Episode 88: The Journey of Unlearning, Undoing, Adapting, and Unleashing her Core Identity

Dare To Share Your Untold Story

Fatima’s untold story is about being raised by her grandmother from 18 months, in Barbados after being born in Canada, and then returning to Canada at the age of 8, not knowing that her scheduled visit after so many years was going to become a permanent life change for her. She speaks about themes like navigating relationships, abandonment, grief, and loss, being stripped of everything that was familiar to her, learning to adapt to new situations, encountering racism that was not experienced back home, and connecting to her cultural identity. As Fatima grappled with learning who she was, she also had internal fears that she was unable to articulate, lots of self-doubt, poor self-confidence, feeling unworthiness and not feeling like she belonged. When uncovering her new way of life had become abundantly overwhelming, she found herself with a great deal of internal turmoil, with a great deal of emotional withdrawal, physically her legs would get shaky, and she had a deep desire to get back to Barbados in some way. Fatima shared that she felt quite misunderstood by her classmates, many times bullied, made fun of due to the differences in her accent and texture of her hair, and when she would rely on support from her teachers, she often didn’t receive it, and instead would often feel as though she was being punished. Through her experience, she learned to swallow suffering and bury it down, if she cried at home, she might get spanked, so it got to the point, where she suppressed all emotions that she felt, those that were undesired and desired. Her key message to the listeners is that: no matter where you are in life, age, or circumstances, there is hope; once you have hope you can climb and get over the wall; just love yourself perfectly and wonderfully; whatever you go through, there is a reason for it, so search for purpose and on the other side there’s hope.