ever felt like you’re struggling to grow or that life’s challenges keep setting you back, you’re not alone. The journey toward spiritual maturity is rarely straightforward, and it’s easy to feel like we’re not progressing the way we should. We live in a…
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Jodi Grubbs fell headlong into the endless rush and exhaustion of hustle culture. After leaving her childhood home on the island of Bonaire in the Caribbean, she had assumed the rapid pace and stress of city living in the States. Soon she realized God was bidding her to a return to the "island time" of her past. In time Jodi found sanctuary and way…
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When Jesus calls us to follow him, he invites into a narrow way—onto a narrow path. And narrow doesn’t immediate strike us as inviting. But Jesus also tells us that he’s come so that we could experience an abundant, rich life. That’s inviting. How does the narrow way of Jesus lead us to the sort of fullness he promises? In my first interview of the…
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Long gone are the days when I have the energy to put on any pretense when I talk with God. This has been a welcome and freeing change in my prayer life. At this point in my journey, it is much more life-giving to simply declare the way things are, rather than trying to tidy up my mess and present it in a nice, neat package. If I’m mad, sad, joyous …
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The second half of 2024 is well underway and so is the second half of the 2024 Cohort Program. Welcome back Alex Reegan (enneagram 8) and Darnell Young (enneagram 1)! Our third guest, Matt Lesser (8), couldn't join us for this conversation, but he'll be back at the end of the year for sure! Today's episode is fantastic: Is "triggered" still a term …
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Warning - this episode uses a specific curse word - a lot. And once we started using one, we started using more of them. So…if f-bombs, sprinkled like salt are not your cup of tea, this is a good episode to skip! My guest today is Rebecca R Block, PhD, who is an expert in helping organizations build programs, services and products that equip young …
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Over the summer, Gem and I are sharing some replays of our podcast we’re calling “Unhurried Favorites.” Today I’m sharing a conversation I had with two friends, Matt and Darrell, about the difference between “working for God” and “working with God.” It is among our most downloaded episodes.By Alan & Gem Fadling
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Over the summer, we are offering some episodes of our podcast we’re calling “Unhurried Favorites.” Today I’m sharing my interview with Suzanne Stabile. When we aired it last time, it was only a snippet of our conversation. Well, today, you can listen to it in it’s entirety. Most of us have no idea how others see or process their experiences. And th…
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Sometimes the bold goals we set out to achieve actually happen, and sometimes something even more amazing happens - something better than we can imagine. Usually that happens because of the people we meet along the way, the conversations we have, the unexpected connections we make that open up new doors - in a word, Serendipity. I had always wonder…
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Over the summer, we are sharing some replays of our podcast we’re calling “Unhurried Favorites.” Today I'm resharing an interview with Curt Thompson, MD about his book The Soul of Desire. I found so many intersections with what Gem and I have been learning in our journey towards wholeness and vitality in our life in God. In this book, Curt talks ab…
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Meet The Justice Doula, Micky ScottBey Jones! Originally mistyped as an 8, which makes a ton of sense, she found her inner critic and her "inner BFF" as an Enneagram 1, and no accompanies others as they birth precious things into the world like love, empathy, self-compassion, liberation, healing and resilience. You can find out more about Micky at …
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Over the summer, we are sharing some replays of our podcast we’re calling “Unhurried Favorites.” Today I’m talking about time, and whether we have enough of it. It's a refreshed vision of time…one that doesn’t leave us feeling pressured. ________________________________________________ Follow Gem on Instagram and grab a copy of her new book Hold Th…
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Art has the power to change and even lead the conversation, to spark curiosity and fuel real engagement. But what comes first in a powerful creative project? The idea and the message? The tools and the talent? Or The Funding, that can make or break it all? My guest today is Benjamin Von Wong, who creates art on a grand scale that goes beyond awe. H…
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We've officially named Luke the first member of The Enneagram Journey 5 Timer Club! It's a big deal. Not as big a deal though as his latest book, How To Love The Life You Already Have. If you're looking for the Richard Rohr books Suzanne suggests to read in order (he has many more great ones!) here they are: Everything Belongs, The Naked Now, Falli…
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In my book, An Unhurried Life, I wrote a chapter titled “Productivity: Unhurried Isn’t Lazy,” in part, to speak to our tendency to assume that productivity is always about doing more and more and more. But what if true productivity is, at least in part, about doing qualitatively better work, even if it seems less busy than before? There is a cultur…
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If life were a house, then every room holds a story. What do we do when a room we’re in is no longer a room where we belong? What do you do when you start to feel a shift and must decide if it’s time to make a change? When it comes to navigating big decisions about when to stay and go, how can we know for sure when the time is right? Though we ente…
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Enneagram 8, Tony Jones, steps out of the woods and into The Micah Center to sit down with Suzanne and her husband, Rev. Joseph Stabile, to talk about his latest book, The God of Wild Places. “One of the things I like about the wilderness is that it is not controllable. We’ve paved too many wild places.” If you haven't read The God of Wild Places y…
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How do prayer and leadership relate to each other? Looking at the lives of some leaders, it seems like prayer is incidental to leadership at best. For others, it’s a personal priority that doesn’t seem to impact leadership in any obvious way. For still others, prayer is like an on-ramp, preparatory for the work of leadership but largely left behind…
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I love watching travel and cooking shows, so if there’s a show that combines the two, I’m hooked. If you are familiar with the names Phil Rosenthal, Guy Fieri and Andrew Zimmern, then you know what I’m talking about. Traveling, eating tasty food, and meeting intriguing people is a combination my heart longs for. I’ve often mentioned to Alan that if…
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In An Unhurried Leader, I shared that I’ve often been tempted to prove something about myself through the work I do. I behave as though my value is uncertain and needs to be earned or achieved. It isn’t and it doesn’t. To use a theological category, my worth is more a matter of grace rather than a matter of works. That sort of insecurity has been a…
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"You can’t treat what you haven’t diagnosed and you can’t diagnose what you haven’t assessed." - Chanel Dokun "You can't fix what you can't name." - Suzanne Stabile Yeah, the two of them could talk for way longer than an hour! But, for today, let's meet Enneagram One, Chanel Dokun. She is a mother of two, life coach, speaker, and author of Life Sta…
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Unhurried Living is now in its ninth year of serving Christian leaders around the world. We’ve come to some small inflection points in the past, but we are in the midst of another, important time in our ministry. We are adding to our team! Today I am introducing you to Jodie Niznik and Matt Fogle. They are two stellar leaders who are going to link …
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Today my guests are Lisa Kay Solomon and Chris Ertel, the co-authors of the powerhouse 2014 book Moments of Impact: How to Design Strategic Conversations That Accelerate Change, which celebrates its 10th anniversary this year! I devoured this book 10 years ago and I think you might enjoy it, too! Lisa Kay Solomon is currently a Designer in Residenc…
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The cross is the heart of Scripture. Everything about the gospel message leads to the cross, and proceeds from the cross. In fact, within the narrative of Scripture, the crucifixion of Jesus is literally the crux of the story―the axis upon which the biblical story turns. But it would be a mistake to think we could sum up the significance of the cru…
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The highly anticipated second part of our conversation with Alison McCrary (enneagram 3) is here! The Reverend (Joseph Stabile) takes host duties in today's episode as he and Alison talk about their callings and their journey. Alison started Methodist and now is Catholic. Joe started Catholic and now is Methodist. Wow, the journey they've been on! …
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My guest today is Ashley Goodall, a leadership expert who has spent his career exploring large organizations from the inside, most recently as an executive at Cisco. He is the co-author of Nine Lies About Work, which was selected as the best management book of 2019 by Strategy + Business and as one of Amazon’s best business and leadership books of …
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In the retelling of the Mary and Martha story, many inadvertently pit these sisters against each another. We are forced to make a choice: “I’m a Mary” or, more regularly I hear, “I’m a Martha.” As though these women were tropes or types on a personality test. This is unfortunate, because then we are drawn to take sides and defend one or the other. …
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Rabbi Tarfon said: The day is short, and the work is plentiful…It is not your duty to finish the work, but neither are you at liberty to neglect it. (Pirkei Avot 2:15-16) My conversation today with Jerry Colonna closes with him paraphrasing this powerful notion - and the work we are discussing is the work on yourself and the work to create a better…
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What do we mean when we talk about the importance of prayer? What is prayer? Is it mainly the words we say to God about our concerns, our needs, our hopes, our desires? What is the difference, if any, between saying prayers and being prayerful? Today, I’m sharing a conversation with a wise Franciscan priest who has been practicing prayerfulness for…
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God's face is always shining toward us. Our God is not asleep, nor indifferent. But we don't always experience this nearness or the depth of how beloved we truly are--especially if we have experienced neglect, betrayal, or indifference in our formative human relationships. In her book, The Emmanuel Promise, Summer Joy Gross acts as a nurturing guid…
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"A contemplative practice is any act, habitually entered into with your whole heart, as a way of awakening, deepening, and sustaining a contemplative experience of the inherent holiness of the present moment." -James Finley What an honor it is to have Alison McCrary join us on The Enneagram Journey! Who knows the people you might get to talk to whe…
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My guests today are Rei Wang and Anita Hossain, Co-founders of coaching platform The Grand, which was seed funded by Alexis Ohanian’s firm Seven Seven Six in 2023. Rei is the Chief Product Officer and Anita is the CEO. I met Rei ages ago, in her early days in NYC at General Assembly, where she worked as a Product Manager and Global Community Lead, …
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I’ve written and said plenty about the problem of hurry in our lives and in our world. There is a condition called hurry sickness, which is the feeling of always being rushed as though you were lagging behind in some race. This raises our stress levels. A sense that we don’t have enough time for everything we have to do is a sign of hurry sickness.…
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For the last few years I have enjoyed meeting with women in coaching groups or soul care groups. It is such a beautiful and vulnerable way to share our lives. The women who attend are always leaning in toward God and desiring to connect at a deeper level with others. A while back I decided I wanted to share with these women the scriptures that have…
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For too many, work feels tedious, painful, even meaningless. And we don’t seem to know what to do about it. There is a familiar crisis of meaning and of sustainability. You’ve probably heard the alarming statistics: how so many who lost work during the pandemic just aren’t interested in returning to their jobs. We need to find a way out of disinteg…
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As young children its easy to pick up beliefs and behaviors that seem to work for us, but as we move into adulthood, we find that is no longer the case. Today, I’m going to share with you a personal story of how one of my early unhelpful behaviors was transformed by God into something beautiful and useful for me today. _____________________________…
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In the summer of 2023, I finally got the opportunity to make a retreat at a place I’ve been wanting to visit for years. I drove up to the New Camaldoli Hermitage in Big Sur, California for an eight-day silent retreat. I’ve done week-long retreats before on the East Coast, but never here in California. I’ve been wanting to share the story of my expe…
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Meet Enneagram Eight, Matt Lesser, the third third of the first third of our series with three members of the 2024 Enneagram Cohort! The man has done some work, and he shares his journey with us beginning with a life threatening illness when he was 15, depression in his twenties, and his dark night of the soul. He left the corporate world in 2021 a…
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One of my mentors often liked to ask a couple of simple questions when we were together: first, “What is the Christian life?” and second, “What is the church?” At first glance, those feel like beginner questions. Of course we know what a Christian is and what church is about. But how many of our assumptions about our life in Christ together look mo…
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Women have been important leaders throughout church history. There are multiple stories in the Old and New Testaments about the powerful and unique ways women lead. Think Deborah, Ruth, Esther, Mary Magdalene, Mary the mother of Jesus, Phoebe, Priscilla and more. There are the desert mothers, and women such as Julian of Norwich, Clare of Assisi and…
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Having written a book about anxiety, I’ve seen a lot of promises about how to solve it. A life hack here. Six easy steps there. But my own experience with anxiety has been anything but easy. Today, I want to share some of the more unexpected pathways to peace I’ve discovered in my journey. ____________________________________________________ Connec…
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Hard. Crusty. Unyielding. Rootless. Shallow. Burning out. Withering. Thorny. Distracted. Choked. Pressed. Good. Healthy. Vibrant. Thriving. What is this list of (mostly disturbing) words I’ve just uttered? Especially when the title of this episode includes, “A Gracious Reflection.” Well, it’s a list that came to mind upon a recent encounter with th…
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