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Candour Communication Podcast

Mark Tannen, Divan Gradwell

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We discuss interpersonal communication and all the human stuff that gets in the way. To communicate more effectively we cannot rely on communication skills alone. We need to shine a light on our perceptions of other people and ourselves. We delve into topics like emotional intelligence, body language, deception, storytelling, social engineering, culture, personality, negotiation, sales and leadership. Join us as we learn to get our message across with more courage, clarity and connection.
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show series
 
1:04- behind the scenes: podcast stats - number of countries, downloads and fan favourite episodes. 6:11 - We're putting the podcast on hold indefinitely. 9:54 - Mark's favourite episode: Chris Marhefka. 14:38 - Adrian Spear episode: distance between stimulus and response. 15:39 - Grant Herbert episode: be yourself. 16:13 - funniest moments: Lisa L…
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1:33 - being present rather than prepared. 4:26 - the moments that happen when we're present. 6:04 - being in the moment allows you to interact with your audience. 7:56 - does the costume help to lower inhibitions? 9:43 - curiosity, empathy and naivete. 11:28 - training yourself to see as if it was your first time seeing. 14:00 - how did clowning s…
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1:21 - the first person to disagree on LinkedIn. 5:20 - the countries Florian has lived in. 7:18 - most difficult country to adapt to. 9:17 - are people less friendly in some countries? 12:32 - some cultures are more indirect. 14:36 - how to get an insight to the country’s unwritten rules. 16:30 - how Florian felt about going to a boarding school i…
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2:43 - no fear of public speaking after doing a body building competition. 8:38 - focus on who you want to be, not what you want to be. 15:33 - people are not trusted to do the job they were hired for. 16:26 - being trusted is not up to you to decide, its up to the other person. 17:36 - why Melanie wrote the book, Trust. 20:37 - respect comes from …
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2:10 - Alexander Hamilton. 5:02 - what drew Laurie into criminal law? 10:26 - the most important lessons Laurie's father taught her was about communication. 11:55 - importance of credibility when making your case. 14:18 - logic vs emotion in arguing a case. 17:32 - the importance of primacy: making the most of an opening statement. 23:53 - knowing …
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1:31 - Radical Candor in the Rosoff household. 2:08 - what drew Jillian to grief counselling. 4:30 - people are scared to talk about death. 7:06 - what to say when someone is grieving. 9:47 - we will all say the wrong thing at some point. 10:50 - people get less support during grief than we think. 12:25 - avoiding resentment when people don't reach…
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2:05 - what drew Ryan to work at a call centre for the police. 4:28 - lessons from a emergency call centre. 6:45 - hire for character and social skills. 7:55 - de-escalating highly emotional situations. 10:17 - the hardest phone call Ryan ever took. 12:02 - importance of self-care in high stress jobs. 16:06 - managing your own emotions in high stre…
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1:53 - phantom phone vibrations. 2:35 - from development psychology to technology impact on relationships. 3:53 - is technology helpful or harmful to relationships? 7:24 - parents' concerns about kids on technology. 9:06 - technology opens up communication with people across the world. 9:47 - phone addiction is not all bad. 11:07 - using our phones…
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1:39 - from enemies to best mates. 6:12 - there is nothing noble about being harmless. 7:06 - avoiding or engaging with conflict. 7:27 - what makes a leader? 8:50 - good leadership looks different in different contexts. 11:40 - the leadership style in the military. 12:59 - how values and beliefs impact team performance. 15:12 - navigating the confl…
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2:28 - how Cheri and Jackie first came across the idea of Appreciative Inquiry. 4:04 - how many hours in a day are you in conversation? 4:32 - what is appreciative inquiry. 5:34 - difference between a good and a bad conversation. 7:18 - you can feel when you are in a destructive, depreciative conversation. 7:42 - how many of our conversations can b…
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2:09 - how do people respond when Amanda introduces herself at a networking event. 3:52 - scared of talking about sex. 5:06 - how Amanda's journey into erotic empathy started. 6:43 - what is erotic empathy. 7:47 - we push our partner away because of the way we feel about ourselves. 8:57 - not being judgemental about your partner's sexual preference…
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2:40 - what attracted Ricardo to the topic of belonging. 4:06 - Diversity and inclusion should have its foundation on belonging. 5:52 - why belonging is more powerful than inclusion. 7:46 - diversity and belonging. 8:44 - what constitutes a culture? 9:20 - cognitive diversity. 9:41 - should all people to all groups? 10:41 - why a team needs a stron…
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3:06 - life is abundant. 6:26 - MBA consultant who turned to acting. 9:50 - pursuing the path less travelled led to more admiration than judgement. 12:07 - acting started from a young age. 13:15 - managing your energy when you need to be "on" in front of people. 15:40 - my best is different at every moment. 17:56 - it's impossible to do it all. 19:…
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2:18 - A sports coach who makes you push further than you thought possible. 4:19 - pushing people to perform better without being a dictator. 8:10 - getting better at leading yourself and others under pressure. 13:38 - managing stress. 15:43 - how to break free from stress. 18:50 - stress reaction is not useful. 20:51 - how can we change our habits…
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2:39 - first impressions about Danish culture. 6:24 - after reading hundreds of parenting books, Jessica still preferred the advice from her Danish family. 8:13 - the birth of the book. 9:49 - our default setting for parenting. 12:7 - authoritarian vs authoritative style of parenting. 15:7 - free play is better than structured activities for kids. …
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00:01:35 – welcome Jason Rosoff from Radical Candor. 00:02:19 – the feedback Jason got about his thinking face. 00:05:37 – why is it important to give feedback? 00:07:06 – challenging the importance of feedback: discussion on The Feedback Fallacy published by the Harvard Business Review. 00:13:01 – what is Radical Candor? 00:19:18 – feedback does n…
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00:01:35 – endurance sport. 00:05:04 – Running is meditative. 00:06:50 – the life events that motivated David to start endurance sports. 00:08:50 – the importance of caring for yourself first instead of impressing people all the time. 00:11:03 – adversity can make you better or it can make you bitter. 00:13:56 – I have to vs I get to. 00:16:55 – re…
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2:05 - book recommendations from someone who read over 200 books on business and personal development. 4:47 -want to impact your business, family or community? Be the light. 6:12 - reading addiction. Did reading more books help you to grow? 10:33 - why is it so hard to sustain a change in habit? 14:39 – does willpower and discipline work to change …
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2:19 - what drew Dr Healy to study bullying? 4:18 - the difference between bullying and teasing. 6:30 - hurtful comments can be innocent or intentional. 8:40 - teasing can actually be relationship building. 10:32 - is bullying more prevalent now? 11:23 - is bullying getting worse or are we more sensitive now? 12:41 - effects of bullying. 15:46 - th…
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3:20 - are you allowed to talk about stories at home? 5:50 - why is story so important to Francisco. 8:55 - can you remember the story you told? 10:57 - does the audience remember the story? 12:25 - homework for life. 13:41 - path to making storytelling a profession. 18:35 - impact kids had on Francisco's speaking career. 22:32 - Is content or deli…
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You can learn more about your hosts, Mark and Divan, at: https://candourpodcast.com/about/your-hosts. 0:00:28 - influencing people who don't report to me: from Bonus Episode "Mark and Divan on why interpersonal communication matters" . 0:00:35 – I thought that was it: from Bonus Episode "Mark and Divan on why interpersonal communication matters". 0…
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2:52 - is it normal to smile when you see a video of someone smiling? 4:14 - mirror neurons (see video clip). 7:57 - how to be the baby whisperer. 9:03 - the hardware and software of empathy. 12:51 - empathy is not standing in someone else's shoes. 17:45 - empathy is a capacity. 20:17 - empathy is a tool. It's not good or bad. 23:08 - empathy is no…
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1:34 - what drew Belinda to HR. 3:17 - what people skills did the mentor notice? 4:58 - where did love for people come from? 6:37 - connecting with people who are not like you. 10:12 - HR doesn't manage people but they have to influence. 12:41 - hiring the right people. 16:32 - getting to know your people. 21:25 - what makes good leadership. 26:51 …
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1:57 - background in mathematics, banking and insurance. 5:35 - some factors were missing. 9:27 - what factors made the difference? 11:30 - how to convince sceptics of value of people skills. 17:58 - what non-profits teaches about motivation and leadership. 23:27 - why did empathy stand out as a skill? 26:34 - judgement and assumptions. 28:46 - how…
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1:50 - drawn to interpersonal communication because it was so broad. 3:01 - communication applied to organ donation conversations. 4:55 - communication needs to be audience-centred. 6:22 - your audience can have very diverse beliefs and opinions. 7:47 - you are not your audience. 11:24 - how shows like Greys Anatomy shapes perception about organ do…
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00:01:58 – wanted to be an actor from a young age. 00:04:04 – the art of acting vs the appeal of being famous. 00:06:58 – acting develops empathy and other soft skills. 00:10:58 – dealing with big personalities. 00:13:50 – most actors are introverts. 00:17:08 – most important skills for good acting. 00:23:44 – how to use the actor's toolkit at netw…
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2:27 - Using "busy" to describe how you are doing. 4:28 - are we really more busy now? 7:18 - is obsession with busy cross-cultural? 8:27 - impact of COVID on being busy. 11:40 - addicted to busy. 14:01 - sleep is usually sacrificed when we feel busy. 15:58 - what are we busy doing? 17:48 - shifting our mindset from efficient to effective. 22:06 - …
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2:32 - Daisy grew up introverted and socially awkward. 4:31 - how Daisy came out of her shell. 6:22 - how Daisy coped with initial. 7:35 - learning about yourself vs putting yourself out there. 8:10 - people skills crash course/overcoming fear of phone calls. 10:05 - how to define introversion. 12:07 - personality tests. 13:48 - labels of introvert…
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2:16 - NATO. 6:54 - what NATO looks for in candidates. 10:01 - what is social engineering. 10:30 - how to get a free business class upgrade. 13:28 - can you learn social engineering? 15:53 - separate the behaviour from the person. 17:54 - observations instead of value judgements. 22:15 - how emotional intelligence relates to cybersecurity 30:03 - w…
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02:04 - role of sport in Christian's life. 07:21 - rejected for sports journalism. 09:13 - pursued career at Nike. 13:48 - was is a dream come true in reality? 18:34 - Am I giving up or is this the right time for me? 22:39 - impact of a good manager. 24:54 - being authentic. 26:48 - fear of failure (and startups). 36:38 - feeling light to guide you…
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2:20 - be aware of how your actions impact your brand. 4:02 - what is brand storytelling? 5:21 - do people perceive us in the way we want to come across? 10:46 - stories give depth and meaning to what you stand for. 13:04 - we remember stories better than facts. 17:22 - why emotion is important in business. 20:52 - stories motivate people more than…
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2:06 - what is mediation? 5:00 - misaligned interests aren't always the problem. 7:30 - what drives Catherine to do mediation. 9:50 - examples of mediation. 14:11 - getting sceptics to buy in. 17:28 - building rapport and trust. 18:30 - managing your own emotions. 21:44 - empathy vs ruinous empathy. 30:07 - negotiation and tactical empathy. 33:35 -…
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In this episode we discuss topics like depression, alcoholism, eating disorders and suicide. This conversation is not for little ears and if these topics may be triggers for you, please use your discretion. 1:42 - normal childhood until mental health issues started. 6:48 - coping with depression and bulimia 7:47 - responding as a parent. 11:48 - al…
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2:54 - why should everyone care about sales? 4:06 - Too honest to be in sales? 6:16 - difference between manipulation and influence. 8:05 - who you are is more important than what you do. 9:55 - success at home and at work requires making the right choices. 15:50 - money did not make Steve happy. 18:05 - approach to parenting that led to close rela…
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1:59 - transition into first leadership role. 4:19 - collaborative vs dictatorial leadership style. 5:45 - being promoted above peers. 7:9 - impact of retreat on strained relationship. 13:19 - importance of being aligned with goals 22:45 - giving feedback. 27:50 - gaslighting. dealing with people who deny making mistakes. 31:10 - encouraging open c…
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2:03 - Being a HOT human. 2:57 - being honest and avoiding sugar coating. 5:18 - actions speak louder than words. 6:48 - perfectionism gets in the way of being a HOT human. 10:02 - being real. 15:00 - navigating shame and disappointed expectations. 17:31 - build character not perfection. 19:53 - improving communication is essential for marriage. 23…
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2:00 - stood out as a cricketer because of hard work. 3:15 - pushing through the pain to succeed. 5:01 - the answer is not working harder and longer. 8:39 - how rhythm effect impacts relationships. 12:05 - energy and time wasted through in-fighting. 12:41 - unexpected effect of resentment. 16:06 - leadership as a technical skill. 19:37 - process fo…
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3:15 - the importance of interpersonal communication. 6:38 - causes of breakdowns in communication. 8:58 - how a student challenged Dr Levine's thinking on deception. 14:34 - the value of being open-minded and humble. 16:36 - how good are we at telling lies? 18:37 - why are we not better at spotting lies? 20:07 - being truth biased is helpful. 21:0…
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2:02 - my mum will be glad that we're having this conversation! 3:00 - why is speech pathology exciting? 4:14 - who can benefit from speech pathology? 5:51 - what a speech pathologist does. 9:13 - using your voice safely. 14:54 - how speech pathology helps with listening and understanding. 15:57 - people are struggling more and more with auditory p…
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3:23 - why teach companies about trust? 8:19 - distrust in management seems common. 9:19 - organisations who resist learning about trust usually have trust issues. 10:23 - weird trust lady. 12:41 - winning over the sceptics. 14:32 - weird trust lady vs trust expert. 15:50 - effect of vulnerability on trust. 18:50 - you cannot be vulnerable in front…
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2:30 - how Greg got into martial arts. 3:30 - how Bob Paris inspired Greg to become the National Body Building champion. 5:04 - we don't have to be limited by what people say about us. 6:14 - the example we set can change lives. 6:30 - Greg's grandfather won the Military Medal in WWI. 7:08 - the remarkable example Greg's grandmother set. 8:48 - the…
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2:12 - started as a nuclear engineer. 3:14 - Ev's mission is to do all I can to promote forgiveness in every willing heart, home and homeland. 4:16 - why is forgiveness so important to you? 6:01 - why is forgiveness so hard? 8:05 - what causes hurt. 9:28 - what is justice. 10:07 - both revenge and reconciliation is required for survival. 11:00 - th…
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2:33 - why transition from Fortune 500 executive to research? 3:17 - relationships were the secret sauce in success. 4:22 - initial interest was in anxiety in the workplace. 4:54 - came across curiosity while studying mindfulness. 5:51 - what is curiosity? 6:56 - curiosity gives psychological, emotional and social flexibility. 7:53 - not "if" but "…
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1:54 - Ola. 2:14 - growing up in a bicultural home. 3:48 - 26 siblings! 4:13 - identity and identification. 5:28 - finding purpose in the pain. 9:35 - cultural identity crisis. 10:58 - what culture is and how it forms us. 11:42 - culture is. 13:06 - 5 components of culture. 13:20 - everyone got to where they are at honestly. 14:03 - where food fits…
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2:18 - fear of public speaking to TEDx coach. 6:14 - public speaking anxiety. 7:37 - becoming a keen observer. 8:22 - impact of art on observation. 10:31 - nuances of facial expressions. 11:46 - hardest part of non-verbal communication is observation. 12:04 - the face gives so much information. 13:56 - being on to observe takes a lot of energy. 15:…
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2:14 - why ideas are important. 3:19 - ideas can die when not communicated well. 4:32 - impact of cognitive load on communication. 5:46 - less is often better. 7:05 - know your audience's world. 7:55 - using inclusive language. 9:36 - meeting the audience where they are at. 9:57 - Port method pitch formula. 12:32 - death by detail. 13:06 - Matt Chu…
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Tina has two decades of experience working with children including children with disabilities and trauma. She is passionate about developing the social and emotional skill of children that will prepare them for school and for life. She believes that play forms a vital part of this development and that play is an undervalued skill not just in childr…
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1:27 - surfing. 2:46 - mental rehearsal. 4:59 - study on impact of visualisation on strength. 6:18 - What is mindfulness? 7:47 - the benefits of mindfulness. 8:14 - mindfulness = managing the mind. 9:36 - being present is becoming increasingly harder. 10:58 - active and mindful listening. 12:04 - difference between mindful and active listening. 15:…
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1:24 - where the platypus was discovered. 4:22 - if you want to connect you have to think of the other person. 5:56 - being present to connect with people. 9:08 - being vulnerable is about being real without the facade. 11:18 - it takes courage to go first. 12:28 - why we're scared to show our true selves. 14:33 - why take the risk to be vulnerable…
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1:14 - welcome. 1:21 - first impressions. 8:18 - what Marco loves about recruitment. 9:15 - weak handshakes. 10:03 - handshakes. 10:22 - non verbals. 10:54 - when does the interview start? 13:49 - how to see someone's true character. 14:16 - dress code. 15:27 - how do I know what the dress code should be? 17:18 - is there a way back from a bad firs…
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