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Helping you better understand Sex, Porn & Love Addiction; guiding you through the neuroscience of the brain and sharing what we now better understand about the brain's involvement, from childhood development. To help you effect change; find the real authentic you (whose truth self went off at a tangent in childhood); so that as you discover and become re-acquainted with the real you, having learnt to like yourself, you are equipped to be the best that you can be.Maximise the living of an inc ...
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Creating cringe to confident conversations around Sex, Porn, Emotional Intelligence, Intimacy & Relationships. For curious partners who want intimate, loving relationships. For proactive parents & professional caregivers who want to feel informed to make communication choices that nurture healthy growth of children & young people's sexuality, sexual & intimate relationships.
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Welcome to a NorthPoint Counseling Perspective, a podcast that addresses the intricate tapestry of individual, relational, marriage, parenting, problematic sexual behavior, partner betrayal trauma, and mental health issues.
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Award-winning weekly podcast that approaches psychology and mental health in an accessible way. Listen as our host Gabe Howard speaks candidly with experts, celebrities, and other notables to break down complex topics into simpler terms.
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"SHAME on you" - are particularly triggering, toxic & impactful words to Sex Addicts
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- On-Demand Programme Link - https://mailchi.mp/bb2a7b851246/kairos-centre Shame is set up in childhood. Life is unfair. Yep. The presence of shame is a particularly powerful driver for sexual addiction. Shame means “to hide” and is a hidden companion of Narcissism. SHAME + NARCISSISM = SEX ADDICTION Shame is the painful feeling of being unacceptab…
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Why Is Sex So Important In A Relationship?
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In this episode I wanted to dive into a topic that often gets overlooked or misrepresented: Why is sex so important in a relationship? For me, sex isn’t just about the physical connection—it’s a vital part of personal and relational growth. It’s through sexual expression that we tap into vulnerability, creativity, and intimacy with both ourselves a…
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Scapegoating can go on for only so long - folks with Sex Addiction!
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- On-Demand Programme Link - https://mailchi.mp/bb2a7b851246/kairos-centre Scapegoating can go on for only so long. Then a need to accept responsibility for adult choices. The Kairos Centre do an extensive History Taking to build a profile understanding of the adult, impacted by childhood development issues. The feedback hypothesis can cause your b…
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Women vs. Patriarchy: Breaking Free for Stronger Mental Health
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25:51
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How does the patriarchy shape women’s thoughts and actions, often without them realizing it? In this episode, Gabe Howard sits down with feminist thought leader Kara Loewentheil to discuss how patriarchal conditioning impacts women, both at work and at home. Kara explains the concept of the “brain gap” — the internal conflict between societal expec…
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What is sex positivity (Sexual Greatness)?
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In this episode, I delve into the concept of sex positivity, exploring what it truly means to embrace authenticity in our sexuality, gender expression, and intimate relationships. Drawing from Silva Neves, I define sex positivity as being true to oneself and making conscious, informed choices rooted in self-awareness. It’s about knowing who we are,…
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Don't forget the partner - in the Sex Addiction Recovery Journey
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- On-Demand Programme Link - https://mailchi.mp/bb2a7b851246/kairos-centre He “caused” our problems and yet once again the focus and everyone’s attention is on him. The family income is being used by him again for his benefit, on top of the spend he has already enjoyed on his addiction. It’s just not fair. I am left here with his stuff and don’t kn…
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In this episode, I dive into the intricacies of sexual desire, exploring the often misunderstood dynamics between men and women. One of the key points I touch on is how men frequently grapple with expressing their emotions, which can lead them to seek connection through sex. This isn't just about physical pleasure—it's about the release of oxytocin…
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It isn't all about me - this thing of Sex Addiction Recovery
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- On-Demand Programme Link - https://mailchi.mp/bb2a7b851246/kairos-centre If you are in a partnered relationship, re-build integrity with yourself by signing a 'Couples Recovery Plan'. Recovery - in a partnered relationship - is about the partnership, not only about your recovery at all. Your signature on the 'Couples Recovery Plan' can bolster yo…
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Shame as a Feminist Issue: Reclaiming Your Story
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Shame is everywhere, and for women, it’s a constant, uninvited guest. Join host Gabe Howard and writer Melissa Petro as they explore how shame functions as a tool to keep women in line—dictating what they can be, how they should look, and who they’re allowed to become. Melissa reveals the hidden forces at play that make women feel “not good enough,…
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In this episode of Taboo 2 Talked About, I’m opening up about a topic that we don’t often talk about: grief and loss. For many of us, it's uncomfortable, sometimes even taboo, to speak openly about these emotions. But today, I’m sharing my personal story of saying goodbye to my dog, Velma, and how that experience shaped the way I view grief and hon…
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Give back control brain: Then I won't need porn
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- On-Demand Programme Link - https://mailchi.mp/bb2a7b851246/kairos-centre The ability to quickly recognize fearful situations and other emotional signals, may be critical to survival, as it enables us to detect potential threats. The amygdala is believed to play a central role in these processes. The amygdala is a small, almond-shaped structure de…
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In this episode of Taboo 2 Talked About, I’m taking a closer look at what really makes relationships work. This episode is all about the key elements that contribute to fulfilling and lasting partnerships. But it’s not just about how we interact with others—it’s also about how we treat ourselves. I explore why self-acceptance is the foundation of a…
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Some replacement positive self-soothing Hamster wheel tools for Sex/Porn Addiction
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- On-Demand Programme Link - https://mailchi.mp/bb2a7b851246/kairos-centre They are called the 4 Elements tools - which I teach my EMDR ("trauma") clients. These self-soothing - much more healthy and positive impacting (but still are hamster wheel/repetitive/habit/neural pathway activities) - become the new "go-to" practices. In other words, instea…
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301
Election Anxiety: Navigating and Easing the Stress
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As political campaigns ramp up, many of us feel the pressure and anxiety that come with the constant stream of fear-based rhetoric. In this timely episode, Gabe Howard sits down with Dr. Michelle A. Patriquin, the director of research at the Menninger Clinic and an associate professor at Baylor College of Medicine, to explore the phenomenon of elec…
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In this episode I explore the concept of compulsions and how they differ from addictions, shedding light on behaviours that many of us may not even realise are compulsive. From gym routines to eating habits, I discuss how these patterns can be both healthy and unhealthy, depending on the context. One area I’m particularly passionate about is the im…
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Enhance sobriety by knowing which "Stage(s) of change" you are at in your Sex/Porn/Love Addiction Recovery
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- On-Demand Programme Link - https://mailchi.mp/bb2a7b851246/kairos-centre If you understand The Stages of Change, may be you will not be so hard on yourself and be liberated! May be you are not defective, weak, a worse case, a hopeless case or an unfixable case. Stop beating yourself up, since you are facing the same Relapses as those trying to qu…
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In this episode of Taboo 2 Talked About, I’m diving into a topic that many of us find difficult to address—porn use in relationships. It’s a conversation that can bring up a lot of emotions, and I know from personal experience just how challenging it can be to navigate this sensitive issue. In What If Your Partner Is Watching Porn?, I open up about…
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Sex & Tech - Slippery slope that ends badly for those with Sex & Porn Addiction
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- On-Demand Programme Link - https://mailchi.mp/bb2a7b851246/kairos-centre I need only a few words to summary this episode. The slippery slope of mis-using Technology, will always cost you more than you had bargained, in many aspects of life. The world of AI, VR, Silicone full size sex dolls (childlike or sex slave like), will take you down at some…
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Why We Fall for Fitness Quick Fixes and How to Break Free
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Why are we so drawn to the promise of quick fixes in our fitness goals, and why do they often lead to disappointment? In this episode, host Gabe Howard sits down with Dr. Cedric Bryant, CEO of the American Council on Exercise, to explore the psychological and social factors behind our attraction to these easy solutions. They discuss the evolving sc…
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In this episode of Taboo 2 Talked About, I’m diving into the heart of what it means to truly live in alignment with who we are. This episode is all about embracing authenticity—not just in our words, but in every aspect of our lives. I explore the profound impact of being true to ourselves, discussing how authenticity can liberate us from the heavy…
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Send us a text Behind The Smile by John Sternfels and Melissa Roberts is a real-life story of how one of John's clients, Melissa Roberts, overcame the horrors of being abused, traumatized, and sexually betrayed. As a result, Melissa experienced many psychological complexities, often behind a facade of happiness. The book is designed to offer reader…
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Porn & Sex Addicts re-wire their brain - a little at time
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- On-Demand Programme Link - https://mailchi.mp/bb2a7b851246/kairos-centre "Sticks & stones can break my bones, but names can never hurt me". That's not true! words do hurt. That means positive words can heal wounds. Hence, the basis for reciting "Pillars" - which are words that are spoken over yourself three times a day, every day. They can re-set…
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In this episode of Taboo 2 Talked About, I’m getting personal and sharing some of my recent experiences with illness. It’s been a challenging time, and it’s really made me rethink what it means to prioritize my health. I’ve had to confront my own limitations, and it’s been a humbling reminder of how crucial it is to put self-care at the top of my l…
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Why those with Sex Addiction are willing to risk such "Harmful Consequences"
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- On-Demand Programme Link - https://mailchi.mp/bb2a7b851246/kairos-centre For example, the highest download of porn is between the hours of 9am and 5pm. What are those hours? Where are most people, during those hours? What do most contracts say about being caught having downloaded such material at work? What consequences flow from exposure? Then w…
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Challenging Monogamy: Women Leading the Way in Open Relationships
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In this revealing episode, Dr. Tammy Nelson and Gabe Howard delve into the myths and realities of monogamy, infidelity, and open relationships. Discover surprising insights from Ashley Madison data and Dr. Nelson’s extensive research, revealing that women, not men, are often the gatekeepers of monogamy. Explore the dynamics of emotional and physica…
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In this intro podcast, I talk about my journey from being a sexual mute to a sex talk enthusiast. I explore how my background as an adopted child, catholic teacher and unknowingly becoming a partner of a sex & porn addict* led to both breakdown and liberation. I explore bridging a communication gap by talking openly about TABOO subjects, particular…
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"Objectification" is not (for Porn Addicts) about noticing the person, but about....
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- On-Demand Programme Link - https://mailchi.mp/bb2a7b851246/kairos-centre "Objectification" is not that you noticed the person. It is, that you linker longer or go back for a second or third look. "I am just appreciating God's creating", doesn't cut it! What a nightmare then, for Porn Addicts, are these Paris Olympics (and the holiday abroad in th…
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Porn-Blockers won't stop Porn Addiction viewing, but are essential
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- On-Demand Programme Link - https://mailchi.mp/bb2a7b851246/kairos-centre Porn-Blockers won't stop those who are determined to act out. Their use is, however, essential for those serious about achieving sobriety. It buys you time. It might get you through that day and enable you to add one more day to your sobriety count. Here are some Porn-Blocke…
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Unmasking Fakes: Is Mental Health the New Excuse? (From Listener Questions)
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Dive into a candid discussion on mental health as host Gabe Howard speaks with Rachael Beairsto, a senior editor for Healthline. Together, they tackle tough questions about authenticity and stigma provided by listeners like you. Explore how misconceptions and pop culture blur the lines between genuine struggles and excuses, examining why some may f…
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Psychosexual issues set up for those with Sex, Porn, Love Addiction
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Snippet of an interview with Caroline Brown of “This Crazy over 40s Life”: Sex with no strings attached - Part 5 - On-Demand Programme Link - https://mailchi.mp/bb2a7b851246/kairos-centre Worth listening to “Sexual Intelligence: More Science stuff” episodes – to recognise that there are consequence for Sex, Porn, Love Addiction patterns of behaviou…
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Many women (worldwide) became addicted to Sex & Porn during covid-19 lock down
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(Snippets from an Interview by Caroline Brown of "This Crazy over 40's Life Podcast") - Part 4 - On-Demand Programme Link - https://mailchi.mp/bb2a7b851246/kairos-centre Something shifted during Covid-19 lockdown. Many women enticed to use phones, computers and tablets during lockdown, crossed their own "values" boundaries, as it seemed reasonable …
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Discussing Porn Addiction and Anxiety, One (Podcast) Episode at a Time with Paul Gilmartin
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Paul Gilmartin, host of the “Mental Illness Happy Hour” podcast, and Gabe discuss Paul’s struggles with anxiety, financial pressures, and porn addiction. They emphasize the importance of support networks, self-compassion, and finding healthy coping mechanisms. Paul shares how he moved past pornography addiction toward more fulfilling hobbies and re…
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"Pinches & Crunches" in Relationships trigger escape into self-soothing with Sex, Porn, Love Addiction
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(Snippets from an Interview by Caroline Brown of "This Crazy over 40's Life Podcast") - Part 3 - On-Demand Programme Link - https://mailchi.mp/bb2a7b851246/kairos-centre Sameness and/or difference attracts and are bonded together; but something shifted somewhere along the journey. Falling out of love visited the couple, Something about Core Emotion…
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Couples Counselling at the right stage in the Sex, Porn, Love Addiction Recovery journey
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(Interviewed by Caroline Brown of This Crazy over 40's Life Podcast) - Part 2 - On-Demand Programme Link - https://mailchi.mp/bb2a7b851246/kairos-centre Navigating life is challenging. Navigating partnered/couple relationship is even more challenging. Add Sex, Porn, Love Addiction to the mix - when you are still trying to understand self. What are …
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Lonely Together: Unpacking the Silent Epidemic with Dr. Margaret Rutherford
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On today’s episode, Gabe interviews Dr. Margaret Rutherford, a clinical psychologist and the host of “The SelfWork Podcast.” They discuss the pressing issue of loneliness as a global health threat, likening its mortality effects to smoking 15 cigarettes a day, and explore its close relationship with depression. Rutherford emphasizes the importance …
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