Interview with Craig Bulmer on authenticity, understanding people and where the platypus was discovered (#3)

Candour Communication Podcast

1:24 - where the platypus was discovered.

4:22 - if you want to connect you have to think of the other person.

5:56 - being present to connect with people.

9:08 - being vulnerable is about being real without the facade.

11:18 - it takes courage to go first.

12:28 - why we're scared to show our true selves.

14:33 - why take the risk to be vulnerable?

15:51 - performing for approval makes you less likeable.

17:01 - finding the balance between technique and authenticity.

18:44 - why people are important.

19:15 - silo mentality.

19:49 - the right people in the right role.

21:01 - What is DiSC?

25:15 - building rapport.

27:24 - using DiSC and technology to understand people and build relationship.

29:26 - it's important to be aware of each other's style, especially under stress.

29:59 - under stress people resort to comfortable behaviours because of fear.

31:09 - rapport building techniques can be manipulative.

32:51 - it's not about technique, it's about trust.

33:02 - humour is a good technique to build rapport.

34:04 - how to build trust. Is trust given or earned?

36:33 - don't fight resistance, adapt to it.

37:14 - meeting people where they are at.

38:58 - intellectual vs emotional empathy.

40:28 - how stress changes behaviour and impacts empathy.

42:24 - making decisions based on what we want, not what they need.

43:19 - tension between our desires and others' needs.

45:15 - incredibly proud of achievements, but it nearly cost the relationship.

46:00 - re-investing in strained relationships.

48:20 - what we're praised for is often not what's important.

51:21 - selfishness does not make you happy.

52:01 - productive conflict.

52:42 - separating ego from conflicts.

55:02 - what makes us happy.

55:55 - be aware of your own triggers.

56:57 - emotional intelligence is counter-intuitive.

57:58 - excuses for bad behaviour.

59:54 - personal responsibility.

62:58 - expecting people to do things they are not capable of.

64:18 - being a good performer does not make them a good leader - but we promote them anyway.

65:25 - rewarding people for being the best at what they do.

67:37 - you need to understand your people and what drives them.

68:11 - understanding people helps you to better utilise their strengths.

71:46 - last words.

More detailed show notes can be found at https://candourpodcast.com/craig-bulmer