The Basics of Self-Compassion with Marissa Esquibel, LMFT

The Codependummy Podcast

-What is self-compassion and how can it help heal from codependency?

-What are the basic elements of a self-compassion practice?

-How is self-compassion not self-indulgence, self-pity, or self-esteem?

Welcome to Episode 158! This week, I’m back after a short break to tell you all about SELF-COMPASSION. You’ll hear me define what self-compassion is and how creating a self-compassion practice can help us heal from our codependency. I will also break down the three basic elements of self-compassion: mindfulness, common humanity, and self-kindness. I end with a discussion on what self-compassion is NOT: it is not self-indulgence, self-pity, nor self-esteem. If you’re wanting and needing to be kinder to yourself, be sure to listen to this episode!

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More deets on the episode:

I begin with an honest apology for not airing an episode for the last 3 weeks! This solocast was originally set to air on Christmas Day and, evidently, my pregnancy and life got in the way! But I’m here now! And practicing compassion with myself for taking a while to get this episode up.

We have a brief check in to help you reflect on how you are doing.

Next, we dive in to the world of Self-Compassion, which is largely based on my research of the work by Kristen Neff. I break down the discussion of self-compassion in 3 parts:

1. What is Self-Compassion?

2. What are the 3 basic elements of self-compassion:

   1. Self-kindness versus self-judgment.

   2. Common humanity versus isolation

   3. Mindfulness versus over-identification

3. What is NOT self-compassion. It is NOT:

   1. Self-esteem

   2. Self-indulgence

   3. Self-pity

I conclude the episode with specific ways you can start to practice self-compassion this week:

1. Remind yourself of the 3 basic elements: common humanity, mindfulness, and self-kindness.

2. Listen to one of Kristen Neff’s meditations: http://self-compassion.com/ (go to the Practices page)

3. Review a difficult event through the lens of self-compassion.

Thank you for listening!

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