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140: When Shame and "Self Pity" Dissolves Connection and Breaks Down the Conversation

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Manage episode 411928756 series 2865604
Content provided by Sam Tielemans, LMFT, Sam Tielemans, and LMFT. All podcast content including episodes, graphics, and podcast descriptions are uploaded and provided directly by Sam Tielemans, LMFT, Sam Tielemans, and LMFT or their podcast platform partner. If you believe someone is using your copyrighted work without your permission, you can follow the process outlined here https://player.fm/legal.

How do the conversations go when you talk about her pain?

Do they end with you feeling closer or further apart? Do you feel hopeless and inadequate, not knowing what to say to help her feel comforted?

For a wife, not getting the understanding and validation she needs creates hurt and anger, and the conversations just stall out leaving them both alone.

In this episode I share with you one of the main reasons why that happens and 2 things you can implement to change that dynamic.

For therapy with Sam:

I will work with you for 12 weeks to help you eliminate pornography use and the root cause that started it.

If after the 12 weeks you haven’t fully been able to quit, I’ll work with you 1-1 for free until you do.

Go to stopporn.info for more information about working with me directly.

Follow Me on Instagram for daily tips and tools you can implement to overcome pornography addiction.

Join the free, private men’s Facebook community here for Q&As, live trainings, tools, and support:

https://www.facebook.com/groups/toolstoquit

Want access to a free course I created for my podcast listeners?

Simply go to www.coupleshealing.org and in the course you'll learn some top strategies to find healing from addiction and trauma, rebuild trust, experience freedom, and begin to reconnect with each other in the relationship.

  continue reading

153 episodes

Artwork
iconShare
 
Manage episode 411928756 series 2865604
Content provided by Sam Tielemans, LMFT, Sam Tielemans, and LMFT. All podcast content including episodes, graphics, and podcast descriptions are uploaded and provided directly by Sam Tielemans, LMFT, Sam Tielemans, and LMFT or their podcast platform partner. If you believe someone is using your copyrighted work without your permission, you can follow the process outlined here https://player.fm/legal.

How do the conversations go when you talk about her pain?

Do they end with you feeling closer or further apart? Do you feel hopeless and inadequate, not knowing what to say to help her feel comforted?

For a wife, not getting the understanding and validation she needs creates hurt and anger, and the conversations just stall out leaving them both alone.

In this episode I share with you one of the main reasons why that happens and 2 things you can implement to change that dynamic.

For therapy with Sam:

I will work with you for 12 weeks to help you eliminate pornography use and the root cause that started it.

If after the 12 weeks you haven’t fully been able to quit, I’ll work with you 1-1 for free until you do.

Go to stopporn.info for more information about working with me directly.

Follow Me on Instagram for daily tips and tools you can implement to overcome pornography addiction.

Join the free, private men’s Facebook community here for Q&As, live trainings, tools, and support:

https://www.facebook.com/groups/toolstoquit

Want access to a free course I created for my podcast listeners?

Simply go to www.coupleshealing.org and in the course you'll learn some top strategies to find healing from addiction and trauma, rebuild trust, experience freedom, and begin to reconnect with each other in the relationship.

  continue reading

153 episodes

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