Best Jay Stringer Podcasts (2024)

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153 How Your Past Story Affects Your Present Sexuality with Jay Stringer 50:28

24d ago50:28

50:28

I am joined today by author Jay Stringer to talk about sexual stuckness/difficulties/pain. Healthy sexuality is deeply tied to the degree to which we have made sense of our story in our family of origin. Sadly, so few of us have ever been asked to connect the dots between our past life story and the sexual difficulties we face in the present. Today…

1
Episode 230: Why Evangelical Honeymoons Go So Badly feat. Jay Stringer 56:45

21d ago56:45

56:45

Recently Texas SBC megachurch pastor Josh Howerton told brides that on the wedding night, they should "stand where he wants you to stand, wear what he wants you to wear, and do what he wants you to do." Sex was presented as something that HE has been waiting for his whole life, and that she has to provide. There was no emphasis on how she actually …

1
Episode 234: Pastors' Wives Spill the Tea on Church Life 1:06:54

18m ago1:06:54

1:06:54

Today we have some special guests on, the lovely ladies from Pastors’ Wives Tell All! This is not the first time I’ve been on a podcast with them, but usually it’s theirs. So this time they are joining me on my show to discuss the topic of their upcoming book, Pastor’s Wives Tell All: Navigating real church life with honesty and humour. And surpris…

1
Story Work For Men Outgrowing Porn: How To Write A Story (Part 3) 42:22

2h ago42:22

42:22

How do you write a story about your trauma and sexual experiences? In part 3 of this 4-part series, Wendell Moss shares his story: "Sex & Sexuality" If you love story work, you'd love Husband Material Groups. Apply to join a group at husbandmaterial.com/group Drew Boa (MA, PSAP) a Certified Unwanted Guide and Inner Child Recovery Specialist. Drew i…

1
Episode 233: The Backlash from Those Defending Purity Culture feat. Zachary Wagner 1:04:54

1d ago1:04:54

1:04:54

With the release of so many books critiquing purity culture, what has the backlash been like? Well, let’s talk about it with Zachary Wagner, the author of Non-Toxic Masculinity as we celebrate the one-year anniversary of the launch of She Deserves Better. To Support Us: Join our Patreon for as little as $5 a month to support our work For tax deduct…

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Story Work For Men Outgrowing Porn: Why We Do Story Work (Part 2) 33:36

3d ago33:36

33:36

Why is story work absolutely essential for men outgrowing porn? In part 2 of this 4 part series, Chris Inman shares his story: "The Lonely Walk." If you love story work, you'd love Husband Material Groups. Apply to join a group at husbandmaterial.com/group Drew Boa (MA, PSAP) a Certified Unwanted Guide and Inner Child Recovery Specialist. Drew is t…

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Episode 232: When Submission "Cults" Groom for Abuse: One Woman's Story 1:03:43

7d ago1:03:43

1:03:43

We've got such a compelling interview with Lauren Rose from Called to Peace Ministries. She's telling her story--and it's a mesmerizing one--of what happened as her family got more and more into the Bill Gothard movement (and she was eventually one of the ones he allegedly abused, and was part of the lawsuit). But when you grow up feeling like your…

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Story Work For Men Outgrowing Porn: What Is Story Work? (Part 1) 40:59

10d ago40:59

40:59

What is story work? Where did it come from? What does it look like? In part 1 of this 4-part series, Drew shares his story: "The Day I Got Braces." If you love this series, you'd love Husband Material Groups. Apply to join a group at husbandmaterial.com/group Drew Boa (MA, PSAP) a Certified Unwanted Guide and Inner Child Recovery Specialist. Drew i…

1
Episode 231: Are We Saying that Wives Don't Have to Have Sex? 51:14

14d ago51:14

51:14

When we talk about how God made sex to be mutual, intimate, and pleasurable for both, and how, if women don't want sex, the answer is to figure out why, we invariably get people saying, "so you think women don't have to have sex then?" Today on the podcast we look at the 90% problem vs. the 10% problem. In 90% of cases where women don't want sex, t…

1
Porn and Inner Healing Prayer 21:23

18d ago21:23

21:23

What is inner healing prayer, and how can it help men outgrow porn? This episode is a preview of our new online course, "10 Ways To Heal Your Trauma: Resolving The Roots Of Porn And Sex Addiction." Get free access at healyourtrauma.com Resources for Inner Healing Prayer: Streams of Healing: Finding Your Way to Wholeness with Key Leaders in the Inne…

1
Porn and Polyvagal Theory (with John Kilmer) 23:56

25d ago23:56

23:56

What is Polyvagal Theory? How can it help men outgrow porn? John Kilmer skillfully describes the autonomic nervous system and how to (re)shape it in order to experience regulation without unwanted sexual behavior. John Kilmer is a Mental Health Life Coach, Occupational Therapist, and Certified Husband Material Coach. John has completed the Foundati…

1
Episode 229: A Victim-Centered Approach to Forgiveness After Trauma 56:26

1M ago56:26

56:26

Forgiveness is so often weaponized against victims in the church. But what does the Bible really say about forgiveness, especially when trauma is involved? How can we value our own mental health but also follow Jesus? This is a fascinating and healing conversation with Susannah Griffith, author of Forgiveness After Trauma. Our Sponsor: The Kingdom …

1
What Is God Doing In My Trauma? (with Matt Wenger) 20:56

1M ago20:56

20:56

We need a theology of trauma. In this episode, Matt Wenger powerfully invites us to view our trauma through the lens of Jesus's life, death, and resurrection. This episode is a preview of our new online course at healyourtrauma.com Matt Wenger is the clinical director of Boulder Recovery, a 14-day intensive for Christian men struggling with sex, po…

1
Episode 228: How Our Stories Influence Our Marriage Choices feat. Natalie Hoffman 1:06:45

1M ago1:06:45

1:06:45

Natalie Hoffman joins us today to talk about her INCREDIBLE memoir All the Scary Little Gods. Natalie escaped an abusive marriage, and now coaches other women in similar situations. In her memoir, she invites us to listen to the story from the point of view of Little Natalie, and using IFS (Internal Family Systems) to see it from all of her parts. …

1
How To Create Connection In Any Conversation (LIVE) 37:19

1M ago37:19

37:19

Do you long for connection, but it feels impossible? In this episode, you'll learn extremely simple tools and techniques to create connection in any conversation—using your eyes, face, voice, and words. Helpful phrases: Tell me more… What’s it like for you... How does that affect you? That makes sense (because)... It sounds like / I hear you saying…

1
Episode 227: Are We Creating a Strawman out of Complementarianism? We Respond to Critics 1:04:33

1M ago1:04:33

1:04:33

So many people resist admitting that they are actually egalitarians, because they think they have to be complementarian--even if they don't act like it. Today Sheila and her husband Keith dissect the arguments that are often used to say "we're really complementarian"--even when they're objectively not. And we invite people instead to preach what th…

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Why Men Don't Talk About Their Sexual Abuse (with Mike Chapman and Dr. Doug Carpenter) 1:43:23

2M ago1:43:23

1:43:23

There are over 40 reasons why men don't talk about their sexual abuse. Let's break the silence. In this episode hosted by Mike Chapman and Doug Carpenter, survivors of sexual abuse share vulnerable stories of harm and healing. Mike Chapman is a Certified Husband Material Coach and the leader of the HM fellowship for survivors of sexual abuse. Conta…

1
Episode 226: What We've Learned 3 Years After Great Sex Rescue 1:09:48

2M ago1:09:48

1:09:48

The Great Sex Rescue turns 3 this week! And it's been a super eventful three years. So much has changed. So let's talk about the feedback we've had, what we've done since, what people are saying--and where we're going from here. To Support Us: Join our Patreon for as little as $5 a month to support our work Or, for tax deductible donations in the U…

1
How To Tell Her About The Porn: Full Disclosure (with Dan Drake and Dr. Janice Caudill) 42:21

2M ago42:21

42:21

What is full disclosure? When, why, and how should I reveal sexual secrets to my wife? In this episode, disclosure experts Dan Drake and Janice Caudill walk us through the process of full therapeutic disclosure from beginning to end. You'll learn how to restore truth in your relationship in a way that is healing rather than harmful. Dan Drake and D…

1
Episode 225: Do You Even Want This Kind of Marriage? 56:35

2M ago56:35

56:35

Would our reaction to Christian marriage advice change if we realize how many people who write that advice are actually in abusive or destructive marriages? What if people in those marriages are more drawn to write marriage advice to process how they're feeling? Today we look at two different women that Focus on the Family have held up to be emulat…

1
152 Learning To Live Inside Your Body with Dr. Hillary McBride 39:22

2M ago39:22

39:22

I am joined today by Dr. Hillary McBride to discuss excerpts from her new book titled, “Practices for Embodied Living.” Topics covered include: how to feel your feelings, being alive in your body (eroticism), and the story of your relationship to your sensuality and sexuality. Finally, I ask Hillary about her beautiful claim that we often find the …

1
Healthy Fantasy vs. Unhealthy Fantasy 15:14

2M ago15:14

15:14

Your imagination is not bad. Learn the 4 main types of fantasies, how to evaluate the healthiness of a fantasy, and what to do with your healthy/unhealthy fantasies! Related episodes: Sexual Arousal vs. Sexual Desire How To Interpret Sexual Fantasies How To Analyze A Sexual Fantasy Introduction To Sexual Symbolism How My Sexual Fetish Shifted Over …

1
Episode 224: Lies Women Believe Part 2: Is God a Monster? 1:16:02

2M ago1:16:02

1:16:02

Lies Women Believe by Nancy DeMoss Wolgemuth taught concerning things about shame, trauma, and even what God is like. On today's podcast, we're joined by Becky Castle Miller, a doctoral student looking at emotions in the Bible, and Helen Blake, a licensed counselor in Sydney, Australia, to discuss some of the damaging teachings--and point us to a J…

1
A Grace-Based Approach To Sexual Recovery (with Jonathan Daugherty) 39:31

2M ago39:31

39:31

What is grace, and how does it apply to sexual recovery? Jonathan Daugherty inspiringly explains how grace is not "soft" but the most powerful force for transformation and freedom from porn. Pride, shame, and comparison all melt away under the core truth that you are worth the life of God's son, and that can never change. Jonathan Daugherty is the …

1
Episode 223: The Problems with Lies Women Believe by Nancy DeMoss Wolgemuth 1:28:22

3M ago1:28:22

1:28:22

Lies Women Believe by Nancy DeMoss Wolgemuth is one of the most popular women’s bible study books used in churches across North America. But what does the book actually teach about marriage? About sex? About divorce and abuse? It’s scary, and today Gretchen Baskerville and Natalie Hoffman join host Sheila Wray Gregoire to analyze the harmful messag…

1
Singleness & Same-Sex Attraction (with Dr. Greg Coles) 36:25

2M ago36:25

36:25

If you're single and you experience same-sex attraction, this episode is for you. Dr. Greg Coles offers insight, humor, delight, and hope that defies typical Christian categories of what a "good and beautiful life" can look like. Greg Coles is an author, speaker, and scholar at the Center for Faith, Sexuality, and Gender. Check out Greg's books (th…

1
Episode 222: How Sex Is Like Chef Boyardee–and Other New Research Findings! 55:31

3M ago55:31

55:31

Links to things mentioned: First, support us! Join our Patreon for as little as $5 a month to support our work Or, for tax deductible donations in the U.S., support our Good Fruit Faith Initiative through the Bosko Foundation Check out our Merch! Our Resources Sign up for Rebecca’s Friday emails The Orgasm Course (there’s also an add-on for husband…

1
151 What To Do With Desire and Dread with Mike Boland 41:02

3M ago41:02

41:02

Pastor and counselor Mike Boland shares a story from when he was 15 years old. It’s a story about the interplay of longing for connection and, at the same time, dreading what will be required of him in return. We talk about grooming, and the war of ambivalence that rages in one’s body in the midst of abuse. You can find out more about Mike’s work a…

1
Outgrowing Porn vs. Purity Culture 1:19:55

3M ago1:19:55

1:19:55

What is the difference between outgrowing porn and purity culture? In this replay from The Porn Free Man Conference, you'll experience dramatic examples of what these two approaches look like, sound like, and feel like when you are... Reaching out to a friend after watching porn (failure vs. feedback) Sharing vulnerable parts of your story (harsh a…

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Episode 221: Let Men Be Dads! Why Do So Many Evangelical Resources Portray Men as Pathetic Dads? 1:06:34

3M ago1:06:34

1:06:34

Links to things mentioned: Join our Patreon for as little as $5 a month to support our work https://patreon.com/baremarriage Or, for tax deductible donations in the U.S., support our Good Fruit Faith Initiative through the Bosko Foundation: https://secure.qgiv.com/for/goodfruits Check out our Merch–including our Love & Respect His & Her mugs: https…

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Outgrowing Porn Through Parts Work (with Dr. Gerry Crete) 47:59

3M ago47:59

47:59

How can parts work help us outgrow porn? Dr. Gerry Crete combines Christian faith, internal family systems, attachment theory, and EMDR into a powerful approach to outgrowing porn. Learn why we need to work with parts pre-emptively, how to "break the spell" when you're in a trance state, and practical ways Jesus can meet our attachment needs. Dr. G…

1
Episode 220: Why is Emerson Eggerichs Afraid of Women Talking? A Deep Dive into Love & Respect 53:28

3M ago53:28

53:28

Links to things mentioned: Join our Patreon for as little as $5 a month to support our work https://patreon.com/baremarriage Or, for tax deductible donations in the U.S., support our Good Fruit Faith Initiative through the Bosko Foundation: https://secure.qgiv.com/for/goodfruits Check out our Merch–including our Love & Respect His & Her mugs: https…

1
What To Do When Your Wife Is Triggered (with Tammy Gustafson) 39:46

3M ago39:46

39:46

How can a husband help his wife during a trigger? Tammy Gustafson reveals what triggers are, how they affect your wife's brain, and what she needs after a trigger tornado has passed. Discover how her triggers can become opportunities for healing! Tammy Gustafson is a trauma-informed Licensed Professional Counselor, coach, EMDR certified clinician, …

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Episode 219: Let Men be Men - Because We Believe Men are Great! 1:02:19

3M ago1:02:19

1:02:19

Links to things mentioned: Join our Patreon for as little as $5 a month, and get access to our Facbook group, unfiltered podcasts, and more! Thanks to everyone who helped us reach our fundraising goal! You can give to our work and get tax deductible donations (within the United States) by donating to the Good Fruit Faith initiative of the Bosko Fou…

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Healing Through Artwork and Storywork (with Philip Leach and John Kilmer) 58:37

3M ago58:37

58:37

What happens when you combine storywork, artwork, and Jesus? Witness powerful healing in this live demonstration of HMA Coaching! As Drew shares a story of difficulty, chalk artisan Philip Leach creates a visual representation while coach John Kilmer offers attunement. Then we invite Jesus into the story and watch the chalk art change. The result i…

1
150 Trauma Heals By Connecting With Others 35:12

3M ago35:12

35:12

The opposite of trauma is not "no trauma;" the opposite of trauma is connection. To be human is to be wounded. However, wounds heal naturally when the environment is right… and the right environment for healing is the empathic presence of another person. God made our brains and nervous systems to need one another. This is particularly true when it …

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12 Reasons To Stop Shaming Yourself 20:59

4M ago20:59

20:59

Learn 12 reasons why shaming yourself doesn't help, what's more powerful than shame, and what you can do instead of shaming yourself. Take the Husband Material Journey... Step 1: Listen to this podcast or watch on YouTube Step 2: Join the private Husband Material Community Step 3: Take the free mini-course: How To Outgrow Porn Step 4: Try the all-i…

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How To Help Your Partner Heal (with Carol Sheets) 35:55

4M ago35:55

35:55

How can I help my partner heal from the impact of my porn and sex addiction? Psychotherapist and author Carol Sheets reveals what sexually betrayed partners need most, and how you can "help her heal" when you create safety, practice empathy, offer validation, and take ownership without going into shame. This episode is super practical and full of g…

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149 Why Listening To Your Body Leads To Healing Part 2 30:25

4M ago30:25

30:25

Today I focus on two important ways that your body tells you things. The first is through your affect. Whenever your affect becomes dysregulated, your body is letting you know valuable information about your present environment… and about your past story. Dysregulation makes implicit memory known. And the second way that your body communicates with…

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Blessing vs. Cursing Yourself & The Story Behind Your Porn (with Chris Bruno) 30:42

4M ago30:42

30:42

How do you shift from self-condemnation to self-compassion? Chris Bruno reveals how to discover the story behind your struggle with porn. You'll learn what it looks like to rediscover your true "masterpiece-ness" even in the throes of a porn relapse. Our deepest healing lies in turning to the God who knows and created us in His image. Chris Bruno l…

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Episode 218: Let’s Pivot to Healthy Churches feat. Scot McKnight & Laura Barringer 59:34

4M ago59:34

59:34

Links to things mentioned: Partner with us at Good Fruit Faith, an initiative of the Bosko Foundation, as we help impact future church leaders with our data and our message (tax receiptable within the U.S.): https://secure.qgiv.com/for/goodfruits Join our Patreon for as little as $5 a month and get access to unfiltered podcasts! https://patreon.com…

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How To Analyze A Sexual Fantasy (with Dr. Doug Carpenter) 1:00:18

4M ago1:00:18

1:00:18

What can sexual fantasies teach us? How should we analyze them? In this episode, Drew and Doug vulnerably share and analyze each other's sexual fantasies so you can understand what this work practically looks like and how to do it well. The best place to start is Husband Material Academy, which opens up on January 1. Learn more at joinHMA.com Take …

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148 The Healing Power of Understanding Your Story with Dan Allender and Cathy Loerzel 39:00

4M ago39:00

39:00

You have a story and that story matters. Your story in your family of origin significantly affects the way you think, feel, and act in the world today. This is why Dan Allender says, “It is time to listen to your story.” What if healing begins by listening to your story? By reflecting on—and engaging—the experiences in your growing up years, you ca…

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Episode 217: When Religion Hurts You feat. Laura Anderson 1:01:31

5M ago1:01:31

1:01:31

Links to things mentioned: Our marriage survey is still open! We’re looking for married couples to take it. https://baremarriage.com/grim Join our Patreon for as little as $5 a month, and get access to our incredible Facebook group, unfiltered podcasts, and more! https://patreon.com/baremarriage Help us raise $52,000 by Christmas to expand our reac…

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Jay Stringer Podcasts

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