Be Less Dickish – self-help for men

Bear Psychology Podcast

If you have ever fallen into negative patterns of action or thoughts that fail you often AND you identify as male (or know a man you want to better understand) then this self-help guide provides humorous and relevant instruction.

David and Corey write this book together as a patient & therapist duo with insight into the pitfalls and possible strategies to deal with 4 primary destructive patterns that might be getting you or someone you know into trouble.

Listen to our conversation with therapist & co-authors David Coates & Corey Kilpack as we travel with them on their adventure to "Be less Dickish".

Coates is a therapist on a mission to help men figure things out so they are more successful in their relational and life endeavours.

Kilpack is a client who sought therapy to better understand his pitfalls and figure out a roadmap for a way out.

Together this duo have identified the following "douchebag" quadrants (their descriptor not mine!) that undermine one's best act in life. I have used their subtitles which provide more information to help the listener recognize the struggle:

• Aggression / Assertiveness (A-Hole)
• Imitation / Service (Douchebag)
• Victimization / Self-Care (Dick)
• Submission / Surrender ("Pussy)

And in special cases "Piece of S..t"

Adding a touch of humor to each story, the authors describe crass, destructive and non-productive strategies that change overtime to reveal that growth can happen with insight, understanding and new behaviour approaches.

We all have something to learn from their reflection on how these 4 (or is it really 5) characters who become triggered and learn to use the TRACE approach (Trigger, Reaction, Awareness, Curiosity and Experimentation) to increase self-awareness and behave more effectively, as a result.

Links & Resources:

• To purchase your copy visit: https://www.amazon.com/Be-Less-Dickish-These-Archetypes/dp/B08L47S3YG
• Be less Dickish - audiobook: https://www.audible.ca/pd/Be-Less-Dickish-Audiobook/B09CF74X47
• The meaning behind the insulting language in Be Less Dickish: https://youtu.be/GZTi1cHP_KY

Materials to Reference:

• Tips for men who want to improve: https://medium.com/hello-love/5-tips-for-men-on-improving-their-relationships-51f6043ec1b9
• What men really want: https://www.psychologytoday.com/ca/articles/201203/what-do-men-really-want & https://hbr.org/1993/11/what-do-men-want
• Man's search for Meaning (1946) Viktor Frankl: https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Man%27s_Search_for_Meaning