8. Chinese Moms: From Confucianism to IUDs

Shit We Don't Tell Mom

This episode is all about our Chinese moms: their stories, our mother-daughter relationships, and the ever uncomfortable shit when we try to talk with them.

Highlights:

• Angie reconciles the disrespect she had for her parents
• Kristy shares her mom’s story about coming to Canada
• Physical vs Emotional boundaries with our mothers
• Short term vs. long term pain in relationships
• Our moms are having more sex than we are

Takeaway:

• Physical boundaries can be very helpful in maintaining healthy relationships. But it’s also an easy way to avoid having uncomfortable talks about emotional boundaries. It’s time to get uncomfortable.
• Concepts of filial piety are more universal than we may think.
• If you have the privilege, ask your family about their immigration story.
• Sometimes we just need to rip the bandaid off. Which area in life are you using a bandaid?
• Go on a friend date with your mom.

Resources:

• Twitter: Tony Lin @tony_zy
• All Is Well (TV Drama)
• The Empty Nest Companion by Susan Gross and Briget Bishop (Book)
• The Joy Luck Club by Amy Tan (Book)
• What is Reparenting and How To Begin (Article)

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