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Ever feel like friendships are too complicated, superficial, or disappointing? And yet you don’t want to swear them off completely because you also crave the feeling of having close, comfortable, and meaningful relationships? You’re not alone! In the first season of Frientimacy, social relationships expert Shasta Nelson goes behind the scenes of her own real-life friendships to unpack the challenges they’ve faced and how they overcame them to forge an even stronger bond. Because let’s face i ...
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Reframeables

Rebecca & Natalie Davey

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Do you feel alone in your own head when it comes to navigating life’s big and small problems? Do you find self-care language a little too self-focused but know you still need to do the work? Join us on Reframeables and eavesdrop your way into some new perspectives — we promise you'll feel less alone as you listen. We are Nat and Bec, two very different sisters who come together each week to reframe some of life's big and small stuff. Nat's a PhD whose favourite phrase is “let’s reframe that! ...
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Have you ever felt connected to a place? Well, it turns out that the places all around us hold more power than we think. I'm Julia Suca, your curious guide, with a love for coffee, travel, and psychology. In each episode, I chat with experts and explore all sorts places, from the ordinary to the downright bizarre. Together we’ll venture from the cozy corners of coffee shops that teach us the power of community to the peaks of the world’s tallest mountains that dare us to live life on the edg ...
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What is it about certain environments that make them ideal for forming friendship? Why do some places encourage deeper connections while others seem to keep us at arm's length? To help untangle this, I turned to someone who knows the ins and outs of friendship better than anyone else: Shasta Nelson. Shasta is a friendship expert, speaker, and the a…
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In today’s episode, Shasta and her friend Karen confront a struggle they’re still having—it seems like Karen is always busy, even when they’re together. Karen considers why she always has a full plate, and reveals the key to getting her attention and what she wishes her friends knew. Shasta gets vulnerable about feeling like an obligation and affir…
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We often have conversations with folks who have written books. In this episode of Reframeables, Nat has a thoughtful conversation with child therapist Niomi Cherney, who’s in the midst of drafting her very own book on how to talk to loved ones with opposing viewpoints — think Trump supporter at one end of the table, and leftist liberal at the other…
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So you got dumped by a friend—no warning, no explanation, not even a text back. What happened? Nearly 80% of us have been ghosted at some point, and while it’s more commonplace in the dating world, it can happen with friends too. In this episode, Shasta interviews three women who were ghosted by close friends. They open up about what they wish thei…
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After a girls’ weekend, Shasta returned home feeling drained – her friend J’Leen seemed to often take things personally and question how accepted she was in the group. Again, they’d spent much of their time together reassuring her to no avail. Today, Shasta and J’Leen explore how J’Leen’s fears of rejection and abandonment developed, how her attemp…
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In today’s episode, Shasta reflects on what we can learn from our physical health to develop better social health, and how we can heal from heartbreak and disappointment to create more meaningful friendships. Conflict in a relationship can be uncomfortable, awkward, and—at times—painful. But it’s when we persist through the discomfort that we start…
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Shasta and Kim were colleagues and couple friends . . . then Shasta called her crying out of the blue. She’d had an affair, a divorce, and had been fired from her job. But while other friends and colleagues pulled away, judged, and disappeared, Kim and Shasta only grew closer. In today’s episode, the two unpack how Shasta’s personal crisis affected…
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Shasta sits down with her friend Valerie to discuss the time a hurtful conversation drove a wedge between them. They spill their regrets and what they wish they could tell their past selves. They reveal how they not only rekindled their friendship but grew to become best friends today. Finally, they consider strategies to ask for what we need in a …
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Friendships can get a little messy, but at the other end of the muck are often more supportive and meaningful relationships. Join Shasta for the debut episode of Frientimacy, as she reveals the 3 requirements for all healthy relationships that helped her and her own friends navigate conflict and disappointment to deepen their connections. Shasta al…
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What's it really like to travel the world without flying? Today's guest has a story that takes world travel to a whole new level. Thor Pedersen recently returned from a ten-year adventure, traveling to every country in the world with one major caveat—he never set foot on an airplane. While many aim to visit every country, Thor is the only one who's…
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Welcome to “Frientimacy: Finding Our Way to More Fulfilling Friendships” —the show that reminds us through shared stories and research-backed teaching that friendships, while they may not always be easy, that doesn’t mean they aren’t worth it. My name is Shasta Nelson and I’ve been researching, coaching, speaking, and writing books about our friend…
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Dive into the world of cults and the power of persuasive places. Hollywood, with its glitz, glamour, and allure, serves as the backdrop for former cult member Chris Johnston's journey. Join us as we uncover the chilling realities of cult psychology, delving into the heart of the Buddhafield—a cult led by the enigmatic Jaime Gomez. Founded on princi…
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Is street art a legitimate art form or just plain vandalism? From the graffiti culture of the 1970s to today's vibrant murals, we'll uncover the evolution of street art and its impact on cities and neighborhoods. Discover how artists like Keith Haring and Banksy have reshaped perceptions of street art, turning once-gritty urban landscapes into vibr…
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Today we open the door to the transformative power of our homes with the insiring Anita Yokota! As a therapist-turned-interior designer, Anita brings a unique perspective on how our homes can influence our wellbeing, happiness, and identity. In this episode, she shares practical tips and inspiring stories from her book, 'Home Therapy', revealing ho…
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For this episode of Reframeables, we had the opportunity to speak with award-winning poet and novelist Canisia Lubrin about her new book Code Noir. After the interview, she sent the Reframeables duo an email, calling us both badass and tender, which is probably the best compliment we’ve ever been given — so there’s that. For context about her book,…
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Step onto the stage with improv comedian, James McGee, as we explore how the stage isn't just a place for laughs – it's a playground for personal growth and overcoming fears. James shares his insights and stories from the spotlight, offering a glimpse into the magic of live performance. Whether you're a seasoned performer or just curious about what…
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Get ready to crack open the door into the spooky world of haunted places with paranormal expert, Jeff Belanger! In this episode, we'll explore the eerie allure of these mysterious locations. From creepy castles to haunted houses, join us as we explore why we're irresistibly drawn to haunted places, even in the face of fear. Get ready for a haunting…
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We are reframing the productivity narrative with Instagram and Substack-famous sketch artist Nishant Jain — otherwise known as the Sneaky Artist. Nishant trained as an engineer, almost got his PhD, and then switched tracks to make art in public — sneakily. Now his full-time gig is sketching with a recognizable yellow fountain pen so that he can’t e…
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Today we venture into the Restaurant of Mistaken Orders located in Tokyo, Japan! We sit down with dementia specialist Teepa Snow to explore this unique concept, where genuine mistakes made by the waitstaff with dementia are embraced as part of the dining experience. Discover how this initiative challenges misconceptions about dementia and promotes …
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In this episode, we dive into the power of third places—those magical spots between work and home where connections are formed and communities thrive. Join us as we explore the decline of traditional community hubs like bowling alleys and the impact on social connections. Political scientist Robert Putnam's insights on the "bowling alone" phenomeno…
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In today's episode, we step into the world of dog-friendly places and uncover the benefits of sharing spaces with our four-legged friends. Join me as I chat with human-animal interaction expert, Dr. Sandra Barker, to dive into the practical and innovative strategies behind creating shared spaces for dogs and their owners. From neighborhood parks to…
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Join me on an inspiring adventure with mountain climber Benjamin Lieber as he takes us into the heart of the mountains and reveals the transformative power they hold. In this episode, Benjamin shares insights into how his life among the peaks has reshaped his perspective. From facing fears to climbing out of comfort zones, he delves into the triump…
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Welcome to the first episode of the 'Power of Places'. In this episode I dive into how one specific place changed my life and inspired the launch of this podcast. Then, environmental psychologist, Dr. Robert Gifford, joins me for an eye-opening conversation about the concept of place attachment and why certain places mean so much to us. We explore …
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Have you ever felt connected to a place? Well, it turns out that the places all around us hold more power than we think. I'm Julia Suca, your curious guide, with a love for coffee, travel, and psychology. In each episode, I chat with experts and explore all sorts places, from the ordinary to the downright bizarre. Together we’ll venture from the co…
  continue reading
 
On this episode of Reframeables, we are reframing rage with author Kathryn Mockler. She spoke with us about the despair of writing and editing climate justice work, and how she’s moved forward from rage and exchanged hurt for the earth for human connection. She calls it ‘post-hope,’ though instead of ‘hope,’ her preferred word is ‘possibility’ — a …
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This week, we are reframing fiction as truth-telling with novelist, playwright, and clothing line creator Claudia Dey. You’ll hear our conversation filled with so many truths born of fiction, creating constraints to create, and the companionship of language. We talk about Claudia’s newest novel Daughter, and Hamlet, and theatre school memories of C…
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Is reframing burnout even possible? According to Emilie Aries, the founder of Bossed Up, it is — sort of. Emilie is a speaker and author whose company is committed to closing the gender leadership gap. In this episode, you’ll hear our conversation about the systemic nature of burnout culture, particularly for women. We unpack “role overload,” try a…
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This week on Reframeables, we spoke with author Lisa Whittington-Hill about her new book Girls, Interrupted: How Pop Culture is Failing Women. With Lisa, we jumped right in with a discussion about female rage, considered the failings of media for middle age women and teenage girls, and shared some nostalgic memories of Courtney Love — who Lisa has …
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Pop culture is supposed to be light — downright breezy. Or, as we discovered in our conversation with celebrated Canadian author Jen Sookfong Lee, it can be something more: a bridge to navigating the complexities of intergenerational trauma, reckoning with one’s place in the world, and, perhaps most poignantly, facing the self. We hope you are able…
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This week we are reframing pop culture as self-care (or reframing the inside joke) with author R. Eric Thomas. In a wonderfully meandering conversation we talked about faith, office cake, gardening, hiking up (and then running down) mountains, looking to Oprah as a way to prepare for big feelings, and using Chekhov for life metaphors. Finally, we l…
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This week, we are reframing friendship — or more specifically, the friendship fail. To find out how a deep friendship has the potential to be rehabilitated, we talk with friendship expert Shasta Nelson, who has been called the Brené Brown of friendship. We talk about reframing loneliness, qualities every friendship needs, not downplaying our succes…
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This week, we are reframing vegetarian eating with food writer Alicia Kennedy. We talk all things vegetarian — politics, the meat industry, how food and relationships are connected, and (in Alicia's words) her desire to make vegetarian food both compelling and delicious. We walked away from this conversation with a lot of new ideas to chew on. Alic…
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We're joined by author L'Oreal Thompson Payton to reframe all things perfectionism — breaking streaks, embracing shitty first drafts, or learning to stop waiting for the right moment. We take a hard look at how our own perfectionist tendencies show up in ourselves, where this pressure comes from, and how it impacts others. L'Oreal also treats us to…
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This week, we are chatting with Vanity Fair contributing editor Leah Faye Cooper. We met Leah at South by Southwest, where she was facilitating a panel of influencers that went down the road of Botox and fillers and the external work one can do on oneself. That prompted us to ask Leah to come on Reframeables and talk about the more holistic work th…
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This week, we are talking all things momfluencers with author Sara Petersen whose new book Momfluenced comes out this month. We reminisce with Sara about some of our favourite momfluencers, and why they also irritate us. We discuss the weight mothers carry to perform a certain kind of motherhood online, and some examples of mom culture getting it r…
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We’ve gone back to the beginning dear Reframeables! Back to where it all began — because sometimes you have to look back to move forward. In this episode Nat and Bec introduce their “exceptional” details — who, what, where, including the frenemy relationship between their cats. Then they dive into some place-based memories that need reframing. For …
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We joined writer and chef Sang Kim for a conversation around reframing trauma. We were thrilled to get Sang's perspective as one who has lived life from so many different vantage points — there is so much here in this interview! We touch on the search for "home," crossovers between art forms, cooking as a source of joy, what it takes to be a great …
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While in Austin for South by Southwest, we're reframing the walking meeting. We're taking in the streets of East Austin, and working our way through big feelings (some brought on by messages out of the blue) — all at a brisk pace! Link: The Matinee episode with Nat We love hearing from our listeners! Leave us a voice message, write to the show emai…
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This week, we're examining missed moments because we're interested in reframing everything — even moments we've never had! For many of us, there's a temptation to get stuck in the feeling of "what if I had just done that differently..." We bring our reframing energy to an assortment of our own missed moments, in addition to ones from previous guest…
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We've all heard the adage "money talks." Well, today we're reframing how money talks, and how to change the kinds of conversations we have with it. With A.J. Schneider from Beyond the Green Coaching, we talk strategies, we talk budgeting, we talk money in relationships — and then she encourages us to go one step further and really dig deep into our…
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This week, in celebration of Black History Month, we are coming back to one of our favourite interviews with poet, essayist, and novelist Ian Williams, whose brain we really connected with. His book of essays, Disorientation: Being Black in the World, is thought-provoking and beautiful — all the things a book of essays should be. Ian Williams is th…
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We're here to reframe Valentine's Day with an episode that's short and sweet (because maybe you have chocolate to eat). Some people love the holiday, some folks hate it — we’re not opposed to what Valentine’s Day represents, but are definitely here for a new perspective on what it could mean! Is it just a sentimental “love day” or possibly a new ta…
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Today we're reframing how we talk about sex with kids with sex-positivity communicator Emily Roach — whose loyal and growing following on TikTok suggest that we're not the only ones looking for this conversation. We talk about creating spaces for judgement-free conversations, healing our own relationship to sex, and ways of speaking about consent. …
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Today we are chatting with author Jason Roeder, former senior editor and senior writer at The Onion. We get into his new book Griefstrike!, a hilarious how-to for getting through grief that features Grieving Visualization Power Postures (all beginning with standing nude in one's sunroom), grief archetypes, sincerity corners, and so much more. Jason…
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This week we feature a vulnerable conversation with actors and creators Heidi Lynch and Perrie Voss, who delve into amplifying underrepresented stories in their new web series Avocado Toast. Perrie shares with us about her mental health struggles and Heidi talks about impact of endometriosis and how their health struggles make their way into their …
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We're kicking off a new year of Reframeables with guests Juno Rinaldi and Jenny Young, who have launched new web series, My Special Guest. You might know them from other roles: Juno played Frankie for five years on the Emmy-nominated Netflix series Workin' Moms, and Jenny had a long time role on CBC's radio drama Afghanada and more recently on Amaz…
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Today we are reframing the holiday list. We're seeing lots of lists out there right now, most of them about getting people the perfect gift for Christmas and other winter holiday celebrations. Since we also like lists (we do biweekly lists for our Patreon subscribers — what we like to call Life Hacks and Enhancers), we thought we would make a holid…
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With author Marianne Apostolides we talk about her newest book I Can't Get You Out Of My Mind. This episode of Reframeables is the book launch she never got (thanks a lot, Covid!). The story is about Ariadne, a writer who is navigating a divorce, an affair with the arrogant Adam and two angry teenage children. As a way to make some extra money she …
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This week, we're looking back on our October challenges from episode 53 (no complaining, no saying sorry) and reframing our commitments to language and what we really mean when we set self-care goals. Yes, this is coming out of some failed attempts! Listen in as we take a deep dive into our 30-day challenges (that went off the rails) and how we're …
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Nat's done a lot of commuting in her days as a teacher, and certain voices on the radio always grabbed her attention on the long trek up the 400. One of those voices is the smart, understated voice of Chum 104.5's Caitlin Green, who is reframing her influencer life right now - off stage with a new baby. We sat down for a vulnerable conversation wit…
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