Growth Beyond Trauma
Manage episode 353298854 series 3005747
Over the past 35 years, Agape Garcia has navigated through domestic violence, privacy, safety, vulnerability, and the mindset to endure personal adverse events in life.
Agape moved 1,000 miles away to join her mate who had relocated. Eight months pregnant, Agape found some remnants of another female's things in her things. She questioned him about it. He threw her down and held her down by her neck while punching her head. She heard her daughter's scared voice and her feet slammed on the floor. She thrusted him off of her to protect her daughter. She has no idea how she had the strength to do so, jump up, grab her daughter and run out with her child in pajamas and barefoot.
She had left everything she knew, used a neighbor's phone to call the police for help. She was not going to go back home. The doctors restricted her travel due to her high-risk pregnancy. She had no friends or family where she was. Due in 47 days, she convinced the doctors to do a C-section in 37 days. She left her job voluntarily from the previous state, so she had no unemployment coming. She could not get a new job since she was so pregnant, and found herself standing in line for food stamps, emergency shelter and assistance.
She had no phone, no electricity and no gas in the car. She asked neighbors if her daughter could play with their children so she could find a way forward for them. She rented a room for her new-born, her daughter and her.
During her journey to overcome, Garcia learned that extreme independence is a trauma driven response and a natural one which can be defeated through focused, self-awareness and intentional control.
She was focused on protecting and providing. After this trauma and without family and friends, she was not able to trust anyone. Her kids were in care for 12 hours a day.
When her daughter became an adult and moved out, she told Agape that she was not emotionally available for her. Agape did not have time to get into her feelings. But going forward, she worked to show her daughter affection.
Agape's mother left her when she was two years old - which made her dedicated to stay with her children. Her father checked out - he worked a full night shift and slept all day. Her mother left a toxic relationship. Agape believes she received trauma gestionally. It took a while for Agape to develop emotional intelligence.
Agape navigated through various self-help centers, state, city, local programs, systems and assistance to create a stable foundation for her family while providing the ability to assist others. She also volunteers and collaborates with local legislators in support of bills under Public Safety. She worked with Internal Affairs reviewing complaints. She received hands-on training from the Sheriff’s department, Department of Homeland Security, and FEMA which also led to the Infrastructure Liaison Officer designation (ILO), through the local Law Enforcement Center.
She has developed programs with leadership responsible for security and emergency management. These emphasize awareness toward identifying different stages of human behavior leading towards violence mitigation.
Her commitment is to provide lifelong transformational habits. Her laser focus teachings are on aligning your mental and emotional belief system. She had a desperation to survive and established BYIS, a means of empowering others to Be Your Incredible Self.
Garcia believes in the need to feel loved, wanted, and cared for as a part of life in all of us. She learned to apply a controlled healthy mindset to break unhealthy cycles. Today, she prides herself on meeting
93 episodes