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Wrestling with Social Anxiety as an Adoptee with Tammy Murphy - Ep 146
Manage episode 419245604 series 3283448
Content provided by Beth Syverson. All podcast content including episodes, graphics, and podcast descriptions are uploaded and provided directly by Beth Syverson or their podcast platform partner. If you believe someone is using your copyrighted work without your permission, you can follow the process outlined here https://player.fm/legal.
“I have a hard time believing in love, that love just really exists, that you can love somebody. Then I feel like I have a hard time loving men and stuff, so I wouldn't want them to get hurt if they ever felt like I didn't love them.” - Tammy Murphy
Episode Summary:In this episode of Unraveling Adoption, I had the privilege of speaking with Tammy Murphy, a Black, same-race, domestic adoptee living in Indiana. Tammy shared her struggles with social anxiety and dissociation, stemming from her adoption experience. She recounted how her adoptive mother's inconsistent responses to her questions about being adopted led to confusion and a sense of not belonging. Tammy also shared her journey of self-medication with substances like alcohol and marijuana to cope with her feelings of disconnect and identity crisis.
Despite facing challenges in forming deep relationships and feeling a sense of authenticity, Tammy has taken steps towards healing. She recently started therapy and has begun journaling to identify triggers and coping mechanisms. Tammy expressed her aspirations to become an adoption therapist and to write a memoir titled Two to Forgive, focusing on forgiveness towards her birth mother and adoptive mother.
Throughout the episode, Tammy emphasized the importance of honesty in adoptive families, early communication about adoption, and seeking therapy and self-help resources to navigate the complexities of adoption trauma.
===============
📆 Community Calendar: UnravelingAdoption.com/Calendar
✨Healing the Adoption Constellation database: UnravelingAdoption.com/Healing
💌Sign up for our Unraveling Adoption email list: http://eepurl.com/hVIAVX
===============
RESOURCES:
Resource mentioned in this episode:
- Seven Core Issues in Adoption and Permanency: A Comprehensive Guide to Promoting Understanding and Healing In Adoption, Foster Care, Kinship Families and Third Party Reproduction: https://amzn.to/3QLyqXF
Other Resources:
APtitude Support Group for Adoptive Parents Facing Adoption’s Challenges: UnravelingAdoption.com/APtitude
Other Parents Like Me - oplm.com
Heather Ross - Life Coaching for Parents who have a child struggling with addiction: https://heatherrosscoaching.com/
===============
Unraveling Adoption is produced and hosted by Beth Syverson
Music written and performed by Joseph Nakao
Email questions or comments to Beth@UnravelingAdoption.com
Find us on Facebook, Instagram, and YouTube
Support Unraveling Adoption on Patreon: Patreon.com/UnravelingAdoption
Check out our website: www.UnravelingAdoption.com
Create your own podcast through Libsyn: https://signup.libsyn.com/?promo_code=ADOPTION
===============
TIME STAMPS:
00:05:30 - Connecting with Others as an Adoptee 00:11:01 - Seeking Therapy and Beginning to Address Adoption Trauma 00:14:06 - Future Goals: Becoming an Adoption Therapist 00:15:50 - Advice for Adoptive Parents: Honesty and Openness 00:16:40 - Impact of Lies and Deception on Adoptees 00:18:16 - Advice for Adoptees: Therapy, Emotional Intelligence, and Coping Strategies
185 episodes
ShareManage episode 419245604 series 3283448
Content provided by Beth Syverson. All podcast content including episodes, graphics, and podcast descriptions are uploaded and provided directly by Beth Syverson or their podcast platform partner. If you believe someone is using your copyrighted work without your permission, you can follow the process outlined here https://player.fm/legal.
“I have a hard time believing in love, that love just really exists, that you can love somebody. Then I feel like I have a hard time loving men and stuff, so I wouldn't want them to get hurt if they ever felt like I didn't love them.” - Tammy Murphy
Episode Summary:In this episode of Unraveling Adoption, I had the privilege of speaking with Tammy Murphy, a Black, same-race, domestic adoptee living in Indiana. Tammy shared her struggles with social anxiety and dissociation, stemming from her adoption experience. She recounted how her adoptive mother's inconsistent responses to her questions about being adopted led to confusion and a sense of not belonging. Tammy also shared her journey of self-medication with substances like alcohol and marijuana to cope with her feelings of disconnect and identity crisis.
Despite facing challenges in forming deep relationships and feeling a sense of authenticity, Tammy has taken steps towards healing. She recently started therapy and has begun journaling to identify triggers and coping mechanisms. Tammy expressed her aspirations to become an adoption therapist and to write a memoir titled Two to Forgive, focusing on forgiveness towards her birth mother and adoptive mother.
Throughout the episode, Tammy emphasized the importance of honesty in adoptive families, early communication about adoption, and seeking therapy and self-help resources to navigate the complexities of adoption trauma.
===============
📆 Community Calendar: UnravelingAdoption.com/Calendar
✨Healing the Adoption Constellation database: UnravelingAdoption.com/Healing
💌Sign up for our Unraveling Adoption email list: http://eepurl.com/hVIAVX
===============
RESOURCES:
Resource mentioned in this episode:
- Seven Core Issues in Adoption and Permanency: A Comprehensive Guide to Promoting Understanding and Healing In Adoption, Foster Care, Kinship Families and Third Party Reproduction: https://amzn.to/3QLyqXF
Other Resources:
APtitude Support Group for Adoptive Parents Facing Adoption’s Challenges: UnravelingAdoption.com/APtitude
Other Parents Like Me - oplm.com
Heather Ross - Life Coaching for Parents who have a child struggling with addiction: https://heatherrosscoaching.com/
===============
Unraveling Adoption is produced and hosted by Beth Syverson
Music written and performed by Joseph Nakao
Email questions or comments to Beth@UnravelingAdoption.com
Find us on Facebook, Instagram, and YouTube
Support Unraveling Adoption on Patreon: Patreon.com/UnravelingAdoption
Check out our website: www.UnravelingAdoption.com
Create your own podcast through Libsyn: https://signup.libsyn.com/?promo_code=ADOPTION
===============
TIME STAMPS:
00:05:30 - Connecting with Others as an Adoptee 00:11:01 - Seeking Therapy and Beginning to Address Adoption Trauma 00:14:06 - Future Goals: Becoming an Adoption Therapist 00:15:50 - Advice for Adoptive Parents: Honesty and Openness 00:16:40 - Impact of Lies and Deception on Adoptees 00:18:16 - Advice for Adoptees: Therapy, Emotional Intelligence, and Coping Strategies
185 episodes
All episodes
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1 Building Resilience: DBT Techniques for Overcoming Adoption-Related Challenges with Sharon Stein McNamara - Ep 184 26:58
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Play Later Play Later Lists Like Liked"So the piece that I most resonate with the Dialectical Behavior Therapy is it's one of the therapies that really understands this core feeling of feeling overwhelmed and like you don't want to be alive." - Sharon Stein McNamara EPISODE SUMMARY: In this episode of Unraveling Adoption, I had the pleasure of speaking with Sharon Stein McNamara, a licensed psychologist and adoption-competent therapist. Sharon, an adoptee herself, shared her personal journey and the profound impact of adoption on her life, particularly during her adolescent years when she faced suicidal thoughts after a breakup. We delved into the complexities of adoption and how they can lead to feelings of self-loathing and overwhelming distress, especially among adoptees. Sharon introduced us to Dialectical Behavior Therapy (DBT), a therapeutic approach that has been particularly effective for adopted adolescents and young adults. She explained how DBT incorporates mindfulness and distress tolerance skills, which are crucial for individuals who may feel their emotions are too intense to manage. Throughout our conversation, Sharon emphasized the importance of recognizing and validating these feelings rather than dismissing them. She shared her own experiences with DBT and how it helped her and her clients navigate the challenges of attachment and self-worth. We discussed the significance of shifting core beliefs about oneself, especially for adoptees who may struggle with feelings of being unwanted or unworthy. Sharon's insights provided hope and practical tools for families and individuals impacted by adoption. She encouraged listeners to never give up hope on adoptees, as the right support and understanding can lead to healing and growth. I hope this episode resonates with anyone who has been touched by adoption or is seeking effective therapeutic tools to support themselves or their loved ones. Thank you for joining us, and please share this episode with anyone who might benefit from Sharon's expertise. =============== 📘Get our new book Adoption and Suicidality: amazon.com/Adoption-Suicidality-Healthcare-Professionals-Unraveling/dp/B0DCBCTSLL 📆 Community Calendar: UnravelingAdoption.com/Calendar ✨Healing the Adoption Constellation database: UnravelingAdoption.com/Healing 💌Sign up for our Unraveling Adoption email list: http://eepurl.com/hVIAVX =============== RESOURCES: Sharon’s information: Look up Sharon’s website: Sharonsteinmcnamara.com Other resources mentioned in this episode: Here’s the book Sharon referenced: How to Break Your Addiction to a Person: When--and Why--Love Doesn't Work : https://www.amazon.com/Break-Your-Addiction-Person-When/dp/0553382497 =============== Unraveling Adoption is produced and hosted by Beth Syverson Music written and performed by Joseph Nakao Email questions or comments to Beth@UnravelingAdoption.com Find us on Facebook , Instagram , and YouTube Support Unraveling Adoption on Patreon: http://Patreon.com/UnravelingAdoption Check out our website: http://UnravelingAdoption.com Create your own podcast through Libsyn: https://signup.libsyn.com/?promo_code=ADOPTION =============== Please rate (*****) and/or review Unraveling Adoption in Apple Podcasts and Spotify (even if you listen to it on another app). Your feedback will help more listeners find our episodes. Thank you! =============== TIME STAMPS 00:00:00 - Introduction to Unraveling Adoption 00:01:30 - Guest Introduction: Sharon Stein McNamara 00:02:00 - Sharon's Adoption Story 00:03:40 - Understanding DBT and Its Relevance 00:04:50 - The Importance of Distress Tolerance 00:06:30 - DBT vs. Cognitive Behavioral Therapy 00:08:30 - Grounding Techniques in DBT 00:10:00 - Building Trust with Clients 00:10:30 - Working with Adoptees in Therapy 00:11:00 - Self-Loathing and Adoptee Experiences 00:12:30 - Personal Story: Overcoming Breakup Trauma 00:15:00 - The Impact of Attachment on Relationships 00:17:00 - DBT Skills for Managing Cravings 00:19:00 - The Role of Core Beliefs in Healing 00:21:00 - Finding a DBT-Trained Therapist 00:23:00 - Outcomes of DBT for Adoptees 00:25:00 - Final Thoughts and Resources 00:26:00 - Conclusion and Call to Action…
1 Breathwork and Healing: A Journey Through Adoption Trauma with Kellan Bacon - Ep 183 24:16
24:16 Play Later Play Later Lists Like Liked24:16
Play Later Play Later Lists Like Liked"I was one of these slight skeptics; I was like, well I've been breathing all my life, what can breathwork do for me?" -- Kellan Bacon Hear the transcript of this episode here: https://app.swellai.com/t/tp_01JKBNQJYFFZT18Z0XSMHHTH37 EPISODE SUMMARY: In this episode of Unraveling Adoption, I had the pleasure of speaking with Kellan Bacon, a gender-expansive, transracial adoptee from China, who was adopted as an infant in 1998 and now resides in Cardiff, Wales. Kellan has recently launched a professional practice called Kai Ming Holistics, where they utilize breathwork and other embodied modalities to support others on their healing journeys. Kellan shared their personal adoption story, highlighting the complexities and challenges they faced growing up in a transracial family. They discussed the common narrative of being "saved" through adoption and how they eventually came to realize the profound impact of adoption trauma on their life. This awakening occurred during a mental health crisis around the age of 20, leading Kellan to explore their identity and the interconnectedness of their experiences as an adoptee and a queer individual. We delved into the transformative power of breathwork, a healing modality that Kellan discovered during the COVID-19 pandemic. They explained how breathwork can help individuals access and process trauma stored in the body, particularly for adoptees who may have pre-verbal or pre-cognitive trauma. Kellan emphasized the importance of having a trained guide during breathwork sessions to ensure safety and support. =============== 📘Get our new book Adoption and Suicidality: amazon.com/Adoption-Suicidality-Healthcare-Professionals-Unraveling/dp/B0DCBCTSLL 📆 Community Calendar: UnravelingAdoption.com/Calendar ✨Healing the Adoption Constellation database: UnravelingAdoption.com/Healing 💌Sign up for our Unraveling Adoption email list: http://eepurl.com/hVIAVX =============== RESOURCES: Kellan’s information: Kellan’s Substack: https://kellanbacon.substack.com/ Find Kellan on Instagram both ways at: https://www.instagram.com/kaimingholistics/ AND/OR https://www.instagram.com/kellanbacon/ Find Kellan on Facebook at: https://www.facebook.com/kellan.x.bacon =============== Unraveling Adoption is produced and hosted by Beth Syverson Music written and performed by Joseph Nakao Email questions or comments to Beth@UnravelingAdoption.com Find us on Facebook , Instagram , and YouTube Support Unraveling Adoption on Patreon: http://Patreon.com/UnravelingAdoption Check out our website: http://UnravelingAdoption.com Create your own podcast through Libsyn: https://signup.libsyn.com/?promo_code=ADOPTION =============== Please rate (*****) and/or review Unraveling Adoption in Apple Podcasts and Spotify (even if you listen to it on another app). Your feedback will help more listeners find our episodes. Thank you! =============== TIME STAMPS 00:00:00 - Welcome and Introduction Introduction to the podcast and the host, Beth Syverson, along with her son Joey's journey. 00:01:05 - Meet Kellen Bacon Introduction of guest Kellen Bacon, a transracial adoptee and breathwork practitioner. 00:01:48 - Kellen's Adoption Story Kellen shares their adoption experience and the realization of adoption's impact. 00:03:15 - Coming Out of the Fog Discussion on the awakening to adoption trauma and its effects on mental health. 00:04:30 - Transracial Adoption Experience Kellen discusses growing up as a transracial adoptee and the challenges faced. 00:06:04 - Exploring Gender Identity Kellen talks about their journey of coming to terms with their gender identity. 00:07:01 - The Intersection of Identities Discussion on how various aspects of identity intertwine and impact personal growth. 00:08:34 - COVID and Breathwork Kellen shares how COVID led them to discover breathwork as a healing modality. 00:10:01 - Understanding Breathwork Explanation of breathwork and its unique approach to healing trauma. 00:11:08 - Demonstration of Breathwork Kellen provides a brief demonstration of breathwork techniques. 00:12:24 - Safety in Breathwork Discussion on the importance of having a guide during breathwork sessions. 00:15:09 - Breathwork for Adoptees Exploration of how breathwork can specifically benefit adoptees dealing with trauma. 00:16:39 - Trauma in the Body Kellen explains how trauma is stored in the body and the importance of somatic healing. 00:19:30 - Kellen's Offerings Information on Kellen's practice, including support groups for trans-adoptees. 00:20:20 - Root Cause Healing Introduction to root cause therapy and its significance in addressing limiting beliefs. 00:22:26 - Kellen's Journey and Age Discussion on Kellen's age and their deep work in healing and therapy. 00:23:30 - Closing Thoughts Final remarks on the importance of breathwork and resources for adoptees.…
1 Responding to the Siren Call: Navigating Birth Family Connections with Susan Kiyo Ito - Ep 182 31:25
31:25 Play Later Play Later Lists Like Liked31:25
Play Later Play Later Lists Like Liked"I think she had a deep ambivalence about me, knowing me, having a relationship with me from the very beginning." -- Susan Kiyo Ito Read the transcript of this episode here: https://app.swellai.com/t/tp_01JJYRPQ0EJEGKW4GNXFMCA8CV EPISODE SUMMARY: In this episode of Unraveling Adoption, I had the pleasure of speaking with Susan Kiyo Ito, a writing professor and author of the memoir I Would Meet You Anywhere. Susan's book, a culmination of 30 years of work, explores her journey as a biracial adoptee—half Japanese and half white—who was adopted at three and a half months old by Japanese American parents. We delved into Susan's origin story, her relationship with her adoptive parents, and her deep desire to connect with her birth mother, Yumi. Susan described Yumi as a charismatic yet ambivalent figure, reflecting on the complexities of their relationship and the cultural stigma surrounding adoption in Japanese society. Throughout our conversation, we discussed the emotional weight of adoption, the challenges of identity, and the universal longing for connection that many adoptees experience. Susan shared how writing her memoir was a healing process, allowing her to articulate her experiences and put down the burdens she had carried for so long. We also touched on the misconceptions surrounding adoption, particularly the notion of "luck," and how important it is for adoptive parents to support their children in their search for identity and connection without imposing their own feelings onto them. As we wrapped up, Susan encouraged listeners to embrace their stories and consider the power of sharing their experiences. Her insights and reflections provide a valuable perspective on the complexities of adoption, making this episode a must-listen for anyone impacted by adoption or interested in understanding its nuances. =============== 📘Get our new book Adoption and Suicidality: amazon.com/Adoption-Suicidality-Healthcare-Professionals-Unraveling/dp/B0DCBCTSLL 📆 Community Calendar: UnravelingAdoption.com/Calendar ✨Healing the Adoption Constellation database: UnravelingAdoption.com/Healing 💌Sign up for our Unraveling Adoption email list: http://eepurl.com/hVIAVX =============== RESOURCES: Susan’s information: Explore Susan’s website and purchase her memoir: https://www.thesusanito.com/ Find her on Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/susan.ito Find her on Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/thesusanito/ =============== Unraveling Adoption is produced and hosted by Beth Syverson Music written and performed by Joseph Nakao Email questions or comments to Beth@UnravelingAdoption.com Find us on Facebook , Instagram , and YouTube Support Unraveling Adoption on Patreon: http://Patreon.com/UnravelingAdoption Check out our website: http://UnravelingAdoption.com Create your own podcast through Libsyn: https://signup.libsyn.com/?promo_code=ADOPTION =============== Please rate (*****) and/or review Unraveling Adoption in Apple Podcasts and Spotify (even if you listen to it on another app). Your feedback will help more listeners find our episodes. Thank you! =============== TIME STAMPS: 00:00:12 - Meet the Host and Guest 00:00:44 - Susan Kiyo Ito's Memoir Journey 00:01:27 - Personal Connections and Background 00:02:38 - Susan's Adoption Story 00:04:37 - Cultural Heritage and Upbringing 00:05:37 - Describing Yumi: The Birth Mother 00:06:48 - Cultural Stigma and Secrets 00:07:02 - The Significance of the Title 00:09:46 - Personal Growth and Boundaries 00:10:44 - Emotional Release After Publishing 00:11:28 - The Weight of Connection 00:12:45 - The Complexity of Relationships 00:14:25 - Validation from Other Adoptees 00:15:10 - Sensory Details in Writing 00:16:37 - The Role of Journaling 00:18:19 - Exploring Alternative Life Paths 00:20:54 - Reflections on Luck in Adoption 00:22:54 - Advice for Adoptive Parents 00:25:45 - Support and Understanding 00:26:29 - The Sound of Names 00:27:28 - Connecting with the Author 00:29:33 - Closing Thoughts and Future Works…
1 The Rebellious Adoptee: Finding Healing and Community After a Traumatic Childhood with Dave Sanchez-Brown - Ep 181 36:48
36:48 Play Later Play Later Lists Like Liked36:48
Play Later Play Later Lists Like Liked"The most healing thing for me now has been the support of other adoptees." -- Dave Sanchez-Brown Read the transcript of this episode here: https://app.swellai.com/t/tp_01JJD8EF1R7VJ6J0V5GXRWXJY4 =============== EPISODE SUMMARY: In this episode of Unraveling Adoption, I had the privilege of speaking with Dave Sanchez-Brown, an adoptee who has bravely navigated the complexities of adoption, mental health struggles, and addiction. Dave shared his adoption story, which took a significant turn after he read Dani Shapiro's memoir Inheritance. Inspired, he decided to take a DNA test, leading him to uncover his biological family and the trauma associated with his past. He discussed the overwhelming emotions that surfaced as he connected with his roots, including the discovery of a family history marked by addiction. Throughout our conversation, Dave highlighted the importance of community and peer support in his recovery journey. He emphasized that finding others who share similar experiences has been more therapeutic than traditional therapy. We also touched on the stigma surrounding addiction and mental health, and how society often lacks empathy for those struggling. As we wrapped up, Dave offered valuable advice for adoptive parents, urging them to be aware of their children's emotional needs and the potential for feelings of alienation. He encouraged parents to seek their own healing to better support their kids. This episode is a powerful reminder of the resilience of the human spirit and the importance of connection in healing. I hope Dave's story inspires listeners to seek support and understanding, whether they are adoptees, adoptive parents, or anyone affected by mental health challenges. Thank you for joining us, and remember to stay safe and connected. =============== 📘Get our new book Adoption and Suicidality: amazon.com/Adoption-Suicidality-Healthcare-Professionals-Unraveling/dp/B0DCBCTSLL 📆 Community Calendar: UnravelingAdoption.com/Calendar ✨Healing the Adoption Constellation database: UnravelingAdoption.com/Healing 💌Sign up for our Unraveling Adoption email list: http://eepurl.com/hVIAVX =============== RESOURCES: Dave’s information: Follow Dave as The Rebellious Adoptee on Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/therebelliousadoptee And find him as The Rebellious Adoptee on Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/therebelliousadoptee/ Other resources mentioned in this episode: Dani Shapiro’s memoir Inheritance: https://www.amazon.com/Inheritance-Memoir-Genealogy-Paternity-Love/dp/0525434038 DNA Detectives Facebook Group: https://www.facebook.com/groups/DNADetectives/ Search Angels: https://www.searchangels.org =============== Unraveling Adoption is produced and hosted by Beth Syverson Music written and performed by Joseph Nakao Email questions or comments to Beth@UnravelingAdoption.com Find us on Facebook , Instagram , and YouTube Support Unraveling Adoption on Patreon: http://Patreon.com/UnravelingAdoption Check out our website: http://UnravelingAdoption.com Create your own podcast through Libsyn: https://signup.libsyn.com/?promo_code=ADOPTION =============== Please rate (*****) and/or review Unraveling Adoption in Apple Podcasts and Spotify (even if you listen to it on another app). Your feedback will help more listeners find our episodes. Thank you! =============== TIME STAMPS 00:00:00 - Introduction to Adoption Healing Quest 00:02:00 - Introducing Dave Sanchez-Brown 00:02:21 - Dave's Adoption Story Begins 00:03:36 - The Impact of DNA Testing 00:04:21 - Finding Biological Family 00:05:59 - Discovering Family History and Addiction 00:07:28 - Understanding Genetic Influences 00:08:09 - Adoptive Family Dynamics 00:09:00 - Childhood Trauma and Coping Mechanisms 00:10:54 - First Suicide Attempt and Hospitalization 00:12:22 - Parental Reactions to Suicidal Behavior 00:13:27 - Surviving Through Activities and Friendships 00:14:50 - Moving to San Francisco and Coming Out 00:16:09 - The AIDS Crisis and Its Impact 00:18:25 - Struggles with Addiction Post-Partner's Death 00:20:01 - Creating a Fictitious Family 00:21:11 - Revisiting Addiction and Recovery 00:22:35 - Turning Point: Moving to New York 00:23:29 - Support from Other Adoptees 00:24:10 - Coming Out of the Adoption Fog 00:25:03 - Intergenerational Trauma and Its Effects 00:26:43 - Reclaiming Identity as the Rebellious Adoptee 00:27:20 - Navigating the Complexities of Adoption 00:29:20 - Advice for Adoptive Parents 00:32:05 - The Importance of Empathy and Support 00:33:35 - Connecting with the Community 00:34:42 - Final Thoughts, Encouragement, and Resources…
1 Adoption in India: Insights from an Adoptee Therapist with Dr. Asra Ali - Ep 180 26:27
26:27 Play Later Play Later Lists Like Liked26:27
Play Later Play Later Lists Like Liked"It's a deep rooted fear of every adoptive parent that the parent will get rejected." - Dr. Asra Ali Read the transcript of this episode here: https://app.swellai.com/t/tp_01JHS4S4K9DW0G3AZRZKWG970A =============== Join Unraveling Adoption's in-person Adoption Healing Quest in Seal Beach, CA on February 8, 2025. More info and registration here: https://www.eventbrite.com/e/adoption-healing-quest-an-interactive-event-for-the-adoption-community-tickets-1095804814699?aff=oddtdtcreator =============== EPISODE SUMMARY: In this episode of Unraveling Adoption, I had the pleasure of speaking with Dr. Asra Ali, an adoptee from India whose adoption was facilitated by Mother Teresa. Dr. Asra shared her unique adoption story, highlighting the positive experiences she had growing up in a loving family that embraced her identity as an adopted child from a young age. We delved into the cultural narratives surrounding adoption in India, discussing the historical preference for male children and the significant shifts that have occurred over the years. Dr. Asra explained how adoption practices have evolved, moving from informal arrangements to more structured legal processes to combat issues like human trafficking. As a psychologist and child and family therapist, Dr. Asra works with adoptive families in India, helping them navigate the complexities of adoption. She emphasized the importance of honesty and emotional support for adopted children, noting that many adoptive parents struggle with insecurity and often keep the child's adoption a secret. This can lead to emotional disconnects and challenges for the child. Throughout our conversation, Dr. Asra provided valuable insights into the common mistakes adoptive parents make and the need for open communication about adoption. She also shared her mixed feelings about her own adoption, reflecting on the unanswered questions regarding her biological family. Listeners will find this episode enlightening as we explore the intricacies of adoption in India and the universal themes that resonate with adoptive families worldwide. Dr. Asra's work is a testament to the importance of understanding and supporting adopted children, and I encourage anyone interested in this topic to reach out to her for guidance. =============== 📘Get our new book Adoption and Suicidality: amazon.com/Adoption-Suicidality-Healthcare-Professionals-Unraveling/dp/B0DCBCTSLL 📆 Community Calendar: UnravelingAdoption.com/Calendar ✨Healing the Adoption Constellation database: UnravelingAdoption.com/Healing 💌Sign up for our Unraveling Adoption email list: http://eepurl.com/hVIAVX =============== RESOURCES: Dr. Asra’s information: Find Dr. Asra on Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/dr.asraali25/ Call Dr. Asra on Mobile/Whatsapp: 9742163606 (India) Email Dr. Asra: asraali1989@gmail.com P eople throughout the world can reach out to Dr. Asra for various counselling therapy sessions Depression Adoption Emotional distress Low self esteem Public speaking issues/ Social issues Parenting and its types How to handle teenages Impact of Covid on my child's mental health, emotional, social and cognitive decline Grief counselling Loss of a dear one OR pet counselling Early childhood years challenges Handling children with emotional distress Importance of nutrition Mind and body healing Astro travel journey Healing the child in you Impact of food on my body Positive attitude towards self and other Working on negative emotions and energy Communication and its importance for my healing Price for 1-hour session: US$: 80 dollars Canada: 90 USD/CAD UAE: 1000 AED India: 2000 inr Other resources mentioned in this episode: The other Indian adoptee guest on our podcast: “Pride and Resilience: A Transgender Adoptee's Path” with Sanjay Pulver: https://directory.libsyn.com/episode/index/id/31826567 =============== Unraveling Adoption is produced and hosted by Beth Syverson Music written and performed by Joseph Nakao Email questions or comments to Beth@UnravelingAdoption.com Find us on Facebook , Instagram , and YouTube Support Unraveling Adoption on Patreon: http://Patreon.com/UnravelingAdoption Check out our website: http://UnravelingAdoption.com Create your own podcast through Libsyn: https://signup.libsyn.com/?promo_code=ADOPTION =============== Please rate (*****) and/or review Unraveling Adoption in Apple Podcasts and Spotify (even if you listen to it on another app). Your feedback will help more listeners find our episodes. Thank you! =============== TIME STAMPS: 00:00:00 - Introduction 00:01:00 - Meet Dr. Asra AliIntroduction of Dr. Asra Ali, an adoptee from India, and her unique adoption story facilitated by Mother Teresa. 00:03:00 - Cultural Perspectives on Adoption in India Discussion on the cultural status of adoption in India, including gender preferences and historical practices. 00:06:00 - Domestic vs. International Adoption Insights into the prevalence of domestic adoption in India compared to international adoption and the challenges involved. 00:10:00 - Common Mistakes by Adoptive Parents Dr. Asra discusses the importance of honesty and the emotional disconnect often seen in adoptive families. 00:15:00 - Reflections on Identity and Biological Roots Exploration of Dr. Asra's feelings about her adoption, her desire to learn about her biological parents, and the concept of twinship among adoptees. 00:20:00 - Advice for Adoptive Parents Dr. Asra offers guidance on how adoptive parents can better support their children and the importance of personal growth. 00:24:00 - Closing Remarks and Resources Beth shares information about upcoming events related to adoption healing and how to connect with Dr. Asra.…
1 From Secrets to Self-Discovery: A Late Discovery Adoptee’s Story with Brad Ewell - Ep 179 34:05
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Play Later Play Later Lists Like Liked"I was able to kind of reinvent myself into who I probably would have been at some level had I not been adopted." -- Brad Ewell Read the transcript: https://app.swellai.com/t/tp_01JGAR0QVDBKHQG88R7JAJ292Z EPISODE SUMMARY: In this episode of Unraveling Adoption, I had the honor of speaking with Brad Ewell, a late discovery adoptee (LDA) who learned about his adoption at the age of 48. Brad shared his shocking journey of self-discovery after taking an ancestry DNA test, which revealed a truth that had been hidden from him for nearly five decades. He discussed the confusion and betrayal he felt upon learning that everyone around him had known he was adopted, while he had no idea. Brad reflected on his upbringing, his struggles with identity, and how he tried to fit into a life that never felt quite right. Our conversation also explored Brad's reconnection with his biological family, including his birth father, who had been incarcerated for decades. This relationship has provided him with unexpected closure and understanding. Brad emphasized the importance of community and therapy for those navigating similar experiences, highlighting the need for openness in adoption. His story serves as a powerful reminder of the significance of truth and the healing that can come from embracing one's identity. =============== Join our in-person Adoption Healing Quest in Seal Beach, CA on February 8, 2025. More info and registration here: https://www.eventbrite.com/e/adoption-healing-quest-an-interactive-event-for-the-adoption-community-tickets-1095804814699?aff=oddtdtcreator RESOURCES: Brad’s information: Here are all of Brad’s blog posts and links: https://linktr.ee/LDA_BRAD?utm_source=linktree_profile_share<sid=1bf18b6f-2423-47a2-b68d-431ac6c7bc13 Right to Know organization: https://righttoknow.us/ Find Brad's adoption account on Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/a_late_discovery/ Find Brad’s art on Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/cut_and_shoot_art?igshid=OGQ5ZDc2ODk2ZA%3D%3D Other resources mentioned in this episode: Fred Nicora’s another LDA that Brad mentions. He was an Unraveling Adoption episode guest too: https://directory.libsyn.com/episode/index/id/26549451 =============== 📘Get our new book Adoption and Suicidality: amazon.com/Adoption-Suicidality-Healthcare-Professionals-Unraveling/dp/B0DCBCTSLL 📆 Community Calendar: UnravelingAdoption.com/Calendar ✨Healing the Adoption Constellation database: UnravelingAdoption.com/Healing 💌Sign up for our Unraveling Adoption email list: http://eepurl.com/hVIAVX =============== Unraveling Adoption is produced and hosted by Beth Syverson Music written and performed by Joseph Nakao Email questions or comments to Beth@UnravelingAdoption.com Find us on Facebook , Instagram , and YouTube Support Unraveling Adoption on Patreon: http://Patreon.com/UnravelingAdoption Check out our website: http://UnravelingAdoption.com Create your own podcast through Libsyn: https://signup.libsyn.com/?promo_code=ADOPTION =============== TIME STAMPS: 00:00:44 - The Importance of Truth in Adoption Discussion on the necessity of telling adoptees their truth from a young age. 00:01:05 - Meet Brad Ewell: A Late Discovery Adoptee Introduction of guest Brad Ewell and his experience as a late discovery adoptee. 00:01:46 - Did You Have an Inkling? Brad shares his experience of not having any idea he was adopted. 00:04:50 - The Ancestry DNA Test Revelation Brad recounts how he discovered he was adopted through an ancestry DNA test. 00:10:29 - The Moment of Truth Brad describes the emotional moment he learned he was adopted. 00:12:02 - Connecting with His Birth Father Brad shares the process of finding and communicating with his birth father. 00:17:09 - Building a Relationship Brad discusses the development of his relationship with his birth father. 00:20:33 - Reconstructing Identity Brad reflects on how he has been able to reinvent himself post-discovery. 00:24:44 - Advice for Adoptive Parents Brad offers insights for adoptive parents on the importance of honesty with their children. 00:27:53 - Navigating Loss and Grief Brad discusses the passing of his adoptive parents and its impact on his journey. 00:30:15 - Community Support in Adoption The importance of finding community and support among those with similar experiences.…
1 REPLAY Behind the Scenes of Because She's Adopted: A Filmmaker's Journey with Kristal Parke - Ep 178 30:50
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Play Later Play Later Lists Like Liked"I truly felt the weight of the world telling the story. I felt like it was a great responsibility, but I had to do it." -- Kristal Parke Read the Transcript here: https://app.swellai.com/t/tp_01JG7AR0SN4Y6M7WW6E7WEK0AT EPISODE SUMMARY: In this episode of Unraveling Adoption, I had the pleasure of speaking with Kristal Parke, a talented filmmaker and adoptee, about her acclaimed documentary, Because She's Adopted. As we kick off 2025, we are excited to offer a replay of our conversation, which dives deep into the complexities of adoption and the personal journey Kristal undertook while creating her film. Kristal shares her experiences growing up as a Canadian adoptee, her reunion with her birth mother, and her struggles with addiction and identity. We discuss the unique aspects of her story, including the impact of her Indigenous heritage and the challenges she faced in reconnecting with that part of herself. Kristal's film has resonated with many, winning awards and touching the hearts of viewers, including her own family and film crew. Throughout our conversation, we explore the emotional weight of telling one's story and the healing that comes from vulnerability. Kristal's journey not only highlights the importance of understanding adoption from multiple perspectives but also emphasizes the ongoing impact it has on families and future generations. Join us for a screening of Because She's Adopted on January 11th, 2025, where you can engage with Kristal and ask questions about her powerful work. This episode is a heartfelt reminder of the complexities of adoption and the importance of sharing our stories. Thank you for listening, and I hope you enjoy this insightful conversation with Kristal Parke. Join Kristal for an online screening of Because She’s Adopted on January 11, 2025, at 4pm PST / 7pm EST, including a Q&A with Kristal afterwards. More information and tickets are here: https://www.eventbrite.com/e/online-screening-of-kristal-parkes-documentary-because-shes-adopted-wqa-tickets-1097838266809?aff=oddtdtcreator =============== 📘Get our new book Adoption and Suicidality: amazon.com/Adoption-Suicidality-Healthcare-Professionals-Unraveling/dp/B0DCBCTSLL 📆 Community Calendar: UnravelingAdoption.com/Calendar ✨Healing the Adoption Constellation database: UnravelingAdoption.com/Healing 💌Sign up for our Unraveling Adoption email list: http://eepurl.com/hVIAVX =============== RESOURCES: Kristal’s information: Check our Kristal’s film’s website to keep informed of future events: KristalParke.net Follow the film at Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/profile.php?id=61551013663413 Or on Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/becauseshesadopted/ Email Kristal at Kristal@BecauseShesAdopted.com Watch a trailer of the film Because She’s Adopted: https://youtu.be/uCnQPDnxgA0?si=VY6e4ZvgfbyTHzXF =============== Unraveling Adoption is produced and hosted by Beth Syverson Music written and performed by Joseph Nakao Email questions or comments to Beth@UnravelingAdoption.com Find us on Facebook , Instagram , and YouTube Support Unraveling Adoption on Patreon: Patreon.com/UnravelingAdoption Check out our website: www.UnravelingAdoption.com Create your own podcast through Libsyn: https://signup.libsyn.com/?promo_code=ADOPTION =============== Timestamps: 00:00:00 - Welcome to Unraveling Adoption Introduction to the podcast and host Beth Syverson. 00:01:15 - Introducing Krystal Parke Overview of Krystal Park and her film "Because She's Adopted." 00:02:24 - The Impact of the Film Krystal shares her hopes for the film and its emotional impact. 00:04:33 - Support from Adoptive Parents Discussion on her adoptive parents' reactions to the film. 00:05:06 - Reunion with Birth Family Krystal talks about her reunion with her birth mother. 00:06:58 - Exploring Identity and Gender The complexities of identity and gender expectations in adoption. 00:08:19 - Indigenous Heritage Krystal discusses her Indigenous roots and reconnection challenges. 00:10:29 - Journey to Manitoba Details about her significant trip to Manitoba. 00:11:26 - Understanding Residential Schools Explanation of the impact of residential schools on Indigenous peoples. 00:13:09 - The Sixties Scoop Discussion on the Sixties Scoop and its effects on her birth mother. 00:14:58 - Reunion Reflections Reflections on the emotional complexities of her reunion. 00:16:09 - Family Support in Filmmaking Importance of family support during the filmmaking process. 00:18:44 - Brothers' Perspectives Insights from her brothers about adoption and family dynamics. 00:19:51 - The Role of Humor in the Film How humor was used to balance the film's heavy themes. 00:20:45 - Children's Reactions Her children's understanding and support for the film. 00:21:51 - Cultural Connections Significance of cultural identity for her children. 00:23:44 - Filming Experience Memorable moments and dynamics of the filming process. 00:26:02 - Personal Growth Through Filmmaking Krystal reflects on her growth and understanding of her story. 00:27:43 - Future Aspirations Discussion on potential future projects and self-discovery. 00:29:34 - Closing Remarks Beth wraps up the episode and encourages listener engagement.…
1 From Control to Acceptance: Parenting Through Grief with Jessica Fein - Ep 177 41:22
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Play Later Play Later Lists Like Liked"We followed her lead. And so there was a lot of laughter and there was a lot of beauty." -- Jessica Fein Read the episode transcript here: https://app.swellai.com/t/tp_01JG2GNT8VS6BJTW0VGKSK3 PVA EPISODE SUMMARY: In this episode of Unraveling Adoption, I had the privilege of speaking with Jessica Fein, an adoptive mother and author of the memoir Breath Taking: A Memoir of Family, Dreams, and Broken Genes . Jessica shares her family's deeply moving and complex journey through adoption and the heartbreaking experience of losing her middle child, Dalia, to a rare genetic disorder. We began by discussing Jessica's family's path to adoption, which was initially rooted in a long struggle with infertility. After years of trying to conceive, Jessica and her husband decided to pursue adoption, ultimately leading them to adopt three children from Guatemala. Jessica eloquently describes the joy and chaos of raising her children, but also the challenges they faced when they began to notice developmental issues with Dalia. As Dalia's health declined due to a rare mitochondrial disease, Jessica opened up about the emotional and practical challenges of caring for a child with a degenerative condition. She shared the struggles of navigating the medical system, the frustration of being more knowledgeable about Dalia's condition than some healthcare providers, and the profound love that persisted throughout their journey. Throughout our conversation, Jessica emphasized the importance of finding joy amidst the sorrow and the lessons she learned about control and certainty in parenting. She highlighted that while we cannot control the outcomes of our children's lives, we can choose how we respond to the challenges we face. Jessica's story is a testament to resilience, love, and the complexities of adoption. I encourage listeners to check out her memoir, Breath Taking , and her podcast, I Don't Know How You Do It , where she continues to share stories of families navigating unimaginable circumstances. Thank you for joining us in this heartfelt discussion, and I hope it resonates with anyone touched by adoption or facing similar challenges. =============== 📘Get our new book Adoption and Suicidality: amazon.com/Adoption-Suicidality-Healthcare-Professionals-Unraveling/dp/B0DCBCTSLL 📆 Community Calendar: UnravelingAdoption.com/Calendar ✨Healing the Adoption Constellation database: UnravelingAdoption.com/Healing 💌Sign up for our Unraveling Adoption email list: http://eepurl.com/hVIAVX =============== RESOURCES: Jessica’s information: Browse Jessica’s website, including her book, podcast, and essays: https://www.jessicafeinstories.com/ Find Jessica on Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/feinjessica/ I Don’t Know How You Do It podcast: https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/i-dont-know-how-you-do-it/id1668168226 =============== Unraveling Adoption is produced and hosted by Beth Syverson Music written and performed by Joseph Nakao Email questions or comments to Beth@UnravelingAdoption.com Find us on Facebook , Instagram , and YouTube Support Unraveling Adoption on Patreon: http://Patreon.com/UnravelingAdoption Check out our website: http://UnravelingAdoption.com Create your own podcast through Libsyn: https://signup.libsyn.com/?promo_code=ADOPTION =============== Please rate (*****) and/or review Unraveling Adoption in Apple Podcasts and Spotify (even if you listen to it on another app). Your feedback will help more listeners find our episodes. Thank you! =============== TIME STAMPS: 00:00:00 - Introduction Welcome to Unraveling Adoption with host Beth Syverson and guest Jessica Fein. 00:01:03 - Acknowledging Loss Beth expresses condolences for Dalia's death and the complexities of Jessica's story. 00:01:55 - Adoption Journey Begins Jessica shares her family's journey through infertility and the decision to adopt. 00:05:53 - Choosing International Adoption Discussion on selecting Guatemala for international adoption. 00:08:41 - Bringing Home Their First Child The experience of bringing their first child home after a long wait. 00:09:41 - Expanding the Family The couple's journey to adopt three children and their early family life. 00:10:52 - Concerns About Dalia's Development Early concerns about Dalia's development and responses from early intervention. 00:12:06 - Hearing Loss Diagnosis Dalia is diagnosed with hearing loss, raising further health questions. 00:13:08 - Rare Genetic Disorder Jessica explains Dalia's rare mitochondrial disease diagnosis and its uncertainties. 00:14:08 - Navigating Medical Challenges The family's experience with medical professionals and understanding Dalia's condition. 00:16:41 - Dalia's Hospitalization The escalation of Dalia's condition leading to a lengthy hospital stay. 00:18:30 - Life with a Tracheostomy Impact of Dalia's tracheostomy on her communication and eating. 00:19:13 - Communication Challenges How Dalia communicated with her family after her condition worsened. 00:20:34 - Importance of Connection Maintaining connection and communication with Dalia despite limitations. 00:21:02 - Finding Joy Amidst Struggles Balancing joy and sorrow in family life during challenging times. 00:22:06 - Self-Care Strategies Practical self-care strategies for caregivers. 00:23:33 - Dalia's School Experience Dalia's participation in school despite her condition. 00:25:14 - Understanding Awareness Exploring Dalia's awareness of her condition and family efforts. 00:26:32 - Lessons on Control Jessica reflects on lessons learned about control and certainty. 00:28:22 - Role of Writing The therapeutic role of writing in processing experiences. 00:30:22 - Advice for Adoptive Parents Jessica offers insights for prospective adoptive parents. 00:35:09 - Unpredictability of Parenthood Discussion on the unpredictability of parenting, biological or adoptive. 00:38:06 - Conclusion and Resources Wrap-up of the conversation and sharing resources for listeners.…
1 Unraveling the Layers of Childhood Trauma with Ron Jenkins - Ep 176 43:38
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Play Later Play Later Lists Like Liked"I didn't realize how strong I was until, you know, I got into therapy and started to understand all the things that I've overcome." - Ron Jenkins Read the transcript of this episode here: https://app.swellai.com/t/tp_01JFJJKB7XP00HAV5P6H6ETQGJ EPISODE SUMMARY: In this episode of Unraveling Adoption, I had the privilege of speaking with Ron Jenkins, a remarkable individual whose journey through the complexities of foster care and adoption is both harrowing and inspiring. Ron's story begins with the tragic loss of his mother as a young child, leading him and his siblings into the foster care system. He was eventually adopted by a woman who, rather than providing a safe haven, exploited the system for drug money, resulting in a chaotic and violent environment. Ron candidly shares the trauma he experienced, including the loss of several brothers to violence and the pervasive fear that defined his childhood. Despite these challenges, he made a conscious decision to steer clear of gangs and drugs, ultimately finding a mentor who changed the trajectory of his life. This mentor not only provided guidance but also became a father figure, helping Ron navigate his way to a football scholarship at Fresno State University. Throughout our conversation, Ron emphasizes the importance of self-advocacy, therapy, and the need to break the cycle of trauma. He encourages listeners, especially men, to seek help and recognize that they deserve the same opportunities as anyone else. Ron's journey of healing and his commitment to helping at-risk youth through mentorship and advocacy work is truly inspiring. We also touched on the impact of sexual abuse in Ron's life and how it shaped his relationships. He highlights the importance of addressing these issues through therapy, which has been instrumental in his healing process. As we wrapped up, Ron shared exciting news about a movie being made about his life, and he invited anyone interested in supporting this project to reach out. This episode is a powerful reminder of resilience, the importance of community, and the potential for transformation, even in the face of overwhelming adversity. I hope Ron's story resonates with you and inspires you to seek help, advocate for yourself, and support others in their journeys. =============== 📘Get our new book Adoption and Suicidality: amazon.com/Adoption-Suicidality-Healthcare-Professionals-Unraveling/dp/B0DCBCTSLL 📆 Community Calendar: UnravelingAdoption.com/Calendar ✨Healing the Adoption Constellation database: UnravelingAdoption.com/Healing 💌Sign up for our Unraveling Adoption email list: http://eepurl.com/hVIAVX =============== RESOURCES: Ron’s information: Ron’s email: rongolf6807@gmail.com Documentary coming 2025-2026 - email Ron to find out how best to support that project Other resources mentioned in this episode: Celia Center, led by Jeanette Yoffe: https://celiacenter.org/ Runaway Girl: Escaping Life on the Streets by Carissa Phelps: https://www.amazon.com/Runaway-Girl-Escaping-Life-Streets/dp/0143123335 Carissa’s nonprofit organization’s website: https://runawaygirl.com/ =============== Unraveling Adoption is produced and hosted by Beth Syverson Music written and performed by Joseph Nakao Email questions or comments to Beth@UnravelingAdoption.com Find us on Facebook , Instagram , and YouTube Support Unraveling Adoption on Patreon: http://Patreon.com/UnravelingAdoption Check out our website: http://UnravelingAdoption.com Create your own podcast through Libsyn: https://signup.libsyn.com/?promo_code=ADOPTION =============== Please rate (*****) and/or review Unraveling Adoption in Apple Podcasts and Spotify (even if you listen to it on another app). Your feedback will help more listeners find our episodes. Thank you! =============== TIME STAMPS: 00:00:00 - Introduction Welcome to Unraveling Adoption with host Beth Syverson and guest Ron Jenkins. 00:01:43 - Ron’s Adoption Story Ron shares his early experiences in foster care and adoption. 00:02:21 - Foster Care Challenges Discussion of difficulties faced due to his adoptive mother's drug use. 00:03:57 - Violence and Trauma Recounting violent incidents and trauma in his childhood. 00:06:36 - Avoiding Gangs Ron discusses his choices to stay away from gang involvement. 00:10:07 - Loss of a Brother Heartbreaking story of his brother's murder and its impact. 00:12:39 - Self-Advocacy Ron reflects on learning to advocate for himself. 00:14:23 - Mentorship Introduction of Mr. Burnett, a key mentor in Ron's life. 00:16:30 - Impact of Sports How sports provided structure and discipline. 00:20:08 - Helping Youth Ron talks about his work with at-risk youth. 00:22:43 - Trust and Self-Advocacy The importance of learning to trust and advocate for oneself. 00:25:04 - Value of Therapy Emphasizing therapy's role in healing from trauma. 00:28:05 - Sexual Abuse Experiences Ron shares his experiences with sexual abuse. 00:33:16 - Relationship Patterns How past abuse influenced his adult relationships. 00:36:10 - Breaking the Cycle The importance of addressing abusive patterns. 00:38:49 - Healing and Strength Reflections on healing through faith and therapy. 00:39:39 - Book Recommendation Ron recommends "Runaway Girl" for inspiration. 00:40:52 - Movie Project News about a movie being made about Ron's life. 00:42:17 - Closing Remarks Beth thanks Ron and encourages listeners to connect with resources.…
1 Abortion and Adoption: Insights from Sociological Research with Gretchen Sisson - Ep 175 33:37
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Play Later Play Later Lists Like Liked"I use the language of supply and demand because this is a market-based system and it's uncomfortable for a lot of people, right? Because you're talking about a supply and demand of human beings." -- Gretchen Sisson Read the transcript here: https://app.swellai.com/t/tp_01JESZ6VPKJMRTMRHX6ZMBHDB7 EPISODE SUMMARY: In this episode of Unraveling Adoption, I had the pleasure of speaking with Gretchen Sisson, the author of the acclaimed book Relinquished: The Politics of Adoption and the Privilege of American Motherhood. Gretchen's work stems from a decade-long qualitative sociological study that delves into the experiences of relinquishing mothers and critiques the American adoption system. We discussed her journey into this research, which began while she was working with pregnant and parenting young people in Boston. Gretchen highlighted the stigmatization of young motherhood and the disconnect between societal narratives and the lived experiences of these women. Her research emphasizes the complexities of adoption, particularly how it intersects with issues of reproductive health and justice. Gretchen shared insights from her book, revealing that the majority of women who are denied access to abortion end up parenting their children, with only a small percentage choosing adoption. This led to a discussion about the implications of the recent Dobbs decision and its potential impact on adoption rates, as well as the troubling commodification of children within the adoption system. Throughout our conversation, we explored the reactions to her book from both the adoption community and the broader public. While many adoptees have resonated with her work, some adoptive parents have expressed defensiveness. We emphasized the importance of listening to adoptees and understanding the systemic issues surrounding adoption. Gretchen also touched on the need for better support systems for both adoptive parents and adoptees, advocating for a more nuanced understanding of family structures and the complexities of parenting. We concluded with a call to action for listeners to engage with the voices of adoptees and to consider the broader implications of adoption in our society. I encourage everyone to check out Gretchen's book, available in various formats, and to connect with her on social media. Thank you for joining us in this important conversation about adoption and its many layers. =============== 📘Get our new book Adoption and Suicidality: amazon.com/Adoption-Suicidality-Healthcare-Professionals-Unraveling/dp/B0DCBCTSLL 📆 Community Calendar: UnravelingAdoption.com/Calendar ✨Healing the Adoption Constellation database: UnravelingAdoption.com/Healing 💌Sign up for our Unraveling Adoption email list: http://eepurl.com/hVIAVX =============== RESOURCES: Gretchen’s information: Pick up Gretchen’s amazing book Relinquished : https://www.amazon.com/Relinquished-Politics-Adoption-Privilege-Motherhood/dp/1250286778 Find Gretchen on Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/gretchen.sisson/ Other book mentioned in this episode: The Primal Wound by Nancy Verrier: https://www.amazon.com/Primal-Wound-Understanding-Adopted-Child/dp/0963648004 =============== Unraveling Adoption is produced and hosted by Beth Syverson Music written and performed by Joseph Nakao Email questions or comments to Beth@UnravelingAdoption.com Find us on Facebook , Instagram , and YouTube Support Unraveling Adoption on Patreon: http://Patreon.com/UnravelingAdoption Check out our website: http://UnravelingAdoption.com Create your own podcast through Libsyn: https://signup.libsyn.com/?promo_code=ADOPTION =============== Please rate (*****) and/or review Unraveling Adoption in Apple Podcasts and Spotify (even if you listen to it on another app). Your feedback will help more listeners find our episodes. Thank you! =============== TIME STAMPS: 00:00:00 - Introduction to Unraveling Adoption 00:00:44 - Introducing Gretchen Sisson 00:01:41 - Gretchen's Research Journey 00:02:53 - Understanding Sociology 00:04:10 - Qualitative vs. Quantitative Research 00:05:36 - Impactful Stories in Adoption 00:06:40 - Response to Gretchen's Book 00:07:53 - Abortion and Adoption Dynamics 00:09:03 - Post-Dobbs Adoption Trends 00:10:55 - The Supply and Demand of Adoption 00:12:49 - Financial Aspects of Adoption 00:13:28 - Redirecting Adoption Funds 00:14:55 - Birth Mothers' Financial Needs 00:16:15 - Adoptee Perspectives on Adoption 00:17:37 - Adoptive Parents' Reactions 00:19:53 - Complexities of Adoption 00:22:06 - Supporting Adoptive Families 00:23:39 - Infertility and Adoption 00:25:23 - Broader Perspectives on Parenthood 00:27:39 - Listening to Adoptees 00:29:35 - Final Thoughts and Takeaways 00:31:09 - Where to Find Gretchen's Work 00:31:49 - Upcoming Events from Unraveling Adoption 00:33:05 - Closing Remarks…
1 Navigating Identity: A Korean Adoptee's Journey with Nathan Nowack - Ep 174 26:12
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Play Later Play Later Lists Like Liked"I...sometimes I forget that I'm Asian unless I see myself in a mirror." -- Nathan Nowack Read the Transcript: https://app.swellai.com/t/tp_01JEAFSD4KFY07AFGENGAPDN7A EPISODE SUMMARY: In this episode of Unraveling Adoption, I had the pleasure of speaking with Nathan Nowack, a Korean adoptee, professional photographer, and co-host of The Janchi Show . Nathan shared his adoption story, having been adopted from Korea at just five and a half months old and raised in a predominantly white community in Oklahoma. He reflected on his childhood, noting the lack of cultural representation and the challenges of navigating his Asian identity in a world that often sees him as different. We discussed the complexities of transracial adoption, including the impact of his parents' approach to race and culture. Nathan emphasized the importance of understanding and acknowledging one's racial identity, especially in a society that often overlooks these nuances. He shared his experiences with microaggressions and the emotional toll they can take on adoptees, highlighting the need for greater awareness and sensitivity. Nathan also spoke about his involvement with KAAN (Korean American Adoptee Adoptive Family Network) and how connecting with other adoptees has been instrumental in his healing journey. He described the sense of community he found there and the importance of sharing diverse adoption stories, acknowledging that each experience is unique. As a father of three multiple-ethnicity children, Nathan is committed to helping them understand their cultural heritage. He shared how he incorporates Asian traditions and celebrations into their lives, ensuring they have a strong sense of identity. This conversation was rich with insights into the complexities of adoption, identity, and community. I hope listeners find Nathan's story as inspiring and enlightening as I did. Be sure to check out The Janchi Show and connect with Nathan on Instagram for more of his journey and perspectives. Thank you for joining us, and I look forward to our next episode! =============== 📘Get our new book Adoption and Suicidality: amazon.com/Adoption-Suicidality-Healthcare-Professionals-Unraveling/dp/B0DCBCTSLL 📆 Community Calendar: UnravelingAdoption.com/Calendar ✨Healing the Adoption Constellation database: UnravelingAdoption.com/Healing 💌Sign up for our Unraveling Adoption email list: http://eepurl.com/hVIAVX =============== RESOURCES: Nathan’s information: Find Nathan on Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/nnowack/ Check out Nathan’s Podcast: www.janchishow.com and https://www.instagram.com/janchishow/ Find out more about KAAN: www.wearekaan.org and https://www.instagram.com/wearekaan/ =============== =============== Unraveling Adoption is produced and hosted by Beth Syverson Music written and performed by Joseph Nakao Email questions or comments to Beth@UnravelingAdoption.com Find us on Facebook , Instagram , and YouTube Support Unraveling Adoption on Patreon: http://Patreon.com/UnravelingAdoption Check out our website: http://UnravelingAdoption.com Create your own podcast through Libsyn: https://signup.libsyn.com/?promo_code=ADOPTION =============== Please rate (*****) and/or review Unraveling Adoption in Apple Podcasts and Spotify (even if you listen to it on another app). Your feedback will help more listeners find our episodes. Thank you! =============== TIME STAMPS: 00:00:00 - Introduction to Unraveling Adoption Welcome to the podcast and introduction of host Beth Syverson and guest Nathan Nowack. 00:01:26 - Nathan's Adoption Story Nathan shares his background as a Korean adoptee raised in a predominantly white environment. 00:02:50 - Cultural Representation in Upbringing Discussion on the lack of Asian cultural representation in Nathan's childhood. 00:03:50 - Transracial Adoption and Parental Awareness Nathan reflects on his adoptive parents' understanding of transracial adoption. 00:05:32 - The Melting Pot Mentality Exploration of the "colorblind" approach to race and its implications for Nathan. 00:06:52 - Microaggressions and Identity Nathan discusses experiences with microaggressions and their impact on his identity. 00:08:38 - Community and Connection The importance of finding community among other adoptees for support and understanding. 00:09:18 - Involvement with KAAN Nathan explains his role in the Korean American Adoptee Adoptive Family Network (KAAN). 00:10:56 - Upcoming KAAN Conference Details about the next KAAN conference and its themes. 00:11:41 - Healing Through Shared Stories How connecting with other adoptees aids in Nathan's healing journey. 00:12:30 - The Complexity of Adoption Stories Discussion on the varied experiences of adoptees and the ongoing nature of loss. 00:13:44 - Reunion with Biological Family Nathan shares his experience of reuniting with his biological siblings. 00:15:17 - Communication Challenges with Siblings The difficulties of connecting with his siblings due to language barriers. 00:16:37 - Sibling Trauma and Adoption Exploration of the trauma experienced by Nathan's siblings regarding his adoption. 00:17:45 - Parenting Mixed-Race Children Nathan discusses raising his children with awareness of their diverse heritage. 00:19:15 - Cultural Education for Children How Nathan incorporates Asian culture and representation into his children's lives. 00:20:37 - Food and Cultural Connection Nathan's love for food and how it connects him to his heritage and family. 00:21:50 - Living Through His Children Reflections on how Nathan experiences his own identity through his children's upbringing. 00:22:45 - Closing Thoughts and Resources Nathan expresses gratitude for the opportunity to share his story and offers ways to connect.…
1 Adoption Songs: Exploring the Complexities of Adoption Through Music with Lori Evans Ermi and Kate Ermi 25:10
25:10 Play Later Play Later Lists Like Liked25:10
Play Later Play Later Lists Like Liked"I think now that we have this knowledge, then we can use our story to help create awareness." - Lori Evans Ermi Read the transcript here: https://app.swellai.com/t/tp_01JDRMT4Z5RGJ6SD35WBFBT4PM EPISODE SUMMARY: In this episode of Unraveling Adoption, I had the pleasure of welcoming Lori Evans Ermi and her 17-year-old daughter, Kate Ermi, both of whom are adoptees and co-wrote their new book, Adoption Songs. Our conversation delved into the complexities of adoption from their unique perspectives, highlighting the emotional layers that come with their experiences. Lori shared her journey as a domestic adoptee from the baby scoop era, detailing her late discovery of her adoption at the age of eight and the trust issues that arose from that revelation. Despite having loving adoptive parents, she faced challenges in her identity and connection to her biological roots. Kate, on the other hand, has always known she was adopted and has navigated her own path of understanding her heritage, which was further illuminated through DNA testing. We discussed the creation of Adoption Songs, where each chapter is framed as a track, with contributors choosing songs that resonate with their adoption stories. The book aims to provide a broad perspective on adoption, acknowledging both the joys and the inherent losses that come with it. Lori emphasized the importance of music as a healing tool, and Kate shared her lifelong passion for music, which has been a source of comfort for her. Throughout our conversation, we touched on the significance of community and shared experiences among adoptees, as well as the need for more resources and support for young adults in the adoption community. Lori and Kate's commitment to raising awareness and fostering understanding about adoption's complexities is truly inspiring. I encourage listeners to check out their book and visit their website, adoptionsongs.org, for more information and resources. Additionally, I shared details about an upcoming event, Adoption Healing Quest, which will take place in February 2025, aimed at exploring various healing modalities within the adoption community. Thank you for joining us in this important conversation, and I hope you find the insights shared by Lori and Kate as enlightening as I did. =============== 📘Get our new book Adoption and Suicidality: amazon.com/Adoption-Suicidality-Healthcare-Professionals-Unraveling/dp/B0DCBCTSLL 📆 Community Calendar: UnravelingAdoption.com/Calendar ✨Healing the Adoption Constellation database: UnravelingAdoption.com/Healing 💌Sign up for our Unraveling Adoption email list: http://eepurl.com/hVIAVX =============== RESOURCES: Lori and Kate’s information: Find their website with info about their book Adoption Songs: https://www.adoptionsongs.org/ Other resource mentioned in this episode: The Primal Wound by Nancy Verrier: https://www.amazon.com/Primal-Wound-Understanding-Adopted-Child/dp/0963648004 =============== Unraveling Adoption is produced and hosted by Beth Syverson Music written and performed by Joseph Nakao Email questions or comments to Beth@UnravelingAdoption.com Find us on Facebook , Instagram , and YouTube Support Unraveling Adoption on Patreon: http://Patreon.com/UnravelingAdoption Check out our website: http://UnravelingAdoption.com Create your own podcast through Libsyn: https://signup.libsyn.com/?promo_code=ADOPTION =============== Please rate (*****) and/or review Unraveling Adoption in Apple Podcasts and Spotify (even if you listen to it on another app). Your feedback will help more listeners find our episodes. Thank you! =============== TIME STAMPS 00:00:00 - Welcome to Unraveling Adoption Introduction to the podcast and hosts, Beth, Lori, and Kate. 00:01:10 - Adoptee Stories: Lori's Journey Lori shares her adoption story, including her experiences and feelings about being adopted. 00:04:47 - Adoptee Stories: Kate's Journey Kate discusses her adoption experience and her understanding of her identity. 00:06:45 - The Complexity of Adoption Discussion on the layers of adoption and the importance of understanding different perspectives. 00:07:33 - Creating Adoption Songs Exploration of the book "Adoption Songs" and the involvement of both Lori and Kate in its creation. 00:10:43 - The Primal Wound Concept Introduction to the concept of The Primal Wound and its significance in adoption narratives. 00:11:45 - Future Plans for Adoption Songs Plans for a sequel to the book and the inclusion of more diverse perspectives. 00:12:38 - The Role of Music in Healing Discussion on how music plays a significant role in the lives of Lori and Kate. 00:14:40 - Untangling Our Roots Experience Kate shares her experience at the Untangling Our Roots event and the impact of hearing others' stories. 00:18:03 - Navigating Complex Emotions Lori and Kate discuss the complexities of their relationship and the duality of love and loss in adoption. 00:21:29 - Mainstream Adoption Narratives The importance of presenting adoption stories in a way that is accessible and relatable to a broader audience. 00:22:30 - Finding Resources and Support Information on where to find the book and additional resources related to adoption. 00:23:26 - Upcoming Events and Closing Thoughts Announcement of future events and a closing message of gratitude to listeners.…
1 The Male Adoptee Experience: Understanding Anger, Vulnerability, and Community with Tim Perdion - Ep 172 32:29
32:29 Play Later Play Later Lists Like Liked32:29
Play Later Play Later Lists Like Liked"I almost feel like there was a blueprint, and I was a character to fit into that blueprint." -- Tim Perdion Episode Summary: In this episode of Unraveling Adoption, I had the opportunity to speak with Tim Perdion, an adoptee from Ohio who has spent the last decade navigating his journey of self-discovery and healing. Tim shares his experience of being adopted shortly after birth and the feelings of not belonging that plagued him throughout his childhood. Despite growing up in a loving family, he struggled with anger and a sense of isolation, which led him to seek validation through sports and relationships. As a teenager, Tim turned to substances to cope with his internal struggles, leading to a reputation for overindulgence in high school. After facing personal crises in adulthood, including two divorces, he sought help at a trauma and addiction clinic, where he began to confront the deeper issues related to his adoption. Tim highlights the lack of focus on adoption-related trauma in traditional recovery settings and emphasizes the importance of vulnerability and community for male adoptees. He introduces the concept of the "orphaned heart," describing the emotional barriers adoptees build to protect themselves from feelings of abandonment and rejection. Tim encourages younger male adoptees to explore their inner worlds and seek support, reminding them that they are not alone in their struggles. This episode is a heartfelt exploration of the complexities of adoption, the significance of community, and the power of vulnerability. I hope Tim's story resonates with many and inspires others to seek understanding and connection in their own journeys. =============== 📘Get our new book Adoption and Suicidality: amazon.com/Adoption-Suicidality-Healthcare-Professionals-Unraveling/dp/B0DCBCTSLL 📆 Community Calendar: UnravelingAdoption.com/Calendar ✨Healing the Adoption Constellation database: UnravelingAdoption.com/Healing 💌Sign up for our Unraveling Adoption email list: http://eepurl.com/hVIAVX =============== RESOURCES: Tim’s information: Email Tim at tim@prodigalpathways.com Tim’s Website: http://prodigalpathways.com/ Find Tim on LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/in/timperdion/ Find Tim on Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/tperdion Find Tim on Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/timperdion/ Books mentioned in the episode: The Primal Wound by Nancy Verrier: https://www.amazon.com/Primal-Wound-Understanding-Adopted-Child/dp/0963648004 Healing the Orphaned Heart: Renewal for the Misunderstood, the Abused, and Abandoned by Casey Treat: https://www.amazon.com/Healing-Orphaned-Heart-Misunderstood-Abandoned/dp/1577944518 =============== Unraveling Adoption is produced and hosted by Beth Syverson Music written and performed by Joseph Nakao Email questions or comments to Beth@UnravelingAdoption.com Find us on Facebook , Instagram , and YouTube Support Unraveling Adoption on Patreon: http://Patreon.com/UnravelingAdoption Check out our website: http://UnravelingAdoption.com Create your own podcast through Libsyn: https://signup.libsyn.com/?promo_code=ADOPTION =============== Please rate (*****) and/or review Unraveling Adoption in Apple Podcasts and Spotify (even if you listen to it on another app). Your feedback will help more listeners find our episodes. Thank you! =============== TIME STAMPS 00:00:00 - Introduction to Unraveling Adoption 00:01:24 - Tim's Childhood and Adoption Experience 00:03:47 - Struggles with Identity and Belonging 00:06:26 - The Impact of Family Dynamics 00:08:56 - Substance Use and Coping Mechanisms 00:10:51 - Seeking Help and Treatment 00:12:08 - Understanding Adoption Trauma 00:14:20 - The Journey of Self-Discovery 00:16:02 - Finding Community and Connection 00:19:05 - The Importance of Sharing Stories 00:20:17 - Challenges for Male Adoptees 00:22:05 - The Role of Forgiveness in Healing 00:24:46 - Learning to Ask for Help 00:27:04 - Advice for Younger Male Adoptees 00:29:44 - Resources and Community Support 00:30:57 - Conclusion and Call to Action…
1 The Plants Are Calling for the Adoption Constellation with Mee Ok Icaro - Ep 171 1:29:51
1:29:51 Play Later Play Later Lists Like Liked1:29:51
Play Later Play Later Lists Like Liked"The plants are always turning everything upside down because our culture is upside down." -- Mee Ok Icaro EPISODE SUMMARY: In this episode of Unraveling Adoption, I, Beth Syverson, welcome back Mee Ok Icaro, a previous guest who has shared her profound insights on adoption and healing through plant medicine. This episode is particularly special as we recorded as we prepared for an ayahuasca retreat in Costa Rica, where I participated in my first ceremony under Mee Ok’s guidance. We begin by discussing our feelings as the retreat approaches. I express my excitement mixed with a hint of fear, acknowledging that this experience is far outside my comfort zone. Mee Ok shares her own anticipation and the unique challenges of leading a retreat for the first time, emphasizing the importance of focusing on personal healing rather than taking on the burdens of others. Mee Ok elaborates on the concept of leadership in the context of plant medicine, contrasting it with traditional views. She explains that true leadership often involves humility and a willingness to learn from others, rather than a desire for power or control. This perspective shifts the narrative around what it means to guide others in their healing journeys. As we delve deeper into the preparations for the retreat, we discuss the rigorous dieta we have both been following. This dieta involves strict dietary and behavioral restrictions designed to prepare our bodies and minds for the transformative experience ahead. I share my struggles with giving up my phone and certain foods items and the impact of reducing external stimuli on my mental clarity and emotional well-being. Mee Ok and I also touch on the broader implications of accessibility to plant medicine, particularly for marginalized communities. We discuss the challenges faced by individuals from lower-income backgrounds in accessing these healing modalities and the need for a more equitable approach as psychedelics become more mainstream. Throughout the episode, we reflect on the importance of integration and preparation in the healing process. I share my personal journey with ketamine treatment and how it has helped me move away from antidepressants, highlighting the significance of active engagement in one's healing journey rather than passively relying on substances. As we conclude, we express our excitement for the upcoming retreat and the potential for profound transformation. We plan to record a follow-up episode after the retreat to share our experiences and insights gained during this journey. Join us as we explore the complexities of adoption, healing, and the transformative power of plant medicine in this thought-provoking episode. =============== 📘Get our new book Adoption and Suicidality: amazon.com/Adoption-Suicidality-Healthcare-Professionals-Unraveling/dp/B0DCBCTSLL 📆 Community Calendar: UnravelingAdoption.com/Calendar ✨Healing the Adoption Constellation database: UnravelingAdoption.com/Healing 💌Sign up for our Unraveling Adoption email list: http://eepurl.com/hVIAVX =============== RESOURCES: Mee Ok’s information: Connect with Mee Ok through her website: https://holdingcompassionate.space/ Hear Mee Ok’s previous Unraveling Adoption podcast episode, “Ayahuasca for Transforming Trauma and Pain with Mee Ok Icaro”: https://directory.libsyn.com/episode/index/id/28697873 Hear Mee Ok and Leslie Pate Mackinnon’s previous Unraveling Adoption podcast episode ”Insights from Plant Medicine for the Adoption Constellation with Mee Ok Icaro and Leslie Pate Mackinnon”: https://directory.libsyn.com/episode/index/id/31869557 Register for Mee Ok’s next Adoptee-Only Medicine Circle here: https://www.eventbrite.com/e/medicine-circles-for-adoptees-with-mee-ok-icaro-tickets-1011041370957 Other resources mentioned in this episode: Soltara Healing Center (Costa Rica): https://soltara.co/ \ Other Resources: Other Parents Like Me - http://oplm.com Heather Ross - Life Coaching for Parents who have a child struggling with addiction: https://heatherrosscoaching.com/ =============== Unraveling Adoption is produced and hosted by Beth Syverson Music written and performed by Joseph Nakao Email questions or comments to Beth@UnravelingAdoption.com Find us on Facebook , Instagram , and YouTube Support Unraveling Adoption on Patreon: http://Patreon.com/UnravelingAdoption Check out our website: http://UnravelingAdoption.com Create your own podcast through Libsyn: https://signup.libsyn.com/?promo_code=ADOPTION =============== Please rate (*****) and/or review Unraveling Adoption in Apple Podcasts and Spotify (even if you listen to it on another app). Your feedback will help more listeners find our episodes. Thank you! =============== TIME STAMPS 00:00:00 - Introduction to Unraveling Adoption Welcome to the podcast and introduction of hosts Beth Syverson and Mee Ok Icaro. 00:02:00 - Preparing for Ayahuasca Retreat Discussion about the upcoming ayahuasca retreat in Costa Rica and the preparation process. 00:03:30 - Emotional Readiness and Expectations Beth and Mee Ok share their feelings of excitement and fear as they approach the retreat. 00:05:30 - Redefining Leadership in Healing Spaces Mee Ok discusses her perspective on leadership and the importance of humility in guiding others. 00:09:00 - The Role of Ego in Leadership Exploration of how ego affects leadership and the qualities of a good leader. 00:12:00 - Accountability in Healing Environments Mee Ok emphasizes the need for accountability and trust in the retreat setting. 00:15:00 - The Importance of Preparation and Integration Discussion on the significance of preparation and integration in the healing process. 00:20:00 - Challenges of Accessibility in Psychedelic Healing Conversation about the barriers to accessing psychedelic treatments for various demographics. 00:23:00 - Personal Healing Journeys Beth shares her experiences with ketamine treatment and the importance of integration. 00:27:00 - The Process of the Dieta Mee Ok explains the dieta, its restrictions, and its role in preparing for the ayahuasca experience. 00:32:00 - Transformative Effects of Disconnecting Beth discusses the impact of reducing phone and media usage during the dieta. 00:35:00 - Commitment to Healing Work Mee Ok talks about the commitment required for serious healing and the importance of discipline. 00:40:00 - The Role of Tobacco in Healing Mee Ok shares her personal journey with tobacco and its significance in the healing process. 00:45:00 - Building Relationships with Plants and Healers Discussion on the importance of relationships with plants and healers in the dieta process. 00:49:00 - Conclusion and Future Intentions Wrap-up of the conversation and reflections on the journey ahead.…
1 Finding Empowerment through Sex Work as a Korean Adoptee with Kayla Tange - Ep 170 39:45
39:45 Play Later Play Later Lists Like Liked39:45
Play Later Play Later Lists Like LikedFinding Empowerment through Sex Work as a Korean Adoptee with Kayla Tange "I can be in my body, and in that moment, I feel safe." -- Kayla Tange EPISODE SUMMARY: In this episode of Unraveling Adoption, I had the privilege of speaking with Kayla Tange, a Korean adoptee raised by Japanese-American parents. She has navigated a unique and complex journey through life as an exotic dancer, performance artist, and sex worker. Kayla shared her adoption story, detailing her early life in an orphanage in Seoul before being adopted at six months old. We explored how her experiences with ADHD and autism influenced her career choices and her desire for connection. Kayla candidly discussed her entry into the world of sex work, revealing how it provided her with a sense of empowerment and control over her body—something she felt was taken from her during her adoption. Throughout our conversation, we touched on the themes of identity, belonging, and the emotional complexities that come with being an adoptee. Kayla's reflections on her work and the connections she forms with clients highlighted the often misunderstood aspects of sex work, challenging stereotypes and emphasizing the agency she feels in her choices. Kayla also read a powerful piece from her contribution to the anthology Whorephobia , which delves into her experiences and emotions surrounding her adoption and her work. Her insights offered a profound understanding of the intersections between adoption, identity, and the search for belonging. This episode is a deep dive into the complexities of adoption and the ways in which individuals navigate their identities and experiences. I encourage listeners to reflect on Kayla's story and the broader implications it has for understanding adoption and the diverse paths that adoptees may take. =============== 📘Get our new book Adoption and Suicidality: amazon.com/Adoption-Suicidality-Healthcare-Professionals-Unraveling/dp/B0DCBCTSLL 📆 Community Calendar: UnravelingAdoption.com/Calendar ✨Healing the Adoption Constellation database: UnravelingAdoption.com/Healing 💌Sign up for our Unraveling Adoption email list: http://eepurl.com/hVIAVX =============== RESOURCES: Kayla’s information: Email Kayla: kayla.tange@gmail.com Check out Kayla’s Website: kaylatange.com Follow Kayla on Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/kayla.tange/ Watch Kayla’s amazing short film Dear Mother: https://www.kaylatange.com/dear-mother Here’s the anthology, Whorephobia , that includes Kayla’s essay that she read on this episode: https://www.amazon.com/Whorephobia-Strippers-Art-Work-Life/dp/1644212277 Other Resources: APtitude Support Group for Adoptive Parents Facing Adoption’s Challenges: http://UnravelingAdoption.com/APtitude Other Parents Like Me - http://oplm.com Heather Ross - Life Coaching for Parents who have a child struggling with addiction: https://heatherrosscoaching.com/ =============== Unraveling Adoption is produced and hosted by Beth Syverson Music written and performed by Joseph Nakao Email questions or comments to Beth@UnravelingAdoption.com Find us on Facebook , Instagram , and YouTube Support Unraveling Adoption on Patreon: http://Patreon.com/UnravelingAdoption Check out our website: http://UnravelingAdoption.com Create your own podcast through Libsyn: https://signup.libsyn.com/?promo_code=ADOPTION =============== Please rate (*****) and/or review Unraveling Adoption in Apple Podcasts and Spotify (even if you listen to it on another app). Your feedback will help more listeners find our episodes. Thank you! =============== TIME STAMPS 00:00:00 - Introduction to Unraveling Adoption Welcome to the podcast and introduction of host Beth Syverson and her son Joey. 00:00:34 - Today's Topic: Sexuality and Sex Work Discussion on the focus of the episode regarding sexuality and sex work. 00:00:56 - Introducing Kayla Tange Introduction of guest Kayla Tange, her background as a Korean adoptee, and her work in the sex industry. 00:01:52 - Kayla's Adoption Story Kayla shares her adoption story, including her age at adoption and her upbringing. 00:02:32 - Early Interest in Performance Discussion on Kayla's early interest in dance and performance. 00:03:20 - Career Path and ADHD Diagnosis Kayla talks about her career journey and the impact of her ADHD and autism diagnosis. 00:04:49 - Transition to Sex Work Kayla explains how she transitioned into sex work and dancing. 00:05:59 - Job Satisfaction and Flexibility Discussion on the benefits of working as a dancer compared to retail jobs. 00:06:33 - ADHD and the Nature of the Job Exploration of how the job suited Kayla's ADHD tendencies. 00:08:06 - Connecting with Customers Kayla discusses the importance of connecting with customers and building relationships. 00:09:06 - Adoption Trauma and Connection Exploration of the link between adoption trauma and Kayla's need for connection. 00:10:25 - Empowerment through Sex Work Kayla shares her perspective on feeling empowered through her work. 00:12:17 - Commodification of Bodies Discussion on the commodification of bodies in adoption and sex work. 00:13:24 - Feelings of Displacement Kayla reflects on feelings of displacement related to her adoption. 00:14:01 - Experiences in Korea Kayla shares her experiences and feelings during her trips to Korea. 00:15:11 - Creating the Film "Dear Mother" Discussion on the process and impact of creating her film. 00:16:28 - The Power of Performance Kayla talks about the liberating aspects of performing. 00:17:56 - Family Dynamics and Support Kayla reflects on her adoptive family's support and concerns regarding her career. 00:19:13 - Community and Support in the Industry Discussion on the supportive community within the sex work industry. 00:20:12 - Advice to Her Younger Self Kayla shares what she would tell her 12-year-old self. 00:21:45 - Advice for Parents Kayla offers advice to parents about supporting their children's interests. 00:23:49 - Reading from Whorephobia Kayla reads a powerful piece from the anthology Whorephobia . 00:37:04 - Closing Thoughts and Future Plans Discussion on Kayla's ongoing work and future plans, along with closing remarks from Beth.…
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