We Hate Movies (podcast)

We Hate Movies

Episode 352 - Lost in Space1:54:21

3d ago1:54:21

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1:54:21

On this week's episode, the gang welcomes back their good friend, and WHM Disaster Movie Expert, Justin J. Case to chat about the TV-to-Film adaptation, Lost in Space! Why does that intro narration sound like we missed the first 30 seconds? How much scenery is Oscar-winner Gary Oldman chewing? And what is with that spider? PLUS: Andrew and Chri ...…

We Hate Movies

Episode 350 - Wild Hogs1:50:33

10d ago1:50:33

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1:50:33

On this week's episode, the gang chats about the 100-minute motorcycle gay joke, Wild Hogs! What a wretched undertaking this whole thing is—who is this for? Why did the screenwriters, director and actors all feel it necessary to cram in all these wretched, panicky, gay jokes? Why can't we root for the Del Fuegos instead of the Wild Hogs? And wh ...…

We Hate Movies

Episode 349 - Shrek1:51:42

17d ago1:51:42

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1:51:42

On this week's episode, the guys go to Toon Town to talk about the doesn't-really-hold-up fan favorite, Shrek! Does that ogre eat its own feces? How many fart jokes can you fit in before the opening credits finish? And was Lord Farquaad getting ready to pleasure himself and make the Magic Mirror watch? PLUS: A writer for Gangbang Monthly gets h ...…

We Hate Movies

WHM Mail Bag: Backfiring Prank Calls, Watching "The Jerky Boys" On 9/11, and After-Hours Movie Theater Sexcapades57:17

22d ago57:17

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57:17

On this month's dive into the WHM Mail Bag, the guys read letters about prank call victims getting revenge, people forever associating 9/11 with the Jerky Boys, after hours theater sex-hijinks, pushy foot fetishists, and one lucky listener who got to share the stage with Gallagher! If you have a question for the gang, or want your crazy story r ...…

We Hate Movies

Episode 348 - I Know Who Killed Me1:29:33

24d ago1:29:33

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1:29:33

On this week's episode, the 2018 Listener Request Month mercifully comes to an end with the absolutely ridiculous, I Know Who Killed Me! Is this a movie within a movie, or is this actually a movie within a movie within a movie? Is this supposed to be a horror film or not? And where did that cigarette go? PLUS: George Lucas taunts Spielberg, Abr ...…

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Episode 347 - Tarzan the Ape Man (1981)1:38:43

1M ago1:38:43

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1:38:43

On this week's episode, the 2018 Listener Request Month rolls on with the totally insane perv-a-thon film no one asked for, 1981's Tarzan the Ape Man! What a TRASH pile of a film! Why do we have to wait 45 minutes for Tarzan to show up? Did we need all those sexy incestuous overtones from Richard Harris? And what the ever-loving shit was John D ...…

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Episode 346 - I'll Always Know What You Did Last Summer1:40:37

1M ago1:40:37

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1:40:37

On the latest episode from the 2018 Listener Request Month selections, the gang talks about the absolutely terrible horror sequel, I'll Always Know What You Did Last Summer! Who in the world thought taking this franchise in a paranormal direction was a good idea? Couldn't they cast a single notable actor in this film? And who were these kids tr ...…

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Episode 345 - Maximum Overdrive (Live in Austin)50:41

1M ago50:41

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50:41

Recorded at the North Door in Austin, Texas On this special bonus episode, the gang is live from Austin chatting about the absolute misfire that is Stephen King's Maximum Overdrive! What is supposed to be suspenseful about these silly trucks? What is with the mandatory AC/DC soundtrack? And how much cocaine is too much cocaine for a directorial ...…

We Hate Movies

Episode 343 - The Jerky Boys1:33:28

1M ago1:33:28

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1:33:28

On this week's episode, the gang kicks off the 2018 Listener Request Month with one of the absolute most abhorrent things anyone has ever tried to call a a movie, The Jerky Boys! Who's the fool who thought two prank phone call-making schlubs would translate into charismatic film actors? How was Alan Arkin tricked into sleep-acting through this ...…

We Hate Movies

WHM On-Screen: The 2018 Academy Awards45:31

2M ago45:31

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45:31

On this year's very special WHM Oscar Special, the gang makes their predictions as to who will take home what this year, but also rants about who they think should actually win! Will Laurie Metcalf pull it out from under Allison Janney? Why in the world did Meryl Streep get nominated for The Post? Will the stupid Academy acknowledge the greatne ...…

We Hate Movies

WHM Mail Bag: Movie Theater Bathroom Breaks, After Prom at the Movies, and Dads Ruining Movie Dates52:51

2M ago52:51

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52:51

On this month's Mail Bag, the guys welcome special guest, Jonathan Braylock, from Black Men Can't Jump (In Hollywood)! This month, we're talking: putting off bathroom breaks at the movies, kids ditching the after prom party to make out at the multiplex, dads ruining movie dates, and overzealous multiplex employees! Be sure to catch BMCJ & WHM i ...…

We Hate Movies

Episode 342 - Death Wish V: The Face of Death1:46:22

2M ago1:46:22

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1:46:22

This week on the program, the guys head back to Bronson with the ridiculous & sad sequel, Death Wish V: The Face of Death! How is a 71 year-old Charles Bronson supposed to be at all menacing? Why, when going into Witness Protection, would Paul Kersey be allowed to keep his first name and work in pretty much the same career? And how are you bill ...…

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WHM On-Screen: Black Panther49:23

2M ago49:23

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49:23

On this very special WHM On-Screen, the guys chat about the most excellent new Marvel film, Black Panther! Finally, a Marvel film to marvel at! Finally, a Marvel movie with a sympathetic, well-constructed villain! Finally, a gorgeously produced, excellently acted, brilliantly written Marvel movie that doesn't mention or feature Thanos! Finally, ...…

We Hate Movies

Episode 341 - Traces of Red1:31:46

2M ago1:31:46

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1:31:46

On this week's episode, the gang discusses the dirty-ass, Jim Belushi erotic thriller, Traces of Red! Who in their ever-loving mind thought it was a good idea to cast Jim Belushi as this sexy Lothario detective—besides Jim himself, of course? Why couldn't Tony Goldwyn share top billing? And what's with Lorraine Bracco's cough/laugh? PLUS: Domin ...…

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Episode 340 - You've Got Mail1:44:07

2M ago1:44:07

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1:44:07

On this week's special Valentine's Day episode, the gang chats about the 1998 cyber thriller, You've Got Mail! How are we supposed to feel any sympathy for this billionaire creep, Joe Fox? How is a massive bookstore company still run like a family business? And just how f*ckable is Greg Kinnear in this one? PLUS: Please note that guys who are o ...…

We Hate Movies

Episode 338 - Blade: Trinity (Live at the Brooklyn Podcast Festival!)1:29:23

2M ago1:29:23

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1:29:23

Recorded live at The Bell House in Brooklyn, New York On this week's episode, it's the guys' set from the 2017 Brooklyn Podcast Festival! At this blessed event, WHM continued the beloved celebration known as Snipesgiving by taking down the wretched sequel, Blade: Trinity! Why did they introduce all these lame white people to "team up" with Blad ...…

We Hate Movies

WHM Mail Bag: Film Critic Run-Ins, Sleepover Film Selections, and Disastrous Midnight Movie Experiences1:00:06

3M ago1:00:06

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1:00:06

On January's WHM Mail Bag, the gang reads letters about film critics they've met, bad film selections for sleepovers, unfortunate midnight movie experiences, abrupt screening shut downs, Jim Belushi's on-set demands, passing out from movie violence, and people throwing up at the movies! PLUS: Steve and Chris celebrate the addition of ER to Hulu ...…

We Hate Movies

Episode 337 - Going in Style1:28:28

3M ago1:28:28

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1:28:28

On this week's episode, the gang brings (Some of) The Worst of 2017 month to a close with a conversation around Zach Braff's Going in Style! Why do these old fellas insist on debasing themselves with these trash films? Why opt for multiple "straight man" character actors and leave all the comedy to the single comedian in the main cast... of thi ...…

We Hate Movies

Episode 336 - Geostorm1:36:07

3M ago1:36:07

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1:36:07

On this week's episode, it's the second-to-last (Some of) The Worst of 2017 episode and the gang is tackling Geostorm! How is this not just a disaster movie, but also a space adventure and political thriller? How does Jim Sturgess still have that haircut? And where the hell did Richard Schiff go? PLUS: Roger Clinton's Secret Service detail is t ...…

We Hate Movies

Episode 335 - The Bye Bye Man1:50:27

3M ago1:50:27

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1:50:27

On this week's episode, (Some of) The Worst of 2017 month continues with the stunningly bad horror film, The Bye Bye Man! Why in the world would people move into a house and use other people's old furniture that's been left there for years? What's the deal with these three friends and their living situation? And who honestly thought the design ...…

We Hate Movies

Episode 334 - The Fate of the Furious1:50:01

3M ago1:50:01

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1:50:01

On this week's episode, the gang continues their (Some of) The Worst of 2017 month with a trip to Franchise Town talking about the latest entry in the car enthusiast/sort of domestic terrorists series, The Fate of the Furious! Why are they bothering to ask us to believe Vin Diesel flipped on the fam? What's with Charlize Theron's stupid dreads? ...…

We Hate Movies

Episode 332 - The Boss Baby1:35:52

4M ago1:35:52

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1:35:52

On this week's episode, the gang kicks off 2018 with (Some of) The Worst of 2017 month and the absolutely horrifying family film, The Boss Baby! What are the dynamics of birthing babies in this world? Are these things living forever in some kind of babies-only heaven? And make a decision on whether or not you're animating genitalia! PLUS: Cooki ...…

We Hate Movies

Episode 331 - Constantine: Live! at the Los Angeles Podcast Festival1:35:22

4M ago1:35:22

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1:35:22

On the final episode of the year—dropping a day early for Christmas!—it's the gang's live appearance at the 2017 Los Angeles Podcast Festival talking Constantine! Recorded at the Millennium Biltmore Hotel's Biltmore Bowl, this movie had the gang asking questions like: How can a person live above a bowling alley comfortably? Why not have an Engl ...…

We Hate Movies

WHM Mail Bag: Watching "8MM" in School, Almost Giving Birth While Listening to WHM, and "Christmas Film or Action Film?"46:32

4M ago46:32

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46:32

On the final WHM Mail Bag of the year, the guys read letters about fans almost giving birth while listening to the show, students watching the film 8MM in class, a story proving the Kennedy Fuck Tunnels exist, and someone's taste in movies ruins Christmas for the whole family! They also answer the most important question of the season: is Die H ...…

We Hate Movies

WHM On-Screen: Star Wars: Episode VIII - The Last Jedi53:59

4M ago53:59

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53:59

On this very special On-Screen, the guys share their (potentially controversial) thoughts on the all-new saga entry, Star Wars: Episode VIII - The Last Jedi! There is much talk of Luke Skywalker, porgs, Chewbacca's piloting skills, risky lightsaber misunderstandings, parking on the beach, adult babies, fan expectations, Yoda's comedy career, an ...…

We Hate Movies

Episode 330 - Pottersville1:32:30

4M ago1:32:30

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1:32:30

On this week's special Christmas episode, the gang breaks the Ten Year Rule to tackle the absolutely absurd, but totally one-of-a-kind, Pottersville! How can anyone watch this without being terrified Michael Shannon will snap at any second? What's with this terrible parody of Quint from Jaws? And who thought this "Australian" character was goin ...…

We Hate Movies

Episode 329 - Hard to Kill1:42:56

4M ago1:42:56

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1:42:56

On this week's episode, the guys discuss the best (?) Steven Seagal movie, Hard to Kill! Why is Mason Storm—great name by the way—so obsessed with getting home to watch the Oscars? Who secretly films the Mafia using a gigantic shotgun mic? And what's the situation with giving Seagal a sponge bath while he's in the hospital? PLUS: A magic cat th ...…

We Hate Movies

Episode 328 - The Punisher (2004)1:38:31

5M ago1:38:31

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1:38:31

On this week's episode, the gang ventures back into the world of Marvel Comics with the 2004 misfire, The Punisher! What's with this destination wedding-style family reunion the Castle Clan is throwing? How was this dye job approved by the producers? And how do you have John Travolta play your villain and you don't let him tap dance all over th ...…

We Hate Movies

WHM Mail Bag: Taking Mom to the Movies, Lying About Hating "Collateral Beauty," and Falling Asleep on Toilets47:02

5M ago47:02

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47:02

On this month's WHM Mail Bag, the gang reads letters about moms taking kids to inappropriate movies accidentally, people getting caught lying about not hating Collateral Beauty, Sean Connery golfing, pre-teens taking innocent grandmothers to sexy thrillers, watching movies on bootlegs, and sleeping in airplane bathrooms! If you want your questi ...…

We Hate Movies

WHM On-Screen: The 2017 Superhero Round-Up56:17

5M ago56:17

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56:17

On this special WHM On-Screen, the gang gathers to chat about all the superhero nonsense that's happened at the movies this year. Topics of discussion include: the Avengers: Infinity War trailer, Thor: Ragnarock, superhero film rankings, and, yes, Justice League! And of course, SPOILERS ABOUND! Also: This Saturday we're recording the final mail ...…

We Hate Movies

Episode 327 - Drop Zone1:38:50

5M ago1:38:50

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1:38:50

On this week's episode, we sadly bring Snipesgiving to an end with an all-time Wesley fave, Drop Zone! How is Michael Jeter allowed to play with kittens in jail? What's with all the mid-air pranks? And look at Busey bite that hand! PLUS: Finally, some good news to report on SNN, the Skydiving News Network! Drop Zone stars Wesley Snipes, Gary Bu ...…

We Hate Movies

Episode 326 - Murder at 16001:24:02

5M ago1:24:02

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1:24:02

On this week's episode, it's Snipesgiving the week of Thanksgiving as the guys chat about the Washington D.C. turkey-pardoning thriller, Murder at 1600! What's with all the huge battleground models Wesley's character has built in his apartment? Were those Kennedy sex tunnels real? And who in the world thought Dennis Miller would be a good fit f ...…

We Hate Movies

Episode 325 - The Fan1:43:52

5M ago1:43:52

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1:43:52

On this week's episode, the blessed month of Snipesgiving rolls on with Tony Scott's 1996 baseball thriller, The Fan! What's with everyone demanding Bobby Rayburn hit them a home run? Did anyone check the lyrics in the song choices during shots of child actors? And who wouldn't have a security team on hand when firing this total lunatic knife s ...…

We Hate Movies

Episode 324 - Rising Sun1:27:02

5M ago1:27:02

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1:27:02

On this week's episode, the guys kick off the blessed month of Snipesgiving with the one and only Michael Crichton snooze, Rising Sun! What's with that terrible interrogation framing device they barely use? Why couldn't they find better lines and a stronger subplot for Steve Buscemi? And how in the world do you make us wait a whole eleven minut ...…

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Episode 323 - Trick or Treat (1986)1:21:15

6M ago1:21:15

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1:21:15

On this week's episode, the WHM Halloween Spooktacular comes to an end as the guys have some fun with 1986's Trick or Treat! What's with this kid's horrible nickname? Why didn't the writers set any boundaries with the powers this ghost/demon has? And what was with that cowboy hat, Gene Simmons? PLUS: The Trickster gets kicked out of Sammi Curr' ...…

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WHM Mail Bag: L.A. Letter Readin' (w/ Amir Blumenfeld!)58:38

6M ago58:38

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58:38

Recorded at the HeadGum studio in sunny Los Angeles! On a very special WHM Mail Bag, the gang welcomes If I Were You's Amir Blumenfeld on to read letters about earthquakes, giving up on rotten movies, bad date etiquette, Halloween pranks gone awry, parents showing their young kids inappropriate horror films, and sexy escapades gone terribly, te ...…

We Hate Movies

WHM On-Screen: Horror Franchise Wars: A Nightmare on Elm Street55:15

6M ago55:15

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55:15

Happy Halloween, gang! Just in time for the year's greatest holiday, we're here to rank the A Nightmare on Elm Street franchise! With wretched jokes, ridiculous back stories, actually produced fan fiction, a crude remake, and one Grade-A Tom Arnold/Roseanne Barr cameo, the Nightmare franchise has somehow aged into one of the worst of the "big" ...…

We Hate Movies

Episode 322 - Saw1:34:32

6M ago1:34:32

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1:34:32

This week on the program, the 2017 Halloween Spooktacular pulls back into Franchise Town by discussing the 2004 extreeeeeme smash hit, Saw! How does Jigsaw lay on that floor for so long without cramping? Did he really need the puppet after all that other Mouse Trap nonsense? And how many times have the people making this movie seen Se7en? PLUS: ...…

We Hate Movies

Episode 321 - Scream 21:47:01

6M ago1:47:01

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1:47:01

On this week's episode, the gang goes back to Craven Country to discuss the bloated sequel, Scream 2! What's with all the emotional scenes reuniting characters from the first movie? How are we supposed to believe that Laurie Metcalf lifted Jamie Kennedy up off the ground? And why does David Warner insist on this college theater production conti ...…

We Hate Movies

Episode 320 - Dr. Giggles1:29:48

6M ago1:29:48

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1:29:48

On this week's episode, the 2017 Halloween Spooktacular takes a sick day with the ridiculously fun 90's slasher, Dr. Giggles! What's with this veteran cop wearing NFL merchandise? Who's responsible for that horrendous prop vanilla ice cream? How did this film never get a sequel—direct to DVD or otherwise? And what's with this kid and his mom's ...…

We Hate Movies

Episode 319 - Freddy's Dead: The Final Nightmare1:28:59

7M ago1:28:59

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1:28:59

On this week's episode, we kick off the 2017 Halloween Spooktacular by tackling the super-silly, super-stupid, Freddy sequel, Freddy's Dead: The Final Nightmare! Why did they stop trying to make these movies scary? What's with those quotes at the beginning? And did anyone really care to learn this much about Freddy's back story? PLUS: We play a ...…

We Hate Movies

Episode 318 - Samurai Cop1:34:42

7M ago1:34:42

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1:34:42

On this week's episode, the gang finally gets around to a hotly anticipated title, the absolutely fun and ridiculous, Samurai Cop! The final selection in the now-defunct Patreon Selects tier, this D-Grade cult classic features one of the worst wigs in cinema history, no less than five parking lot fight scenes, and several goons on PCP! PLUS: Pa ...…

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Episode 317 - If Looks Could Kill1:29:57

7M ago1:29:57

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1:29:57

On this week's episode, the guys go back to school with the spectacularly ridiculous, high school spy comedy, If Looks Could Kill! Why doesn't Richard Grieco just sit these people down and explain the situation calmly? How often were they waxing his eyebrows on set? And how much of this film was stolen by later Bond films—or was it the other wa ...…

We Hate Movies

WHM Mail Bag - Alt-Right Blind Dates, Grade School Toy Theft, and Puking at the Movies58:07

7M ago58:07

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58:07

On the first WHM Mail Bag of season 8, the guys read letters from listeners about accidentally going on a blind date with a racist, sleazy creeps in grade school stealing toys from their friends, throwing up while watching Fellowship of the Ring, and more! If YOU want YOUR weird stories read on the air, or if you have questions for the gang, wr ...…

We Hate Movies

Episode 316 - It (1990)1:37:21

7M ago1:37:21

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1:37:21

On the SEASON EIGHT premiere of WHM, the guys return just in time to have some fun with the cult classic TV gem, It! Why did they make this movie for ABC and not for the theaters? Did the It monster kill off the dinosaurs? And what is with that ponytail?! PLUS: Harry Anderson and Richard Dean Anderson get mixed up... a lot. It stars Tim Curry, ...…

We Hate Movies

Episode 315 - Mac and Me1:21:49

8M ago1:21:49

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1:21:49

Recorded live at the Bell House in Brooklyn, NY — 8/05/17 On this week's episode, the guys finally get around to trashing the feature-length McDonald's commercial, Mac and Me! How is it these alien puppets' mouths were shaped so it was impossible for them to eat McDonald's products? Why didn't that mother tell those kids about the cliff? And yo ...…

We Hate Movies

WHM On-Screen: Game of Thrones Season 71:03:12

8M ago1:03:12

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1:03:12

On this special WHM On-Screen, the guys gather 'round to chat about the seventh—and shortest!—season of HBO's Game of Thrones! What's with all the wonky and wacky geography that's going on in this season? Does the shortened season hurt the show or help it? And was Maisie Williams taking notes from Anthony Hopkins? PLUS: Game of Thrones and Marr ...…

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WHM Summer Rewind - One Magic Christmas1:05:48

8M ago1:05:48

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1:05:48

On the final Summer Rewind of the year, the gang reminisces about their favorite holiday special, the episode on One Magic Christmas! How in the world did something so depressing qualify as a Christmas film? Who thought casting the legendary Harry Dean Stanton as an angel was a good idea—give that person a raise! And did that dude really say "D ...…

We Hate Movies

Episode 314 - Over the Top: Live! in Portland1:18:29

8M ago1:18:29

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1:18:29

Recorded live, Saturday, June 24th, 2017 On this week's episode, it's the second recording of two sold-out shows the guys played in Portland, Oregon earlier this summer. Fresh from an awesome not-for-profit bar in town, the guys lovingly ripped apart the beloved Stallone classic, Over the Top! Why doesn't the movie tell you the reason Stallone ...…

We Hate Movies

WHM Summer Rewind - Star Trek: Insurrection1:23:07

8M ago1:23:07

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1:23:07

On this week's Summer Rewind, the guys revisit the first time they made fun of a Star Trek movie: Star Trek: Insurrection! Why does F. Murray Abraham look like a testicle face? Did we really need this Data bubble butt? And why did Data need to bond with this little kid? PLUS: Quark's adventures in Space Thailand. Star Trek: Insurrection stars P ...…

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