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Ros has found her new calling…Road Rage Influencer; when she’s not goading violent henchman types into ramming elderly drivers in dark tunnels, she’s flying helicopters over public roads while shooting at vehicles transporting highly unstable explosive materials. It all comes back to haunt her though when she has a reaction to a bad salad.Ed meanwh…
 
It’s all happening on the moon! Except it isn’t. The moon-base is staffed by the most normal, relaxed bunch of colleagues you’re ever likely to find in Doctor Who. It’s so relaxed that Ben stacks boxes, Polly waffles on about nail varnish and the doctor looks at shoes under a microscope. Ahh, lazy days…..But oh no! Scott has just head butted the mo…
 
The man without a face doesn’t have a face but he does have a face and another face.The woman with an unmentionable job and questionable taste in music has her name and someone else’s name and keeps extra hair by her bed but not by her other bed.A pair of medium atomic weights have taken to squatting in someone else’s dingy, squalid little flat whi…
 
aka ‘Stop Piscine About’The TARDIS crew go for a swim in their latest adventure when they discover the lost city of Atlantis!A mad mad scientist (that’s a mad scientist who’s then gone mad) with an equally mad accent has found the city and promised to raise it, but only he knows that to do it he must blow up the world! Ahahahahahaha!!! (see, i said…
 
A politician with a penchant for gardening who likes chocolate bars and compulsive gigglers is a big man in the ‘underground alternative medicine’ scene. When he’s not lurking in the cellars of his restaurant chain, he surrounds himself with a lot of card players; his secretary likes playing solitaire while his public relations advisor prefers snap…
 
How do you clean up Italian politics? You have two men on the go at the same time, while a third spirits you away for clandestine meetings where a man who can’t speak shoots imaginary teddy bears that look like you before going for a nighttime swim, then you have a secret wedding and invite spies who can’t sew to fight over who gets to watch it in …
 
Power Napping, Power Walking, Power Talking.Power Houses, Power Stations, Power Plants and Power Rangers.Wind Power, Wave Power, Solar Power and Battery Power.Steam Power, Flower Power, Super Power and Turtle Power.Executive Powers, Mental Powers, Higher Powers and Austin PowersThe Power of Love, The Power of Christ, The Power of Greyskull.The Powe…
 
Tegan’s keen to upgrade her driving licence. She’s already gone from car to ambulance and now she’s making the leap to time and space machine, but the engine’s over-heated and she’s got all hot and bothered. She needs to relax with a bit of indoor graffiti but she’s not quite at Banksy’s level yet.The Doctor’s had a nasty fall and he now thinks the…
 
Your estranged wife just caught you exchanging fluids with your ex-girlfriend so she shot at you. Your ex-girlfriend’s not even interested, she only came round to borrow a cup of milk. But before you know it she’s moved in and your jealous butler’s tried to start a bitch fight.You decide to avoid it all and spend the rest of the day in bed but your…
 
Your open-air mime rehearsal doesn’t go so well when your only audience member leaves for the countryside and the company of corpses. Naturally, you take your mind off it by looking for an invisible house in the sky but somehow you end up punching a duck.Confused, you decide to go to dinner with the most unlikely couple in all of time who are far m…
 
Ros is flying high with success and joins the mile spy club; she gets a private plane AND she gets to go in the cockpit. She does have to wear a ridiculous pair of glasses to watch the in-flight movie though. It’s the Twilight Zone and there’s this freaky little thing on the wing of the plane….Beckett’s fortunes take a bit of a dive, he’s all pumpe…
 
Not to be confused with Legopolis, which uses a different type of block transfer computation (although it does explain Adric’s hair)An air hostess has a disastrous first day when she gets on the wrong flight, shouts at the cabin crew and can’t find the emergency exit - although to be fair it’s a devil to get to.A precocious math’s nerd can’t decide…
 
What happens when a man who likes to climb tall buildings meets a man who likes to jump out of windows and they get into a car with a woman who knows how to use a fax machine?You get a team of remorseless killers who like to spy on businesswomen’s muesli, steal strangers’ family photos, wear hideous yellow ties and pretend to be nice to old people …
 
Welcome to Traken the happiest, most harmonious place in all of N-space.You’ve come at a bit of a bad time. Great Grandpappy Traken, King of Happiness, fell off his chair and died. Daddy Traken was supposed to take over as King but Mummy Traken hadn’t had her wedding night so she murdered Clever Uncle Traken and blamed it on Daddy. Old Auntie Trake…
 
How many Emohawks does it take to change an alert bulb?That and a whole Legion of questions will not be asked in this edition of TimeVault. Instead you have to spend the whole time looking for a Red Dwarf because somebody’s lost one. But remember, when the Psiren sounds it means you’re Out of Time.So you may prefer to spend your time watching Reven…
 
In this tharilling adventure, Adric’s lion about doing not very much at all, K-9’s got a bad case of time wind, and the Doctor’s hoping that the latest TARDIS faults haven’t made the warranty void.Romana’s not letting any of that bother her though, she’s found a nice empty little room with a comfy chair, some old photos and a pair of headphones and…
 
E-Space is well known for having the worst dental care of all the alphabet, so it’s no surprise that their state of decay has driven the Great Gumpire to set up a new clinic on ye olde fashionee world. He has a two point plan that seems a bit batty; he doesn’t use anaesthetic, just good old fashioned hypnotism, which isn’t in the least bit suspicio…
 
Choose trains. Choose no actual trains. Choose candles. Choose an elderly arsonist. Choose magically refilling flower pots, trip wires, stroppy ghosts and layers of dust. Choose an empty hotel, seances and barbed wire doors. Choose a submarine. Choose role-play with a pretty woman. Choose arguments with a heartless bastard. Choose a face full of mi…
 
Now, don’t get tetchy but there’s still a few things you need to do first. Are you wearing a red and white gingham dress with army boots? Have you eaten an edible Pot Noodle? Have you given pleasure to the World for having a great arse? Good, did you get a couple of handmaidens to ritualistically oil your nipples? Okay, well, as you’ve only achieve…
 
Leave your homework for a moment kid, there’s a giggling giant strolling through the house kicking down all the doors and a miserable git dumping all the food in your freezer. There’s a policeman knocking on the door, a couple of old soldiers running up and down the stairs, a hurricane in the kitchen and a fashion-conscious flirt burning all your s…
 
The Doctor and Romana have decided they need a bit of leisure time but everywhere’s booked solid and their last resort is the one remaining building in a war-torn wasteland (no dogs). Chucking K-9 in the sea, they go on holiday.Unfortunately, this particular holiday camp isn’t exactly a hive of activity; the staff keep dying of old age, the new own…
 
A group of S and M fanatics (wearing gimp masks made from their mum’s tights) get lost on a skiing trip to the South Pole. they stumble onto a secret military outpost at the same time as the Doctor, Ben and Polly. When a new planet appears in the sky everyone goes a bit mental.The Doctor’s having none of it, though. He’s far too old for that sort o…
 
Arrr! Avast, ye scurvy landlubbers, we be the fearsome Podcasters of Penzance!The Doctor and his land-lubbing stowaways arrive in somethingth century Cornwall where a dodgy bloke tells the Doctor a secret. they go to the pub where the Doctor gets kidnapped by Cap’n Hook’s evil brother. Polly feels confused as to her gender preference when she and B…
 
or Curly Chops and The Crack MuppetsA cruise ship captain who’s clearly not getting paid enough and a grumpy git with spaceship envy find themselves literally stuck together after one of them drives the wrong way down the space lanes. But that’s the least of their worries…There’s a drug problem running wild on the ship. It’s high time somebody smok…
 
Sun, Sand, Sea and Sex…well two out of four’s not bad I suppose.Tarrant goes on holiday to a timeshare he’s booked from a guy called Vern, unaware that it’s been double booked with a very image conscious politician. Her weekend at Vernie’s is turning into a rough night when they discover her ex-boyfriend dead in the cupboard. So when You, Me and Hi…
 
It doesn’t matter if you’re a small, off-duty Czechoslovakian traffic warden or a man with three heads waiting for a lift; put down the double-polaroid, grab a banana and come with us to WaxWorld where we plan to talk to you about Red Dwarf IV. We can’t promise to be interesting but i’m afraid the only way out is the huge 10lb black-ribbed knobbler…
 
Mystic Meg’s cosmic cousin needs help from the Doctor because he’s fallen down a hole and his only companion is Mr Blobby’s intergalactic pen pal, a huge green blob who can only communicate in single entendres. Things have been made worse because the hole is in the back garden of an upperclass murdering psychopath who’s not at all happy that she ha…
 
Something’s got them all in a crabby mood.Could it be the fact that someone’s programmed their answer machine message to spout a load of gibberish? or that Dayna appears to have sand in her character trait? Maybe it’s the fact that some random old bloke’s joined the crew without anyone realising or that Tarrant’s beginning to smell faintly of wet b…
 
A Fistful of Time Travellers – Doctor Who meets Carry On Cowboy as the time travellers look for a dentist in Westworld.After materialising in the stables, the Doctor tries to deal with rough, tough gunslingers at the O.K. Corral by calling them ‘my good man’ and ‘young fellow’, Steven demonstrates animal cruelty by strangling a cat in the saloon an…
 
Tarrant please start the musicJustin please light the lightsNow Sleer can raise the curtain on Bucol 2 tonight!Dayna is putting on make-upDayna is dressing up right.She's keen to get things started in the secret underground genetic experimentation laboratory tonight.Avon, meanwhile has decided that he needs to get a-head of the game, he doesn’t wan…
 
Mornin’ sir, welcome to Davrust’s Used Carleds. You came just in time sir, only got four left, they’re rollin’ off the forecourt. All from the Dalek range, we got a Shout, a Boom, a Tippytoe and a Nasty. Ignore them ones over there, they... do not move.Now, I know wha’choor finkin; they’re dented, they’re scratched, the paintwork needs a lot of car…
 
Avon’s got a problem. His big end’s gone. But not to worry, he knows where the nearest Honda garage is. Unfortunately, it’s just been swallowed up by a much larger federation, and their director (who’s a real cutie, by the way), is discontinuing the Honda Rebel. Avon has no choice but to look elsewhere. His only other option is to steal a new engin…
 
Welcome to the Annual General Meeting of the Agoraphobic Society. This year’s excursion will be through a magic door we’ve just discovered in the bathroom and there are a few things you’re going to need if you go through.1 x seasoned onion, large1 x bowl of cornflakes (wine-soaked)1 x hard-earned pea1 x yellow cable6 x IQ points3 x future selvesIf …
 
The Doctor and his companions become trapped in the house of a man wearing a kimono who forces them to play games against a honker, a queen and a fat man in shorts.Whilst Fu Man Chu’s English cousin challenges the Doctor’s hand to a four-week long game of Space Jenga, Steven and Dodo must keep playing lots of games until Dodo learns to listen to th…
 
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