Breaking Up & Moving On

Life in Relationship

Topic: Topic: How do you break up well?How do I know it’s healthy to start dating again after a divorce or breakup?

• The weightiness of breakups
• Reminding us of our need as humans for intimacy
• There are ways to do break ups “better”, but no way to do it “easy”

Keep it classy, kind, and clear

• Break ups are in a moment, but the work of a break up is long term
• face to face universally preferred in the research
• What do you need and what needs healing?
• Find your support people
• Consider the impact on relationships beyond yourself

Allow for emotions

• Give opportunity to process for yourself and your break up partner
• let complex emotions be there, just listen and then move forward
• Own what needs to be owned, don’t own what isn’t yours
• Dave’s wisdom = “It’s not you, it’s us.”
• space before friendship
• Happier music video: https://youtu.be/m7Bc3pLyij0

Give yourself time and space for the grief

• Set needed boundaries
• Homeostasis, getting to normalcy and comfort
• Pay attention to your internal dialogue and engage in healthy and aware self-talk
• A good time to engage in your spiritual life for foundation safety/comfort
• Space in communication
• disenfranchised grief and awareness of the stages of grief
• markers for “moving on”

Eternal Sunshine of the Spotless Mind: https://www.imdb.com/title/tt0338013/

Necessary Endings: https://amzn.to/3PD8Q4Q

Short answer: Keep it classy and give yourself time.