The Place We Find Ourselves podcast features private practice therapist Adam Young (LCSW, MDiv) and interview guests as they discuss all things related to story, trauma, attachment, and interpersonal neurobiology. Listen in as Adam unpacks how trauma and abuse impact the heart and mind, as well as how to navigate the path toward healing, wholeness, and restoration. Interview episodes give you a sacred glimpse into the real-life stories of guests who have engaged their own experiences of trau ...
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Join parenting coach and mom-in-the-trenches, Penny Williams, as she helps parents, caregivers, and educators harness the realization that we are all beautifully complex and marvelously imperfect. Each week she delivers insights and actionable strategies on parenting and educating neurodivergent kids — those with ADHD, autism, anxiety, learning disabilities... Her approach to decoding behavior while honoring neurodiversity, and parenting the individual child you have will provide you with th ...
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279: You Might Also Like: In It: Raising Kids who Learn Differently, from Understood.org
28:20
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This episode is a special collaboration with the "In It" podcast from Understood.org, dedicated to families with children facing challenges like ADHD and dyslexia. We’re diving into a topic that many parents find both essential and perplexing — encouraging kids to care about personal hygiene. In It hosts, Gretchen Vierstra and Rachel Bozek, are joi…
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278: Helping Kids on the Spectrum Transition to Adulthood, with Shannon Urquiola
32:39
32:39
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Navigating the transition to adulthood with your neurodivergent child can be overwhelming and fraught with uncertainties. In this episode of Beautifully Complex, my guest, Shannon Urquiola and I explore the critical aspects of preparing kids on the spectrum for adulthood, addressing common pain points like guardianship, financial planning, SSI, and…
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277: Redefining ADHD for Neurodivergent Kids, with Elly Both
27:08
27:08
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Are you struggling to talk to your child about their ADHD diagnosis or seeking ways to reframe it positively? In this episode of Beautifully Complex, I host an empowering conversation with Elly Both about her inspiring new children's book on ADHD. Elly shares her personal journey of being diagnosed later in life and how that revelation transformed …
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276: Executive Function Rundown, with Seth Perler, M.Ed.
32:44
32:44
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Feeling frustrated by your child's disorganization, falling grades, and struggles with time management? Tune in to this episode of Beautifully Complex, where Seth Perler, M.Ed. and I explore the crucial role of executive function skills in your child or teen's life. Seth likens these skills to learning guitar chords — they're not innate, but they c…
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275: Starting Scared, with Chrysty Lockhart
31:40
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Are you tired of letting fear hold you back? The key to moving beyond that is turning what you view as failure into stepping stones to success. And you can teach your kids the same. In this episode of Beautifully Complex, I’m joined by Chrysty Lockhart, who shares her transformative journey from fearful to learning to push forward despite the fear.…
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160 The Weight of Religious and Spiritual Expectations with Reid Zeller
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I am joined today by therapist and friend Reid Zeller who shares a story about egging cars when he was 16. Behind every story is a backstory. The backstory includes the nature of the environment we grew up in. When religious or spiritual expectations are placed on the shoulders of a child, pressure builds within that child. And when that pressure i…
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274 Looking at Behavior Both Inside and Out, with Gabriele Nicolet, MA, CCC-SLP
47:07
47:07
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Do you find it challenging to stay calm and mindful when your child is having a tough time in public? Gabriele Nicolet and I explore understanding kid’s behavior from both behavioral and neurophysiological perspectives. Gabriele, a seasoned speech therapist and parent coach, shares invaluable insights into decoding what behaviors signify about a ki…
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273: Getting Stuck in a Loop with Sarah Wayland, Ph.D.
42:32
42:32
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Have you ever felt helpless as your child gets stuck in repetitive behaviors or meltdowns, leaving you wondering how to help them break free? In this episode of Beautifully Complex, I sit down with Sarah Wayland, Ph.D., to delve into the struggles and complexities faced by parents and kids, teens, and young adults when dealing with looped behaviors…
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159 Revisiting the Big Six: What You Needed from Your Parents
41:34
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When you were a child, you were deeply dependent on your primary caretakers. This means that the development of your brain was contingent upon the level of care and kindness in your family environment. Today I identify the six things you needed from your parents, and give examples of each. The “Big Six” things you needed from your parents include (…
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272: What Does Anger Tell Us?, with Dr. Lori Desautels
27:41
27:41
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Do you often find yourself misinterpreting anger in your neurodivergent child, escalating situations unintentionally? Join me and Dr. Lori Desautels as we dive deep into understanding anger and what it truly signifies. Dr. Desautels, an expert in applied educational neuroscience, explains that anger often stems from a dysregulated nervous system, f…
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158 The Critical Relationship Between Attachment and Affect Regulation
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If you have difficulty regulating your emotion, there is a reason for that! No one comes out of the womb with the ability to regulate their affect. The way you develop the neurobiological structures to regulate your own emotions is by having your affect interactively regulated by another. This is the main gift that a primary caregiver gives to a ch…
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271: ADHD and Dads: Creating the Fatherhood You Crave, Larry Hagner
49:23
49:23
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Struggling to connect with your child who has ADHD can be incredibly challenging, leaving you feeling helpless and overwhelmed. In this insightful episode of Beautifully Complex (first aired 2020), I’m joined by Larry Hagner, founder of the Dad Edge podcast and father of four boys, to explore how dads can create the fatherhood they crave. Larry div…
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270: 3 Steps to Empower Confidence in Your Teen, with Kristi Simons
31:17
31:17
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31:17
Feeling like your teen or young adult is struggling to find their confidence and navigate the ups and downs of life? In this episode of Beautifully Complex, I sit down with teen life coach, Kristi Simons, to provide strategies to empower confidence in your teen. Kristi delves into the importance of allowing your teen to experience their own emotion…
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157 What If My Story Isn’t That Bad? Why We All Tend to Minimize Our Wounds
29:24
29:24
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This episode is for people who experience emotional pain but feel like “nothing that bad happened to me growing up. I had a pretty good childhood.” As it says in Jeremiah 6, it is very common to dress our wounds as though they are not serious. One way we tend to minimize our wounds is by comparing our story to someone else who “had it worse.” Anoth…
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269: Reclaiming Community: Climate, Parenting, and Social Connections, with Bill Weir
33:15
33:15
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We’ve all but outright rejected the old adage, “It takes a village to raise a child,” in American culture. We’re more fragmented and lonely than ever. Yet, there’s clear evidence that community and connection are key to happiness. It certainly takes a community to raise a happy and resilient child, even if “community” looks different in modern life…
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268: What to Do When Importance Doesn’t Create Motivation, with Penny Williams
19:45
19:45
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In this episode of Beautifully Complex, we’re examining a topic that really hits close to home for many of us — what to do when importance doesn’t create motivation, especially for our neurodivergent kids. I know firsthand how challenging it can be to get our kids started and keep them going on tasks that matter, but don’t necessarily excite them. …
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156 Five Objections to Engaging Your Story: A Response
40:35
40:35
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When I began exploring my story, five objections kept coming up for me. These objections kept me stuck. In today’s episode, I respond to each of the five objections. Objection 1: I should focus on the present and the future, not "dwell on the past.” Objection 2: Looking at my story is self-indulgent, introspective navel gazing; I should be focused …
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267: The Myth of Laziness, with Adam Price, Ph.D.
22:51
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Today, I'm so excited to be talking with Dr. Adam Price, a nationally known clinical psychologist and best-selling author with over 30 years of experience working with kids and adults. He's the author of "He's Not Lazy: Empowering Your Son to Believe in Himself" and "The He's Not Lazy Guide to Better Grades and a Great Life." In this episode, we’re…
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266: A Summertime Plan that Can Work for Everyone, with Penny Williams
23:46
23:46
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In this episode of Beautifully Complex, we’re focusing on making summertime rewarding and manageable for neurodiverse families. I’ll guide you through a summer plan that encompasses structured activities, personal growth, and meaningful connections. This episode is packed with strategies starting with how to create an adaptable visual plan using to…
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155 Why Engaging Your Story Heals Your Brain
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My invitation to you today is simple: to take your story seriously. Engaging your story is the single most important thing you can do to experience healing. When I say "your story," I'm talking more about the individual scenes than the overarching narrative of your life. Your stories—particularly your stories of heartache or harm—have shaped your b…
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265: Strategies for Young Autistic Learners, with Tara Phillips, SLP
36:24
36:24
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In this episode, I’m joined by Tara Phillips, speech language pathologist and founder of Autism Little Learners. She shares some transformative tools and techniques which have significantly benefited her students, such as the use of visual supports and predictable routines. Together, Tara and I explore the importance of positive connections and a s…
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264: Handling Behavior Struggles with Dignity, with Wendy Snyder
28:11
28:11
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This time on Beautifully Complex, I'm exploring behavior struggles and conscious discipline with my guest, Wendy Snyder, a positive parenting educator and family life coach. We discuss how understanding behaviors as communication changes our perspective, helping us view challenges as signals of need and teaching opportunities. Join us as we dive in…
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154 What Grief Is, How It Heals, and the Pain of Loneliness with J.S. Park
45:35
45:35
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In “As Long As You Need,” author J.S. Park writes that “Grief is not about letting go, but about letting in.” Letting in sorrow, letting in anger, and especially letting in other people who can be WITH us in our pain. This episode is about all kinds of grief—not merely the grief of losing a loved one. One of Joon Park’s main points is that we often…
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263: Understood Explains IEPs from Understood.org
16:00
16:00
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16:00
The terms IEP and 504 plan may come up a lot when you’re looking into special education for your child. These school supports do some of the same things, but one can provide more services and the other is easier to get. And it’s important to know the differences in order to get your child the support they need. On this episode of Beautifully Comple…
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262: Emotional Support Animals, with Dan Maigler, LCSW
27:18
27:18
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In this episode, I'm chatting with my guest Daniel Maigler, about the transformative roles of emotional support animals. Dan's insights as a social worker and mental health advisor for Paws for Patrick reveal how emotional support animals can aid those facing mental health challenges. Dan shares the poignant story behind Paws for Patrick, emphasizi…
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261: Extreme Language Around Emotions, with Penny Williams
15:31
15:31
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In this episode of Beautifully Complex, I tackle why our kids and teens might use extreme language to express their emotions. We're recognizing that expressions like "I hate you" or phrases that include aggression or violence often aren't literal but signal an inability to articulate complex emotions. I talk about the importance of distinguishing b…
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259: Insights on Bullying: Understanding Aggression, Building Resilience, with Brooks Gibbs, Ph.D.
29:35
29:35
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Brooks Gibbs, Ph.D. is joining me for a conversation on Insights on Bullying: Understanding Aggression, Building Resilience. His expertise in social psychology shines a light on the intricate dance between aggression and resilience — especially in the lives of our neurodivergent kids. In this episode, you'll hear stories close to my heart, includin…
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260: Navigating Life Challenges with Purpose and Progress (not perfection), with Shari Leid
31:46
31:46
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In this episode of Beautifully Complex, I have the pleasure of talking with Shari Leid of An Imperfectly Perfect Life. Together, we’re talking about purposeful living and parenting and celebrating gradual progress over the pursuit of perfection. Shari shares her deep insights on the value of recognizing and fostering the inherent strengths in our c…
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153 How Your Past Story Affects Your Present Sexuality with Jay Stringer
50:28
50:28
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I am joined today by author Jay Stringer to talk about sexual stuckness/difficulties/pain. Healthy sexuality is deeply tied to the degree to which we have made sense of our story in our family of origin. Sadly, so few of us have ever been asked to connect the dots between our past life story and the sexual difficulties we face in the present. Today…
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258: What to Do When Your Kid Isn’t Listening, with Penny Williams
16:07
16:07
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Let's talk about what to do when your kid isn't listening. Remember, they might be processing your words in non-traditional ways, so it's important to find alternative approaches to help them focus, process, and follow through. From recognizing distractions to accommodating slow processing speeds, I offer practical advice to help parents navigate t…
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257: The Control Trap, with Penny Williams
26:12
26:12
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In this episode of Beautifully Complex, I explore the detrimental effects of trying to control kids, emphasizing the importance of a humanistic approach to behavior. After watching the recent documentary series on Netflix called "The Program," I was both horrified by the trauma that the “troubled teen industry” causes and inspired to talk about the…
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256: Breaking Down Motivation: Helping Teens and Young Adults Find Their Path to Success, with Melanie McNally, Psy.D.
28:22
28:22
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28:22
In this episode of the Beautifully Complex podcast, I sit down with Dr. Melanie McNally, a clinical psychologist and brain coach who specializes in working with tweens, teens, and young adults. Together, we explore the struggles that many young adults face in finding motivation and direction. Dr. Melanie shares her expertise on helping young adults…
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255: 7 Steps to Help Kids & Teens with Rejection Sensitive Dysphoria, with Penny Williams
20:17
20:17
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In this episode of the Beautifully Complex podcast, I tackle the topic of rejection sensitive dysphoria (RSD) and provide 7 essential steps to help kids and teens facing this challenge. I share insights on recognizing signs of RSD in kids and teens, fostering open communication, building self-esteem, challenging negative thought patterns, teaching …
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254: How to Be a Neuro-Affirming Parent or Teacher, with Emily Kircher-Morris, M.A., M.ED., LPC
35:19
35:19
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In today's episode, Emily Kircher-Morris, M.A., M.ED., LPC is back and we're unpacking what it means to be a neuro-affirmative parent or teacher. We explore the pressures that neurodivergent kids face, especially the expectation to camouflage their true selves. Emily, with her dual expertise in education and counseling, is sharing invaluable insigh…
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253: Beyond the Power Struggles, with Richard Selznick, Ph.D.
27:42
27:42
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27:42
Today, I get to talk to the incredible Dr. Richard Selznick—a renowned psychologist specializing in dyslexia and learning disabilities. We dive into the traps parents often fall into when communicating with their children, especially those with neurodivergent needs. Dr. Selznick emphasizes the importance of giving our kids choices. It's eye-opening…
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152 Learning To Live Inside Your Body with Dr. Hillary McBride
39:22
39:22
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I am joined today by Dr. Hillary McBride to discuss excerpts from her new book titled, “Practices for Embodied Living.” Topics covered include: how to feel your feelings, being alive in your body (eroticism), and the story of your relationship to your sensuality and sexuality. Finally, I ask Hillary about her beautiful claim that we often find the …
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252: Transforming Behavior: When You Know Better You Do Better, with Penny Williams
30:14
30:14
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In this episode of Beautifully Complex, I’m sharing a deeply personal story about a challenging experience with my son and the valuable insights it brought us regarding challenging behavior and supporting our neurodivergent kids. Through sharing this experience, I emphasize the need for flexibility and understanding in dealing with challenging beha…
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251: Impact of Parental Confidence and Social Pressure on Parenting Complex Kids, with Anouk Briere-Godbout
32:58
32:58
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32:58
In this episode of Beautifully Complex, I have a candid conversation with Anouk Briere-Godbout about the challenges of parenting neurodivergent children. Our discussion focuses on the impact of societal pressure on parental confidence and the importance of finding supportive communities for parents facing similar struggles. Anouk shares personal ex…
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250: Recognizing Children's Unique Love Languages, with Emily Hamblin
32:49
32:49
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In this episode of Beautifully Complex, I’m talking with Emily Hamblin about the unique ways neurodivergent kids might show their love for you. Emily shares her personal journey of recognizing and appreciating her children's unique love languages, discussing the impact of neurodivergent traits on their communication of love and care. The conversati…
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151 What To Do With Desire and Dread with Mike Boland
41:02
41:02
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Pastor and counselor Mike Boland shares a story from when he was 15 years old. It’s a story about the interplay of longing for connection and, at the same time, dreading what will be required of him in return. We talk about grooming, and the war of ambivalence that rages in one’s body in the midst of abuse. You can find out more about Mike’s work a…
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