I think I know how to tell this story with the objective being TO CHANGE POLICIES. First, recover as soon as you can hear your own thinking connecting to previous thoughts so it's not just a single thought it's NEW INFO (What You Just Learned!) connecting to a priori. All the previous are writing samples created by adrenaline created by ptsd. -----------------------------------------------moved on------------------------------------------------- Today is March 1, 2024 (3:59 CT) & I am writin ...
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Untitled Episode : omg, I didn't write in every container! It is truly over since it's DIFFERENT. That's prolonged exposure therapy, but instead of writing, I had to rely on www (ha!)
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This is the last PODCAST "w" ptsd, but I also don't think it's there at all. No charger. 3% battery. Never made the deadline---3 hours in one month time--didn't get the time zones to begin with & now it's super easy. 11 minutes to go & it's 10m & some seconds so made every GOAL. I finished season 2 episode 8 POEM 2 8 was "words better than great" w…
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All the biological uptick of ptsd is gone & now able to follow-through with what I said I would do. Contact those who I said at one point, "I'm highly injured. I'll contact you when I can." How many years ...
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One person can truly change your life but you gotta do it right. Less strife to each other, the words in me changing frequently. Giving up the past, the books I thought that would last & last. Their meaning, their feeling, I'm reeling & done believing [in them] SMART E MC presents Smarter Than Trauma | "Dating Mating & Relating" | a play. Definitel…
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Words Do Something to me with PAST & PRESENT verbatim triggers [until now]
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Smart E MC presents Smarter Than Trauma. When people don't talk about money & then when people bring up the silliest money issues. This is CONTRAST. We are in WORLD TWO dropping seeds for #videoGames #gamer & "what are you wearing and who are you talking to?" When people move in, they really do reveal their secrets like sabotaging Neppy! RECOVERY N…
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& the Reflection. This podcast & the one prior is to the 1-2 punch/kick/stab/choke/belittle combo.
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STEP ONE : get it out & did I. STEP TWO : reflect back* [one time] to check if I can stay here without physically (nerve radiculopathy & chronic pain) or mentally (ptsd) spiraling. STEP THREE : that's the final act. "What is she going to do about the ____!!!" You all freaked out about taking care of a disabled woman & yet, I'm into 100% equality am…
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Third Round 🥊 When you get IT out of the body with ART, We All Win. What's your preferred outlet? Mine's my voice. Now add beats.
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I'm going to start creating poetry & this podcast serves as the line between THE PAST, now firmly in THE PAST & the next & final step : transform. For anyone dealing with suicidal ideations please try to "catch" either the emotion, thought or behavior. You only have to deal with one, not all, since you tackle the one that is most present, most comm…
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The only thing I can remember is I may have repeated self a bit & at the end, yes, u take back that suicide shhhhh. Not mine once you name it/say it/spray it & finally slay/write IT/fight IT so u will ...
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First strategy will be sharing is breath. With chronic pain, breathing can hurt. Sneezing really hurt so making sure the house was clear due to cat allergies was a must & my priority & "job." Someone didn't have to be in my home after admitting... [let's just write that scene verbatim since the trick is I could keep writing & writing, but you want …
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This contains poetry, but to get there, you'll have to find the YouTube...
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...& to find the YouTube you'll have to scroll, tap & read. Skills that increase my vestibular [then]. I thought if someone was willing to do all that, that must mean something since this whole this is remind us education is fleeting. Don't blink, learning happens faster than you think. And if you squander the chance to get it by not participating,…
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We are going to Elevate Difference & NOT be like them. I reject their words, ideas, behaviors, philosophies & the MOTIVATION/INTENTION when you ask, "why?" | I lost this, but when I got it back, you really ...
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NEW SEASON since all of this is truly practice until "the test," which is politics because everything that happened to me, I was able to put into education as a student then a teacher (special ed. K-4. Severe/Profound. 2nd grade general ed) IN AUDIO/DIGITAL CONTAINER/NOTES (I do recall hearing this in the podcast, somewhere so record it. This is ba…
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When you confront the people who created the trigger & you get their response---that's it---first step--WHAT DO YOU THINK?--now use that info to make further interventions like, NO, I do not consent to ...
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Data is important to make good decision & being a behaviorist, concussed at workplace (special educator), can't unlearn how to quantify what is considered non-quantifiable (qualitative data), but you can. No hashtags. Just get it out! In the past, the place to put hashtags was another space to contain trauma until all characters were used up---that…
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When you can hear you voice, you can hear what you said & finish the thought/sentence. DONE
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UPDATE DESCRIPTION : Today is August 13, 2024 & am presently creating the 2nd to last podcast before the 19th of this month. This is a first go (to remove to audio TT of "my parents never taught me" & "this is my first.") Please listen & this is original podcast [link] if you want to hear it in its entirety. 1) 3:40--4:02 | How did you lose two cla…
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Advocacy is a dialogue, but can also be a monologue ***TRIGGER WARNINGS*** we discuss fake art activist & intent to create ****.
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I've successful confronted & gotten ahead of the word "NOT" since I used to say, "advocacy is a dialogue, not a monologue" because it's the back-and-forth that can support concussion recovery, not the non-responses, eyes that bug out & visual moments that have stuck. MEMORY ON REPLAY : BORAT. The youTube channel connected to this podcast contains t…
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The best words really will end trauma by giving you IDEAS! They want US[A] disconnected, so let's CONNECT! SMC with STT presents DMR. Thank you! I'm going to now deSCRIBE how I got on What's App. It took years and a story about a child in distress! Not just any child, one with special needs. Support the Show.…
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NOTE : The visuals/new & past notes are in the YouTube channel as well (to remove it from this computer--memory capacity!) & haven't done that for awhile. -- R shoulder pain really up limiting time I can be at computer. -- L hip pain in down -- centralizing toward spine & in buttocks with radiating pain in 4 places. Difference with radiating pain […
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internet research started today & because the internet is a container for PTSD/SUICIDE there are ways to contain it. IF SOMEONE REACHES OUT TO YOU or has DMs, messages, behaviors that are completely different, it's perfectly OK to ask, "what's happening?" or just call them. Don't wait, as soon as you get it. The text comes in and you notice it's fr…
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2-WAY CONSENT for recording & why that's a law/felony. This creates tt. Lowercase to validate, on the way out, but also, "no respect"
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Just listen. I'm done with this space. Just meaning it happened. I can hear my voice. No need for MY voice over theirs since there's nothing RISING UP (mental abuse) or BATTERING DOWN (physical assault) The purpose of ptsd? You're in survival mode so ears/eyes alit and ready to absorb. What you hear/see may mean you get to make it another day. Unti…
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The Dark[ness] is OK if (a) never forget WHO (b) fight to ensure NEVER HAPPENS AGAIN
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SmarterThanTrauma™ ©SMART E MC Support the Show.By SMART E MC
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PART III | I don't have to share the whole convo. I just have to LISTEN TO MY VOICE
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& reflect. It sounds like a really "OFF" me so what is that? How did I even begin in this type of advocacy? TO GET OUT OF MY HOUSE & WHO WAS I MOST GRATEFUL FOR? WHO I SAID HELLO TO FIRST [matters]. SmarterThanTrauma™ ©SMART E MC Support the Show.By SMART E MC
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THIS MAY HAVE BEEN UPLOADED EARLIER | will check time, but ultimately... it has highest # (so I know, choice isn't intact)
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May 24, 2024 LISTENED to "bits" to know, what is this? STEP ONE : get it out and IN SPACEs that absolutely are the scariest (just like "write the ugliest stuff on prettiest paper" & since SPACE was "Neptune [around the planets we zoom"] so that means---find that YouTube video. OK #botany #boomerang #PeterPan #RobinWilliams #s[uicide] #boom. The pho…
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PART III | & then you stop... because IT is NOT there anymore :)
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...moved on a long time ago when decided "to teach" a third & final curriculum to see if it would put teaching away & return me to whole. It did! SmarterThanTrauma™ ©SMART E MC Support the Show.By SMART E MC
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GOAL : find convo regarding Mr. Baker (notes for Monday | What to find/email & Who to call (E)
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This are my notes. Thanks for supporting those living with difference in recovery & a ton of stigma I will be writing about since that was suicide & now it's back to ORIGIN/THEM. SmarterThanTrauma™ ©SMART E MC Support the Show.By SMART E MC
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When the shock of HOW EASY PEOPLE USE THEIR TRAUMA TO... or CHANGE THEIR NARRATIVE...
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I'll be saving around 15m for PART III of Mr. Baker which is my conversion with Ms. ___ who can hopefully OK the voucher then pair 14/18 client to proper school TO TEACH him what he needs to pass knowing he has little experience with tech & this type of thing for reasons HE CAN SHARE, but he has shared since for step in Homeless Advocacy is Trustwo…
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PART II | May 9th, something incredible happened. Will upload a lot of that since the "in between time" I think is...
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...estimation & making accurate guesses is a skill. Learn to make your mistakes in school where there are people who are encouraging you to succeed unlike {you fill-in-the-blank]. This is mine, but also, the purpose of IT when the words were "forced to..." ummm yea, ok. Get out. Also, too similar to that time in school when... And then when I saw b…
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PART ONE | how difficult it is when everyone is promoting communication COMPARE/CONTRAST with those actively trying to disconnect
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I figured out why I couldn't podcast last 2 months or so (no excuses just counting triggers & confronting) & now, I know, sometimes it's those that say "biggest supporter [of vindicating kids with special needs]" & "all in!" when given the option are the ones messin' up your Flo'[eTRY, poeTRY]. Exposed to creatively & no wrong answers, just mistake…
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part ONE of many | before & after THE FALL | anticipation & will to float & the reality of trauma & triggers (NOW tt) is stated very clearly the very thing said specifically. IF/THEN.
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Starting ~8 days ago. It's May 9th so that means yesterday, I was able to stay silent & in quiet, there was no noise & no sensation in body/face so it was--quiet--5 seconds then pain would start to be sensed. The day before yesterday I noticed I could do that for 2-3 seconds, METHODOLOY When the recovery has achieved neutral[ized] status... ADVOCAT…
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Note-taking & Starting to Write out "their words" verbatim since I think it'll end ptsd.
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Just say it once without any fear & full on consent meaning, whatever happens, I'm always going to be a mandated recorder/reporter of abuse & neglect. "I have the "after visit summary" from Dr. Guy Rowley who dismissed what I had stated, writing a completely false narrative since did not include the diminishing physical impairments but also THE GOO…
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This is where I can end. UPLOAD VISUAL & delete this.
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...Then GO BACKWARDS & upload this month's visuals to yt. Then start writing those NOTES into sentences into paragraphs into one final draft. Field Notes. Support the Show.By SMART E MC
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Listen to VMs & delete/abandon anything that does NOT fit into methodology.
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Support the Show.By SMART E MC
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Support the Show.By SMART E MC
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When you FIND THE TRIGGER & ADDRESS IT, IT does go away.
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The first trigger will be the red blinking hand since that brought back anxiety sobriety. FIRST DATE (pinned to X) : LET IT OUT : March 18, 2024 Support the Show.By SMART E MC
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...and grooving. SmarterThanTrauma™ ©SMART E MC Support the Show.By SMART E MC
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the prompting event was the brainwashing/grooming/mental, physical, s.a & more, but the CONTINUATION was awareness that the connective thread is INSANE GREED (on the backs of kids with special needs ...
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I can't wait to get 100% well & then layer the process I used TO END (a) ptsd (b) suicide & (c) reverberating chronic pain leading to increase symptoms of (a) & (b). Based on DATA, the decision using what I learned at NWMH's cbt/dbt since they taught me the methodology so to please ignorance is too much like anxiety/sobriety's confusion & then expl…
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2nd STEP : whatever you hear (in this case, previous 2 podcasts) REFLECT
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The purpose is to understand how these triggers connect, like a food web. After NWMH'S CBT/DBT's (unthoughtful & lazy facilitation) first & only step of "describe the trigger & use WISEMIND to make the best decision in the moment," the decision was to always confront knowing if you wait, more likely the person or people will not remember. While it'…
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It's true that in order to do a higher-level thinking skill set like writing you have to have some pre-requisites e.g. hearing own voice, not ptsd triggering/flashbacking, able to re-read and edit requiring the ability to hold more than one thought (not being in-the-moment only) and other basics. I'm going to start writing the worst behaviors & it …
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I a still figuring it out | Am avoiding since not sure if I have all the skills necessary if I have to TOUCH paper in the office since OUT-OF-SIGHT-OUT-OF-MIND makes organization very hard
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I think I'm ahead of all triggers now. SmarterThanTrauma™ ©SMART E MC Support the Show.By SMART E MC
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Hearing self. Yes, Getting back to a day to day schedule, at last. Find the Meghan M. convos and while searching, will force self to listen to everything else & make decisions. Keep or Abandon.
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That's it. I know how to organize this. SmarterThanTrauma™ ©SMART E MC Support the Show.By SMART E MC
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No time stress. No need for visual triggers. No nothing. It's over, so now what?
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Organize this & start writing those letters & sharing the steps to dampen each trigger to get to this point because first you have to do what's most comfortable to take off that edge, I'm looking over, before he.... When someone is so specific about what they will do, if you do a, b, c, d, then yes, you may get a little brainwashed. I'm okay with t…
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I learned how to swim ~Wednesday, February 17. When people know your weaknesses they will take advantage. He knew I was dizzy & we sent xmas cards (THE CHRISTMAS LETTER & need for photos) stating we're ...
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This project was about changing policies for kids with special needs or share what I know to s/v in the ER & remind them people out there care since I had that after mine & I wanted to bury everything in spaces no one could understand, but now, it's better to just be clear. The past is in the past. Now, change the future for others I started hearin…
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It's a new day! A new way to end trauma. Hip hip hooray!
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This is the first time (of many times) I’ll be writing while listening which is the basis for the skill set, note taking. If I write something 3x, that means I heard it & then re-listened or it came in as an echo. There's a link at the bottom for the rest of the audio/visual together (:09) SECONDS : SHELLS (:13) CHIME (:26) : LArry LAbiak (02:08) :…
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The time is 11:58PM (sssstress, but nothing like anticipating those monthly meetings) & how can I sum up my time here in 2 minutes? 100% created by b.o.d./tbg & number 17
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SmarterThanTrauma™ ©SMART E MC Support the Show.By SMART E MC
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HEALTHCARE : 2nd go & this time, we don't wait for NWMH/neurologist to respond (are you going to testify or not? You said, "I'm on the side of kids with special needs," yvonne 😐) We do it LIVE (in-the ...
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I will update this process as it goes which is DIFFERENT than the first go---with Northwestern Memorial Hospital (NWMH)---since didn't know what to do mostly since in shock, but kept trying to do wisemind (make the best decision for you in the moment considering creative/emotional & rational/logical hemispheres of the brain according to DBT from NW…
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FIRST TIME : specific triggers connected to tv/film seed planted GOAL : go to the movies
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Hear/See Something, Do Something [as long as it's not self-harm]. I hear self speaking about a child with profound & severe needs SmarterThanTrauma™ ORIGIN : principal who hired me stating "work smarter, not harder" & reminded us weekly at the principal's meeting (cancelled under new admin) Wednesday mornings, we don't handpick our students (it's T…
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First Time : plant the seed TONIGHT so tomorrow, I remember exactly the next step.
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I am listening to this : Sunday, January 28th @ 11:17 PM There will be an edited version at this YouTube : found another! to plant the seed for VIDEO since I made trauma 3-D (you can see it/hear it & I hope you think, "well this is different," since that's what I thought over & over, knowing difference/biodiversity/not being like anyone else is a g…
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Good "INVESTMENTS" in Neighborhoods. I think the visual & audio noise are finally broken up. Visuals will be on YouTube under "LSNE," thank you! SmarterThanTrauma™ ©SMART E MC Support the Show.By SMART E MC
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reliving CHASE (first time writing a letter) & now, I have to write another one
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The objective is to continuously HEAR SELF (by listening to everything recorded) until all ptsd is gone.
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To determine when & if ptsd is gone, there can not be audio or visual distractions that last longer than 1x/hr and cannot be flicked away in under 1 second so automatically. AUTOMATICITY is the goal. this month's goal is to remove as many media files & (a) RECORD DATA from HCHSMP file (b) finish letter--1st professionally & also will state steps in…
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More Methodology | Aim for 3 hours | Removing Media, too | One day, will explain it
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Let's Explain FILMS are WAY TOO REAL. The seed... planted YEARS AGO.
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This is hard to explain, but for now, it's a way to recall day-to-day as I reconnect someone who understands the behind-the-scenes, but was not the seed to end trauma. Now, let's ask the right questions & start to understand how this methodology works. It's really simple. You let people know, no thanks! SmarterThanTrauma™ ©SMART E MC Support the Sh…
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What was written in here was already written in there. TODAY IS January 3rd, 2024. Happy New Year! Getting rid of media.
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TODAY IS 03/3/24 Today is April 28, 2023 (7:01CT) & ptsd is over because secured numbers & now reading waaaay better without head pain & flashbacks. Will be going through all 2-D (online) & 3-D (written) [Nordstrom] notes & posting in ~50 sites. Comment on 10/19/23 update : SKIMMING; reliving that event so I can find the date of that annual meeting…
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New Day : just get it out to UNDERSTAND STRATEGY of layering.
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I would layer my clothes like a lot of Midwesterners. Extra layers meant extra protection & a non-verbal cue to me, I'm feeling a little unsafe with the world around me so add another layer & another & another until you "feel" it. I would feel the subtle changes & tension when I added more clothing knowing it may take longer to get ready & out the …
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